Dream of: 14 June 1991 (2) "Mr. Jones"

I was in the country on a farm where I did not recall having ever been before. As I walked around outside past the large white farmhouse and the barn, I felt extremely depressed about my life. I felt emotionally drained, as if my life had been lasciviously squandered, defiled by debauchery. The feeling was made worse by the wholesomeness of the people living on the farm.

During my walk I encountered at intervals two strong men and a woman. The woman (probably in her mid 20s) was quite beautiful. She had long frizzy black hair, and exuded a fresh pure air. Although her purity contrasted starkly with my soiled nature, I was uncertain she detected how rotten I was. She seemed kind and she almost seemed to like me, although I certainly could not expect someone as radiant as her to be attracted by such a low-life as myself. The second time I ran into her she tweaked my cheeks and brushed my long side burns toward my ears, showing me a certain compassionate affection. When she blithely glided away, I felt so low I lay down and covered myself with a cover.

I could hear one man playing a guitar and singing nearby. I had earlier heard him singing a Bob Dylan song, and now he was chortling another Dylan song. He had an excellent voice and even in my misery I was thoroughly drawn into the song. I knew the words of the song, which seemed to be titled "Mr. Jones," and I thought how I could relate to the people living there if I only had a chance. But I did not see how I would be able to stay there. I was too unfit for a place as enchanted as that. So I kept the cover over my head and lay suffering until finally I felt someone's hands on me and a voice saying, "It's Eloise! It's Eloise!"

I knew immediately that the person was my friend Eloise LaGrone. I pulled back the cover, threw my arms around her and rocked back and forth in her arms. So happy to see her I uttered, "Eloise, I'm so glad you're here!"

I blurted out how debased I felt and how unhappy I was. She did not seem to understand why I was so depressed, but I gathered comfort from her smiling face. Yet I wondered where the black-haired woman was, who was prettier than Eloise. Although Eloise's energy seemed to wash away some of my pain, I still longed to be with the other woman. Yet at the same time it felt so good being with Eloise. It was hard to believe she had found me.

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