Author: Kate
Rating: PG
Pairing: D/J
Category: dj
Author's Notes: Please, please, please send me some kind of feedback! All you have to do is click write mail, type in Kr0410@aol.com, tell me what you thought of my story, then click send!!! :) It's soo easy!
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"I'm going to Dawson's. I'll probably spend the night." Joey said while putting on her jacket. Dawson had called everyone to come over and watch some movies.
"All right, have fun. And you kids be careful!" Bessie warned, "There's supposed to be severe thunderstorms tonight."
Joey stopped in her tracks. She hated storms. They always reminded her of the night her father had been arrested and taken to jail. That's why she hated scary movies, too. They all had these big storms, and at the end of the movie the bad guy was either killed or taken away by the police. She thought about not going, but figured she would survive and continued out the door.
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"Grams, I'm going to Dawson's! I'll be back in a few hours!" Jen yelled from the bottom of the staircase.
Grams quickly walked down the stairs and said good-bye to her granddaughter. "OK, call me if you need anything."
"Grams, I'm just going to be next door. I doubt were going to be needing anything, but thanks anyway." And with that Jen walked out the door and headed toward Dawson's house.
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"Hey guys." Dawson said as he looked through his extensive collection of videos.
Pacey and Jen had just arrived and were waiting for Joey to show up so they could all pick out a movie After a few minutes of watching an old cheesy "Charles in Charge" rerun, they all heard the familiar footsteps on the roof outside of Dawson's window.
"Hey Jo. We were beginning to think you weren't going to make it." Jen said.
"Yea," Dawson continued, "I thought you might not come at all. I know how you feel about thunderstorms." He laughed.
Joey took a little offense to his comment. He knew that she was afraid of thunderstorms - he just didn't know why. Joey had never told him the specifics of the night her father had been taken away and she didn't plan on letting him know any time soon. She was actually a little embarrassed by the fact that storms made her so scared. She just couldn't help it. Every time she heard the harsh crack of lightning she jumped. She remembered lying in Bessie's lap right after her father had been taken away as Bessie promised her that everything would be all right. Later that night as she was lying in her bed, she just listened to the rain fall on the roof. She would occasionally drift off to sleep but would wake-up to the thunder and start screaming for Bessie.
"So what are we going to watch tonight?" Pacey asked
"Well, keeping with the theme of the weather, I thought we could watch Halloween. And, if we have time afterward, maybe we could watch Scream." Dawson finished with a smile. He loved his horror movies.
"Dawson you love scaring me don't you?" Joey asked. "You know for a fact every single on of those movies will terrify me."
Dawson smiled, "Then why don't you go home, Jo?"
He knew why she didn't. It was starting to thunder, and in the distance you could see bright flashes of lightning. There was no way she would get in her boat and row across the creek to her house. Joey just grumbled and sat down on the bed sulking. She knew going to Dawson's was a bad idea.
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"Ahhhhhhhhh!"
Everyone jumped. That was the sixth time Joey had screamed all night...you'd think they'd be used to it by now. They were all starting to get annoyed but before anyone could 'shh' Joey, the electricity went out. This only brought out a series of long, painfully loud screeches by Jen and Joey. Pacey just looked at Dawson saying, "Women." As if that were to explain everything.
"Everyone just calm down. Joey go with Pacey to go find some blankets. Jen, you come with me to find the candles and flashlights. We'll meet you downstairs."
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After a few minutes, Pacey and Joey brought the blankets downstairs to see Dawson and Jen lighting some candles, and putting batteries into the old flashlights.
"Looks like this night could get worse then I expected." Joey muttered as she grabbed a blanket and sat down on the couch next to Dawson.
"God, Joey get over it!" Pacey said taking a seat in Mitch's old lay-z-boy recliner.
"So, what are we going to do now?" Jen questioned sitting in the old rocking chair next to the fire place.
"We could talk." Dawson suggested.
"Oh Dawson, that's all we ever do." Joey said showing her annoyance.
"What about truth or dare?" Pacey said.
"Did we learn nothing from detention?" Joey said.
"Actually, I think it's a good idea." Dawson looked to Jen who nodded in agreement.
"Well, you can't make me play." Joey said matter-of-factly as she crossed her arms over her chest.
"Jo, don't be such a baby." Pacey said. "It's not that big of a deal."
"Shut-up Pacey!" Joey exclaimed, but decided to play anyway -- she didn't want to be left out.
"OK, I'll start." Dawson said. "Let's see.... Joey! Truth or dare?"
Joey sighed and said, "Truth."
"OK, good. Why are you so afraid of storms?"
"I meant dare." Joey corrected herself after hearing the question. She didn't want everyone to feel sorry for her, she hated pity.
"OK..." Dawson said annoyed. "Then, I dare you to tell us why your so afraid of storms." Dawson mentally patted himself on the back for finding a way out of having to think of a dare, but still being able to find out what made Joey so scared.
All eyes were on Joey. She looked at Dawson with hatred in her eyes. He knew that she didn't want to tell them. It would be one thing if it was just her and Dawson, then she might have eventually told him. But she didn't want everyone to know about something that was that personal. So, she stood up, looked Dawson in the eye, and walked up the steps to his room.
Dawson just sat there dumbfounded. He didn't know why one simple question could make her that upset.
"Well, aren't you going to go after her, man?" Pacey questioned.
"Yea, I guess I should." Dawson said as he started to get up off the couch.
"Dawson, wait. Just give her a few minutes. Let her cool off." Jen warned.
"Yea, I guess your right. So what are we going to do now?" Dawson asked.
Just then Gail walked in with some groceries. "Why don't you kids put these away? I'm going to go get changed then I have to go pick up your father at work. His car broke down." Gail said while picking up a flashlight and walking up the steps.
"Wait, Mom. Do you think it's such a good idea to go out in this weather?" Dawson asked him mom.
"Well, no. Not really. But I don't want to leave your dad at work all night. There's no telling when he could get home."
"I guess so." Said Dawson as his mother reached the top of the stairs.
"Why don't you guys use the cell phone to call your parents. Tell them your going to spend the night. It's already nine O'clock."
So Jen and Pacey called their parents cell phones while Dawson unpacked the groceries.
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"Joey, honey? Is that you?" Mrs. Leery asked Joey as she walked passed Dawson's room.
"Yea, it's me Mrs. Leery." Joey responded.
"Well, why aren't you downstairs with everyone else?"
"Dawson." She stated.
"Mmm." Mrs. Leery said knowing what Joey meant. "What did he do this time?"
"He just pushes too far sometimes."
"Yes, he does." She said empathizing. "But, you know he means well."
"I guess. He just makes me so frustrated and mad. I just don't know what to do sometimes." Joey let out a deep sigh.
Mrs. Leery walked over to her and put her arm around Joey. "I think I know why Dawson is making you so mad." Joey looked up at her. "You don't think you could keep it from me, do you Joey?" Mrs. Leery joked. "I know you just like I know Dawson. I know how to pick up on things that only mothers can."
Joey knew what Mrs. Leery was getting at and she had to smile. She really missed not having a mom, but having Mrs. Leery was just as good. Sometimes, they would go out to eat and talk about things that only mothers and daughters talked about. In a way, they both needed each other. Joey was without a mother, and Mrs. Leery was without a daughter. Of course she loved Dawson with all of her heart, but it wasn't the same. Every woman wants a daughter that they can dress up and put hair in braids. Even if Joey was well past that stage in her life, they could still have a lot of fun.
"So, why is it, Mrs. Leery, that you think I'm so upset with Dawson?" Joey asked with a smile on her face.
"Oh, honey. You really like him a lot, don't you?" Mrs. Leery said suddenly getting serious.
"Well, if it helps any, I think he likes you too. He just hasn't let himself realize his feelings yet. Trust me, mothers know these things." With that said, Mrs. Leery sympathetically patted Joey on the back and walked out the room.
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"Did your parents say everything was cool?" Dawson asked after Pacey got off the cell phone.
"Yea, they didn't even know I was gone" Pacey replied.
"What about you Jen?"
"Grams threatened to come over, but I'm pretty sure that I convinced her that we're OK."
