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Ross and Rachel's Rocky Relationship
(Thanks to Tina and Sandra from Ross and Rachel's Fan Club for letting me use the summaries up to the 4th season :-)
R.G. & R.G. have had a very bumpy relationship and its been really confusing. Here are episodes where they got together.
The One Where It All Began (Pilot):
Ross, who's ex-wife Carol has just left him for another woman, and Rachel, who has just ditched her fiancee at the altar, meet again for the first time since high school. The fire of passion ignites inside Ross, who tells Rachel that he had a huge crush on her in high school. He then casually mentions asking Rachel out sometime. She seems excited.
The One With The Sonogram At The End:
Ross' ex-wife tells him that she's pregnant with his child. Ross helps Rachel sweep up Central Perk after closing time. Lamenting about each others' current romantic situations, Rachel lays her head on Ross' hand. Needless to say, Ross doesn't mind.
The One With The Thumb:
Rachel pokes fun at the way Ross over-pronounces every word (Ross: "There's nothing wrong with speaking correctly". Rachel: "Indeed there isn't"). Ross gives her a dirty look. The tension mounts.
The One With The East German Laundry Detergent:
Ross and Rachel do their laundry together at the local laundromat. Ross helps Rachel to discover a bit of independence, and she is so pleased with his help that she gives him a kiss. Stunned, Ross runs into the door of a washing machine. Afterwards, Rachel lovingly applies an icepack.
The One With The Blackout:
During a blackout, Joey encourages Ross to tell Rachel how he feels about her. Meeting her out on the infamous balcony, he begins to ask her out when a stray cat jumps on him from behind. The moment ruined, Rachel goes off to find the owner of the cat and meets a handsome Italian man, Paolo. She brings him back to the apartment, where Ross tells him to stay out of the way. When the lights come back on, Ross sees Rachel making out with him. A definite low point in the relationship.
The One Where Nana Dies Twice:
At his grandmother's funeral, Ross takes one too many pain pills and gets a bit woozy. He tells all his friends how much he loves them, and then secretly confides in Rachel 'I love you the most. Rachel, thinking its just the drugs talking, playfully replies 'Do you know who I love the most? You!' Ross, upset with the misunderstanding, wails 'You don't get it!' and passes out in her lap.
The One With The Monkey:
Rachel confides to the group that by their second date, Paolo had already named both of her breasts. When she asks if she said too much, Ross dejectedly replies 'Just a smidge.'
The One With Mrs. Bing:
Chandler's mom comes to visit, and the group goes to dinner at a Chinese restaurant. Rachel arrives late with Paolo, saying that they 'just lost track of time.' Ross starts downing tequila shots, and ends up kissing Chandler's mom.
The One With The Dozen Lasangas:
Paolo goes to Phoebe for a massage and makes a pass at her. Finally seeing the light, Rachel breaks up with him. Ross goes out to the infamous balcony to comfort her, and tells her she deserves someone who knows what they have when they have her. They embrace. Rachel then tells Ross that she is swearing off guys for a while. Ross tries to convince her otherwise to no avail.
The One With The Candy Hearts:
Depressed about the Rachel ordeal, Ross asks a good-looking woman from his building out on a date, while Rachel and the other girls have a 'boyfriend bonfire.' Ross runs into his lesbian ex-wife during his date, where he tries to patch things up with her. It's a no-go, since she is a lesbian. Rachel makes a date with one of the firemen who helps put out their out-of-control bonfire, not knowing that he's married.
The One With The Poker:
The whole crew has a poker game together. In the first game, Rachel gets upset that the guys get such a kick out of taking their money. Ross tells Rachel that once the cards are dealt, he ceases to be a 'nice guy.' Rachel tells the other girls she thought he was being a jerk. In a subsequent poker game, Rachel refuses to show her cards to Ross after he folds, causing him to get angry. During the next hand, Rachel gets a phone call telling her that she has been turned down for the job offer she wanted. Ross, noticing her obvious sadness, intentionally folds the winning hand to let Rachel have the pot.
The One Where The Monkey Gets Away:
Ross and Rachel have dinner together alone, where she tells him that she wants to be with someone. Ross, about to bear his soul, is interrupted by the other four friends returning home from a movie. The next day, Rachel accidentally lets Ross' monkey loose in the apartment while looking after him. She then unwittingly calls Animal Control, not knowing that the monkey is an illegal animal. Ross is furious with Rachel, but every-thing turns out OK. Alone once again, Ross pours wine for the two of them and dims the lights. Rachel puts her hand on his leg. Ross begins to tell her how he feels, when Rachel's ex-fiancee walks through the door and tells her that he still loves her. Ross proclaims: 'We have got to start locking that door!'
The One With The Evil Orthodontist:
Ross storms out of Monica's apartment after hearing about Rachel's fling with the man she left at the altar. Oh dear.
The One With The Ick Factor:
Rachel has erotic dreams about Chandler and Joey, leading Ross to get extremely jealous. While she is asleep on Monica's couch, he gets up to leave and covers her up, when she moans 'Oooooohhhhhh Ross!' Overjoyed that she is dreaming of him, Ross begins to dance on the table and falls into her lap. She wakes up, confused about the situation. She puts her hand on his chest, and he tells her 'I'm here.' Then his beeper goes off, as his ex-wife goes into labor.
The One Where Rachel Finds Out:
Chandler tells Ross move on and forget about Rachel. Ross goes to China on a business trip, leaving a present behind for Chandler to give to Rachel for her birthday. When she opens it, she finds that it is an expensive brooch like the one her grandmother had when she was little. She says she can't believe that he did this for her, at which point Chandler lets it slip that Ross is in love with her. Rachel rushes to the airport to talk to him, but barely misses him. A few days later, while having drinks with another guy on the infamous balcony, Rachel begins daydreaming about Ross. On the day his flight arrives, she runs to meet him with a bouquet of flowers... when he gets off the plane with another woman.
