What is wrong with me...

I...am a novelty. After countless hours of contemplation and self scrutenization I have come to the conclusion that I am a cheap pair of rubber breasts at Spencer's gifts. What has brought me to this conclusion is a enlightening event that took place the week of February 9-14. After seeing this preppy sorority girl for a few weeks, I was chastised for the most minute problems and then promised a call the next day. That call never came. This little situation opened up my eyes to a whole part of myself that I had never examined before.

This is the ecentric, alternitive guy side of me. The side of me that wears baggy pants, unique shirts, a wallet chain, an earing, short hair with long sideburns, and a smile. The side of me that writes poems, lyrics, songs, web pages, and thinks about the philosophical debates of our time. The side of me that loves to play video games, watch cheesy movies, and sit in the rain. The side of me that becomes deeply depressed at the drop of a hat. I pause for a brief instant and now decide that this is not just a side of me....it is me.

As far as the statement of being a novelty goes I will now explain. Without sounding concieted I would first like to say that I don't consider myself to be a bad looking guy. Hell, some people may even find me attractive. This opens the floodgates to the pain that sometimes inhabits my life.

As far as the female species is concerned, or as far as the girls I date are concerned, I am undiscovered country. I am someone that presents a new mystery and\or new chalenge for them to conquor. I think as far as the preppy, dare I say shallow, girls that I seem to encounter and date, I am the guy that makes them feel a little rebellious. Like a gift at Spencers. The thing that makes them feel a little dirty, a little free spirited, and a little daring. They wonder what it's like to date someone who goes against the normal every day things in their lives. Since, like I said before, I'm not a bad looking guy and the girls I date can settle with me in order to satisfy their curiosity. I also think that the girls I date think that how I portray myself is just an act. They want to find out if how I look and act in public is a direct representation of the real me. Soon however, they find out that I don't put on false fronts and they soon hate the world they have stepped into. They can hardly believe that some people don't fit the everyday mold of society. And just like the gag gift you get on your birthday from the guy you invited because he overheard you planning a party, I get lost among the new and more polished toys.

Perhaps one day this diamond in the rough will finnaly meet someone who understands his un-orthodox ways. Either that or I'm just going to be passed from person to person for the remainder of my years. I just happen to not be a quitter....it comes with the wallet chain.

Awwwh! Poor little flourescent haired Troll Doll...
No way man, I always leave the coconut candies in my box of chocolates...

Email: goldenma@aol.com