Spatula Queen VS the Black Rose
Spatula Queen VS The Black Rose
Started by: Kodachi Kunou
Kodachi Kunou stalked confidently down the streets of Nerima, making a bee-line for the most accursed Okonomiyaki shop in town, Ucchan's. She had thought long and hard about this, putting much of her considerable intellect into the project.
She knew that she was the one that truly loved Ranma. The others wouldn't let him go due to various obligations he or his father owes them. The simplest way to prove her love was to invalidate the claims of the others.
She decided to take them one at a time, and figured Ukyou was as good as anyone to start with.
Kodachi stormed into Ucchan's with her ribbon in the ready position. She snapped her ribbon out knocking the okonomiyaki that Ukyou was working on off of the grill.
"You there, Harlot!" Kodachi laughed snobbishly at her. "I have decided that there are too many women with claims on darling Ranma-Sama. There for I am reputing the claims one at a time, starting with you! I challenge you to a fight to keep your claim on Ranma-Sama! Hhohohohohohohohohohohohohoho!"
Ukyou Kuonji looked at Kodachi like she didn't believe her eyes.
"You want to fight for Ranchan? But I... oh never mind, let's get this over with," she said, drawing her small throwing spatulas and held them in her hand, waiting for a move.
Laughing insanely the Black Rose threw her School uniform off exposing the beautiful, shapely leotard clad gymnast underneath. Kodachi twirled her ribbon about herself in a lovely circular pattern.
"Prepare to Die, harridan!" She snapped her ribbon out, entangling Ukyou's right wrist, as she jumped onto the countertop.
Ukyou, dressed in her chefs outfit, i.e. her usual black leggings and shift shirt, reacting quickly, jumped up and launched a kick to Kodachi's midriff while disentangling her wrist with a quickly flick with one of her spatulas. "Harridan? Take that back, you spandex freak!"
Kodachi. reacting quickly jumped to the side, rolling gracefully onto a table. Ukyou's customers making a run for the back door.
She turned back toward the chef and sneered at her. "Why should I take back the truth!"
"HOOP!"
From somewhere to the right a hoop was thrown at Kodachi who caught it in the middle. Grinning evilly she threw her patented 'Razor Hoop' while leaping into the air at Ukyou. Making the chef decide weather to take a hit from the hoop or from her.
"FLOUR BOMB!"
A cloud of some white powder engulfed the inside of the restaurant, obscuring the visibility greatly, making you see about three feet before the white fog kicked in. Ukyou threw herself to the left, landing silently on the side of the counter, drawing her monster spatula.
Kodachi crashed into the wall where Ukyou was at a second ago, narrowly missing her and knocking a good sized hole in the wall. Rolling silently back from the wall, she strained her other senses to see through the cloud.
Thinking quickly she began twirling her ribbon as fast as she could, summoning up a bit of wind to help dissipate the cloud.
Locating the source of the whirling sound, Ukyou threw her small spatulas in the direction of said sound, hoping to hit Kodachi.
Kodachi heard the distinctive whoosh of flying spatulas. Spinning and twisting out of the way she finally was able to get above the flour cloud.
"you quite skilled Ukyou, but not skilled enough for the Black Rose!" That's when she noticed her ribbon had been sliced to little pieces by Ukyou's spatulas.
"No worries. CLUB!"
From off to the right several clubs flew at Kodachi, which she caught gracefully. "prepare to face the Attack of 1000 clubs!!" Kodachi charged Ukyou with her clubs striking so swiftly it looked like she was using 10 or 20 of them.
From the side, Sasuke hid in the shadows carrying tons of Rhythmic Gymnastics tools.
Kodachi actually scored a few hits as Ukyou scrambled to block the strikes. Her eyes darting to the small ninja in the shadows, Ukyou flipped over a table and threw a small spatula in his direction, making him yelp in terror and scramble for the exit.
When the door stopped closed behind him, Ukyou turned her eyes to the spandex-freak.
"So hard to find good help these days, no?" she said, readying her large combat spatula. "Now remind me, how does you defeating me, and the Pacific freezes over that is, invalidate my claim on Ranchan? If you recall, or your deluded mind maybe chose to forgot, as long as I want to be engaged to Ranchan, I'll remain so. And trying to beat me up won't probably do anything except makin me stubborn about it. But if that's what you want..."
Kodachi jumped to the side for a quick breather. She made a mental note to punish Sasuke severely for running out on her. " I want nothing more than your defeat." She practically screamed at Ukyou "You don't love him, none of you do, your only after him because of his father! I'll repudiate the claim and free Ranma-Sama from all of your clutches! Hohohohohohohohohooh!"
