My life is rather complicated at the moment, things seem to sort themselves out in some respects but then get complicated again in other respects. It can be rather confusing at times, although sometimes that confusion is interesting: I mean if everything was simple then wouldn't life be boring? In some ways we do feed off things being difficult and confusing that really require some serious thought in working them out, but at times it would be nice if things were simple.

At some stage I will updated the layout of my web-page - either when I get some cool new software or if I get a sudden inspiration to do something completely different and things just become clear. Or I could always search the net for cool javascript codes and adjust my web-site as I go - but maybe I really should try to plan things so that it remains easy to navigate. I have a horrible feeling at times that people can't find the links page on my main page so that they never even get the chance to see about 95% of my web-page and just think that my site is another one of those 'one page sites' that drive me insane! Please let me know if you have problems with this as I am considering something a little more obvious in order to let people realise what's in my site.

I haven't got any replies about my 'crack at the monarchy' entries last time I updated this page so either you all agreed with me, couldn't be bothered reading it, or couldn't give a toss either way. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......

As I finally crack 400 mp3s, from starting in about September last year with Napster my collection has grown and grown (although not surprisingly there are a few that I don't like anymore!) The next aim has to be 500, although it is increasingly difficult these days finding non-copyright protected files. Napster is useless now, iMesh looks set to go itself while Audio Galaxy also has been partially crippled by the greedy record companies.

The republic debate in New Zealand has grown over the past 10 years with the country becoming increasingly divided over whether we should keep the Queen as our head of state, or instead create our own figurehead President as has been done in other countries around the world. In Australia they got to the point of having a referendum over the topic although it was sabotaged by the politicians who said that they would be the ones to choose the President rather than the people themselves. Here in New Zealand I think about 60% of the population is in favour of the status quo while 40% or thereabout wish to move forward towards a republic - this is a marked change from about 20 years ago where closer to 80% of the population was in favour of the status quo.

I guess my point is that I am definately in favour or change - I think that the whole monarchical system is anti-democratic and is degrading to New Zealand as a whole. By recognising the Queen as our head of state we are basically accepting that we are not good enough to look after ourselves completely independent of Britain. If you really think about it what benefits do we gain from having the Queen as head of state? We get to participate in the Commonwealth Games every four years, although many republics are now actually recognised as part of the commonwealth. By installing a New Zealand icon such as Sir Edmund Hilary as a figurehead, to have a New Zealander on the back of our coins and notes would finally give us the independence that was lost through the Treaty of Waitangi. Possibly then we might be able to decide upon a 'real' day of independence.

Back at McDonald's, realising how could this stupid company have been so successful??? Interestingly enough it looks like worldwide McDonald's isn't actually doing that well anymore as people demand a little more taste from their food than McDonald's has to offer. Also with more concern about the quality of food the "processed" nature of McDonald's has been brought to the attention of the general population. In other words "McDonald's is rubbish, piece of shit food... and more people are realising that these days."

I saw Bridget Jones' Diary today, pretty good movie although as I had already read the book there weren't many secrets for me to uncover. There is a sequel book which I have read about half of that looks pretty interesting and would make a really cool movie.

Life is way confusing, at times like this I wouldn't mind this to be a secret diary so that I could really let my feelings out - however it isn't and if I was to write about my true emotions at the moment it wouldn't be fair on a lot of people. Maybe I should start a real diary? A secret one on paper that I only read myself? If that happened and actually got going then this one would probably die - which would be a shame I suppose. I think the truth is that if I was to start a diary that only I would read I would get sick of writing in it after about 2 days. Therefore in some ways it's good that this page is read by others as it gives me an incentive to keep on updating it as frequently as I can.

Rain rain rain..... ever since I got back from Australia it hasn't seemed to have stopped raining... why? Very very annoying.

First week of University is out of the way, seems to have gone by in a flash although that's not too surprising since it was only three days long. I haven't done any work beyond going to lectures and a tiny bit of reading which makes me feel horribly guilty as I know that this semester is going to be hell busy. Especially as I have lots of essays due pretty much at the time time which is always an aboslute pain in the ass.

Life is confusing, we change our minds about things and we really don't know our true feelings until they smash you in the face. In some cases even then it can be confusing, to be able to separate true feelings from those which you have made yourself believe - the good old brain vs. heart debate can drive any sane person nuts because you really don't know what you truly want. I guess the only way to find things out is with the "time will tell" quote but that really doesn't help in the present does it?

