Ultimately, Oedipus was ennobled by his shame because after he plucked out his eyes, he was regarded as a good and noble man, praised by Apollo himself. The act which seems insane to me is the very act which ennobles Oedipus.

Dream of: 16 September 1982 "Voices At Night"

With a cigarette dangling in my mouth, I was riding a motorcycle toward Portsmouth. Rather late at night I arrived at a white house in which my mother was living. I had never been to the house before. After I dismounted the motorcycle, my mother and my father met me at the door. I felt uncomfortable smoking the cigarette, but I continued anyway.

After I had entered the house, my mother went to bed and my father and I walked out onto a little patio where stood a couple couches on which we were going to sleep. While my father lay down on one couch and covered up, I sat down on the other couch. We talked and I continued smoking my cigarette until it was almost down to the filter. Then I picked up a cup which had some moist noodles in it and put out my cigarette in it.

When I had entered, I hadn't even touched my father, much less put my arms around him. I thought perhaps I should go over to him and hug him while he lay there.

He asked me about a girl named Lisa, but I wasn't quite sure what he was talking about.

My mother being there with my father seemed so strange since I knew she had recently married a man named Leo Weber (a marriage in 1982 which only lasted for a few weeks). When I asked my father if Leo were in the house, he said that Leo had found another lover and had left. I wasn't satisfied with that answer. I suspected my father had forced Leo to leave.

I stood and walked into the next room where my mother and my sister were sleeping in double beds. My mother was lying in the bed closest to the door. I walked in and whispered, "Are you awake?"

She responded, "What?"

She obviously had been sleeping. She sat up. I walked to the edge of the bed and asked, "Where is Leo?"

She put her arms around me and we both knelt down beside the bed. She reached between my legs and seemed to be trying to feel my penis. I wasn't wearing any pants or shorts. She asked, "Do you know anything about someone sending letters to people saying they can read your mind?"

Her words startled me and made me feel uneasy. She continued talking. Finally she grabbed my penis and pulled it around behind my back. It stretched out about two thirds of a meter and caused me some discomfort. I wanted her to let go. I pulled her hand back around and tried to open it. I told her she had to let go and finally she did. I thought for a moment we were going to have an actual fight, but then things cooled down. I could see something was wrong and I just wanted to humor her until I could escape.

When she continued talking about Leo, I inferred that someone had written letters saying they could read Leo's mind. Apparently Leo had believed the letters and had left my mother for some reason. I had a strange apprehension about the whole matter. I recalled that I had written Leo a letter, but I knew my letter hadn't been like the ones to which my mother was referring. Now that Leo had left, everyone had concluded that Leo was insane.

My mother continued, "He hears voices at night from people on the other side of the universe."

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