Hitting the hidden switches on her clubs Kodachi activated the 'Spike' feature. She charged at Ukyou once again aiming for her head. "I'll kill you if I have to! But I will free Ranma-Sama!!"
Ukyou dodged the spiked club neatly, swinging her spatula quickly, forcing the Black Rose to jump back for a second, long enough for Ukyou to get into a defensive position with her spatula held much like a Bo-staff.
"You love him? Ha! You're just obsessed with the idea of him!"
Kodachi came to a sudden halt as she landed on one of the tables. She deactivated her spikes and turned demurely toward Ukyou. There was enough distance between the combatants for a quick break.
"Obsessed? Moi? I do not think so, Kuonji!" She started her monologue full of arrogance. " Ranma-Sama saved my life, and I will not rest until I repay him for his kindness and prove to him that I am the one who truly and forever loves him.."
She closed her eyes slightly in memory as she spoke of her Darling Ranma.
Ukyou sighed at the enormous arrogance Kodachi showed by closing her eyes during a fight and decided to end it quickly and mercifully. With a might heave, she brought down the Spatula of Vengeance and righteousness heavily on Kodachi's head, making her konk out.
"Well finally," Ukyou said, looking around at her restaurant.
It took a few moments, but Kodachi finally started to come around. Her first thoughts upon awakening all had to do with failure. It seemed that she was getting pretty good at failure lately.
She sat up rubbing the back of her head where the Mega Spatula had pounded her. "What will you do with me, Kuonji?"
"Oh, I dunno," Ukyou said, looking thoughtful. "I suppose that I could roll you in sauce and grill ya, but that wouldn't help, would it?"
Seeing the gymnasts reaction, she continued. "Or, we could talk like sane people."
Kodachi simply stared at Ukyou for a moment, she had no idea what the Chef was getting at. She picked up an overturned chair and sat right down. "Sane people? That's novel, What are we to talk about?"
"Ohh, I don't know... Ranchan maybe?"
Kodachi smiled slightly at the thought of Darling Ranma-Sama, thinking of him always had that sort of effect on her. Then the smile faded away when she realized that she had failed him again. She would never be able to win him over at this rate.
"What does it matter anymore? " Kodachi sniffled slightly. "I failed once again to win his heart. It'll never happen at this rate, there's just too much competition, and I'm out of plans."
"Oh." Ukyou said. "Well, Ranchan and I... umm..." Ukyou's voice trailed off there.
Kodachi caught something in the way Ukyou spoke Ranma's name. There was a change there, something was missing. It didn't take Dachi long to figure it out. The romantic love was gone. Love was still there, but there was no desire.
Kodachi's jaw dropped when she realized that she was fighting Ukyou over something she didn't want anyway.
"Ukyou, you don't love Ranma anymore do you?"
"What!" Ukyou exclaimed. "Of course I do! Well, no, not that way, more like a sis... uhh..."
'A sister?' Kodachi thought to herself. 'This just gets better and better.'
The irony of the situation was just way too much for her. All this trouble over nothing, Ukyou had already dropped out of the running. Kodachi began to laugh, and laugh hard at everything that had happened. her laughter was odd, it wasn't the haunting insane laughter that she usually used. It was the laughter of someone who had heard the funniest joke in the world. She smiled as she laughed, the ironic humor evident in her eyes.
Her laughter calmed down for a moment and she wiped a single tear of laughter away. "That's just they way fate likes me I guess. I'm sorry I attacked you Ukyou, I did so without reason." She smiled and winked at the Okonomiyaki chef. "I'll even pay for the damages to your business. "
"How... nice of you," Ukyou said carefully, a bit scared by Kodachi's odd reaction.
"if only I had known before we started fighting." Kodachi finally stopped laughing. "we could have avoided this entire ugly situation. I had won before we started simply because you had already achieved the goal I was fighting for."
"Now there are only two to deal with, that Chinese hussy Shampoo and Akane Tendou." She glanced at Ukyou with a smile playing on her lips. "Would you like to help me, Ukyou?"
"I have nothing against Akane," Ukyou said, "and as for Shampoo, as long as she doesn't bother me, I wont bother her."
Ukyou neglected to mention the fact that she thought of Kodachi as a lunatic.
"Very well my friend, I shall do this on my own." Kodachi spun her ribbon in a spiral pattern flooding Ucchans with black rose petals. Within a moment Kodachi was done. The only evidence of her passing was the damage to the shop, black rose petals, a small stack of money and her haunting laughter echoing into the distance.