Dream of: 18 April 1985 "Venereal Disease"
I was in a bedroom lying in bed with a girl I had recently met. She was slender and shapely and was wearing a pink nightgown. We lay talking with each other, but hadn't yet touched or kissed – although we were gradually getting closer and closer. I was a bit shy about actually trying to touch her, although I almost touched her a couple of times. Another woman was in the room sitting at a couch at the foot of the bed.
I was lying on my back; suddenly the girl moved over and sat right on top of me. We continued talking and she raised her night gown over top her breasts. I reached up and began feeling her breasts. She then bent backwards. I looked for the other woman on the couch, but saw she had left.
The girl lay back down beside me. I wanted to kiss her. I realized that I hadn't kissed anyone except Louise in years and that it would be strange to kiss someone else. I also wanted to have sex with her; how strange having sex with someone else would be.
Suddenly she asked me if I had any disease, such as syphilis or AIDS. It struck me I hadn't even been thinking about that; I needed to be on guard about venereal diseases. I hesitated and said, "No. I don't have anything. What about you?"
She then admitted she had AIDS. But when she said that, I thought she meant she had herpes. I realized there was no way I could have sex with her. She continued, "So maybe we're going to need one of those protective devices."
She was referring to a condom. But I had already decided to stop and not have sex with her anyway. I definitely wasn't going to take the chance of catching herpes. But actually the danger was much worse, because she actually had AIDS and not herpes.
I could tell she was sad we weren't going to have sex. I began wondering what kind of girl she really was if she had managed to catch the disease. She had probably been with many different men and been rather promiscuous.
I still liked her and hated to just leave her. She sat up and began unbuttoning my pants. I said, "What are you doing?"
She didn't respond. I looked more closely at her face. She still seemed pretty, but she seemed a bit unclean now that I knew she had the disease. I thought perhaps she was unbuttoning my pants so she could perform fellatio on me. But I knew I was going to stop her and I wasn't going to let her do that either, because herpes could be contracted through oral sex.
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