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Star Trek: The Forgotten Sitcom

(On the drawing boards since 1975, its genius is realized only now)

Due to an unfortunate accident involving the Guardian of Forever and a severely curtailed budget for special effects, the crew of the USS Enterprise were sent back in time to the year 2002. After a brief period of homelessness and confusion and numerous attempts to return to their own time, they settled in and assumed new identities and professions.

Now, in the year 2005, most of them are living in a cheap, four-bedroom apartment in Burlington, Vermont:

Captain Kirk, who was always fascinated by the naval life, has taken a job patrolling the waters of Lake Champlain as the captain/narrator of the sightseeing cruise ship "The Spirit of Ethan Allen." Spock has grown out his hair and is now a tall, ponytailed cashier at the local health food store. Bones has a job at the hospital as an orderly, working the nightshift. Scotty found himself quite unhappily employed as a janitor at the local high school, which he deals with by drowning himself in scotch and hacking into the computers and changing the last names of teachers on the students schedules to things like "arseface" and "buggard." Uhura is holding two jobs: one as a part-time waitress at Hooters, and another as a telemarketer. Chekov has been finding and losing jobs on a regular basis, much to the annoyance of the rest of the household. Sulu took a bus out to Hollywood and is now employed as a stuntman. He periodically sends money and postcards, but has otherwise rejected the company of his former shipmates...

Due to the rising cost of housing in this up-and-coming city, Kirk, Spock, Bones, Scotty, Chekov, and Uhura all share their first floor apartment in the north end of Burlington. Their landlady lives upstairs; she is a middle-aged former carpenter with Tourette's Syndrome and lots of dogs. They would all rather be somewhere else.


Episodes




DISCLAIMER:

Paramount and Viacom own these characters and the name "Star Trek." We intend no infringment of rights, and we garantee that we are not making a cent off these stories. We're just trying to have a little fun, man! And we do that by making these guys play house. what's wrong with that?

Also, we feel the need to give props to the authors of "Bagenders" who provided the inspiration for this bit of silliness. Okay, more than inspiration; we practically ripped them off completely, give or take. Please check out their site if you like Lord of the Rings. It's absolutely wonderful.

Bagenders Home Page

Back to the USS Meavis

We also want to give a Big-Gulp of gratitude to Kahless for helping us edit the site and providing us with the most excellent banner up top. Q'pla! And yet more props to the wise uncle Mikey for his proofreading of episode four. Thank the world, we finally have a beta!


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