The Music of Bitty

5 months and 12 days
after I gave up my child
crying in mourning
from quitting in devastation
4 months
more I listened for her
fighting in possibility building
walls of tolerance crashing upon
3 weeks
when I screamed in desperation
leaving trust to wonder then
speechlessly going into
13 days
which I laid silently
proving sanity
before falling into
207 hours
alone I stood
exhausted weak with energy
when rights of dignity exploded into
41 oceans
understanding I wrote trust in willingness
removing fears ending in worry of
terror in loosing within distress before
feel I must
hold back fear of devastation
giving care and love with
110 high hopes
believe I will
beg of her forgiveness
and thank heartfelt mercy, for instinctive interest.

This beautiful life
in which I exist, and cherish each moment
giving back the best, is the same one
which has taught me about emptiness...
August 27,1999


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