The One With Ross's New Girlfriend:
Ross tells Chandler he never would have gone for it with the new woman--Julie--if Chandler hadn't told him to get over Rachel. Rachel, upset about the turn of events, sleeps with Paolo again. Joey tells Rachel that she needs to tell Ross how she feels. She meets him out on the infamous balcony, where Ross tells her how much he hates Paolo and that she needs to be with someone that makes her feel good--like Julie does for him. Rachel, speechless, decides not to tell Ross how she feels.
The One With The Breast Milk:
Monica goes shopping with Julie, and Rachel gets jealous. Monica tells Rachel that if she gave Julie a chance, she would like her. Rachel and Julie talk, and Julie asks Rachel if she'd like to see a movie some time. Rachel says that would be great. Julie then leaves, and Rachel mutters, 'What a manipulative bitch.'
The One With Phoebe's Husband:
Ross asks Rachel how long she has been in a relationship before having sex. Rachel deduces that Ross hasn't done it yet with Julie, and tells him that he should wait. Ross takes Joey's advice instead, who tells him to do it as soon as possible. The gang hangs out at Ross' apartment, where Rachel tries to stall the two so they won't have sex. On her way out, Rachel tells Ross that if it were her, she would want him to slowly kiss her, and then look in her eyes as if something amazing were about to happen. Ross seems entranced. The two get close, as if about to kiss, and then Ross says 'Thanks, Rach. Goodnight,' and shuts the door.
The One Where Ross Finds Out:
Rachel hears that Ross and Julie are going to buy a cat together and gets worried their relationship is getting too serious. She goes out on a date and gets toasted, and can't talk about anything but Ross. Her date convinces her to call him and tell him how she feels. She calls him from the restaurant and leaves a message on his machine. The next morning, he comes by her apartment and checks his answering machine from there. Rachel remembers the message she left and tries to stop him from hearing it, embarrassed. But he does. They start to talk, but he has to leave with Julie. Later that night, Ross shows up at Central Perk and gets upset with Rachel for disclosing her feelings because he is unhappy with Julie now. The two argue in what has got to be one of the best scenes that has ever been on television. He leaves, and she locks the doors and begins to cry. Just when we think the episode is over, he comes back, and they share one of the most long-awaited kisses in television history. Talk about your good days.
The One With The List:
Ross, forced to choose between Rachel and Julie, takes Chandler's advice and makes a list of the negative sides of both women to help him decide. He decides to break up with Julie for Rachel, and at first everything seems great until Rachel sees the list on Chandler's computer. She is so enraged by seeing her negative points on his list that she wants nothing to do with him. He tries to make it up to her by requesting U2's 'With or Without You' for her on the radio, but she calls the radio back and tells them to stop playing it. Talk about your bad days.
The One With Phoebe's Dad:
Sensing that Rachel is still upset with him about the infamous list, Ross convinces her that she'll feel better if she makes a list of his faults. She tells him that he is obsessive, gutless, whiney, and that he uses too much gel in his hair. Ross is taken aback, but it looks like the wounds are healing between these two young lovers. However, Ross may have made a bad decision buying Rachel a Slinky for Christmas. Nevertheless, it looks like the most-watched romance in television is on the verge of a major breakthrough!
The One With Russ:
Rachel tells the group that she no longer has any feelings whatsoever for Ross. She then introduces them to her new date, Russ, who looks and acts much like Ross... however, Rachel fails to notice the similarities. When it finally becomes clear to her that Russ and Ross have more in common than just their names, she promptly dumps him. Russ then falls in love with Ross' ex-girlfriend, Julie
The One With The Prom Video:
Rachel tells Ross that they will never be a 'thing,' and that he had to accept it. After spending the rest of the day in emotional hell, Ross returns to Monica's apartment to find the entire gang watching an old video tape of Monica and Rachel's senior prom. In the video, Rachel's date has stood her up and Monica's father talks Ross into asking Rachel to the prom. Ross puts on his father's tux, and is just about to ask Rachel to the dance when her date shows up, and she leaves with him. Rachel is so touched by what she sees in the video that her feelings for Ross come rushing back in a huge torrent, and she walks up to him and kisses him full on the mouth, signalling the beginning of a new era in her life... The Age of Ross.
The One Where Ross and Rachel... You Know:
Ross and Rachel. Together. Finally. Having planned to go to a romantic dinner and then come back to Rachel's apartment for... dessert, Ross ends up having to straighten some business at the museum he works at, and Rachel tags along Unfortunately, his business takes longer than he had expected. Fortunately, they end up hitting it in the astrology exhibit at the museum. They wake in the morning to see a group of young kids on a field trip who are, needless to say, shocked by the two naked people in the exhibit. Be that as it may, it doesn't change the fact that Ross and Rachel are now officially more than just 'friends.'
The One Where Joey Moves Out:
Rachel and Phoebe decide to get tattoos, but Rachel finds out that Ross doesn't think they are very appealing. Rachel accompanies Phoebe to the tattoo parlor, and expresses her second thoughts. Phoebe (apparently in an act of insane jealousy over Rachel's relationship) asks Rachel 'Is this how this relationship is going to work? Ross equals boss?' Not wanting to look like a wimp, Rachel proceeds to get a small heart tattooed on her hip. She is extremely upset when she finds out that Phoebe chickened out at the last minute. Ross walks in on Rachel as she is proudly displaying the tattoo to Monica and her new boyfriend, and is upset that Rachel got the tattoo. After staring at it intensely, though, Ross realizes how sexy it is and he and Rachel spend the next few hours in Rachel's bedroom. Talking, I'm sure. :)
The One Where Eddie Moves In:
Rachel becomes mildly upset with Ross for acting childish around Monica. However, the two look as close as ever... all is well in paradise.
The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies:
Ross and Rachel finally sit down and have a serious heart-to-heart talk about Rachel's feelings for Paolo. The conversation ends well when Rachel beats Monica in rock-paper-scissors in order to obtain the last condom in the apartment.
The One Where Eddie Won't Go:
Rachel reads a self-empowerment book that refers to men as 'lightning-bearers' and urges women to stop letting males steal their wind. Ross comes to take her to a movie, and she begins to feel that he is oppressing her. 'How can you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow?' she asks. To which an aroused Ross replies, 'You know I don't have a problem with that.' Book or no book, things are going just fine for America's hottest couple. Stay tuned!
