Your package was in my eye.
Janet Barrera
Girl, don't you know that's the devil? You can't escape!
Camille Bright
My view of the world is not very rational. I pray all the time that an angel will come down and bring me a million dollars. It's gonna happen someday, I know it.
Camille Bright
Go snort some Tylenol.
Tino Cantu
Every $10 word has it's flea market version.
Tino Cantu
And to think we could have had wonderful zebra children.
Tino Cantu
That was the first time that we ever spoke outside cyberspace!
Nick Cheatham
I think he has like a drop of gayness in him. Just a tad of fruit filling.
Nick Cheatham
I don't know 'bout you touching me!
Cherice Cochrane
Ugly parents make ugly babies.
Cherice Cochrane
Homophobic! Homo - Phobic! That means you're scared of gays, duh!
Josh Cone
Prince William is just my size.
Joanna Cowen
And what does French kissing lead to? The Big Nasty Bump and Grind!
Joe Dubois
How can you talk to that guy when you ruined my high school menu?!?!?!?
Joe Dubois
Laura's the shotgun Nazi.
Wes Faulk
It's like, reality check.
Phillip Fenstermaker
George is the master of electricity.
Justin Freeman
Cherice is the quote Nazi
Kristie Friesenhahn
Oh my God, it's not a Kleenex!
Kristie Friesenhahn
I think they owe it to society because their nuggets aren't very good.
Kristie Friesenhahn
Well the pee's gone, but the toilet paper's still there.
Kristie Friesenhahn
I'm gonna puke apples!!!!!
Kristie Friesenhahn
I had to get all naked in front of grandma.
Ken Fulton
You can't fake gas.
Emily Gaskin
This is a rake and shovel conversation. No hoes allowed.
Julie Gresham
Could you stop the stream of bullshit coming from your fingers for a minute?
Ryan Haun
How do I get a plus, plus, and a donut minus?
Professor Herman
You can't tell if a baby's gay or not.
Justin Kilpatrick
Now I'll wake up screaming til I die.
Justin Kilpatrick
I wouldn't piss on his gums if they were on fire!
Justin Kilpatrick
It's all gravy.
Cory Landry
If you ever don't stop eating your own species.
Shamiria Lindsey
Excuse me, is that my hair you're wearing?
Shamiria Lindsey
Cause we'll step on his ass.
Shamiria Lindsey
Them brand new bootie chokers, ain't they?
Shamiria Lindsey
It only does that to people it likes. (in reference to tehphone making noises)
Shamiria Lindsey
Your hair looks pretty today. I love that frizz.
Mrs. McCabe
I can't get enough of evil. I LOVE IT!!
Mrs. McCabe
I don't care about your future!!!!
Mrs. McCabe
If you don't think I can't kick A the Judson way, you're wrong.
Mrs. McCabe
Don't worry, Cherice has the magic spit.
Ben McDaniel
The best part of waking up is a house up in yo' bus.
Vicki McNamara
You don't have to be just strictly dickly.
Alan Moe
What's your IQ? No it's not liar cause you're not that smart.
Derec Moore
I thought her name was Allura cause she can ALLURE me!
Derec Moore
Instead of the golden touch she said you have the shitty touch.
Stephen Morin
Unlock the chocolatey goodness!
Marc Newton
Damn I'm suck.
Mai Nguyen
Damn! Last time I saw you were last night and you annoy me so much!
Mai Nguyen
I'm gonna get a tattoo of a bulldog on my butt and when I'm older, it'll be a Shar Pei.
Manuel Oaxaca
Why do I have to wash my hands? I didn't pee on them.
Manuel Oaxaca
Damn you Satan, leave me be!
Rey Padron
You fools need to lay off the crack.
Rey Padron
Cuz tapping hurts more than grabbing.
Chris Pencikowski
Start your curving bastard ball.
Ross Pruett
What is that precious juice?
Ross Pruett
Ew! Alyssa's got turtle mouth!
Ross Pruett
I have a question. If you paint something underwater, will it stay painted or will it all wash off?
