DISCLAIMERS: The characters of Xena, Gabrielle, Steve Irwin and Terry (Mrs. Croc Hunter) Irwin all belong to the appropriate entities.
The story (as well as the episodes that follow) is copyright 2000 Kimyoo Films. None may be archived or stored anywhere else without the written, prior consent of the author.
My really bad Australian accent should be blamed on my mind and no one else. *g*
"Croc Hunter Goes Grecian: Episode One" by Magenta
copyright 2000 Kimyoo Films.
"G'dae! I'm Steve Eerwin and I wont to welcome you to a veery speecial edition of Crocodile Hunter. Wee're coming t'you todae from th' fairaway laend of Aincient Graece!"
*Croc Hunter creeps through a tavern door and crouches behind some conveniently placed barrels*
"By Crikey! Thees area's teeming with wyldlyfe! Wow!! Look ohver theereh!" *points to a striking brunette with swirling armour and a brown leather battle dress*
"Wah...she's a beaut, ollrieght. She's a Waerrier Princeess. Veery raere in thees dae and age.
"And look ohver theereh!!" *points towards a dimunative blonde woman with short hair and odd forky objects not unlike pitchforks in the tops of her boots*
"Wah!! Danegah, danegah, danegah...that lil blonde beauty over theereh might look like a hahmleess beastie, but by Crikey...get heer angry and shee'll teear yer heead off.
"Uhoh...that bloke's in fer a nastee bight...let's go in and geet a closer look..."
*Croc Hunter creeps in closer as he sees some dirty ruffian laying hands on the Warrior Princess's derrier*
"Hey, good lookin'...you can cook somethin' fer me anytime!"
*Croc Hunter shakes his head, but keeps his low profile behind a bar stool*
"Uhoh...that bloke's jist maede the beegist aend most daedly mistaeke of his lyfe."
*The Warrior Princess grabs the ruffian's hands from her butt and flips him over her head so when he lands, he's facing the dimunative blonde*
*Croc Hunter starts jumping around* "It's sae raere to see one of theese beauties een action!! I feel sae privledged!!"
*The blonde smiles at him, but it's the Warrior Princess who kicks his butt, literally, over the blonde and through the wall opposite her*
"WOOHOO!"
*Croc Hunter's cheer is heard by the Warrior Princess and the Blonde who turn towards him*
"Uhoh! I've been spotted...hoepfully I caen geet out of heere beefore theey decighd I'd make a good between meals snack."
*Facing the two, who are looking at him as if he were completely off his mental rocker (and let's face it...he IS), Croc Hunter slowly backs away the way he came. Suddenly, and from seemingly nowhere, Mrs. Croc Hunter does a voice over*
"Now here is where Steve REALLY messed up. He knows where he's been, but he doesn't know where he's going..."
*Then, the Croc Hunter backs into the Ruffian who was thrown out of the tavern through the wall."
"By Crikey, I'm a lucky bloke!! Danegah, danegah, danegah!! At leeast thaght ruffian's not eentereested in me...hee's eentereested in th' Waerrier Princeess and the preety blonde."
*Croc Hunter's Voice Over is...well...over as he quickly steps away from the Ruffian and out of the tavern. Sounds of a massive struggle are coming from within the structure.*
"Whew!! Thaght was a close shave, eeven f'mee, Steve Eerwin! Right now, the maile is fighting with the two feemails for maighting rights, but I can teell y'theese... *ululation from the Warrior Princess here* Nitherh th' blonde nor the Waerrier Princeess ahre going to geeve each other up, eespecially not fer th' lighkes of 'im. *The Croc Hunter hitches his thumb back towards the tavern just as the Warrior Princess sends him sailing through the roof. He lands almost right next to Steve.*
"By CRIKEY!! Leet's geet a clohser look..." *Croc Hunter leans in close to the unconscious ruffian*
"WHEHOO!! If theese guy's not deeadly with a knighfe, his body ohdour would ceertainly kill eenyone close enough to 'im.
"If you look at his teeth, yew'll see that theyh're not oll theghre. Since the mailes of theese speecies often get inteugh fights, theese isn't a serprizing fact.
"Leet's leave the bloke alone fer now...theere's SAE much moore f'me tae show ya!!!"
*Steve walks away...until next time on Croc Hunter Goes Grecian*
Episode Two
Comments to the_AURYN@angelfire.com.
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