Turd
“Daddy's Little Girl”
By Bane Backbreaker
                                                                                                                                                                                                      
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    Survivor is an exciting show.  It’s quite exciting and dramatic.   What I like most about Survivor are the cutthroat tactics and physical competition.   On the other hand, Family Guy is great comedy.  That show has me on the floor laughing sometimes.    I like watching Monday Night Football on ABC also.   Choices, choices, choices......yes folks these are some of the many choices I have ANYTIME STEPHANIE MCMAHON TALKS ON TELEVISION!  I know that in my last "Turd Of The Month" column, I talked about how horrible Chyna's voice was....but Steph is annoying in quite a different way.  Chyna has a skin crawling, erection shriveling screech.   Stephanie McMahon's voice is causes blood to pour from my ears as I roll on the ground in a seizure.   For your own safety folks.....it’s best to change the channel when she speaks.
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    When Stephanie started out in the WWF she was simply a silent hostage of the Undertaker.  That was cool.  Then came the marriage angle.....thats when I started to worry.   When Steph started accompanying HHH down the ring, I knew that we were in trouble.  Who ever said that needed "Stephanifaction"?  The serious tragedy in my rant is that Steph's airtime prevented so many deserving wrestlers from being seen.  Think how little of Kane, Hurricane, Bob Holly, Al Snow and Raven is actually seen now.   Why is this chick on tv?  She has absolutely no wrestling ability and no drawing power.   In a perfect world, she would be backstage curling Lita's hair or painting Trish Stratus' nails.  
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    The scariest thing about Stephanie is the fact that she is immune from firing.  She does not have to "get on her knees" backstage to keep her job(although I am sure she has).   Her "daddy" apparently wants her to be a household name.  Stephanie Mac now has a nice, new set of  38 DD jigglies.  I can tell by the appearance that Vince bought the best implants that money can buy.   I expect to see Vince pimp her off in Playboy within the next two years.  Although that would be refreshing, I still would not want to see the howling witch of Connecticut on television every week.  We can only hope that she takes a chairshot one day that changes her mind about her "wrestling career".-Bane
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