Male Phrases

HOW TO TALK ABOUT MEN AND STILL BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

He does not have a BEER GUT
He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY

He is not QUIET
He is a CONVERSATIONAL MINIMALIST

He is not STUPID
He suffers from MINIMAL CRANIAL DEVELOPMENT

He does not get LOST ALL THE TIME
He discovers ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS

He is not BALDING
He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION

He is not a CRADLE ROBBER
He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS

He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK
He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL

He does not have HIS HEAD UP HIS @$$
He suffers from RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION

He is not SHORT
He is ANATOMICALLY COMPACT

He does not have a RICH DADDY
He is a RECIPIENT OF PARENTAL ASSET INFUSION

He does not constantly TALK ABOUT CARS
He has a VEHICULAR ADDICTION

He does not have a HOT BODY
He is PHYSICALLY COMBUSTIBLE

He is not UNSOPHISTICATED
He is SOCIALLY CHALLENGED

He does not EAT LIKE A PIC
He suffers from REVERSE BULIMIA

He is not a BAD DANCER
He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN

He is not a SEX MACHINE
He is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED

He does not HOG THE BLANKETS
He is THERMALLY UNAPPRECIATIVE

He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG
He has SWINE EMPATHY

He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES
He has an INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MOMENT

He is not AFRAID OF COMMITMENT
He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED