PHOENIX
"He actually bought bridal magazines?!"
"He subscribed to them using my name. I didn't even know there were that many bridal magazines" Carol elaborated.
Susan laughed hysterically. She tried to get her breath to explain "It's just - I never thought, I mean Doug --- and BRIDAL magazines"
Carol started laughing "That was my response, too."
"So then what happened?" Susan inquired "As if I don't already know" Susan knew alright, anyone with a functioning neuron would know what Doug and Carol, or any engaged couple, would do in that situation.
"Then we kissed" Carol responded, eager to tell the story but wanting to reveal the parts slowly, like any good storyteller would. "And the phone rang"
"Gee, I wish when I kissed a guy, it was powerful enough to set off phones." Susan teased.
"It was my mom"
"Ouch" She knew that Helen Hathaway had never really liked Doug. She remembered that Carol had told her about her mother's phone calls to Doug in the middle of the night when she would yell at Doug and curse him in Russian. Doug had told Susan years ago, that he almost wished Carol was an orphan. He'd been joking at the time, but she knew the prospect of not having to put up with Helen would have made things a lot easier on Doug, to say the least. "That probably killed the mood" Especially if Helen began cursing at him in again, Susan thought to herself.
"Well, not really" Carol hesitated. She was eager to share the news, but wanted to tease a little first. She'd had that habit for most of her life, but it grew stronger when she first started dating Doug. Mainly because it drove him batty.
"Spill it!" Susan knew Carol had big news about this and she wasn't going to let Carol play the maybe-I'll-tell-you game. Not on something like this and Susan suspected that this news was almost as big as the engagement.
"My mom told Doug to call her mom" Carol could tell from her voice that she really wanted to know and was beginning to burst from keeping this in. Besides, she figured she'd be able to do this on other occasions.
"No way!" Susan was in awe. She had overheard Helen once tell Carol that Doug was "a no good-schmuck" and would cause her "nothing but heartache"
"Even I was surprised" Carol nodded. She was still trying to take in the news, that yes, her mother really had accepted Doug as Carol's fiancee and future husband.
"Wow!"
"And THEN we went upstairs" Carol said affirming Susan's earlier assumption.
"And let me save you the trouble of telling me, great sex, mindblowing, amazing sex." Susan teased, she'd heard details of their love life so many times, she wished she had something even remotely resembling the unbelievable passion that her friends shared.
"Well... yes" They both laughed.
"Which is what sucked about Seth" Susan stated when they calmed down enough. "The guy was the clumsiest fool I've ever seen in bed" Clumsy, and boring, she reminded herself. The man was as intriguing to her as watching the weather forecast in Phoenix. Every so often she wished for some snow or something to break up the monotony.
"Oh, he couldn't have been that bad" Carol knew Susan could exaggerate especially on the topic of the boyfriend she recently left.
"Ha! You have Doug, the stud who gives you the key to his heart how do you know?"
"I dated Tag, remember" Carol reminded her. God, Tag was dull, she thought. She shuddered when she remembered how close she came to marrying him.
"Seth was so dull, he made Tag look romantic". On her dates with Seth she used to recite anatomy to herself to block him out.
Carol snorted involuntarily.
"It's true, Seth's idea of romance was 'Hey Sue, wanna scratch my back?' His HAIRY back, I might add" It was sheer lonliness that drove her to date him for so long, but she wouldn't admit it to herself at the time, she just looked for excuses for him.
"Ewww..." That image was definitely disgusting, Carol thought. Why Susan always had so much trouble with men was beyond her. Her friend was great but just never seemed to get involved with men who she would have any possibility of love with. She suspected Susan was afraid of getting married and becoming like her own parents. Which was ridiculous, but we all do things that logically we shouldn't.
"Exactly" Susan tried to keep the loneliness from her voice and the desire to have someone, anyone even if he was boring, clumsy and had a hairy back.
"You'll find someone" Carol reassured her.
"Sure, and maybe if I clap my hands Tinkerbell will live" Susan quipped. She was so tired of hearing that. Even Chloe was telling her that now. God, Chloe was reassuring her on her love life. She thought, I must be desperate.
"Cut it out, I'm surprised you aren't married already. I thought you'd be first" Carol did indeed think Susan would be married long before she would. Actually she had a bet on it when they were all back at County.
"To whom, Div?" Susan said. Div was long gone, and truth was even if Div hadn't left suddenly, she wouldn't have married him anyway.
"Weeelll" Carol hesitated "Mark"
"That ship has sailed" Susan wasn't surprised that Carol had said that. She knew that a bunch of people had thought she would eventually end up with Mark Greene, herself included. She really didn't know entirely why she left him on after he told her he loved her. She was honest when she said she did love him. She had asked herself that question repeatedly over the years, when things hadn't worked out with some guy or another. She couldn't understand why she felt so compelled to go when he practially beggeed her to stay, but regardless of the reason she boarded that train, and nothing would undo that or the passage of time.
"True" Carol said sadly. She did like Elizabeth, and she knew he made Mark happy. Yet, the idea of Susan and Mark making each other happy had been what she had wished for both of her friends.
"Besides he's with the English one know, what's her name, Colmaine?" Susan said attempting to be casual. She still loved Mark like a longtime friend, but she couldn't even bring herself to so much as call him after she left him that day. She wanted to, especially when she heard about his attack at work and his parents deaths. She figured he wouldn't want to hear from or see her again anyway. In less than five months, she would be maid of honor and would be watching as Carol and Doug got married. She would see Mark there with Elizabeth and she would probably go alone. She didn't relish that idea but she wouldn't tell Carol so.
"Corday, Elizabeth Corday" Carol corrected. She was beginning to wonder if having Mark and Susan together in the wedding party was the worst idea in the whole sad history of bad ideas. Neither had voiced any objection, but they also hadn't seen each other in years.
"Right, he's with her." and I'm alone and will be that way, she added silently.
"Mark's boring anyway" Carol deadpanned.
Susan laughed "You're just trying to console me"
"Is it working?" Carol asked hopefully. Maybe this would be okay after all. After all, both parties were adults.
"Maybe" Hell, she'd smiled her way through weddings before, she could do it again.
"I'll just have to set you up with someone at the wedding." "I hear Romano's still single" Carol tried to keep her voice serious.
"The guy you describe as 'Mein Napoleon'?" Susan questioned. She'd heard the stories about County's new chief of staff. Aside from his lovely Nazi type rulership style the guy was a sexist ass.
"Well, he's compact." Carol argued. She was grinning already.
"Yeah, I can put him in my pocket. No thanks" Susan laughed.
"That's your problem, you're too picky" Carol kidded.
"Just call me the spinster" Susan agreed.
"You're too young to be a spinster" Carol pointed out. That was a newer one from Susan for the past few months, she'd been calling herself that. Carol knew it had arisen out of her breakup with Seth.
"Well, wait a few years" Susan quipped.
"You're not going to be a spinster" Carol firmed her voice and conviction. God, I'll play matchmaker if I have to, Carol promised her silently, but you won't be a spinster.
"Riiight"
"Hey, if Chloe can get her life together then anything is possible, right?"
"True" Susan relented