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Poop.
Monday, 26 September 2005
pooooooop ; )
Mood:  flirty
Now Playing: ; ) i like heathers botom
Topic: ; )
The Life of Poopie
Kimberly Swindells
September. 22 /o5 9-4

Poopie walked into the room feeling like a nervous wreck. Now to make matters worse he would have to babble on about his problems to some shrink. Poopie sat down on the soft velvet red chair and took a deep breath. He was worried that he would confess all of his secrets to some stranger and he would just laugh at poor old Poopie.

“Hello Poopie,” the man in the chair across the room greeted. The room was filled with strange artifacts Poopie had never seen before. You couldn’t even see where a paint covered wall used to be. Now it was just a collage of different things. Poopie nodded at the man unsure of what he could say. “Why are you here, Poopie?” the man said gleefully. Poopie sat there thinking how this man could be so happy at such a tragic time in his life.
“Look at me doctor! I’m a mess. I feel like my life is useless. No one loves me or wants me around anymore. I’m nothing more that a crinkled up aluminum can,” Poopie confessed.
“Do you remember when this all started Poopie?” the man questioned.
Poopie looked down at his feet. He twiddled his thumbs not quite sure how to answer such a obscured question. “Well, I mean my whole like feels like a complete waste. I mean no ones ever been there for me. Heck my mother even named me Poopie. I sense some kind of resentment there,” Poopie sighed, “That isn’t exactly when it started. I mean I had a nice childhood, a wonderful one actually. I guess it happened after…. Well after… Cadence left me. Ever since then I’ve been in a glass case of emotion.”
“Explain to me about this Cadence girl. Did you love her?” the man said wearily.
“That’s insane. I mean love? Love is stupid. There’s no such thing,” Poopie shouted, “Ok maybe a little. But I’m telling you. She was a looker. The most beautiful girl I have ever laid eyes on. She had the most amazing blonde hair. It was sandy shade and as soft as silk. She had the most extraordinary eyes I have ever seen. They were the color of the sea. Well I’ve never seen the sea. But if I had to guess that’s just what it would look like. A beautiful aqua color wrapped around the blackness of her eyes. You would just melt. Well see the moment Cadence saw me she fell for me. Well what can I say I’m a tall glass of water, if I do say so myself. Actually more like soda. But you know what I’m saying here? Well we were in love. Head over heals in love in fact. I still remember our first kiss. It was amazing. If only I had lips you know? Well we had fun for that day. And then out of no were; she throws me away like yesterdays news. Like I’m some kind of trash, you know? Well it really hurt. Especially since she wouldn’t even throw me in the garbage. She threw me right on the side of the road. It was horrible. The cars were zooming by as fast as rockets. To me the slightest mistake could kill me instantly. I had nothing to do but sit there and wait for something to save me.”
“Hmmm… Yes… Continue,” the man uttered, sounding like he was barely paying any attention to Poopie. Poopie didn’t seem to notice. He had someone to talk to. And that was all right.
“Well I was laying in the street. Thank fully still alive. When I saw out of the corner of my eye a walloping semi-truck coming towards me. Now I’m talking colossally huge. Of coarse I did what any manly man like myself would to. I cried and yelped for help. It was gaining speed and I was going no were. I sat there petrified of what was going to happen. All I could think was could this be the end for Poopie? The truck was almost at my side. I knew soon it would be pressing over me and squishing me to little itty-bitty pieces of hunky metal. Which I know to all females would be quite disappointing. I mean a piece of vitamin stud like myself doesn’t deserve something like this. Just in the nick of time the truck came to a screeching stop, which was enough to make anyone’s ear drums pop. The light must have turned red because many people started walking past me. Two little brats even thought it would be fun to see how far they could kick me. They pummelled me all the way to the sidewalk. I was quite agonized and beat up. It was better than been squashed into an aluminium pancake that’s for sure.”

Poopie couldn’t believe he had opened up to this stanger so well. I mean Poopie had told his whole life story and he didn’t even remember this guy’s name. “I really should stop now. I mean give me some advice here doc,” Poopie said.

“Doctor? Oh sorry. You must have been mistaken. The doctors threw those doors over there. But it was really nice talking to you,” the stanger man got up and left Poopie shocked at his utterly horrible mistake. He was no longer open to sharing his feelings with anyone. He was so moronic to not think of asking the man his name. Poopie’s head hung low as he walked out of the doors to the room. He rolled down the long hallway looking at the purely white walls. Which were completely dull and boring to Poopie. It was a bad idea in the first place. Poopie rolled silently in his own pit or misery. Into the cramped elevator, out the entrance to the building, all the way to the sidewalk were all his troubles began. Poopie started to feel miserable. His carbonated tears streamed down the aluminium.
“No one wants an old rusted can like myself. My exterior may be made of 5% metal, but my heart sure isn’t,” Poopie sobbed. Behind him a man saw poor little Poopie and took pity on his condition. He picked Poopie up and nodded. As if he secretly new how Poopie was feeling. And Poopie was happy to have someone again. Even if he wasn’t as pretty as Cadence, and sure didn’t smell like her either, he was a good guy, and Poopie new it to. The man gave Poopie to a recycling center. The got a whole 7 cents for him too. And Poopie was made into a robot. Poopie is know a ruler of great power and goes by the name of Alkonabiankanowbie the Seventh. He is worshiped as a God too millions of people. I can proudly say Poopie has never been happier.

Posted by trek/kimberlyswindells at 11:45 PM EDT
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