"Good." Dawson and Pacey replied at the same time. Mrs. Ryan had never exactly been kind to either of the boys.
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"I'm going now. You kids be good. I'll be back as soon as possible. Call me if you need anything at all." Mrs. Leery said as she rushed out of the door.
"Be careful Mom." Dawson warned. "I better go talk to Joey.
"Good luck, man." Pacey said with a slap on the shoulder.
"Have a feeling I'm going to be needing it." Dawson sighed.
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Upstairs Joey was in Dawson's closet when she heard a knock on the door, 'oh no' she sighed to herself. 'Here comes the inevitable argument.' "Joey, where are you?" Dawson asked. He had a feeling he knew where -- the closet. He , but she didn't answer so he opened the door. "Hey." He said when he saw her curled up in the corner of the closet.
"Hey" Joey replied almost inaudibly.
"Mind if I sit?" Dawson asked.
"I guess."
"So, umm... wanna talk?"
"I thought that was understood, Dawson."
"OK." Dawson laughed uncomfortably. "What did I do, Jo?" He asked in an almost pleading voice.
"You just know how to make me mad. You must've known that I didn't want to talk about it."
"Well, I certainly didn't know you were going to overreact!" Dawson exclaimed in his defense.
"Didn't know I was going to overreact?" Joey mimicked not believing he just said that. "I thought you knew me well enough to know when I obviously don't want to talk about something!"
"It's just a stupid thunderstorm! It's not anything to be afraid of! I didn't think that you of all people would be scared of something that only two year olds are!"
Joey looked at Dawson not wanting to believe that the words that just came out of his mouth really did. She tried her hardest not to let her tears spill out of her eyes as she glared at Dawson and stormed out of his room. She didn't know where she could go. All she knew is she didn't want to be in the same house as Dawson any longer. She decided to sit on the screened-in-porch. It was a little to close to the storm then she wanted to be, but it was also the last place that Dawson would look for her, right?
Wrong. Dawson found her in one minute tops.
"Joey, please, tell me what I can say to make this better."
"When I stormed off, did you not get the hint that I don't want to be around you?" She got up and walked into the living room with Dawson on her heels. So, she tried the kitchen, then the dining room, then the family room. Every where she went Dawson was right behind her. So, putting her fears aside, she decided to do something that he wouldn't expect her to do; she walked outside. She hesitated at the door, but figured she had nothing to lose. Joey ran straight the tool shed behind Dawson's house and walked in shutting the door behind her. She heard pounding on the door.
"Jo! Let me in! It's pouring out here!" She heard Dawson whining from outside the shed.
She finally gave in not wanting to be alone. As much as she hated Dawson at that moment, she didn't want to be alone in an old shed with the only sound you could hear was the banging of the rain on the roof and the loud crashes of thunder from above. "What do you want?!"
"I just want to know why you got so upset." Dawson stated.
"You want to know why I'm so afraid of storm, Dawson? Hmm?"
He shook his head yes. "Yea, I do."
She hesitated a little before telling her story, but eventually told Dawson all the things that she had kept to herself for years. "The night my father was taken to prison it was like this outside. The cracks of lightning and the consistent beating of the rain on top of the police cars will forever be etched into my mind. It's all I remember hearing. That night it got even worse. It was hailing and the rain didn't seem like it would ever stop. I just sat in my bed sobbing thinking about how much I hated my father."
Dawson just looked at her with pity in his eyes. Joey knew that look well and hated it. "So, I'm terribly sorry, Dawson that I didn't feel like telling my sad little story in front of everyone. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go back to the house." With all that said, she walked out of the shed past Dawson and ran to the house.
Dawson just stood there not knowing what to say or do or think. He finally realized why she was so closed up about the whole issue. He felt horrible, but soon realized he didn't have the right to feel that way. He had just embarrassed his best friend. He knew how important Joey's pride was to her, and he had just put her on the spot in front of Pacey and Jen. No, he didn't have the right to feel horrible; Joey did. He had the right to feel like a jack ass. But her sudden outbursts had been confusing him lately. Of course she had every right to yell at him that night, but the Joey he knew would have been just a little bit more calm. Joey yelled at him a lot, but Dawson couldn't remember the last time she had yelled at him with such gusto and venom in her voice, or else he couldn't remember it ever bothering him that much. In any case, he had still screwed up, and it was time to make amends. He ran to the house and started to look for Joey.