The One Where Old Yeller Dies:
Rachel becomes nervous when Ross slips up and tells her that he has planned out the rest of their lives together (Ross, didn't anyone ever tell you that women don't like that stuff?) This leads to an argument where Rachel tells him that she doesn't want anyone planning her life for her, and Ross telling her that he is the type of guy who is not going to stop planning to spend the rest of his life with the woman he truly loves. This momentous conversation ends with Ross and Rachel exchanging those three little words that mean so much.
The One With The Bullies:
Very little to report this week, folks. Ross and Chandler encounter two middle-aged bullies at the coffeehouse, leading Ross to get an affectionate hug from Rachel after he tells her the story.
The One With Two Parties:
Rachel's birthday party turns into mayhem when her newly-separated mother and father both show up. Feeling down about the breakup, Rachel turns to Chandler for advice, who in turn turns her over to Ross for comfort.
The One With Barry and Mindy's Wedding:
Ross accompanies Rachel to Barry and Mindy's wedding... Barry, of course, being the man that she left at the altar waaaaayyy back in the pilot episode. Barry, still hurting from her rapid exit from their ceremony, pokes fun at her during his speech. Ross stands up for her at first, but Rachel decides that she needs to stick up for herself and tells him off at his own wedding. We sure have come a long way... I remember when Rachel couldn't even protect her own laundry cart.
The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy:
Rachel convinces Ross to reveal his deepest sexual fantasy to her... a fantasy which she later reveals to Phoebe. See, it seems that Ross--along with every other male in the free world--has this little hang-up about Princess Leia in her slave outfit from Return of the Jedi. Well, Ross decides to share his secret with Chandler and in return Chandler tells Ross that he sometimes pictures his mother while he's having sex. Ross is shocked and disgusted, but when Rachel finally shows up in the gold bikini, Ross can't seem to get his mother out of his mind. Ohhh Ross... you're letting the hottest babe in New York slip away. The final days of the Age of Ross are not far away.
The One Where No-One's Ready:
In a hurry to get the whole gang ready for a museum benefit, Ross blows up at Rachel due to her inability to get dressed on time. Humiliated and angry, Rachel decides not to go to the benefit. But Ross' nice-guy mentality proves to win out here when he chooses to drink a disgusting glass of meat fat in order to show her how much he wants her to be there. Of course, Rachel stops him before he can quaff the concoction, and the two end up going together happily ever after... Rachel sans underwear, no less.
The One With The Jam:
Ross and Rachel give Chandler some friendly advice to help him out with his relationship with Janice, and Ross privately teaches Chandler the hug-and-roll maneuver to avoid cuddling after sex. When Chandler tries the move on Janice, however, she falls off the bed. The next day, Janice lets it slip to Rachel that Ross taught Chandler the move. Rachel is upset with Ross because she had thought of them as "cuddly sleepers."
The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel:
Rachel becomes moderately annoyed with Ross' unwillingness to accept the fact that his son is playing with a Barbie doll rather than a more masculine doll. Luckily, the week's major revelation--that Ross used to dress up as a girl when he was younger--does not become disclosed to Rachel.
The One With Frank Jr:
Ross and Rachel trade lists of the five celebrities who they would be allowed to cheat on each other for. Rachel's list includes Parker Stevenson, Sting, Daniel Day Lewis (?), John F. Kennedy, Jr., and Chris O'Donnell. Ross gives plenty of though to his list, finally deciding on Uma Thurman, Wynona Ryder, Elizabeth Hurley, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Dorothy Hammill (to which Rachel notes, "You do realize that she only spins like that on ice?") One of Ross' original inclusions, Isabella Rossalini, coincidentally happens to show up at Central Perk after Ross has laminated his list. Rachel doesn't believe him when he tells her that had he not taken her off the list, he would go up and flirt with her. Rachel allows him to use her as an alternate, and he is quickly shot down by Rossalini. He then runs into the waiting arms of Rachel.
The One With The Flashback:
We learn that prior to Ross and Rachel's hot love affair, Ross nearly had sex with Phoebe on the pool table of the closed-down bar where Central Perk now stands. We also learn that Rachel at one time fantasized about making it with Chandler in the very same pool room before her subsequent wedding and the abandonment thereof.
The One With The Racecar Bed:
Ross has dinner with Rachel and her father, much to his chagrin. Rachel's dad shorts the waiter on the tip, and Ross swiftly adds another $20 to the tab. When Rachel's dad goes back to get a copy of the receipt, however, he notes the extra $20 and thinks that Ross is trying to imply that he's cheap. Rachel's dad tears up the check and leaves Ross to foot the entire bill. Rachel begs Ross to give it another chance at getting along with Dr. Green, because she already has a mother and a father who have to be kept separate and she doesn't want Ross to have to do the same. The three of them have brunch at Rachel's apartment, and Ross and Dr. Green realize that they do have one thing in common: nagging Rachel. Rachel is a little peeved that Ross has to resort to picking on her in order to break the ice with her father.
The One With The Giant Poking Device:
Ross becomes reluctant to leave his son Ben with Rachel for the day when he has to go to the museum for urgent dinosaur business. Monica assures him that she'll be there the whole time, further accentuating Ross' lack of trust in his girlfriend. While watching Ben, Monica accidentally bangs his head against the ceiling and gives him a hefty bruise. When Ross gets home, he is quick to lecture Rachel on how careful she has to be when watching babies. Defending herself, Rachel points out that Monica was the one responsible for the bump and Ross capitalizes on Monica's guilt.
The One With The Football:
The six go out to play a friendly game of football, which turns into an intense competition between siblings Ross and Monica. Ross' competitivity leads him to trade away Rachel, who is shocked and saddened by the fact that she was traded away by her own boyfriend. Bad move, Ross. Anyway, Rachel gives him his comeuppance when she catches the game-winning pass, even though she neglects to actually bring the ball into the end zone. The football game ends in a draw, but the real loser is Ross... trading away the woman you love, even in a friendly football game, is a bad idea.
