Ok, because I was so bored

I had no other choice but to impale myself with sporks

and go on a World Tour.

This is me in Paris! OOOO AHHHH!

Here I am at Brogar!

(man am I glad there are no cactus here!)

Scuba diving in Costa Rica!

Is that a fuckin SHARK??????? RUN AWAY!! RUN AWAY!!

This is me in NYC

(ya cant see me cause im layin in the dirt)

I am back home now, but I will not soon forget the shark that bit my legs off!

Special Thanks to...

Troy, who when told of this action, gave me this exact look.

Then he laughed.

To Ben

One hell of an artist!

He gave me the $700 program that made this site

Aint he sweet!

And to The High Exhaulted Emperor and Ruler of The iateyour People...Zen

Without whoms quote I would not be complete.

When in doubt...clown it. When not in doubt, get in doubt and clown it.

Truer words were never uttered.

And finally,

the people at Lees Chicken,

who when heard about my plight,

gratuitously donated the sporks without hesitation.