Dream of: 08 August 1986
(2) "Regaining Strength"
I was in the Travis
Street Apartment (where I lived alone in Dallas, Texas from November 1984 to
March 1986) and was trying to call Mireya (a Dallas acquaintance from Colombia
whom I met in 1985) on the phone. I had talked to her earlier and was trying to
reach her again, but she had left her phone off the hook. I could hear her
talking in the background. A man had been there with her, but he had left. Now
her boyfriend, who spoke a little English, was with her.
Suddenly, I heard a dial
tone on the phone and immediately my phone rang. I answered and the operator on
the other end asked me if my phone was on the hook. I explained to her that I
had been trying to get through to someone and I asked her if someone was trying
to get through to me. She said someone was trying to get through and said
something about “Ohio.” I thought perhaps my mother was trying to reach me.
Suddenly, I heard
someone coming up the back stairs. I walked into the kitchen, opened the door,
and found my ex-wife Bonnie standing there in her gray coat. I invited her in.
With her was a large, lanky dog which looked as if it were part Weimaraner.
Bonnie walked into the living room and sat down. I asked her if she had been
trying to call me and she said she had, but the phone had been busy. She said
she had been the one who had called the operator.
The room was rather
disorderly (but not dirty) and things were sitting all
around. I sat down at the dining table, which was also in the front room, and
which had some food on it. Apparently, I had earlier prepared a large meal for
myself with five or six different types of vegetables. Since there was so much,
I thought Bonnie would think I had prepared the meal for me and someone else;
but it had just been for me. One plate had food on it, including what appeared
to be a pork chop and some other kind of meat. I stuck a fork in the pork chop
and stuck a piece of it in my mouth. I looked at Bonnie and said, "Meat."
She looked surprised
that I was eating meat. I began thinking that I had recently had a dream about
my brother Adolph (1954-1962) and that I needed to eat some meat to get some
strength back. I was unsure of the exact connection between the dream and my
eating meat, but I thought there was one.
Bonnie, who seemed
distraught and upset, began talking. She rambled on about how she needed
someone to talk to tonight. She had gone to her mother's house, but her mother
had seemed so cold and distant. So, she had come to see me. She said she had
been under a lot of pressure.
I knew she had been
going with a fellow named “Arnold” for a long time. I knew they were close and
that she had been having sex with him. Apparently, they had separated. Bonnie
said, "What a decision it was to have left Arnold. In the literal sense of
the word."
I stood up, headed
toward the kitchen, and said, "Bonnie, with you, it's in every sense of
the word."
The dog was lying in the
corner of the kitchen scratching itself. I thought it was too big and that all
it did was lie around and scratch. I said, "He's too big. He scratches too
much. People are unhappy to see him coming."
I looked at Bonnie and
said, "Are they happy to see you coming?"
Bonnie agreed with me
about the dog. She was not happy with it now that she had it.
I did not feel close to
Bonnie. She took off her coat and shoes. I thought she was probably going to
take off her clothes and spend the night there. I did not care, but I did not
want to have sex with her. I was unsure I wanted to sleep nude with her because
we might get close, which I did not want.
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