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Empire Records

Transcribed by: Sonja


(Exterior shot of Empire Records, a music store. Cut to an office inside. A young man, Lucas, is sitting in the office. A young girl, Gina, comes to the door looking for the boss.)
Gina: Joe?
Lucas: Gina.
Gina: Lucas? What are you doing in here?
Lucas: My life has reached it's pinnacle ... Joe's letting me close the store tonight.
Gina: You're kidding?
Lucas: I am not.
Gina: Big responsibility Lucas.
Lucas: Yes. But Joe's rules are extremely simple. Count the money twice. Keep my hands off his beer, cigars, and drumsticks.
Gina: My, my, how will you remember it all? Good luck...don't screw it up…(she leaves)
Lucas: (to camera) A responsibility like this requires the obedience of a saint.
(Shot of Lucas drinking a beer, smoking a cigar, and playing the drums. Later Lucas is sitting at the desk counting the money. He opens the drawer for something and spots what looks like a contract. He pulls it out and looks at it.)
Lucas: Music Town franchise Option Agreement? They gotta be kidding. (to camera) In the immortal words of the Doors: "The time to hesitate is through".

(Atlantic City)
(Lucas is riding his motorcycle through the city looking for a promising casino.)

(Casino)
(Lucas is walking through a casino.)
Roulette Employee: No more bets. (spins the wheel)
Lucas: 22. (keeps walking)
Roulette Employee: 22 black.
Gambler: Who was that?
Craps Employee: Bets, end of roll. New roller. Place your bets please ladies and gentlemen. Place your bets down. (Lucas walks up and slaps down the money from Empire.) We have a high roller.
Lucas: $9104. I counted it ... twice.
Woman: I like your style.
Lucas: Well Joe told me to count it twice.
Craps Employee: No more bets please ladies and gentlemen. Place your bets down, place your bets down.
Lucas: So do I just throw it and get a seven?
Craps Employee: That would be very good sir.
Woman: Feeling lucky?
Lucas: I'm guided by a force much greater than luck. (rolls the dice)
Craps Employee: Seven! A winner!
Woman: Baby, you are sex.
Lucas: I know…
Craps Employee: Same lucky shooter, put your bets down ladies and gentlemen. Hot shooter on the line.
Lucas: You know what? Let it ride.
Craps Employee: Hot dice coming out.
Man: That's an $18000 bet. You sure you know what you're doing kid?
Lucas: I know this: That if I win this roll I will save the place that I work from being sold, and the jobs of my friends that work there. Thus striking a blow at all that is evil and making this world a better place to live in.
Woman: Huh?
Lucas: And I'll buy you guys a drink.
Gamblers: Oh...
Craps Employee: No more bets ladies and gentlemen, get your bets down.
Lucas: Joe, this one's for you. (rolls the dice)
Craps Employee: Two. Craps. End of roll.
Woman: You know something? You used to be cute.
Man: And you used to have nine thousand bucks.
Lucas: (pondering) I wonder if I'll be held responsible for this?

(Empire Records - Morning)
(Lucas is asleep on his motorcycle. AJ and Mark walk up to him.)
AJ: Lucas! Hey, Lucas? Hey, Lucas? (Lucas wakes up) What the hell you doing here, man?
Lucas: Something happened to me last night. In Atlantic City.
AJ: Oh, you went to Atlantic City?
Mark: Wow ... did you win anything?
Lucas: No. I did not win. So if you guys ever wonder if it was nice to know you, I tell you now that it was.
AJ: Shit, man. What happened? What happened?
Lucas: I do not regret the things that I have done but those I did not do. (starts his bike and rides off)
AJ: Lucas, how much? How much? Shit!
Mark: AJ, what do you mean by shit? What's up, huh?
AJ: Well Lucas doesn't have any money and Joe let him close the store last night.
Mark: So? Heh heh. (realizes) Oh. Huh. I guess he didn't live up to the responsibility of the position did he?
AJ: No, not the full responsibility.
Mark: Oh, yeah.
AJ: Uh-oh shut up. (Joe, the boss, arrives and gets out of his car and goes to open the front doors.) Hey what's up Joe?
Mark: Hey, Joe. What's up with the 'boss' threads, man?
Joe: Friggin' Rex Manning Day.
Mark: What's up with the hostility Joe?
AJ: (singing while walking into the store) Say no more, mon amour...
Mark: (singing while walking into the store) Lips are for kissing baby je t'adore.
(As they enter the store the phone starts ringing.)
Joe: Mark! ... Phone.
Mark: Oh, oh. (answers the phone) Empire Records open til midnight this is Mark ... Yeah. (to Joe) Hey, it's the bank. (hands Joe the phone and picks up the other line that's begun to ring)
Joe: (into phone) Yeah it's Joe ... are you sure?
Mark: (into phone) Empire ... oh sorry. Empire Records open til midnight this is Mark. (to Joe) The Boss.
Joe: (into phone) Give me a sec would you. (changes lines) Yeah, Mitch. Mitch! Mitch will you stop yelling please.
(Mark heads for the break room.)

(Break room)
(The break room is quite large. It's actually the back room of the store. There is a couch and two chairs. There are pigeon holes for the gang to put their stuff while they work. There is a table in the back right next to the doors that lead outside. Next to the doors on the other side are stairs that lead up to the roof. Off to the right is Joe's office, and to the left is the bathroom. AJ is pacing trying to figure out what to say to Joe.)
AJ: What is wrong Joe? ... Joe, what is it? ... Nah, Lucas? No way, c'mon.
Mark: (entering) Here he comes.
(Joe enters and goes into his office. He opens the safe and looks inside.)
Joe: Damn it, Lucas!
AJ: What's the matter Joe?

(Corey's House)
(Gina is sitting in her car waiting for Corey to get in. Corey is carrying her books, her purse, a cupcake, and a record.)
Corey: Surprise.
Gina: What? What is it?
Corey: Happy Rex Manning Day. (gives Gina the cupcake)
Gina: When did you have time to make these?
Corey: Dad says there's 24 usable hours in every day. Thank you.
Gina: You absolutely amaze me. You are a nerd.
Corey: That's me.
Gina: So?
Corey: So.
Gina: So?
Corey: So...
Gina: SO?
Corey: So today, I will offer myself to Rex Manning.
Gina: Alright! Yes.
Corey: (kisses her Rex Manning record) Oh I love you.
Gina: No. (grabs the record) Like this. (she tongues the record)
Corey: Get your tongue off my record. (They both laugh.) You think Rex is the right guy for my first time?
Gina: Oh, I think he's perfect for you Corey.

(Empire Records)
(Joe is looking for something in the break room. AJ comes up to him.)
AJ: Hey, Joe?
Joe: Yeah?
AJ: I need to ask you something.
Joe: Uh-huh.
AJ: Now I know you know a lot about love and women and all that sort of thing.
Joe: Oh yeah. My wife left me for another woman and my girlfriend forced me to leave at gunpoint. Does this qualify me?
AJ: Oh yeah, definitely. Look Joe, I've decided that today's the day I'm gonna tell Corey how I feel about her.
Joe: Uh-huh.
AJ: No. I know what you're thinking but I really am. I mean I've been working here off and on for five years, man, so ... I've gotta tell her how I feel, you know? I've gotta tell her that I, er ... well you know, that I er ...
Joe: Love her?
AJ: Yeah. Now how do I do that?
Joe: You say "I love you" ... what do you want? Written instructions? (looking around the room) If I find that kid, I swear, I swear I am gonna kill him.
AJ: OK ... I'm gonna tell her this morning.
Joe: Good.
AJ: By noon ... definitely.
Joe: Right.
AJ: No, by noon or one.
Joe: Uh-huh.
AJ: By 1:37 exactly, Joe.
Joe: Well good luck.
AJ: Well thank you.

(Out Back)
(Gina and Corey pull up in the rear of the store.)
Both: (singing) Don't be sad girl ... Just be glad girl ... You're not a bad girl!
Corey: God, remember the first time he sung it on 'The Family Way'?
Gina: Yeah.
Corey: I got so excited I almost choked on a pretzel.
(They reach the back door but before they can go in, the door opens and AJ comes out.)
Corey and Gina: Oh!
Corey: Happy Rex Manning Day.
AJ: You guys can't go in there right now. I got something to tell you. Both of you, listen. It's really crazy news.
Gina: What?
AJ: Alright ...