The One Where Rachel Quits:
Chandler and Joey convince Rachel to quit her waitressing job at Central Perk after two and a half years of screwing up orders. Unwittingly, Chandler and Joey have set in motion a chain of events that will ultimately lead to the destruction of the most heralded union in all of television history. But don't blame them, they know not what they do.
The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister:
Mark makes his slimy entrance into Rachel's life. While she's sulking over her job prospects, Mark offers her his card and tells her that he may be able to get her an opening at Bloomingdale's. Rachel is very excited, but Ross instantly suspects that Mark wants an opening of his own: "Sounds like Mark something wants to have some sex!" Ross becomes jealous, and Rachel becomes a bit ticked off at his possessiveness. Monica tells Ross to trust her and grow up, but Ross can't shake the feeling that Mark something-or-other is going to serve as a major impediment to his happiness. And in a way, he's right.
The One With All The Jealousy:
Rachel starts her new job with Mark at Bloomingdale's. Threatened, Ross sends her a vast array of love tokens, including a musical bug and a huge picture of himself with the caption "I Love You This Much." A thoroughly disgusting display of overaffection if I ever saw one. He then sends a barbershop quartet to her office to sing about how much he loves and supports her. Upset by his obvious marking of territory, Rachel tells Ross that if two people love each other as much as they do, there should be no reason for jealousy. These very words come back to haunt her when Ross makes a playdate with a single stripper mom. Rachel tries to hide her jealousy, but Ross sees through it, casually remarking "I love you too" when he notices how uncomfortable she is letting him go on this playdate. Rachel plants a remarkable kiss on him before he leaves, leading Chandler to add, "Way to go. You've just turned him on and sent him off to a stripper."
The One Where Monica and Richard Are Friends:
Ross becomes a bit agitated that Rachel has been working late. Rachel appeases him by agreeing that for every night he is asleep before she gets home, she'll wake him up in a way "that has proved very popular in the past." Ahhh, sexual favors. The core of every meaningful relationship.
The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner:
The foundations of Ross and Rachel's love are crumbling fast. Nearly their one-year anniversary, and yet time is running short. This week, Ross' jealousy resurfaces tenfold when he refuses to accept the fact that Rachel and Mark are just friends. Ross sees no reason for Rachel to be hanging out with Mark, since he had quit Bloomingdale's. Rachel, simply trying to form a life for herself that doesn't include Chandler, Joey, Monica, Phoebe, and Ross, attempts in vain to convince Ross that her and Mark are going to attend an innocent fashion lecture. Ross opts to go with her to the lecture himself, during which he promptly falls asleep. After they get home from the lecture, the two argue about who's profession is the least exciting. Rachel calmly tries once again to make it clear to Ross that she wants to have her own life as well as a life shared with him, a perfectly understandable request. Ross pretends to validate her feelings, but a glimpse at the camera while they embrace reveals that he doesn't want to let Rachel have her own life for fear that he won't be included in it. The die is cast, the trap is sprung... and the once burning fires of the Ross/Rachel relationship are reduced to dying embers. Sadly, this special friendship is doomed to failure.
The One Where Ross and Rachel Take A Break:
On their first anniversary, Rachel is confronted with a crisis at her new fashion consultant job. Ross can't believe he's being stood up on his anniversary, so he brings a picnic to Rachel's work to try and have a romantic dinner. Rachel flies off the handle with him, and later that evening becomes angry at him again for not apologizing. Ross says that he's not about to apologize for wanting to spend his anniversary with his girlfriend. Trapped between her boyfriend at finally having a job that she cares about and is good at, Rachel offhandedly remarks that maybe the two of them should take a break. Dejected, Ross goes to a bar where he runs into Chloe, the hot Xerox girl that Chandler and Joey have been lusting after for months. Mark calls Rachel and sees she's upset, so he invites himself over and tries to cheer her up. Chandler and Joey tell Ross to call Rachel and try to smooth things out, and Ross overhears Mark's voice at Rachel's apartment. Intensely hurt, he slams the phone down and winds up locked in a meaningless kiss with Chloe to the tune of U2's 'With or Without You.' Meanwhile, Rachel is desperately trying to get in touch with Ross.
The One The Morning After:
And so it ends. Gunther finds out that Ross slept with Chloe, divulges the information to Rachel, who cannot deal with the reality that the one man she had thought would never do anything to hurt her has slept with someone else. Ross defends himself by saying that he thought their relationship was dead, a technicality that Rachel will not let him slip out of. In one of TV's most heartfelt moments this year, Ross gets down on his knees in hopes that their love can be salvaged, but Rachel has been wounded too deeply.
The One With The Ultimate Fighting Championship:
Phoebe asks Rachel if she can fix Ross up with a friend of hers, Bonnie. Seeing as Bonnie is the girl who shaves her head, Rachel tells her to go ahead, sure that Ross won't like her. Unfortunately, it backfires on her, because Bonnie now has a full head of hair. After Phoebe confronts her about her continuing protests that they have to break Ross and Bonnie up, Rachel confesses that she didn't expect Ross to be happy so soon.
The One At The Beach:
Everyone goes to the beach, minus Bonnie, Ross's new girlfriend, who has to work. Now, the saying goes "While the cat's away, the mice will play," and this is certainly no exception as Ross and Rachel flirt with each other, what with toenail painting and dumping margaritas in glasses. (Don't ask about either of those.) Unfortunately, just as Rachel is telling Monica that something seems to be clicking with her and Ross, Bonnie shows up. The next day, Rachel convinces Bonnie to shave her head again. Of course, Ross finds out that it was Rachel who did this, and marches outside to confront her. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on which way you look at it), the reasons for this confrontation end up being thrown out the window altogether when, in the heat of the moment, the two end up kissing. Now Ross is faced with a dilemma, and 2 doors, for that matter: should he do the right thing and go with Bonnie, behind the door to his left, or should he go with Rachel, the woman he truly loves, behind the door to his right? God, it's like Wheel of Fortune. Or something like that.