Ross Pruett
Damn it Laura, the minute I don't spoon feed you topics of conversation look at the crap that comes out of your mouth.
Ross Pruett
Laura was blessed by the bosom goddess.
Ross Pruett
I'm talking bout, can't leave the room cause you eat too much chicken
Ross Pruett
I think economics is better than strawberry cheesecake . . . at Olive Garden.
Miss Revels.
I'd have to bust some skulls.
Marcy Reyna
I thought you were gonna spray it on his winkle.
Marcy Reyna
He wanted to go "NOOGIE NOOGIE NOOGIE!"
Matt Rooney
Look at these cheeks!
James Roy
Release! Release!
Laura Roy
Kristie's the braless wonder!
Laura Roy
Oh my God! My water broke!
Laura Roy
Can I go spelunking in your purse?
Marcos Santiago
I taste good fried.
Marc Schulz
If you don't get caught, my only wish is that you get operated on by a doctor who cheated his way through medical school.
Mrs. Schwab
He is seriously pissing my eyes off!
Sandra Severe
Damn! I'm sorry, I gave you the impression that I gave a fuck!
Sandra Severe
Why are you a stalker?
Sandra Severe
I thought you were calling him that because his lip dunlapped over his face.
Sandra Severe
Y'all never heard of the dunlap syndrome?
Sandra Severe
The sunlight seeped into the room like a disease.
Iman Shebaro
Quitas mis huevos. (While pointing)
Justin Sinclair
No dude, it's like, not gum.
Justin Sinclair
Nobody plays the lyre.
Justin Sinclair
We can still be friends, I just want your soul.
Justin Sinclair
I hope to God this is mayonnaise.
Justin Sinclair
Turn around! I wanna make fun of you.
Justin Sinclair
She said if you put them in a can and feed them, you get paint.
Justin Sinclair
Go . . . head . . . OOOOOON!
Chris Smith
That's all macked up!
Jason Snyder
You need to apologize to me, to the class, and to the bird!
Mrs. Spencer
I feel like I'm riding a toilet strapped to a bucking bull. Saddle up and pee.
Fred Tabares
Big nipples are a blessing.
Amber Tafoya
Look! It's a kidney in a blanket.
Amy Tindall
Pretend I didn't say that. I was just testing you to see what would happen in an emergency situation such as this.
Angela Tindall
Can I be the star?
Susie Tindall
I could be all, "Hello, would you like some drugs?"
Susie Tindall
Maybe your children will have tails, but not mine!
Susie Tindall
Wait til you see how ugly everyone is!
Susie Tindall
Kate tiene la chingada palabra.
Profesor Treme
May Carmex live in your ear forever!
Cynthia Tucker
Can you liven up the dots?
Mrs. Vader
It sounds like Chuckie's in the closet waiting to come out.
Mr. Whipkey
I'm hungrier than a Somalian at a barbecue on a Sunday afternoon after church at 2 o'clock with no fingers!
Marranda Whitlow
Ross! We can see your penis!
Judi Lina, Sonia, and Cherice Cochrane
It's supposed to be hard. If it wasnt hard, everybody would do it! The hard is what makes it great!
A League of Their Own
Tis as like have angels fly out of your arse as get next to the likes of her.
Titanic
Fuck the family, the family fucked my husband!
Soul Food
I could get you a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up. Now you will go to sleep or I will put you to sleep!
Happy Gilmore
Sure brain, but if the plural of mouse is mice, shouldn't the plural of spouse be spice?
Pinky and the Brain
She fell out of the "suck your dick" tree and hit every branch.
Varsity Blues
You're fat! You're ugly! You make me sick!
Babycakes
That's a fragrance of love scented candle, bitch! Damn!
Can't Hardly Wait
I wish i was never artificially insemenated in the lab!!
Austin Powers
A fish and a bird can fall in love, but where will they build their nest?
Corrina Corrina
He said he wouldn't touch me if I poured whiskey on my body and put a bag over my head.
Bastard Out of Carolina
Think you've said sumptin kewl or funny that deserves to be on this page? E-mail me and I'll let you know if you're cool enough to have your quote here. :}