(Time Lapse)
(Joe is in his office trying to reach Lucas on the phone.)
Joe: Come on Lucas, pick up the phone. Pick it up ... come on, buckethead!
(AJ, Corey, and Gina enter the break room from the back door.)
Gina: Hi, Joe.
Corey: (quietly to AJ) Does Joe know?
AJ: No. So just act normal.
Corey: Hi, Joe.
AJ: What's up, Joe?
Gina: What's new, Joe?
Corey: How ya doin'?
Joe: Damn!

(Time Lapse)
(Gina runs up the stairs in the front of the store. She has a bag of M&M's in her hand. She dumps some out and holds up one. Mark, AJ, and Corey each have an M&M. Whoever has the color Gina holds out gets to pick the first CD of the day.)
Gina: OK. Let's see who goes first. I got a brown, anybody got brown?
Mark: Brown?
AJ: No.
Gina: (holds up another) Orange.
(Mark holds up his orange M&M.)
AJ: Aw, shit.
Gina: Oh, no.
(Mark runs over to the CD player while Corey throws her M&M at him.)
Mark: Nah-nah.
(Mark puts in a CD. The music plays while we see a montage of the gang getting ready for the store to open. Gina dusting the records, Corey making coffee, AJ and Mark setting up for Rex Manning day. Finally AJ can't take anymore of the music and so he pulls the plug.)
Mark: (coming over) Hey ... whatcha' doin', man?
AJ: I'm exercising my veto, man.
Mark: Yeah but it's only 9 o'clock. You sure you wanna do that?
AJ: Mark, listening to this crap is guaranteed to make you sterile.
Mark: Maybe I wanna be sterile.
(Mark walks off and AJ takes the CD and uses his lighter to burn the bottom of it so it won't play anymore.)

(Break Room)
(Joe comes out of his office and looks around. He spots Corey at a table doing her homework.)
Joe: Corey, what are you doing here?
Corey: Calculus. I hate it but my dad says I've gotta get an A.
Joe: No, I mean you know you're not on till this afternoon, right?
Corey: (smiles) Joe, it's Rex Manning Day.
Joe: Rex Manning Day ...
(Cut to a shot of Rex's music video.)
Mark: (singing) Lips are for kissing baby so say no more.
Joe: Could you please not sing, Mark.
Mark: You know what Joe? One of these days I'm gonna show you little people.
Joe: Yeah well on that day I'm gonna jump out of my wheelchair and do a dance.
Mark: How about today, huh? Rex Manning Day. (notices Lucas entering) Uh oh.
Lucas: (carrying a bowl of quarters under his arm) Mark.
Mark: Lucas.
Joe: Lucas…
Lucas: Joe…
Joe: Where's the money?
Lucas: Joe, the money is gone.
Joe: Yeah I know it's gone. Where's it gone to?
Lucas: Atlantic City.
Joe: Atlantic City?
Lucas: Yeah.
Joe: Is it coming back from Atlantic City?
Lucas: Er, I don't think so Joe.
Joe: What's it doing in Atlantic City?
Lucas: (like it's obvious) Re-circulating.
Joe: Re-circulating? (knocks the quarters out of Lucas's hands)
Lucas: Uh-oh. Are you pissed off, Joe?
Joe: Lucas.
Lucas: Joe.
Joe: Lucas.
Lucas: Joe.
Joe: Lucas, listen to me. I told Mitchell Beck that you forgot to deposit the money. I told Mitchell that the money was still here.
Lucas: Joe, that's not true. It's in Atlantic City I swear.
Joe: Shut up. Shut up, sit down and don't you move. (shoves him down onto the couch)
Lucas: It could be in other cities by now…
Joe: Oh shut up! Under no circumstances do I want you to leave that couch. Unless it's to bring me $9000 and then you bring it here to me, OK?
Lucas: Joe. I think it's going to be OK.
Joe: What makes you think that?
Lucas: Who knows where thoughts come from. They just appear ... uh-huh.
Joe: (walking back to his office) What a moron.

(Cashier Desk)
Florist: (to Corey) You Corey Mason?
Corey: For me?
Florist: Uh-hmm.
Corey: Oh wow! Thank you.
Florist: Uh-hmm ... later.
Corey: Yeah, bye. Thank you.
Gina: (reading the card) "To the number one in her class, Harvard 1999. Make me proud, love Daddy". That's sweet.
Corey: God, nothing's ever enough for him, huh?
Gina: Aw, no I'm sure he didn't mean it like that. No he didn't, I'm sure he didn't mean it like that.
Customer: Er, excuse me?
Corey: (to customer) Hi. How are you today?

(Outside)
(Mark is cleaning up outside. There is a large painting of Madonna on the wall. Mark gives in and kisses the wall just as Deb arrives. Cut to Deb entering the store and walking past Corey and Gina.)
Corey: Hi Debra.
(Deb gives her the finger and keeps on walking.)
Corey: She hates me.
Gina: She hates me too. But I have enough sense to hate her back.

(Break Room)
(Lucas is still sitting on the couch. Deb walks in.)
Lucas: Morning Deb.
AJ: Hi Deb.
(Deb doesn't say anything. She goes directly into the bathroom and shuts the door.)
Joe: (coming in from his office) Lucas are in trouble? Did you need the money? Because if you are in trouble you can talk to me, you know that right?
Lucas: Joe, we're all in in some kind of trouble. Am I the only one who sees it? You know, Deb's in trouble and AJ's in trouble.
AJ: AJ's not in trouble.
Lucas: And Corey is in trouble.
AJ: Corey's not in trouble - she's going to Harvard.
Lucas: Mark's in trouble, Eddie's in trouble…
Joe: Hey, I'm the one who's in trouble here. Cause every minute that goes by and I don't call the cops, I look like a bigger banana-head.
Lucas: Joe, I can categorically say that you are not a bigger banana-head.
Joe: You screwed me Lucas, you know that right? What do you want me to do? Call Mitchell, tell him I lied?
Lucas: It seems like a viable option.
Joe: I swear to God if you are fooling with me I will kill you.
Lucas: Hmm.
Joe: AJ, I need another closer.
AJ: Joe, I opened, man.
Joe: C'mon, look I wouldn't ask but I have got no choice.
Lucas: I can close.
AJ: Yeah, I can close. It's cool. They just raised my rent so I could definitely use the money.
Lucas: Well damn the man.
Joe: (going back into his office) Oh God, I am in hell!

(Bathroom)
(Deb is cutting off all of her hair. When she's done she's got a very short buzz cut.)

(Break Room)
(AJ is gluing the quarters to the floor.)
AJ: Lucas, do you think that it's possible for someone to be in love with someone else and not even know it?
Lucas: In this life, there are nothing but possibilities.
AJ: Well that's good 'cause I have to tell Corey I love her by 1:37.
Lucas: That's an excellent time.
(Deb comes out of the bathroom.)
AJ: Wow ... You did have hair when you went in there right?
Deb: Yeah, it's still in the sink if you want to glue it ... Hey, Lucas is it true you committed the perfect crime?
Lucas: Not entirely perfect.
AJ: (spots the bandage on Deb's wrist) You see that, man? (gets up and goes over to Deb) Hey Debra wait a minute. What's with you today?
Deb: Bad hair day.
AJ: No I mean with this. (grabs her wrist and holds it up) What is this, huh? What happened?
Deb: You know I went to Rock and Roll Heaven and I wasn't on the guest list. Now please move, I've gotta go to work.
AJ: No. Now you tell me what is going on.
Deb: I decided I'd rather kill myself than meet Rex Manning. Now excuse me I'm going.
AJ: No listen to me. This isn't funny. I'm not joking. I'm not gonna let you go out of here until you tell me what's going on.
Deb: Mind your own business.
Lucas: She's fine. She's amazing.
Deb: Thank you. (she goes to the front of the store)
Lucas: (whispering) AJ she's in the store. She's gonna be OK.
AJ: What's with you? Yesterday you were normal and today you're like the Chinese Guy from the Karate Kid. What's with you today?
Lucas: What's with today, today?
AJ: I dunno.

