Dream of: 15 June 1989 "Unliked"

I was in a room with probably 10 other people; we were all standing around a large brown round table. We were part of a spiritual organization. Although I enjoyed the organization, I hadn't been getting along with most of the members, and it had become increasingly clear to me that no one in the group liked me. As I stood here, I decided it was time to speak out and say what I thought the problem was.

I said I wanted to talk to the group on a personal level. I said there were certain people in the group whom I liked and other people in the group whom I didn't like. Across from me was a pretty black-haired woman (perhaps in her late 20s). I identified her as my old friend Steve Weinstein; I said I liked her, although I didn't think she liked me any longer. I then pointed out about four other people whom I liked, but who I thought didn't like me.

I pointed out the people who didn't like me. There were basically two: Mark Linnimon (a fellow whom I first met at the Dallas Zen Center in 1986) and someone else. While I was talking, Newton (a former law professor0, dressed in a black robe, walked in. Apparently he also was somehow connected to the group. By this time it had become clear to me and everyone else that I wasn't only saying what I thought about the people in the group, but that I was in the process of resigning from the group. Someone explained to Newton that I was leaving the group.

I didn't think Newton wanted to see me leave the group and I thought he might say something against my leaving. In fact, I thought most people in the group didn't really want to see me leave, although most didn't like me. It bothered me that I wasn't liked and I didn't know why I had become so unliked. I only knew I had had differences with the other members which I simply hadn't been able to resolve.

I continued talking and then remembered my good Dallas friend Eloise LaGrone was a member of the group, although she wasn't there today. She was the one person in the group who still liked me; that thought made me feel good. I ought to mention her name as someone whom I liked.

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