The One With The Jellyfish:
We find out that Ross chose Rachel's room (well, this is Ross and Rachel). He then goes and breaks up with Bonnie, which takes a very long time. As Ross says, "I didn't realise how late it was 'till I saw the 5 o' clock shadow on her head." He then finds that, while he's been gone, Rachel has written him a letter. An 18-page letter. Front and back. He goes to read it, even though it's 5 in the morning, but unfortunately falls asleep reading it, which then forces him to bluff his way through the big make-up conversation, agreeing to something that he doesn't know about. He later finds out that he agreed to take all the blame for their relationship problems, which he decides he just can't do, and they break up again.
The One With The Cat:
After the horrible way in which they broke up again, Ross and Rachel have no choice but to start sniping at each other to cover up their true feelings. This comes out in 2 situations: The first one is that Ross convinces Rachel to call Chip, her old boyfriend from high school, when she finds his number left out. Unfortunately, it's for Monica. The second one is that Rachel gets Ross to apologize to the cat that Phoebe believes is the reincarnated spirit of her adoptive mother, when he tries to convince her that her mother doesn't reside in the cat.
The One With Joey's New Girlfriend:
Ross and Rachel are forced to show their love for one another in the one way you wouldn't think at all apropriate: making each other jealous and sniping at each other constantly. Ross goes out with a woman called Amanda, but it turns out that she only thinks of him as a babysitter. Rachel, on the other hand, practically is a babysitter to her date, Josh. He's a college student who keeps stealing from her. Both Ross and Rachel are eventually forced to admit to each other that their dates were less than ideal.
The One With The Dirty Girl:
Ross gets a date with a beautiful woman who works at his museum. Unfortunately, she needs to fire her maid and get a new one, and fast. Her apartment makes a bomb site look like it's the tidiest place on earth. Unfortunately, Ross can't deal with it and breaks up with her.
The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line:
Ross decides to play his music for everyone to hear. Unfortunately, it's crap (to put it mildly). This provokes a comment from Rachel about how she can't believe she let him touch her with those fingers. (Which brings up the interesting point: Why would Rachel be thinking of that? :)) Other than that, nada this week.
The One With Chandler In A Box:
Ross won't let go of the fact that Rachel exchanges gifts that she is given, because he takes it to mean that their relationship didn't mean as much to her as it did to him. She then gets out a shoebox with momentoes from their relationship, including a movie stub from their first date, an eggshell from the first time he made her breakfast in bed, and a bone from the museum the first time they were together. Unfortunately, Ross has to ruin the potentially reuniting moment by telling Rachel that you're not supposed to take bones from the museum.
The One With The Girl From Pougkeepsie:
Ross starts going out with a woman who lives in Poughkeepsie. Unfortunately, the travelling is killing him and so he decides to break up with her. Unfortunately, on his way to break up with her, he ends up meeting another woman who lives even further away (Nova Scotia, if you must know). Meanwhile Rachel, becoming desperate, asks Chandler to set her up on a blind date with one of his co-workers. I don't think I need to say any more than that. :)
The One With Rachel's Crush:
Rachel meets Joshua, a recently divorced man, and instantly develops a crush on him. This, as you can imagine, upsets Ross. Nobody notices it though (well, no one except the viewers, that is). After Chandler breaks up with Kathy, his latest love, in a way that is very similar to our two former lovebirds' break up a year ago, Rachel mentions something about their (Chandler and Kathy) "break" not excusing the fact that she slept with someone else, leading Ross to comment: "Well, if she thought they were on a break..."
The One With Joey's Dirty Day:
It is in this episode that Emily, or, as I like to call her, Ross and Rachel Public Enemy No. 1, makes her soaking wet (and I mean that literally) entrance into Ross's life. After Rachel promises to take her to the opera, Joshua asks her to the opening of a nightclub. Later on, Emily shows up at Monica and Rachel's (sorry, Chandler and Joey's), soaking wet and not very happy, to say the least. Rachel convinces Ross to take Emily to the opera, and they end up at a bed and breakfast in Vermont. Meanwhile, Rachel never gets into the nightclub because of a mix-up on the guest list. So, as you can probably guess, when she finds out that Ross and Emily have hit it off, she is not the happiest of people. This comes out later when, during a talk between Ross and Rachel in which he confidently says that he is over her, she jokingly punches him, he punches her back, then she deliberately lays one on him that would break his rib if it were any harder. Nevertheless, it looks as though the wounds are finally starting to heal between our favourite couple.
The One With The Rugby:
Ross gets into a heated discussion with two of Emily's friends about rugby and American football, which leads him to play rugby with them. Unfortunately, he's injured rather repeatedly, so Emily gives him tips on how to cause the others physical harm. Of course, when Rachel hears about Ross's rugby-playing escapades, she doesn't resist a chance to have a friendly poke at him. Other than that, Ross and Rachel keep a bit of distance from each other this week.
The One With The Fake Party:
Ross has a romantic night planned for him and Emily on their last night together, but Rachel puts a stop to that when she announces a surprise farewell party for her in an attempt to lure Joshua into a social setting. During this party, Emily and Joey have to kiss for the Spin The Bottle game - a lot, Rachel tries everything in her power to get Joshua to notice her in the romantic sense, and Ross is desperately trying to get out of there with Emily so as they can do the stuff he planned. Later on, Rachel finally tells Joshua how she feels, and he says that he feels the same, but that he's not ready to date so soon after his divorce. Then Rachel apologizes to Ross for ruining his evening, and convinces him that his relationship with Emily doesn't have to end.
The One With The Free Porn:
Monica convinces Ross to tell Emily that he loves her before she leaves to go back to England, which he does. And in reply, she says... "Thank you". Then, when she gets back to England, Emily calls Ross and tells him that there's someone else. Again at Monica's suggestion, Ross flies to England to fight for the woman he loves (although we all know who he really loves). But Emily, in the meantime, has flown back to New York to tell Ross that she's dumped the other guy. The episode ends with Ross and Emily talking on the phone.
The One With Rachel's New Dress:
Rachel tries to seduce Joshua, and ends up having to wear lingerie to a restuarant with Joshua and his parents in the process - don't ask. Meanwhile, Ross is worried that Emily will become a lesbian while she's in England with Susan. Ross, sorry, but Emily's not the woman you should be worrying about!
