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My On-line Goodbye

Welcome to my on-line farewell. My name in Rob, and this is my goodbye letter to the world. The reasons I have decided to kill myself are many and varied. So please bear with me as I try to explain.

First let me say, I am a failure. I am the sorriest excuse for a man there ever was. There is a serial killer who has been called " a better man then me." I am a coward because I do not like confrontations, and I tend to run from problems. I am stupid. I made a few financial, and personal mistakes. I am too stupid to be a success, or even much of a failure.

I had a dream of being one of the great webmasters. This was a stupid fallacy to think I could ever be anything more than I am. Why endeavor to succeed, when there is no one to lift you up, and only those to tear me down. The one person I thought would believe in me, only destroyed my dream, by showing me reality.

Why strive for better, when betrayal is around the corner? The one I thought was my greatest ally, turned out to be my greatest foe. The one I thought would stand by me, no matter what, turned out to be the one who turned on me. The one I thought would be my greatest supporter, turned out to be my greatest critic.

I do not, nor have I ever fit in to society. I have always "marched to the beat of a different drummer." I do not have the social skills we all take for granted.

I have done nothing but bring pain and frustration to the people around me. I have lost every friend I have ever had. People who get to know me, do not like me. I stand alone in the world, desiring companionship, but not worthy of it.

I hurt the one person that meant the most to me, and I meant the most to her. For that alone I deserve to die. What is life if I am going to hurt people? Especially one who trusted me with her heart. I am sorry for that, and not a day goes by that I do not wish she could forgive me.

I have been nothing but a disappointment to my friends and family.

In closing, let me say, even though none will mourn my passing, I do hope I am at least remembered. If by no one else, my enemies. To my enemies, which are most people who have ever known me, I have one thing to say..... YOU WIN !!!

Rob