Dream of: 23 July 1991 "A Blow Fish"

I was in a house which reminded me of the House in Patriot. A woman (probably in her 60s) was here taking care of my brother Chris, who was bedfast and unable to move any part of his body due to muscular dystrophy. He couldn't even speak, although he could understand if spoken to. Feeling bad about Chris, and realizing he wouldn't live much longer, I thought I needed to stay here while he was still alive.

My mother appeared and I, completely naked, got into bed with her and lay next to her on my back. When she put her hand on my erect penis, I felt like telling her to stroke it, but I didn't. As I lay there, I enjoyed the feeling of her hand on my penis, but at the same time I felt guilty because I kept thinking of Chris lying in bed, unable to move. I wanted to do something for him, but there I was in bed with my mother. It wasn't a pleasant feeling.

***

After having gone searching for my grandfather Liston, I found him standing in a stream of water. As I waded out to him, the water at points reached my waist. When I found a place where the water only rose to my knees, I stopped. I wanted to tell Liston that he needed to talk with Chris, because Chris wasn't going to live much longer. I wanted to plead with Liston to sit and talk with Chris for perhaps an hour, and tell Chris of Liston's early life.

I noticed some nice cabin cruisers, almost yachts, in the water along the shore, along with some smaller boats. It occurred to me that I might like to live in a cabin cruiser like one of those, and that indeed I might have been living in one recently.

I also noticed some fish swimming in the water, and I particularly noticed some black and white zebra-stripped angel fish. They were small, little more than the size of a silver dollar. Some other fish about the size of my fist came up to the top of the water and blew water out. They looked like porcupine fish and as they blew out the water I thought, "That's a blow fish."

I thought it was interesting that there were still places where not all the fish had been killed.

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