The One With All The Haste:
Rachel and Monica want their apartment back, and so to seal the deal, they kiss for one minute in front of Chandler and Joey! (You don't see the kiss, though, and I don't think it means that Ross has any competition from his sister. :)) Meanwhile, Ross decides to ask Emily to move in with him, but this proves to be an impossibility. Then he asks her to marry him... and she accepts. (When did this become "The Running Record of Ross and Emily's Way Too Speedy Relationship"?) When Rachel finds out about this, she is beyond heartbroken. A reunion between Ross and Rachel looks like it's brewing, believe it or not...
The One With The Wedding Dresses:
Rachel reacts drastically to Ross and Emily's engagement and setting the date for the wedding a month from that time (and I mean drastically), and she goes out of her way to try and hide it by asking Joshua to be more spontaneous. This escalates to the point where she asks him to marry her, but she instead ends up scaring him off. Ross gives her a couple of comforting hugs as a friend, but seems to be wanting to be a bit more than friendly towards her. Oh dear. Our Rachel's now not only alone, but the man she's truly in love with (who I'm guessing is truly in love with her as well) is marrying someone else. Don't you dare miss an episode of this show ever again.
The One With The Invitation:
Ross and Emily are mailing out invitations to their wedding, but when it gets to Rachel's invitation, Ross begins remembering the ups and downs of their relationship. When Rachel receives her invitation, she too remembers the relationship, and eventually RSVP's with "Will not attend". And Ross and Rachel both realise something while they're taking a trip down memory lane...
The One With The Worst Best Man Ever:
Joey and Chandler's duck swallows Ross's wedding ring. (Smartest animal I ever saw!) Unfortunately, in order to get the ring back, the duck must be put to sleep. And because the ring is a family heirloom, the duck goes to a better place. (If you ask me, they should have kept the duck alive and lost the ring - and that's not just to stop the wedding.) Meanwhile, someone finally snaps at Rachel because of her unresolved feelings for Ross. And that person's a pregnant Phoebe, of all people! Mind you, she is having severe mood swings. Unfortunately, this only results in Rachel becoming even more upset about the impending wedding.
The One With Ross's Wedding:
Ross, Monica, Chandler and Joey all go to England for Ross's wedding to Emily. However, Rachel and Phoebe stay behind in New York, Phoebe because she's waiting for her brother's triplets to be born and Rachel because of her love for Ross. However, after a conversation in which a slip of the tongue reveals that Rachel is still in love with Ross, Phoebe tries to turn her off him by reminding her of his faults (even about the amount of gel in his hair!), but to no avail. In fact, Rachel admits that she shares some of those faults, and that the relationship break-up was partly her fault. She decides that she has to get to London and tell Ross of her feelings for him before he marries Emily, saying that "it's not over until someone says 'I do'." (You go girl!!!)
Meanwhile, Ross and Emily are having trouble organising the wedding, to the point where at one stage the whole thing is called off. However, Ross does up the church with Christmas lights and everything, and the wedding is back on. (Damn!) While all of this is going on, Rachel is on a plane to London, telling a fellow passenger the motive for her trip, ie. her history with Ross, in all its entirety. The passenger responds to this with something along the lines of: "And it's quite clear to me that you were on a break!"
Anyway, we get to the wedding day, with everyone looking out for Rachel. Phoebe, after several failed attempts, finally manages to get through to Joey and warns him that Rachel is on the way to ruin the wedding. But Joey starts making out with one of the bridemaids (typical Joey), which leaves Rachel free to walk straight into the church, only to find Ross and Emily kissing, which makes her decide that she can't go through with telling Ross her feelings. As he spots her, Rachel says, "I just came to tell you... congratulations," and is clearly tearful as Ross sweeps her off her feet in a massive hug. So it's all over for the world's most talked about TV romance... or is it?
Little does Rachel know that Ross's hug has set off a Mount Everest-sized spark in his heart and doubts in his head. When they are taking their vows, Emily says hers with no problem, but when Ross says his, he gets just a little bit tongue-tied and says, "I, Ross, take thee... Rachel!" Everyone in the church is stunned, especially Rachel, who's been crying, and Emily, who looks at him furiously in the same sort of petulant manner she's been behaving in since they got to England. Of course, Ross realises his mistake and tries to correct himself, saying, "Emily, ha, Emily..." but it's too late. The vicar asks them if they want to continue, but of course, our Ross doesn't know what to do, because he doesn't have the slightest idea that Rachel flew halfway across the world because she feels the same way...
Season 5 (Thanks to Roni for Letting me use this part of Ross and Rachel's Rocky Relationship
501 The One After Ross said Rachel:
Emily is still in shock after Ross said Rachel's name, but the wedding ceremony comtinues, and the happy (?) couple is marrried. Right after the ceremony ends, Emily kicks Ross in the stomack, then locks herself in the bathroom after yelling at him. Rachel is thinking of asking Ross is it ment anything that he said her name, but understands from him that it didn't mean anything. She doesn't tell him how she feels. Later they realize that Emily ran out of building throught the bathroom window. Ross is devistated, and Rachel is still thinking that maybe he does love her, since he said her name. Later Ross is waiting for Emily at the airport, with Rachel comforting him just as the flight is supposed to leave. Ross understands Emily's not coming, and with Rachel's advice he decided to go to Athens by himself. But, what do you do with the second ticket? He askd Rachel to join him, and she, abviously thinking this could be her chance, agrees. She goes on the plane, but Ross forgot his jacket so he's going to get it from the airport, then he sees Emily who saw Rachel going on the plane. She's very angry and is running away, with Ross chasing her, and Rachel going to Athens on her own .......
502 The One With All The Kissing:
Rachel comes back from Athens, and tells Ross she had a great time, but later she tells everyone else she had a lousy time without Ross. She tells Monica to be in control of her love life. Later she decides she wants to tell Ross she still loves him, but Monica says it's a bad idea and keeps interrupting Rachel. Finally Rachel tells Ross how she feels. He is stunned and doesn't know what to say, because he IS married. Then Rachel starts to laugh and is histerical, probably due to severe embarassment. She asks Ross to forget she told him she loves him, and they both agree to let it go and go on as if nothing happened. :-(
503 The One With The Triplets:
Rachel is trying to get over Ross, with the advice of Monica, so she sets dates for herself and for Monica with male nurses. Nothing else happens, Ross and Emily are not talking to each other yet.
