Dream of: 08 January 1991 "Heirat"

Louise and I were standing and talking with each other. She looked as if she were probably around 30; she was wearing a white sweater. I was happy that after having not communicated in such a long time that we were finally talking with each other. I was hoping I would see more of her; perhaps we could develop either a personal or a business relationship. I knew that she was married to Vernon and that I was married to Carolina; perhaps the four of us could be involved together in something. At one point, to demonstrate what I was talking about, I held both my hands in front of me as if I were clasping her breasts. But that didn't seem to please her.

It was getting close to 9 a.m.; at 9 o'clock I was supposed to go to a writing class. It was the first class of a new term in a college where I had enrolled. I also had other classes later in the day. But I was enjoying talking with Louise so much, I decided I would just skip the class. I figured nothing much would happen on the first day anyway. Besides, I really didn't like the class or college in general for that matter, and I was thinking of dropping out. It just seemed as if I weren't learning that much in the writing class. And since I had already graduated from law school, continuing in the class wasn't really necessary for me.

I talked of how I wasn't going to be around the area much longer because I intended to head to Latin America, perhaps Colombia. It was unclear exactly what I would be doing there, but I would be going.

As we talked I gradually realized I was no longer talking with Louise, but with Vernon. That disappointed me because I so enjoyed being with Louise. Vernon looked like a Latin American man (about 50 years old). He was wearing a white shirt and what appeared to be straw hat; he had a black mustache. He was cordial and I didn't mind being with him, although I would have preferred being with Louise. I was still thinking of the possibility of him, Louise, Carolina and me doing something together. But I didn't think Carolina would like him.

Since we both practiced bankruptcy law, we talked some of that. I knew that his and Louise's business was much larger than mine, but that I still had a substantial number of clients. I had taken on over 250 new cases the year before. Vernon spoke of how he had recently acquired a new source of clients which would bring him an extra $20,000 a month. Apparently the source was from someone who dealt in real estate. I chimed in that real estate people were the best sources of clients, and although I didn't mention it to him, I thought about how my main source of clients dealt in real estate.

***

I had driven my 1980 silver Honda Prelude to a field beside a flooded river. I even pulled the car a short ways into the water that covered the field, got out and traipsed on through the water which covered the road, until I reached a wooded area. I was thinking about what would happen if I were to kill Vernon, bring his body down to the river and put it in the water. Would it decompose before the river sank back in its banks? Or as the water receded, would the odor lead someone to the body.

Somehow I reached a point were I was atop a ledge on an abandoned brick building, and I had to climb about five meters to the ground. I carefully placed my hands and feet on the bricks and began my descent. I imagined what it would be like if one of the bricks gave away and I fell on my back to the ground. Finally I was close enough to the ground to jump down.

Just as I reached the ground, I heard some voices; saw a couple men were riding brown horses through the trees. As I walked back toward my car, I was astonished to see that the water had already receded from the road and that it was even already dry in places. Looking ahead to my car, I saw that other cars were parked in front of my car and in back of it, and that several more cars were parked in the field. I thought how if Vernon's body had been there it would have been visible to all the world.

As I continued walking, the word "Heirat" came into my mind. I didn't know why I would be thinking of that particular word, and began pondering its meaning.

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