(Cashier Desk)
Corey: Oh, wow ... Why'd you do that?
Deb: Just your typical nutty teenager in America. Oh! Before you guys hear all about it. (shows off her wrist like it's a prize)
Corey: That's supposed to be a joke right?
Deb: No, you're the joke.
(Corey leaves.)
Gina: Well Sinead O'Rebellion. Shock me, shock me, shock me with that deviant behavior.
Deb: That is so clever. I swear to God you get smarter the shorter your skirt gets.
Gina: And you get smarter the shorter your hair gets so it's probably a good thing you went with that.
Deb: Yeah.
Gina: It's a wonderful look for you darling.
Deb: Thank you.
(Mark has put on another Heavy Metal CD.)

(Break Room)
Lucas: Joe? ... Joe? ... I have to go the bathroom.
Joe: (into phone) Yeah, I wanna report a robbery. No I will not hold.

(The Store)
(Mark puts in another heavy metal CD. A lot of the customers start a small mosh pit. Gina tries to work her way over to the CD player to turn off the music. She's getting knocked around from every side.)
Gina: Veto. Excuse me, ow. Excuse me. Ow ... Veto!
Mark: Hey, hey, hey, hey. What's up with that Gina, huh?
Gina: You know it's too early. It makes the customers all crazy-like. (walks off)
Mark: That's the whole point ... (Eddie walks up) Eddie...
Eddie: Fat Cat. What's up dude? I heard your music playing when I got in, man. That's some pretty scary stuff.
Mark: Yeah, it was moshy.
Eddie: I'm glad to say I made you a tape last night for educational purposes. Well here's the deal, man. You start off with a little classical music, a little pooky, a little puffy. And then you got some shags on there and residents. A little Floyd and Zeppelin.
Mark: Floyd's very cool.
Eddie: And another very cool thing is: I made you these. Now they're my special recipe and you know what that means - lots a sugar. Now Mark, you gotta understand something here. This music is the glue of the World, Mark - it holds it all together, without this life would be meaningless.
Mark: Dude, have you heard about Lucas?

(Break Room)
(Lucas is still on the couch. Eddie walks in.)
Eddie: Hey Lucas, man. I heard you like went to Vegas and like married a mobster's wife, and now you've like got a hit on you and stuff. Is that true?
Lucas: Not entirely true.
Eddie: Oh, well, outlaw man. We salute you.
Lucas: Thank you Eddie.
Eddie: No problem.
Gina: (over PA) This song goes out to our employee of the week: Lucas.
Eddie: Oh, a little tribute, man.
('I Want Money' begins to play.)
Gina: (over PA) Lucas wants money ... Lots a money ... Joe's money.
(Joe comes out of his office with a box. He begins to hand out Music Town info to everyone.)
Corey: What the hell's this Joe?
AJ: Rules and standards for Music Town employee conduct?
Joe: (to Eddie) Put these in the boxes.
AJ: Music Town? We're not a Music Town.
Joe: No we're not a Music Town ... yet.
Mark: Well isn't Music Town a chain, Joe?
AJ: (reading from rules) "No gum chewing will be allowed inside the store".
Eddie: You're turning us into a Music Town?
Mark: Why didn't you tell us?
Joe: 'Cause I was trying to stop it.
Corey: What do you mean?
Joe: Look, I got together enough money to make Mitch an offer. He's gonna make me a partner. I could of bought him out eventually.
Corey: You were gonna buy Empire?
Mark: That's a good thing, right?
AJ: That'd be fantastic.
All: Yeah.
Joe: You think it's gonna happen now? I have to pat for what Mr. Brilliant here did. It's over kids, OK.
Lucas: Mitchell is "the man" Joe.
Joe: Yeah, and the man calls all the shots.
Lucas: Damn the man!
Joe: Let me explain it to you. Mitchell's the man, I'm the idiot, you're the screw-up, and we are all losers. Welcome to Music Town.

(The Store - the Cashier Desk)
(Deb and Gina are reading the Music Town employee conduct sheet.)
Deb: (reading) "No visible tattoos".
Gina: (reading)"No revealing clothing".
Deb: We're both screwed. (pause) At least you're used to it.
Gina: Now Debra don't be bitter. Certainly with your ever-growing collection of flesh-mutilating silver appendages, and your brand new, neo-nazi boot-camp makeover, the boy's will come a running.
Deb: Let's not fight - let's just rip.
(They both proceed to rip up the conduct sheet.)

(The Stairs)
Mark: No, we mustn't dwell. No, not today. We can't .... Not on Rex Manning Day.
(Shot of everyone getting the store ready for Rex Manning. Shot of the fans lining up outside. Shot of a teenage boy shoplifting some CD's.)

(Break Room)
Lucas: (stands up but keeps his foot on the couch) Joe is it OK if I leave the couch? 'Cause I'm gonna leave the couch now, OK? My ass is falling asleep Joe, I gotta go. (picks up a couch cushion) I'm leaving...

(The Store)
(Lucas walks in from the break room carrying the couch cushion.)
Mark: Well at least you didn't leave the couch.
Lucas: Not the whole couch.
Mark: Oh! I've decided I'm gonna start a band.
Lucas: Really?
Mark: Yeah.
Lucas: The first thing you need is a name - and then you'll know what kind of band you've got.
Mark: Yeah, I know, I know. I was kinda thinking about "Marc". What do you think of that?
Lucas: Is that with a 'C' or with a 'K'?
Mark: Well, um, my name is with (checks name tag) ... a 'K'. So, I was thinking maybe my band could by with a 'C'. So that way it's kinda like that psychedelic, you know, trip thing.
Lucas: Always play with their minds. (goes over to the shoplifter) Nice selection.
Shoplifter: What?
Lucas: Help you with anything?
Shoplifter: No. I'm alright thanks.
Lucas: You like music?
Shoplifter: Yeah.
Lucas: Me too. (whispering) The fat man walks alone.
Shoplifter: What? Stop. What are you, some kind of weirdo?
Lucas: That's a big coat you're wearing, lots of pocket-room.
Shoplifter: Yeah ... see ya. (walks out of the store)
Lucas: I'm sure I'll bump into you. (takes off toward the back of the store and heads up the stairs)
Mark: (yelling) SHOPLIFTER!!!!
(Cut to shots of Lucas chasing after the shoplifter. The kid runs back through the store. Gina and Deb watch him go by.)
Gina: Isn't it customary to leave the scene after committing the crime?
Deb: Definitely an amateur.
Gina: (over PA) Attention Rex Manning fans. If you look to your left you will notice a shoplifter being chased by night manager Lucas. This young man will be caught and deep-fried in a vat of hot oil and served to our first 100 customers. Just another tasty treat from the gang at Empire Records.
(Lucas continues to go after the shoplifter. He finally catches him when the kid runs into a car door.)
Shoplifter: Oh, shit.

(Out Back)
(Rex Manning and his assistant, Jane, pull up behind Empire Records. Rex is complaining about his haircut.)
Rex: He cut it too short.
Jane: No it's fine, really. It's fabulous.
Rex: Oh, God.
Jane: What?
Rex: Look at this place.
Jane: Come on Rex. There is no gig too small, alright. Middle America buys your records, now come on, we got a lot of fans waiting in there.

(Break Room)
Joe: (on phone) Yeah this is Joe Reeves from the Empire Records store. We have a shoplifter in custody ... uh-huh. How old are you?
Shoplifter: Old enough to kick your nuts through your skull and splatter you brains on the wall.
Joe: (into phone) Yeah, he's a juvenile.
Lucas: (hitting shoplifter) No.
Joe: (hangs up the phone) What's your name?
Shoplifter: Warren Beatty.
Joe: OK, Warren stand up. I want you to hold these against your chest, stand against the wall and they're gonna take a photograph of you.
Warren: Why don't you shove 'em up your ass?
Lucas: Because it would hurt a lot Warren.
Joe: Take him over there.
(Gina comes out from the bathroom wearing nothing but a Music Town smock.)
Gina: And they said no revealing clothing, didn't they? I think Music Town is actually torn on the revealing clothing issue. I think so.
Corey: (turning on music and dancing) Revealing clothing...
Joe: Gina .... Gina .... Gina .... Gina! ... Gina will you please get dressed. Corey turn that down, AJ up on the roof, fix the sign. Lucas - take the photograph.
Gina: Yes. Music Town. I can work for Music Town.
(Rex and Jane enter from the back door.)
Jane: Hello?
Gina: (comes over to them) Hi. Welcome to Music Town. May I service you?
Joe: Gina get dressed. Corey - work.
Jane: You must be Joe Reeves.
Joe: Yeah. I'm Joe, you must be Jane, right?
Jane: Hi.
Warren: Me Joe, you Jane.
AJ: (smacks Warren) Shut up, Warren.
Jane: This is Rex Manning.
Joe: It's a pleasure to meet you. We all love the new album.
Rex: Oh, good for you.
Warren: What's he doing here?
Joe: Just let me introduce you to everybody. This is Gina, this is Corey, Lucas, AJ, and er, Warren.
(AJ squeezes Warren's neck.)
Warren: Hi.
Rex: I'm Rex. Great to be here.
Corey: I have all your albums.
Rex: That's terrific Corey. Thank you.
Lucas: Hey, Rex, what happened to your hair?
Rex: Well, the er, stylist - if you can call him that - got a little carried away. No biggy.
Lucas: It looks good.
Jane: See, he likes it.
Corey: I, I like it.
Rex: Great, let's go to work.
(Cut to AJ taking pictures of Warren with the stolen CD's. Rex manages to step in for a few of the photos.)
AJ: That was fabulous Warren, thank you.