504 The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS:
Emily agrees to finally forgive Ross, but she's still in London and is willing to come to New York on one condition - that Ross won't see Rachel anymore. Ross doesn't know what to do, cause Rachel is one of his best friends, but Emily is his wife. He tries the help of a magic 8-ball, but this always gives him the "ask again later" answer ... At the last scene, before Ross has to tell Emily what he decided, Rachel comes in his appartment (because they were supposed to go to a movie). Ross tells her he has problems, and Rachel tried to help but Ross doesn't want her to know what Emily asked of him. She tells him that whatever it is that Emily want him to fix, he should just do it, because she's his wife and he loves her. Then Emily calls and Ross tells her that he can do that thing she asked for. Rachel is near him but doesn't know a thing about this thing he should do, so when he signs to her that everything is fine, she hugs him. He is confused, so he hugs her back while still on the phone with Emily. I wonder what happens next, because Ross will have to tell Rachel what Emily asked him to do ...
505 The One With the Kips:
Ross tries to tell Rachel what Emily asked him to do, which is not to see her anymore, but every time something gets in his way. Finally he tells her, and she gets very mad at him and storm out of the apartment, although it's hers... She starts to feel like Kip, Chandler's old roomate, she thinks she is going to be phased out. Later she and Phoebe start to organize a new group of friends. Ross makes up with Rachel by telling her he should be the one to leave, not her. But she says she still won't be able to see him, which is sad. They don't know what to do, and Ross says he's so sorry.
506 The One With the Yeti:
Rachel comes home from work and see everyone, including Ross, hanging there. So she goes to her room and wants to stay there, because Ross can't see her, but Ross insists she joins them, and she does. Then Emily calls, and Ross puts her on the speaker. Joey tries to hide the fact that Rachel is there too, and Emily said Ross should know by now not to see her. Rachel gets mad so she leaves for her room, when Ross tells Emily that Rachel IS there. She gets mad at him and tells him that when she'll come to New York she'll be able to watch him more closely. He says she can't watch his every move and that she has to trust him. She says she can't trust them, and they decide to break up and get a divorce. Everyone hug Ross at the end, including Rachel, to comfort him.
507 The One Where Ross Moves In:
This is where the Ross and Rachel plot begins to fade, and we see less and less of them together. Ross is kicked out of his new apartment because it belongs to a relative of Emily's, and he moves in with Joey and Chandler, and drives them crazy ... Rachel is hoping for Danny to ask her out, but when he does, she pretends she's busy and can't come to his party, all because she wants to have the control over the relationship and doesn't want him to ask her at the last minute. Don't ask...
508 The One With the Thanksgiving Flashbacks:
The gang is after Thanksgiving dinner, full from the good food Monica made, and they start telling each other about past Thanksgiving dinners they had. At one flashback, Ross comes home from college and introduces Chandler to his family. He than asks Rachel if it seems weird now that he's gone away from home for a long time. She says "not really!" and goes to a different room. Later then evening, Ross overhears Rachel telling Monice she will start dating older man, and that she is tired of high school boys. Ross gets the hint and instead of calling his parents "mom" and "dad", he calls them by their name, Jack and Judie. Monica makes fun of him in front of Rachel, so he does his angry act and leaves the room. And yet later that evening, Ross tells Chandler he will try to ask Rachel out and play her the new song they wrote. It's a good episode, you really should see it!
509 The One With Ross' Sandwitch:
Rachel takes a literature class with Phoebe, but she's not serious about it so always tells the teacher stuff that Phoebe told her about the books, until Phoebe gets upset because Rachel is getting all the credit for her ideas, so she tells her that Jane Eyre is about robots, and Rachel makes fun of herself in class ...
Meanwhile, someone ate Ross's thanksgiving-leftovers-sandwitch at work, and he gets freaked out about it and starts yelling at his boss for eating his sandwitch. His boss sends him to the shrink, which gives him tranquilizers and makes him take a year off work, to relax.
Also, Rachel and the others find Joey in weird situations while he's covering up for Monica and Chandler's affair. They start telling Joey he's a pervert, and he decides to take some of the blame off himself and therefore tells everyone that Monica is the pervert and that they (Joey and Monica) slept together in London and ever since she's trying to seduce him. Ross says "this is not good for my rage!".
510 The One With The Inappropriate Sister:
Rachel finally starts dating Danny, the new neighbour she had a crush on, but she finds out he has a, well, "weird" relationship with his sister. They always touch each other and stuff like that. When Rachel comes to confront him and break it up, he tries to convince her it's normal to have a close relationship with your family. Just as Rachel tries to be convinced, Danny's sister calls him fro the bathroom, telling him to hurry up because the water is getting cold... This is of course the last straw and Rachel storms out of there ...
511 The One With All The Resolutions:
It's the new year and every one is making resolutions for the next year. Rachel promises to stop gossiping and Ross promises "no more divorces this year!", but he is reminded that he is STILL married to Emily, he says "just this divorce on 1999!". Rachel is having a hard time keeping her resolution as she accidently picks up the phone and hears Monica and Chandler talking. She wants to tell Joey what she knows but she can't because she can't gossip. At the end they both find out that they both know about Monica and Chandler. Ross will also have a hard time keeping his promise, but let's keep it until the next season ... Everyone kisses at midnight, but Ross can't kiss Rachel because of their history, so he kisses Phoebe, Rachel kisses Joey, and of course Monica kisses Chandler.
Ross dates a woman named Elizabeth Hornswoggle, and wears to their date a pair of leather pants which look ridiculous on him. Later that evening he gets hot and he has some problems with his pants ... this is a must-see-moment, I can't even explain it ...
512 The One With Chandler's Work Laugh:
Rachel tries to finds ways to get Monica to confess that she is going out with Chandler. When she can't get her to confess, Rachel tells Monica that she knows about them, but Monica denies it. Rachel goes over to Chandler's apartment to confront them, but she over hears Monica talking to Chandler and decides not to.