I wonder whether I analyse things too much, should I just 'go with the flow' a little bit more? Problem is that when I act in those ways problems can occur. But then again great things can (and do) happen when a little less planning and analysis goes into my actions, I suppose that a balance has to be found somehow between being too pre-planned and missing out on really cool stuff that would have happened if I had been more spontaneous, and being too spontaneous which can lead to screw-ups and hurting people or embarrassment. Who ever said that life is simple was WRONG!

I am keeping up a bit better with my news entries now, which I suppose makes sense now that I don't have to worry about catching a bus across Sydney in the middle of the night as I am home. It's a nice feeling to sleep in your own bed for the first time in over three weeks, even though my bed's a piece of crap (which is broken) it is like HOME and I slept like a baby last night (to such an extent I nearly slept through my first lecture of the day!)

Uni looks challenging this semester, with all my papers being second year papers it seems as though I will have to put in some serious work (BUGGER!!) and the essays are rather long. Oh well as long as I can keep my marks around where they are at the moment then I will be rather pleased, must place more emphasis on course work as that's where I screwed up big time last semester.

Another twist in the long line of how weird internet chat is. Tonight for some reason all the old chatters who haven't been on for about a year decided to come back to NZ chat making it one of the better chat sessions for quite some time, although I felt like a Newbie which is silly since I have been chatting regularly for over a year now! It's strange when 2 old regulars come back on the same night... let alone six or seven!

Back in good ol' New Zealand now.... and back at University which is like the down-side of being home but I guess you have to talk the bad with the good. The last week of my life has been kind of.... well... odd, and although I really don't want to go into detail I thought that everyone should know that if I seem to be really really talking out of my ass today (I don't usually?) then it's probably because a lot is going on in my life at the moment.

Flight yesterday was OK, I guess that I am now beginning to become used to flying and the thrill has gone which is a bit of a pity. Now I just have to get used to spending over three hours in a seat cramped up with my knees up around my chin (not quite... slight exaggeration I'm not that tall). The food on the plane was rubbish (surprise surprise), seemingly a mixture of the left-overs from dinner last night on the plane. Ick!

This semester at University I am doing two history papers (one on German history and the other on US history) as well as two geography papers, and no Philosophy which sadly might mean that my Philosophical insights which you all so love (or hate?) may be replaced by my historical point of view on the USA in the 60s. The good news I suppose is that more essays beckon for my site as I have to write two 2,500 word essays in history (for only one paper!) and possibly the same in the other as well as at least one geography essay. Lots of hard work for me coming up, but lots of interesting reading for you (if anyone actually reads the essays that I post?) Anyway, I'm running out of cash on my net-account at University and the bus is sure to come soon.... talk later :)

I'm in Sydney now, and once again it has been a while since I wrote anything but c'est la vie. It's kind of strange being in Sydney all my myself and without my family because it REALLY has suddenly kicked in that I am in Australia. Maybe it's because all the feelings that I associate with being in Australia have suddenly appeared: I am by myself, I am in Sydney and I am with Jannatun. These three facts have been what I associate with Australia in the past so that's probably why I felt that when I was in the Gold Coast it was actually just like I was in another part of New Zealand because these feelings weren't there.

The place I am staying at is pretty cool, only $120 a week which ain't bad considering they have all the services and you don't have to pay for water, electricity etc. Hopefully I can get to know my room-mates kinda well so that the evenings aren't really really boring and that I might not spend quite so much time here in internet cafes although they are pretty darn cheap!

Yes I am still alive, I've just been... well..... rather busy in the last few days. I suppose that I could go through a day-by-day account of what I have been up to, but that would take forever so I think that I will try and condense things a little bit.

Firstly the flight went pretty well, for once they played a decent movie, although it seems incredibly likely that I will get the same film on the way home just as has happened the previous two times I have travelled to Australia. Our accomodation at the Gold Coast was pretty good, on the 7th floor of one of those multi-floor apartments that you see everywhere at Surfer's Paradise. I also figured out the difference between Surfer's and the Gold Coast, in that Surfer's is PART of the Gold Coast (although I was pretty sure that was the case all along). ANYWAY!!! The next day (I thought I said I wasn't going to give a day-by-day account?) we went to Seaworld which is pretty cool as they have performing dolphins, seals as well as a couple of really awesome Polar Bears. Rides were pretty good.

Off to Dreamworld the next day which is the best of the Gold Coast theme parks. Full of pretty amazing rides! Then we had a few days that were a little bit quieter, and we explored the Gold Coast some more as well as going to a pretty cool South Stradbroke island. Then to Movieworld on Saturday, and yesterday (Sunday) we travelled from the Gold Coast up to Noosa where I went on a jet-ski for the first time which was VERY COOL.

There we go, I told you I'd keep it short. Hopefully it won't be another 2 weeks before I get enough time to give a decent account of what I have been up to again.