(The Store)
(Rex comes out of the back and the fans go crazy.)
Jane: Just smile alright.
Rex: I don't like the chair.
Jane: What do you mean, you don't like the chair?
Rex: I don't like the chair.
Jane: What's wrong with the chair? Just sit in the chair.
Rex: I don't want to sit.
Jane: Are you just gonna stand there?
Joe: (replacing chair) Mr. Manning, this is a very nice chair.
Rex: Thank you Joseph. (sits down)
Jane: (to Joe) Thank you.
(Rex snaps his fingers for a pen and Jane tosses one onto the table. Rex motions for the first woman in line to come forward.)
Fan: Hi.
Rex: Hi. What's your name?
Fan: Kathy. K-AT-H-Y.
Rex: Ok.
Kathy: You know, I've seen every episode of 'The Family Way'.
Rex: Oh yeah?
Kathy: And you were my favorite singer in high school.
Rex: Who's your favorite singer now?
Kathy: You - it's still you.
Rex: Bye.

(Break Room)
(AJ is working on his drawing. Warren and Lucas are sitting on the couch. Warren is playing with a magnet. Mark enters in a hurry.)
Mark: There's so many babes out there. I gotta get Rex some water because Rex is very, very thirsty.
Jane: Make sure it's bottled water.
Lucas: Mark.
Mark: Yeah?
Lucas: Who's your favorite singer?
Mark: Axel.
Lucas: Well if Axel Rose was driving down the highway and saw Rex Manning stranded on the side of the road, you think Axel Rose would stop and help him?
Mark: (thinks) Does Axel have a jack?
Warren: No way, man. Axel would spin the wheel, take aim, pound on the gas, and take that sucker out!
(Mark looks a little shocked at Warren's hostility.)
Lucas: Warren. Warren! Where do you get this hostility from?

(Time Lapse)
(Warren is now sitting on the floor trying to get the quarters off the carpet.)
Warren: Who glued these quarters down?
AJ: I did.
Warren: What the hell for, man?
AJ: I don't feel that I need to explain my art to you, Warren.
Lucas: Warren, look what you took. (sifts through stolen CDs) Rap, metal, rap, metal, Whitney Houston.
Warren: It's for my girlfriend, OK.
Lucas: Sure it is. You know, someone like you needs to diminish their criminal impulses, not magnify them. Maybe some Jazz or some Classical.
Warren: Maybe you bite me.
Jane: Do any of you, er, like Rex Manning's new record? (Warren laughs) What?
Warren: Dance-party-USA-teeny-bopper type of shit right?
Jane: I don't know, actually it tested well among teenage males.
Lucas: Jane, did you compare the percentage of teenage male Rex Manning fans to the incidents of homosexuality among teenage males?
(Warren laughs again at this.)
Jane: No.

(The Store)
(A teenage girl is now at the autograph table.)
Rex: Who should I make it out to?
Girl: Denise.
Rex: Denise. I've always loved that name.
Girl: Thank you, but it's not mine, it's my mom's. She loves you, I've never even heard of you.
Rex: OK. Tell me, does you mother still have her own teeth? Forget it.
Girl: Cool hair.
Rex: Oh.
(The girl walks off and the next fan in line is a very old woman.)
Old Fan: (singing) Say no more mon amour. Say no more mon amour. Say no more, MON AMOUR. SAY ... NO ... MORE ....
(Mark claps when she's done.)

(Break Room)
(Burko enters.)
Lucas: Burko.
Burko: Lucas, I heard a story about you.
Lucas: Really. Which one?
Burko: The one where you stole $9000, went to Atlantic City, and there's a contract out on you. Hey, has anyone seen Debra today?
AJ: Yeah, we saw her. She shaved her head. And she has a bandage on her wrist.
Burko: Really?
AJ: Really.
Burko: (to Jane) Who're you?
Jane: I'm Jane.
Burko: Oh.
Jane: I, er, work for Rex Manning.
Burko: (fighting back a laugh) Oh.
(All the guys start laughing.)
Jane: You think that's funny, huh?
(They continue laughing.)
Jane: (continuing) If you'll excuse me.

(Time Lapse)
(Jane is in Joe's office. She's just told him that she's gonna quit.)
Joe: You're quitting? You can't quit.
Jane: Oh, it's not them, it's Rex. You know, I don't even like his music.
Joe: Come on Jane, you gotta stay.
Jane: I need a change of scenery.
Joe: Honey, come on, you can't do it to the - (his office door shuts in his face) I can't believe it - she quit.
(Cut to Joe putting a CD in the CD player. He grabs his drum sticks and goes over to his drum kit and begins playing. Lucas hits the intercom button on the phone and then hangs the phone outside Joe's office so that the whole store can hear the music. Everyone sings along.)
Corey & Gina: (singing) If you want blood, you got it.
(Mitch, the man, enters the store.)
Mitch: Excuse me ladies, there should be more selling, thank you.
Gina: (over PA) Guess who's here. (The music immediately cuts off.)
Mitch: (to Rex) How are you? Mitchell Beck - I own this place.
Rex: Oh, good to meet you. You have a nice store.
Mitch: Oh, nice of you to say. I'll tell you though, you should of seen it originally: Beck's Bath and Bidet, bathroom emporium. My grandfather started it. It was my beatnik father who turned it into a record store. I tell you, if I was selling toilets today, I'd be a rich man.
(Joe enters from the back.)
Mitch: (continuing) Joe. What's the matter with you? You're sweating like a pig.
Joe: Well it's nice to see you too, Mitch.
Mitch: Joe, come on. Is this the way we treat Mr. Manning? Where's the fresh fruit, where's the champagne?
Rex: No, no, that's not necessary, thank you.
Mitch: No, no, please. (to Joe) He's a big star.
Joe: Big, hug star. Big, big.
Mitch: So let's get him some.
Joe: Sure.
Mitch: OK.
(Joe and Mitch go into the Break Room.)
Mitch: (continuing) Joe, I'm going by the bank so why don't you give me last night's deposit. I wanna make sure it gets there this time.
Joe: It's OK, I'll take care of it.
Mitch: No, no, you're a busy man, let me.
Joe: I said I'll handle it.
(Joe goes into the counting room. Mitch starts to follow but is sidetracked by Lucas.)
Lucas: Mitch! Mitch. Mitch. Have you met Warren?
Mitch: Who're you?
Lucas: Lucas. I work here.
(Shot of Joe filling an empty bank bag with paper to make it look like there's money inside. He then locks the bag and takes out the key.)
Lucas: (continuing) Have, er, you met Warren? Cause I, I wanted to talk to you about Warren. You see young Warren came into the store today and put on a little demonstration for all the store employees. Very motivational. It was inspiring actually. And gosh, he just made quite an impression on everyone.
Mitch: (sarcastic) I'm intrigued. I'm spellbound. (Joe walks over and hands him the bank bag.) Now that wasn't so hard was it? Thank you.
(Warren gives Mitch the finger.)

