when i was about 6, my mom had an affair with my cousins ex girlfriend. she ignored me alot and i grew to resent her. this was the first time in all my life that i actually started to express myself and how i felt. i started throwing up, my mom took me too the doctor and he said i had a virus but it lasted for about 6 months so i think it was bulimia and i was making myself throw up because i couldn't keep my mothers attention.

late november my mom left. She said she was going to the store or something and i was making christmas decorations. she hugged me before she left, and i knew that was unordinary for her. the day before she made dinner and we watched Twins together. I wasn't at all worried when everyone was panicing that she was gone. I was relieved.

i stopped eating, and just watched alot of TV.

then my mom came back, and i thought things would be kool. we moved into this strange house in lockeford. it was very big and open and the ceiling was like 20 ft tall. the rooms were big squares with a single window and the kitchen was tiny and i would hide in the bathroom under the sink in this small cubbard.

I had my first friend and she was molested by her dad. It was really disturbing one day i went to her house unannounced and i heard weird noises coming from this trailer in their backyard, i seen smeared bloodstains on the side of the trailer and it was really dirty. I heard some voices and i ran home.

then we moved back in with my dads family.