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Joey stormed into the living room and tried to act natural. She didn't want Jen or Pacey to ask her any questions. The three must have sat in silence for up to five minutes until Joey asked Jen if she could see her in the kitchen. Jen said OK, and followed Joey into the other room.
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Dawson walked into the living room to find Pacey by himself looking awfully confused. Dawson decided he should tell him everything. Maybe he could shed a little light onto the situation.
"Pace, can we talk?"
"Sure man, what's up?"
"Turns out there's a very good reason that Joey's afraid of storms..."
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"What should I do, Jen?" Joey asked desperately after telling her everything that had happened that night. "I know we've never exactly been the best of friends, but in this situation, I don't think anyone with a penis can help me."
"I'm glad you came to me, Joey. But, I don't understand what your asking. What do you mean, ' What should I do?' You had every right to be mad. Dawson should be the one asking that question."
"Do I really have to say it?" By the look on Jen's face, she knew she was going to have to explain everything. "I like Dawson, a lot." She said shyly. "And I think I overreacted to this whole thing. I mean, he was asking a perfectly legit question. I think I was a little harder on him just because I'm so frustrated with him."
"Why are you so frustrated with him?"
"Because I've liked him for three years. Three years! Do you know how long that is? Do you know how hard it is to look at him and want to tell him how much I love him? To want to kiss him? To reach out and hold him?" She could feel her energy draining from her body, but continued. "And now it's like I'm stuck at a fork in the road. Do I go on as I am now, hurting every time I look at him? Or, do I tell him how I feel and risk our whole relationship?"
"I know this is going to sound cliche, but you have to follow your heart. That's the best advice anyone could ever tell you. Do what you think is right. You want to know why you've all of a sudden come to this fork in the road? It's because you know your ready for a change. You know that you can't go on hurting like you are now."
Joey looked at Jen and smiled. She reached over and gave her a hug, surprising Jen. "Wish me luck!" Joey said as she stood up.
"Why? What are you going to do?" But Joey didn't answer, she just continued out the door. Jen was left alone in the kitchen looking dazed with a little smile on her face. She had to admit it, Joey sure was one of a kind.
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"So, let me get this straight. Joey gets mad at you for asking her why she's afraid of storms, you go upstairs to find her in your closet, you say something stupid, she storms off, you follow her to the shed and she yells at you some more, now you don't know what to do. Is that correct?" Pacey asked.
All Dawson could do was shake his head yes followed by a weak "Yep, you got it man."
"This doesn't sound too different from any of you and Joey's other fights. What's so different now?"
"That's what I can't figure out. I know that our relationship has been anything but simple, but I've always known what she was thinking and what I could say to make her feel better. At least I could up until a few months ago. Now, something's just... different somehow."
"Are you still that oblivious? My God, man! She loves you! That's what's changed! That's what's so different! And now your starting to realize that you love her too, you just don't know what to do about it!"
"That's not true. Joey Potter? Love me?" He shook his head. "I don't think so."
"Well, I do. And you know it. You know you love her, you're just too confused to see it. Your little world was perfect, then all of a sudden one day Jen walks into your life turning your friendship with Joey into pure turmoil. And now that this whole Jen-Fling-Thing is over, you faced with a dilemma. Do you chose to see your feeling for Joey? Or do you ignore them and do your little Peter Pan thing and refuse to grow up? It's up to you man, but if I were you, I'd leave Tinkerbell behind." Pacey stood up to leave Dawson with his thoughts.
After a few minutes of contemplation, he ran up the steps to see none other then Joey sitting on his bed.
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It was probably the biggest risk that she had ever taken. She didn't know what his reaction would be. This one little risk had the power to change her life instantly. Of course, she hoped for the best, but after she did her part, it was up to him to decide what would happen next. To say the least, she was unsure of her decision, but that didn't stop her.