(The Store)
(Deb is working on something. Burko comes up behind her.)
Burko: (to Deb) I like you hair ... Are you OK?
Deb: Why do you care? You didn't care last night.
Burko: Yes I did.
Deb: Look this isn't about you, OK. I got home last night and I thought about everything that had happened. And then I thought about everything that had happened the night before that and the week before that, and the year before that. And, the only thing that was different was there was something else that was making me feel shitty.
Burko: I'm trying to say I'm sorry.
Deb: I just said this wasn't about you. Look, you didn't do anything wrong - I'm screwed up, OK?
Burko: We're all screwed up.
Deb: Don't touch me right now. I just want you to get up and I want you to walk away.
(Deb puts her headphones on and goes back to work as Burko walks away.)

(The Roof)
(AJ is practicing what he wants to say to Corey.)
AJ: Corey, I've gotta tell you something. It's about how I feel about you. I ... I, er, I really, really, really ... oh, god. You know that feeling you get when you get out a hot bath and you just feel really refreshed and nice? Well ... you make me feel like - you make me feel like a bath? Aw ... You're like vanilla ice cream - french vanilla ice cream - yeah.

(Break Room)
(The police have arrived for Warren.)
Warren: This is bullshit, man.
Lucas: The long arm of the law has embraced our dear friend Warren.
Joe: (to policewoman) I'm Joe Reeves the manager. Is everything OK?
Warren: This is such bullshit, man.
Cop: We've got everything under control.
Warren: Hey, Joe, Joe, tell them what he did.
Joe: Do you need a statement from me?
Cop: No, we already got one from Mr. Lucas.
Warren: Oh, oh, Mr. Lucas over there took $9000 and I just took a couple of CDs.
Cop: That is enough.
Warren: Come on. Lucas, I thought you were my friend.
Lucas: Take care of yourself Warren. Don't let the man get you down.
Joe: I don't wanna see you back in the store Warren.
Warren: I'm the victim here.
AJ: Bye, Warren.
Warren: (as he is dragged away) I'm gonna get you. I'm not playing this time. I'll be back and you'll be sorry! You're gonna pay for this...
Lucas: Woo!
AJ: (imitating Warren) You'll be sorry.
Joe: I'm already sorry.

(Time Lapse)
(Joe is now checking the music booths. There is one couple in there that's getting a little frisky. He motions through the door for them to cut it out. He kneels down to talk to Deb.)
Joe: Hi.
Deb: Hey. I'm just accumulating tax returns. I'm almost done.
Joe: Look , Deb, erm ... if you need to talk about anything ...
Deb: You gonna fix me Joe? OK, fix me, I'll listen.
Joe: Well I didn't mean that - I mean, should I call your mother or something? Or?
Deb: Great. You know, if you find her could you give me her number cos I'd really like to talk to her myself. ... I know you didn't mean anything.
Joe: You're doing a good job, Deb. (leaves)
Deb: I feel a lot better.

(Time Lapse)
(Joe is now in his office. Corey opens the door and comes in.)
Corey: Joe? You're the best boss in the world. Can I bring Rex his lunch?
Joe: Burko's taking him his lunch.
Corey: Um, Joe, you know that Burko's going to insult him right to his face - I don't think that's such a good idea.
Joe: Look, I don't care if Burko sticks an M80 up his butt and lights it. In fact I hope he sticks one up mine - it might be an improvement.
Corey: Joe, I have to bring Rex his lunch.
Joe: Burko is.
Corey: Joe, I need to bring Rex his
lunch.
Joe: Burko is. Corey: I'M BRINGING REX HIS LUNCH!!!
Joe: (thinks) All right.
Corey: Thanks Joe. Thanks a lot.

(Small Break Room)
(Cut to Corey preparing Rex's lunch. She sets up the table real nice, and lights a candle. She's singing and dancing to a slow song but quickly stops when Rex and Mark enter the room.)
Mark: Wow, all the food groups, Corey.
Corey: Bye, Mark. (shoves him out the door)
Mark: Hey, hey, woah. (Corey shuts the door on him.)
Rex: Well this looks very elegant. Yeah, boy, talking to all those women can make you work up an appetite. (sits down at the table)
Corey: I bet it does.
Rex: I think I've got everything. I'm all set, thank you.
Corey: So am I.
Rex: You know I can't help notice you sitting there staring at me.
Corey: I was just thinking how I used to imagine marrying you when you were on 'The Family Way'.
Rex: Marrying me? You must've been a baby back then.
Corey: (taking off her top) I'm not a baby now.
Rex: You're a sweet girl.
Corey: (taking off her skirt) I'm not as sweet as you think.
Rex: How old are you?
Corey: Old enough.
Rex: You sure you wanna do this?
Corey: Yeah, definitely.
(Rex leans back in the chair and unzips his pants.)
Rex: Rock and roll.
(Corey looks shocked and runs out of the room pulling on her clothes.)

(The Roof)
(Corey comes out onto the roof while pulling on her top. She sits down and then spots AJ coming over to her.)
Corey: Go away.
AJ: Corey.
Corey: What are you doing here?
AJ: Fixing the sign. What are you doing?
Corey: Taking a break.
AJ: Wow, it's really weird that you just came up here. Look I really have to tell you something.
Corey: Not now, please.
AJ: No, it has to be now.
Corey: Please AJ, not now.
AJ: No, no, it has to be now, listen. You remember that really horrible day when Mark set off the store alarm, and, and, and Gina got dumped by that Dennis guy and cried all day, and I drew the picture of him and Lucas made the voodoo doll and you wore that skirt that I hate? Do you remember that day?
Corey: What skirt?
AJ: The, the one with the flowers.
Corey: The blue skirt?
AJ: Yeah, the blue one.
Corey: You hate…
AJ: Yeah, I hate that skirt. But it's good that I hate that skirt, Corey, cos that, listen, that, listen to me, that skirt made me realize that, I mean, if I can, I can love her in that skirt then this must really be it. Corey, I love you.
Corey: What?
AJ: Corey, I'm in love with you.
Corey: Oh wow. Please not now, please AJ. Please don't do this right now. I'm sorry but I can't handle this right now.
AJ: What are you telling me, that you could handle it some other time? Is that it?
Corey: Look, I just threw myself at Rex Manning, OK. I made a total fool out of myself, I mean, and I really don't…
AJ: You what?
Corey: Yes, and, and, I'm not ready for this OK? And I, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry ... I'm sorry, I just wanna be alone, OK?
AJ: Yeah, OK. Just forget I said anything alright. Just forget - I didn't say anything. Nothing happened. (walks off)

(Shot of AJ working on a painting.)

(Restaurant)
(Corey and Gina are having lunch. They are sitting outside at a table.)
Gina: Forget about Rex. We'll get you another guy.
Corey: (she takes off the red bra she borrowed from Gina and sets it on the table) I don't want another guy. I'm not like you, I don't need another guy. Why do you always try and make me like you?
Gina: What'd you mean 'like me'?
Corey: I'm not like you with guys. I don't need to do what you do all the time.
Gina: Oh, OK. I see. Not like me the turbo-slut, is that what you mean? What are you saying? That I gotta go do every guy that I see?
Corey: Well you certainly seem to enjoy it.
Gina: Huh. Well. What'd you do, huh Corey? Did you go over there and did you act all perfect and better than everybody? You think guys like you for that?
Corey: They may not like it, but at least they don't do it with me and go off and laugh.
Gina: Miss Self-righteous.
(Gina gets up and storms off as Eddie comes over and sits down.)
Eddie: (putting pizza on table) Here you are. Hey, is Rex Manning in yet? Cause if he is you gotta show him my eight track, it's so great, it's 'The Family Way'. It's in the, like, vinyl section, right underneath the -
Corey: Eddie, please. (leaves)
Eddie: Hey, what'd I do? Hey. (picks up bra) Hey, you forgot your thingy.

(Empire Records)
(Rex is still signing autographs. Gina is in the chair next to him and they are talking.)
Gina: I dunno, it's just something I've always been able to do. I can tell you what color and what kind.
Rex: Huh. Alright, what am I wearing now?
Gina: Jockeys. Navy blue. Am I right?
Rex: I dunno.
Gina: Well why don't you check it out, and you let me know.

(Count-Out Room)
(Gina enters and shuts the door behind her. A few seconds later Rex opens the door and comes in.)
Rex: Now the $64,000 question.
(Gina comes over to him and undoes his pants. They fall to the floor and she lifts up his shirt and admires his navy blue jockeys.)