Ross, still feeling down especially since Emily is getting married, hooks up with Janice. He thinks they have a lot in common and he tells her about all his problems and annoys Janice. As a result, she breaks up with him. This makes him feel better because he knows that if Janice dumped him, he really IS getting too whiny, and has to be stronger. He later tells Chandler he had a "thing" with Janice, and is surprised when Chandler is not mad, so Chandler acts like he's mad but forgives Ross, as a preparation for later, when Ross will hear about Chandler's relationship with Ross's sister, Monica.
513 The One With Joey's Bag:
Chandler and Monica give each other massages. Chandler doesn't want to tell Monica that she gives bad massages as it will hurt her feelings. She finds out that he doesn't like them and is upset that he lied to her. He later says he's sorry and explains that if there was an award for the best worst massages she would get it.
Phoebe's grandmother dies and at the funeral she meets her father. Phoebe asks him to meet at Central Perk and she tells him that she is his daughter. Joey is auditioning for a part in play and Rachel helps him pick out clothes for it. She shows him a bag that would look great with his new clothes. Joey says it looks like a girls bag but Rachel convinces him it's not. He grows really attached to the bag and ends up carrying it around everywhere. He thinks it would get him the part in the audition but it doesn't. The gang tell him that it's time to give up the bag.
514 The One With Everyone Finds Out:
This is the best and funniest episode of Friends I've ever seen. It starts in the Ugly Naked Guy's appartment's, soon to be Ross's, when Phoebe looks out the window and sees Monica and Chandler having sex. Rachel tells her she knows too. Joey tries to convince them to just tell the loving couple that they know, but instead Rachel and Phoebe decided to play with them, so Phoebe starts acting like she has the hots for Chandler and wants to sleep with him. Rachel uses her status as the roommate, and when Monica says she's going to do some "laundry", Rachel gives her a bunch of laundry to do, and Phoebe gives her a bag of quarters. Monica and Chandler realise that Rachel and Phoebe know abuot them, and decide to play with them too, so Chandler is acting like he wants to sleep with Phoebe. Them Rachel and Phoebe realise that Mon and Chandler know that they know, so they continue their act. This leads to Phoebe's shirt open, a kiss between her and Chandler, and finally Chandler breaking and telling everyone he loves Monica. Ross still doesn't know.
But not for long...
At the final scene he and his boss are at Ross's new appartment, Ross says he's ready to go to work and that the whole rage thing is behind him. Then he too sees out the window Monica and Chandler together, and he yells: "Get off my sister!!!!!!!"
515 The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey:
Joey is dating a girl who hits him (but in a funny way), but it hurts him. When his girlfriend start hitting Rachel, Rachel kicks her leg, which makes Joey have to choose between Rachel or his girlfriend, so he chooses Rachel.
Ross comfronts Monica and Chandler about their romance, and decides he's happy for them. Later, Monica and Chandler have a fight, and Chandler proposes to her out of self-pity. She tells him no and he's relieved. It's a very funny scene!
516 The One With The Cop
Phoebe finds a police badge and pretends she's a police-woman, but then the police man who's badge this is, finds her, takes back the badge, and asks her out. Rachel helps Ross buy a new couch and move it to his new appartment, which is difficult, because the couch won't go up the stairs...
517 The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss
Rachel has an interview at Ralph Lauren. She mistakenly thinks her interviewer, Mr. Zelner, wants to kiss her she so kissed him on the cheek. Later she comes for a second interview with an ink blob on her lip. Mr. Zelner is trying to hint to her she has ink there, so he points on his lips. Rachel thinks that again he's trying to kiss her, so she storms out all mad. When she gets home, Ross tells her she has ink on her lip, and then she realizes what a fool she's been at the interview. She comes in later to appologize, and Mr. Zelner decides to give her a change. Rachel is so happy that she want to hug him, but instead tries to shake his hand, but that too didn't work out because she accidently touched his ...
518 The One With Rachel Smokes
Rachel starts her new job at Ralph Lauren, but finds out that her co-workers make all the important decisions while they are on their smoking break. So she decides to smoke to, although she hates it. She then tries to convince her co-workers to stop smoking. They do for a while, but then start smoking again, and won't let Rachel join them because "she's doing so well quiting". Her boss tells her that if she caught Rachel smoking, she'll be fired. Ben is auditioning for a soup commercial, and Joey is auditioning the dad in this commercial. They both lose the job.
519 The One With Ross Can't Flirt
Ross likes the pizza delivery woman and wants to flirt with her, but realizes he's a bad flirter. He starts talking to her about gas and other stupid things, and later can't believe he said those things to her. Rachel tries to help him so she runs after the woman and convinces her to give Ross her phone number. She gives it to Ross under the excuse that the delivery woman thought he was cute and decided by herself to give him her phone number. Ross doesn't believe it, but when Rachel tells him the girl thought he was cute, he believes it. Also, there's a hilarious scene in which Chandler asks Rachel if when she and Ross were dating, it bothered her when Ross flirted with other woman. Rachel says: "No, no, it bothered me when he SLEPT with other women"...
520 The One With The Ride Along
Ross, Joey and Chandler go on a ride-along with Gary (Phoebe's boyfriend). Meanwhile, Rachel is at Ross's appartment getting things to make a Margarita, when Emily calls and leaves a message for Ross. She says she's supposed to get married the next day, but she wonders if she and Ross made a mistake giving the marriage up so fast. She wants him to call her. Rachel accidently erases that message, but decides the right thing to do is to tell Ross about it. She does, and he thinks he should call her, but Rachel convinces him not to, because she made him miserable.
521 The One With The Ball
Rachel gets a new cat, which costs her 1000$. It looks weird but she says it's a "purebred, show-quality Sphinx cat". This friendship quickly turns into horror as her new cat is not as cute and lovely as the one her grandma had, but a cat that hisses all time and scratches Rachel. She wants to get rid of it, but is having a hard time because she also wants to get her money back. Finally Gunther buys it from her (he'll probably buy anything that was hers...) at 1500$, and tells Rachel she can always come to visit him... and the cat...
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