When he walked into the room, she smiled, which took him by surprise. He started to apologize, "Jo, I'm so sorry. I screwed up, I know. Now, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I just don't know what to do." Dawson's voice was pleading.
She decided she couldn't wait any longer. She walked up to him, "It's OK, Dawson. I know I didn't make this whole thing easy on you, I blew it way out of proportion."
"No, you didn't, Joey. You had every right to be -" He was cut off by her lips. She snaked her fingers through his hair as his shock set in then quickly wore off. Soon, he was wrapping his arms around her waist, and making her whole body shudder by rubbing his tongue along the roof of her mouth. Then Pacey's words popped into his head, 'Are you still that oblivious? My God, man! She loves you! That's what's changed! That's what's so different! And now your starting to realize that you love her too, you just don't know what to do about it!'
The last sentence bothered him. After the kiss ended, what was going to happen? He didn't know if he could every see Joey as more then his best friend. Sure, it felt good to have her in his arms now, but what next? He stepped back, afraid that if let himself stay that way too much longer, he wouldn't ever be able pull away.
Joey stood there looking at the uncertainty in Dawson's eyes. She couldn't say that she didn't expect this, she just hoped that it wouldn't happen. But, now that it has, she turned and walked down the hallway. She didn't feel like confronting Jen and Pacey at the moment. She was quite upset. And who wouldn't be? She had just changed her friendship with Dawson forever. So, for the lack of another place to go, she went into the bathroom. She sat on top of the toilet and pulled her knees to her chest. But, she wouldn't let herself cry; she had shed too many tears that night, and far more over Dawson.
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Dawson ran down the steps, yelling, "Pacey! Pacey! Come here now! Please!"
Pacey ran to the stairs to find a very perplexed Dawson panting out of breath. "What is it?" He asked with concern evident in his voice.
"She kissed me."
"And...."
"And, I kissed her back."
"So..."
"So, I liked it."
"The problem being....?"
"The problem being that I pulled away."
"You what?!"
"I know, I know! Stupid. But, I couldn't help it! What's going to happen afterward? How can I know that I'll be able to look at Joey and see her as the person I love instead of my best friend? I've spent the past three months trying to ignore my feelings for her and only see her as a friend. Now, I don't know if I can allow myself to see her any differently."
"You've really done it this time, haven't you?" Pacey laughed, "Now, listen to me, and listen to me carefully. You understand?" Dawson nodded. "Go up the stairs, find her, look into her eyes, and if you see little Joey Potter sitting there, the one that you grew up with, the one with the braids in her hair and Band-Aids on her elbows, then explain to her that kiss was a mistake and try to salvage what's left of your friendship. But, if you look at her and see what you've been trying to ignore, then run to her and kiss her." Dawson nodded and headed back up the steps
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When Joey had walked out of his room, he hadn't seen where she had gone, all he knew was that she was somewhere upstairs. He checked all of the rooms, but eventually found her in the bathroom. She had her head tucked into her knees, but when he said, "Jo?" she looked up.
He didn't see the same girl that he had consoled after her mother had died. He didn't see that same girl who came to him whenever she needed to get away from Bessie and her devil nephew. Instead, he saw a girl looking depressed and miserable. But, beautiful nonetheless. He walked over to her and reached out his hand. She questioningly accepted and he pulled her up. Suddenly realizing that they were in the bathroom, he picked her up and lead her to his bedroom. They had a history there, so he wanted their first kiss as a couple to be there. They were both smiling as he put her down and he kissed her.
Between kisses, she asked, "I thought that this wasn't what you wanted."
"Oh, Joey, just shut up and don't ruin the moment." She kissed him in response.
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Later that night around midnight, after the storm had blown through, Joey and Dawson were sitting on the screened in porch. They were wrapped in each others arms kissing as Mrs. and Mr. Leery walked in.
Mrs. Leery looked at Joey and smiled. She knew this would happen sooner or later. But, now she wanted to know how they went from not talking to making out on the porch. "Joey, I think tomorrow would be a good day to go out to lunch." Joey agreed.
"And Dawson, tomorrow you can help me take that ladder down." Mr. Leery added. Dawson groaned, but eventually agreed.
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