(Out back)
(AJ is working on a painting. Corey comes outside.)
Corey: Hi. (looks at painting) That's really nice.
AJ: Don't.
Corey: Don't what?
AJ: Pretend like nothing happened. Just don't.
Corey: AJ, when you told me that before I just freaked because I don't think of you like that. I mean you're my best friend ... I think we have something better than that.
AJ: Better? That's bullshit. You know that's bullshit.
(AJ storms off. Corey takes a little while pill from a small container she's holding.)

(Shot of Deb making buttons.)

(The Store)
Deb: (handing button to Corey) One for Miss Teen America. It's OK, I didn't spit on it.
Corey: (takes the button and reads it) 'Dishonesty'? What's that supposed to mean?
Deb: (to Mark) And one for the man with the band.
Mark: Oh ... huh, huh. 'Marc sucks'. Yeah.
Deb: Hey, AJ. I made you a button. 'Stupid'.
AJ: Debra you're just in time.
Deb: What?
AJ: Please. Surprise.
(AJ turns on the CD player and it begins to play one of Rex's songs.)
Deb: Veto, veto, veto. I'm not listening to it.
AJ: No, we're dancing to it.
Deb: I'm not gonna dance to Rex Manning. I'm not dancing.
(AJ lies down on the counter.)
AJ: Why not? I am Rex Manning, I'm so sexy.
Deb: No you're stupid. Stupid.
AJ: No, I'm sexy. (he puts Deb's hand on his crotch)
Deb: Get off. (she shoves him off the counter)
(Everyone in the store begins to sing and dance. Shots of Gina and Rex gettin' it on the count-out room. Back in the store Joe comes down the stairs.)
Joe: You all having fun? I hope so. (everyone stops dancing) Don't let me stop you, keep dancin'. But you better do it now because by next week this is gonna be a Music Town and I don't think they allow dancing in Music Town.
Lucas: What are we supposed to do instead, Joe?
Joe: What am I gonna do with this guy, huh? What should I do? Turn him into the police, send him to jail? Who do you think that he's gonna come to when he wants bail, who? Me, right? Me. What should I do? Put in my own nine grand? And then I'm screwed.
Lucas: Don't worry Joe, you're a superb manager.
Joe: Really?
Lucas: Superb.
Joe: Keep it up, Lucas.
Lucas: Superb.
Joe: Say it again.
Lucas: Superb.
Joe: You little shit. (he grabs Lucas by the shoulder and drags Lucas to the break room.)
Lucas: Joe, that's my shoulder.

(Break Room)
(Joe comes in still dragging Lucas. He throws Lucas into his office.)
Joe: Get in there. (he slams the door shut)
(While Lucas shouts there are sounds of Joe beating the crap out of Lucas.)
Lucas: Joe? Joe. Joe, Joe, no don't. Aw ... Joe don't do it, don't do it, Joe. Ohhh ....
(The office door opens and Joe tosses Lucas back out into the main room.)
Joe: (handing Lucas a paper towel) You deserved that, you know it, right?
Lucas: I know it.
Joe: Where's Rex?
Deb: I got a better question for you Joe: Where's Gina?
(They hear laughter and noise coming from the count-out room. They all stare at the door for a minute.)
AJ: I'll look upstairs.
Deb: I'll check the bathroom.
Burko: I'll check the storage room.
Lucas: I'll check the sofa.
(Eddie walks in.)
Eddie: Hey, hey, how's it going, man? Joe, I'm sorry I'm late. I brought some pizza just in case anyone got hungry. So what's up, man? Why you guys, er, looking so glum? Where's sexy Rexy?
Deb: It's kinda funny that you put it that way.
Eddie: What?
(Corey enters carrying her cash drawer.)
Corey: Joe, I'm not feeling so good, can I count out now?
(She walks over to the count-out room and tries to go in, but the door is locked.)
Corey: Why's the door locked? Where's Gina? Where, where's Rex?
(Everyone avoids looking at her. She throws her cash drawer down as the door to the count-out room opens. Gina comes out followed by Rex.)
Rex: What? No applause?
(AJ launches himself at Rex and proceeds to beat on him.)
Rex: Get off.
(Joe and Corey grab AJ and try to pull him off.)
Joe: AJ!
Corey: AJ, stop. He's not worth it.
Joe: AJ.
(Between the two of them they manage to pull AJ off of Rex.)
Rex: (punching AJ while Joe restrains him) Wise up, junior.
Joe: (throwing Rex his things) Take your purse, and get the hell out of my store.
Rex: Where's Jane?
Joe: She quit, pal.
Rex: What?
Lucas: And I was lying about your hair, it looks stupid.
Deb: And we all hate your new album.
Burko: Not to mention the ones before that.
Eddie: You're just a washed-up impostor, man.
Rex: (as he leaves) Why don't you all just fade away.
Eddie: (to Gina) How could you? With Rex Manning?
Corey: (as she leaves the room) I hate you.
Joe: Gina, you better go home.
Gina: Am I fired?
Joe: Have I fired anyone today - no. Why would I start with you?
(Corey comes back in the room and walks right up to Gina.)
Corey: So is this how your life's gonna be now, huh? You just gonna screw every has-been until your tits fall down and they don't want you anymore?
Gina: Well at least I don't hide what I am, right Corey? At least I'm not some closet speed freak, right? What, you think I don't see what you do? (screaming) DO YOU THINK I DON'T SEE WHAT YOU DO?
Corey: Shut up!
Gina: I know what you do! (picks up pill container from Corey's pigeon hole) What's this? Oh what's this? What are these, huh, what are these? Aspirin? Vitamins? Diet pills?
Corey: Sshh.
Gina: Diet pills, oh what a surprise!
Corey: Stop it!
Gina: You know what, I could study all night if I was chowing down speed too you know that, I could. (starts throwing pills at Corey) Here's one for your perfect little face, and your perfect body.
Corey: SHUT UP!
Gina: (continuing to throw pills) And your perfect family, and your perfect school.
Corey: STOP IT!
Joe: Gina, stop it. C'mon.
Gina: And your perfect, perfect future! (Joe grabs Gina) I'm stopping.
Joe: C'mon.
Gina: I'm stopping! ... it's always about her. (leaves)
Joe: (to Corey) It's gonna be fine. Really.
Corey: (screaming) No it's not gonna be fine!! Nothing's ever fine!! I'll show you fine! I'll show you perfect!! (She runs into the store and grabs a pair of scissors and begins to mutilate the stand up poster of Rex Manning) I HATE YOU!!!
(Joe, Mark, Eddie, and Burko pull her off the stand up.)

(Bathroom)
(Deb is helping Corey calm down. She is lowering Corey's face into some cool water.)
Deb: Shhh. (lifts Corey's head out of water) Up...better?
Corey: Yeah.
Deb: OK, come on, dry it off. (looks at Corey for a while) So I guess nobody really has it all together.
Corey: No.
Deb: I feel like I should welcome you to the neighborhood or something. (she pulls her pants down and sits down on the toilet.) Anyway, did you really wanna do Rex Manning in the count-out room? Is that how you always imagined your first time would be? Your back up against the daily totals and your feet pounding against the safe. (in a sexy voice) Oh Rexy stop that. You're so sexy.
(Corey smiles at that.)
Corey: Why are you being so nice to me?
Deb: Let's say for a Hallmark moment. (she gets up and flushes the toilet.)

(Break Room)
(Mark is watching music videos while eating Eddie's brownies.)
Mark: Gwar!
(The members of Gwar, on screen, begin talking to Mark.)
Lead Singer: Hey. Hey, Mark. You love Gwar, why don't you join the band?
(Mark is suddenly watching himself on stage on the TV.)
Lead Singer: Aw, man. Mark , man, you play a mean guitar, man. It's really a shame that you must die.
(The Mark on screen begins to get eaten by a big plant of some kind.)
Mark: (on TV) Wait. Hey, come on. Awwwww...
Mark: (in reality while watching himself get eaten on TV) I love you, Eddie.

(Joe's Office)
Jane: Hey. Do you need a new night manager? What are you doing later?
Joe: I don't know. I'm either going to jail or hell, I can't decide which.
Jane: Well wherever you're going would you like to have dinner with me first?
Joe: You bet.

(Break Room Stairs)
(AJ is sitting alone on the stairs. Eddie comes down and sits beside him.)
Eddie: Hey, AJ. Can I ask you something? Do you know where Harvard is?
AJ: It's near Boston.
Eddie: No, I mean, do you really know where Harvard is? It's another planet, man. Another universe. Totally unlike the one we know. Filled with big blond guys who eat ivy and row boats. What I'm trying to say is that you and Corey are just not made for each other. She's, she's different than you. She's -
(AJ gets up and walks off.)

(Break Room)
(Corey is drawing a picture on a card.)
Lucas: Death is in the cards. Rest In Peace Deb. A funeral. Is Debra not with us anymore?
Corey: If Deb wants to die, let's show her what a real funeral would be like.

(Time Lapse)
(Everyone but Mark is now gathered around Debra who's lying on a table. There are candles all around. It's Deb's funeral.)
Corey: We're gathered here today to pay our last respects to Debra. She left us and never said why, but I'm really gonna miss her. And I wish that I could of known her a little bit better.
Deb: Dog shit.
Eddie: Hey, dead people don't talk.
Corey: Burko, would you like to say something?
Burko: Deb I just ... I just want you to stay, that's all.
(Deb makes a face.)
Corey: AJ, do you have something to say?
AJ: Well is it better to know or not to know? You see, I wanna go to art school but I'm afraid.
Deb: Jesus, I hate this funeral.

(The Store)
(Mark is handling everything by himself. It's suddenly very busy in the store. The phone rings.)
Mark: (into phone) Empire Records open til midnight this is Mark…(listens as some person asks how late the store is open till) …midnight! (hangs up the phone)
(Mark begins to panic because there are so many customers.)
Mark: (over PA) Help me. Help me, help me, help me. Oh God, um...

(Break Room)
AJ: I'll take care of it Boss. (leaves)
Joe: OK.
Corey: I really miss Gina.
Deb: That's really special but aren't we supposed to be talking about me?
Corey: I know, I just can't stop thinking about her. She's not afraid of life and she's not afraid to be herself. And I wish that I could be like that, I wish that I could be brave like Gina.
(Gina comes out of the shadows and walks forward.)
Gina: You are brave. You're getting out of here. You're always talking about how I do what I wanna do. But I don't. I don't. Cause I wanna sing in a band but I don't have the guts to even audition. And I know that if I don't do something I'm gonna end up like my mother. Her life ended after high school.
Corey: You're never gonna be like your mother if you don't want to be like your mother. You're gonna be fine.
Deb: That is so sweet I think I'm gonna barf. Excuse me.
(Deb tries to get up and leave, but the others push her back down.)
Corey: Get down here ... (Mark walks up) hey, Mark.
Lucas: Er, I used to pee in my bed. I did, I, I, I wet my bed until I was ten. My mother turned me over to the county when I was ten too, er, not, not for being a bed-wetter but for being a bad seed. Anyways, three years went by and then Joe came and he, er, took me out and I became the well-adjusted person that I am today.
Deb: (unwrapping the bandage from her wrist and showing everyone.) Look. I tried to kill myself with a Lady Bic. A pink plastic razor with daisies on it and a moisturizing strip. And it took me forever just to get through my skin. I don't know, I was just really tired of being invisible.
Corey: We love you Debra.

(The Store)
(AJ is now working the front counter. Warren walks in and pulls out a gun. AJ looks up and notices him.)
AJ: Warren, get out of the store.
Warren: You can't tell me what to do, AJ. (he holds up the gun)
AJ: What are you doing with a gun?
Warren: What do you think I'm doing with a gun?

(Break Room)
(Suddenly a gun shot is heard.)
Eddie: What the hell was that?

(The Store)
Warren: Christ. Holy shit, man.
AJ: Warren, why don't you let these people go. What do you say, huh?
Warren: Good try, AJ. Good try. You trying to fool me, man. I'm not that dumb. They'll call the cops on me.
AJ: Nobody's gonna call the cops.
(Shot of Joe and everyone else looking into the store from the break room window.)
Joe: It's Warren, he's shooting up the
place.
Corey: Oh my God, AJ. Joe: AJ's fine. Everybody stand back, OK. Jane, call 911. (he goes into the store)
(Warren is still waving the gun around.)
Warren: ... I'm crazy and I got a gun. (he notices Joe approaching) Joe. Hey, Joe. Did you see that. Man? Did you see that? Wasn't that brilliant? Yeah! Didn't you just love that? You told me not to come back, well here I am.
Joe: Give me the gun, Warren.
Warren: I'll give you the gun.
(Warren shots the gun off again and Joe stops in his tracks. Deb, however, walks past Joe and heads right for Warren.)
Joe: Deb, what are you doing?
Deb: I wanted to have a little chat with Warren.
Warren: Yeah? Have a little chat with my gun.
Deb: (to gun barrel) What do you want Warren?
Warren: Stop calling me Warren. My name isn't FUCKING WARREN!

(Break Room)
Eddie: His name isn't Warren.
Corey: His name isn't Warren.
Burko: His name isn't Warren?
Mark: I thought his name was Warren.

(The Store)
Deb: Well you can't kill me Warren cause I'm already dead. And I talked to God and she says "Yo, wha’sup?" and she wants you to lose the gun.
Warren: You're psycho. You are psycho. What the hell is wrong with you people? You all belong in the loony bin. Everyone of ya. Forget you guys, I don't need you. You think you're so good and damn great cos you work in a freaking record store. You think you're so ... superior. Hey, Joe, Lucas steals nine grand from you and you don't do dick to him? So you gonna give me a job now?
Burko: (walking up) So that's it Warren? You wanna work in a record store?
Warren: No.
Lucas: I think you're lying, Warren.
Warren: He's not gonna give me a job, man.
Lucas: How do you know?
Warren: Why should he? Why should anyone give me a job?
Lucas: He gave me a job.
(Joe takes the gun from Warren. Police sirens can be heard in the distance.)
Warren: (to Joe) So do I get the job?

(Break Room)
(Time Lapse. The cops have arrived. AJ is making warren a store ID tag.)
Cop: Well considering the fact that he's a minor and he put blanks in the gun, there's really not a whole lot they can do to him.

Joe: Well thanks a lot officers.
Burko: Take care Warren.
Joe: Stay out of trouble, OK?
AJ: Wait, wait a minute ... (goes over and holds up the ID tag) Warren I made this for you.
Warren: Cool, man.
AJ: (starts putting the ID on Warren) Warren I work…
Warren: (pulls back) Wait, wait, wait, wait. Can you keep it her for me so when I get back...
AJ: Sure.
Warren: Thanks, man.
Lucas: Hey, Warren. Take care of yourself, don't let the man get you down.
Warren: Yeah, you too, Lucas. Bye Gina.
Burko: Yeah, don't drop the soap.
(Warren gets taken away.)
Joe: I gotta call Mitchell.
(Deb goes over to Lucas who is sitting on the couch and hands him a fan of money.)
Deb: It's 1900 bucks. I sold my Vespa across the street.
Lucas: No.
Jane: Here's $600 left over from the Rex Manning expense account.
Burko: Cool.
Mark: There's about 30 bucks from Debra's buttons.
Corey: I have some money in my bag.
Burko: Here's a couple of bucks. And some Bazooka Joe for karma.
AJ: Here's $32 from AJ's expense account.
Joe: (handing Lucas his ring) Maybe you can hock this, I don't know.
Deb: That's ... 3050.
Gina: Yeah.
Corey: And 6 more.
Lucas: It's not about money, OK? I, I hate money. Er, look, I thought I knew what I was doing but I didn't, OK. I give up ... call Mitchell.
Joe: I think we can work something out here.
Lucas: No. Now is the time, just call him.
Mark: Woah. Wait a second. Give me a couple of seconds. Oh, yeah.

(Out Front)
(There is a news reporter out in front of the store covering the story of Warren and the gun.)
Reporter: And so the perpetrator will now be taken to Juvenile Hall and likely charged with assault with a deadly weapon and possibly even kidnapping.
Mark: (walks up) Er, I saw the whole thing go down. (holds up his store ID) You see, I work here.

(Break Room)
(Eddie walks in and goes over to the TV.)
Eddie: Hey guys, check it out, check it out. Mark's on TV. (he turns on the TV) He's on the news. He's right outside the store.
Reporter: (on TV) Well joining us is an eyewitness to the scene. An employee of the store who saw it all. Tell us what happened.
Mark: (on TV) Well you see there was this guy here and he kind of wigged out and everything, but that's besides the point. Because we're having a get together here tonight. There's gonna be free admission, live music, chicks, the full nine yards, man. Heavy shit. Here at midnight.
Reporter: (on TV) We're live on the air right now, sir. That's the story kids -
Mark: (on TV) Anybody can come. Here at midnight. Party on, man. Damn the man! Save the Empire!
(Lucas and Joe look at each other as the idea begins to take shape.)

(Time Lapse)
(Shots of the whole group getting ready. Gina making fliers. Corey passing the fliers out to customers who are buying records. Deb setting up a table out front with a jar on it and a sign that says 'Give us your money'. As time goes on people start arriving. Gina, Burko, and the band begin to set up the instruments.)
Gina: (taking drum off Burko) I got it.
Eddie: (to kid while holding a record) You know, this is something you gotta invest in when you're young cause a record is like life. It goes around, and around.
AJ: (indicating an Alice In Chains poster) You want this?
Man: Yeah, how much is it?
AJ: $80.
(Mark arrives with a few kegs of beer.)
AJ: $5 a beer. (to an obviously underage kid) Happy Birthday ... have your money ready.
Mark: There ya go.
(Mitchell arrives and heads into the store.)
Eddie: (to Mitch) You gotta buy something before you go in. You wanna buy some vinyl or something?
Deb: Hi, Mitch.
Mitch: Joe!

(Break Room)
(Mitch comes in looking very irritated.)
Mitch: What is going on here? Why do I get the feeling that I am being royally screwed, Joe?
Joe: Because you are Mitch. There was no money in the bag; one of my employees needed it.
Mitch: Who took it? Who took my money?
Lucas: (walking in) Mitch, this is some party. I mean it's a hell of a turn-out.
Mitch: Who're you?
Lucas: I'm Lucas. I still work here.
Mitch: How could I forget. We're having a discussion here -
Lucas: Mitchell I wanted to talk to you about this whole Music Town thing. Next week you're going to be the proud owner of one of many Music Town's across this great nation. Correct?
Mitch: Yes.
Lucas: And you like this because Music Town jacks up their prices to make more money.
Mitch: You're a smart boy.
Lucas: Now, when Music Town comes in, Joe is out. AJ is out, and all the beautiful little tattooed, gum-chewing freaks are out as well. And it, er, pretty much goes without saying that, that I'm out.
Mitch: I wish it had gone without saying, but you don't seem to shut up.
Joe: What I think Lucas is trying to say is that I'm going to open my own store.
Mitch: You don't have the start-up capital.
Lucas: Yes he does.
Joe: No, I don't. but I will. I will get it. Mitch, I quit.

(The Store)
(Lucas and Joe walk in from the break room.)
Joe: You knew didn't you?
Lucas: About what?
Joe: Everything. About me, what I wanted to do.
Lucas: I knew you weren't happy.

(Out Front)
(Burko and his band start playing. Gina is singing back-up.)
Burko: (singing) They all said life's just a bowl of cherries, but
Sometimes it seems like anything but.
Sometimes reputations outlive their applications
Sometimes fires don't go out when you're done playing with them.
I feel so funny deep inside, I wanna kiss myself goodbye
Sugarhigh.
Gina: (singing) Got to have it really need it to get by.
Burko: (singing) Sugarhigh.
Gina: (singing) Gotta feel it, can't conceal it. Sugarhigh.
Burko: (singing) I could go out and not even leave the house
A TV set and a bottle of wine's just fine
Crashing out on that old pull-out couch
Watching Saturday Night Live
I guess that's why -

(The Store)
Mitch: Thank you for coming. Bye, bye. Thank you, move along.
Girl: (handing Mitch some stuff) These are on sale with a coupon, right?
(Mitch tries to ring her up on the register but he can't figure it out.)
Mitch: Doesn't anybody work in this store?
Warren: (showing Mitch his ID) I do.

(Out Front)
Burko: (singing) When I think about my life
I wanna kiss myself goodbye
Sugarhigh.
Alright!
(Corey is looking around for AJ. She looks up and spots him on the roof trying to fix the sign.)
Corey: (shouting up at AJ) AJ! ... AJ! ... AJ!

(The Store)
Mitch: Please leave. Leave the merchandise, take your cup and get out. There must be someone outisde you need to bug or something. Now!
Joe: Here's all your money, count it.
Mitch: Look, Joe. I hate this place, you love it. Let me sell it to ya. Cheap.
Joe: Thanks, you won't regret it, Mitch. (turns and begins to walk off) Asshole.
Customer: (taking money off Mitch) I'll take it.
Mitch: Give me that!

(Out Front)
Burko: (to Gina) You. (points to microphone) Take the lead.
Gina: What?
Burko: Go on Gina. Take it. You're on.
Gina: (singing) I've - far and wide.
I've explored the deepest caverns of my mind
To try and find and explanation why
I get this funny feeling deep inside
Burko: (singing) When I think about my life
I wanna kiss myself goodbye
Sugarhigh.
Gina: (singing) Gotta have it really need it to get by.
Burko: (singing) Sugarhigh.
Gina: (singing) Wanna feel it can't conceal it makes me high.
Burko: (singing) Sugarhigh.
Gina: (singing) And even though I gotta live until I die.
Burko: (singing) Sugarhigh.
Gina: (singing) Can you feel it
Can you feel it
Sugarhigh!
Burko: Sshhh ....
(The crowd goes wild.)

(Joe's Office)
Lucas: (to camera) Perfect. Well, not entirely perfect.

(The Roof)
(AJ is still working on the sign when Corey shows up.)
AJ: Hi. What are you doin' up here?
Corey: You listen to me. (she pushes AJ to the ground)
AJ: Hello, Corey.
Corey: You are so special and you're so talented and you have everything it takes - you have more than everything it takes - and you're really stupid because you don't know that.
AJ: Huh.
Corey: And I know you don't love me anymore and I know that I blew it, but at least I know that. And if you don't go to art school and if you don't understand how special you are then you know nothing.
AJ: Corey, I…
Corey: And I did love you and I still -, only I didn't realize that it really was love because it was more than love and it wasn't just some stupid feeling in my stomach like everything else. And I'll never love anybody as much as and I hate you, hate you, why do you -
AJ: Corey, Corey, I quit. I'm going to art school. In Boston. So I can be near you.
Corey: (smiles) Really?
AJ: Yeah.
(Corey suddenly falls into AJ's arms. He twirls her around then they kiss.)

(Time Lapse)
(The whole staff is now dancing on the roof.)

(Credits Roll)
(While credits are still rolling we see Mark and Eddie sitting out in front of the store. It's day.)
Mark: ...that, that guy. Whatever his name is. What's his name, er, that dude with the shaved head. The liar guy. Eddie: Henry Rawlins?
Mark: Yeah, yeah, the guy with the tattoos all over him.
Eddie: I admit Henry Rawlins is sort of a puss.
Mark: Yeah, he's a total puss. His lyrics suck.
Eddie: You can't go down and put down The Misfits, man. They had, they had like, everything it took to be a great punk band. They had good bass lines, and, and like, strong guitar chords, even though there was only three, but it -
Mark: They didn't even compare to Primus, man. They were that old-school style -
Eddie: Primus? Why get into Primus? Primus suck.
Mark: Primus is the new stuff. There's always -, I mean the, the, out with the old, in with the new kinda thing.
Eddie: Evolution's a bad thing if Primus is what's gonna come around.
Mark: What are you talking about?
Eddie: I'm talking about the fact that Primus has nothing, man. They've got, like, good bass lines, I'll admit that.
Mark: They have beautiful bass lines. Six string, fretless bass.
Eddie: But they're not as good as, like, like, The Pixies. The Pixies have way better bass lines than that, than, than Primus, man.
Mark: So why didn't they stick around?
Eddie: Well, you know, cause people wanted to do solo careers and explore themselves as single entities instead of a band.
Mark: But that's, I don't know, but that's like money, you know?
Eddie: No, it's not about money.
Mark: Yeah it is.
Eddie: What are you talking about? Money? It's not about money at all. It's about -
Mark: When you've got a band together, when you've got band.
Eddie: Yeah?
Mark: And everything's going fine...

(THE END)