At breakfast Lily pushed her food around her plate sullenly, as though resigned to her doom; while Sirius and Remus kept a close watch on Snape as they munched on sausages and eggs. Peter, totally oblivious to the anxious moods of his three friends, ate his breakfast in relative peace and was thankful for it. That was a rare treat when you had friends like his.

When the meal was almost done the moment Remus and Sirius had been waiting for arrived. The flock of owls flew into the Great Hall in a flurry of feathers carrying the customary daily mail. One owl flew over to Lily, dropping a note in her untouched porridge. She pulled it out, mopped it dry with her napkin, and unfolded it.

Lil-

Good morning! Come visit me after breakfast with Sirius, Remus, and Peter; you'll want to hear about their plan, as it involves you. They told me last night about the Snape fiasco, but don't worry- we'll get you out of it! Good luck with the play tonight; I know you'll be fabulous!

-James

As she refolded the note, confused, but happy and relieved nonetheless, Lily shot Sirius and Remus questioning looks. But, their attentions were directed elsewhere. Another owl had just dropped a letter at Snape's place, across the hall. The owl was one of those from the school Owlery, so there was no way to tell who'd sent it… unless of course you were the reader or the writer. The inside of that particular note looked something like this:

As Sirius and Remus watched, Snape put down the note and his greasy head swiveled to where Evilynna Villatry was seated with her entourage of female Slytherins. They were talking in an oblivious sort of way so that none of them noticed their secret observer. Evilynna was easily the most popular girl in the Slytherin house and sported thick jet black hair that fell loosely to her shoulders. Her eyes were a clear blue that remarkably resembled glacial ice. She was the best looking girl in Slytherin (which as many would point out wasn't saying much) and she knew it, so it was understandable that Snape's face wore a mask of confusion as he looked back at the note he'd been sent.

Then his head turned in the other direction towards the end of the table where Aaron Lestrange was seated, surrounded by the Slytherin Quidditch members. Aaron was to Slytherin what James Potter was to Gryffindor-- their golden, -er-, silver boy. He and Evilynna ("Evi" to him and only him, unless you had some strange desire to finish the school year on jelly-legs.) had a notoriously tumultuous relationship and it was rumored they stayed together only for the social status they each provided each other, but stay together they did, and Aaron would no doubt be most upset if he discovered his girlfriend was holding secret rendez-vous with other guys. And yet, despite all of these most foreboding reasons, Snape could not disguise his pleasure at the invitation, not even from the two observers across the great hall.

Soon people began to trickle back to their common rooms to get ready for their first classes, but when Sirius jumped up, pulling Remus along with him and collecting Lily and Peter on their way out, he headed up to the hospital wing. They found James sitting up in his bed, pouring avidly over a book.

"If I didn't know better, I'd think you were studying." Lily said, shooting him a grin, retaining her sense of humor even in the face of her own impending doom.

James looked up. "You know me too well." He laughed and held up the book: 1,001 Ways to Control Inanimate Objects. "I've found it, guys- 'mobilus arbore'. Then just use your wand to indicate direction. It's all right here." He handed Sirius the thick volume, still open, and jabbed at a section of the page with his finger.

"Why do I have a bad feeling about this?" Lily asked, suspiciously.

"Lily, you and I would both have a much worse feeling about Snape being in that play with you tonight- trust me." James said as his girlfriend gave a resigned sigh and sat on the bed next to him.

"You're right. I hate to admit it, but you're right. This isn't going to involve any major bodily injuries is it? Or land you all in detention for the rest of your natural lives?"

"It doesn't have to!" Sirius said brightly, looking up from the book at the same time James replied "Not major…" Lily glared at them both.

"I can handle this easily enough." Sirius continued, gazing back down at the page.

"Good." James looked at him happily. "Snape won't know what hit him- literally."

The day's classes seemed to drag by, until finally it was time for dinner. Curtain time was at 8:00, so the Marauders had a small window of opportunity to do their job, or, as Remus put it, Lily was toast. They all went down to dinner as usual, but this evening, the boys ate much faster than ordinary- which for them was saying something. They ran back up to the common room while Lily hurried off to get in costume.

"Come on, Peter!" Sirius yelled through the bathroom door, "We don't have much time!"

"Do I have to put this on?" Peter whined on the other side.

"Yes! Do it for Lily. And besides, haven't you ever wondered how you'd look as a brunette?"

After much grumbling, including "I am a brunette!" Peter emerged from the bathroom, wearing his normal school robes, shoes with spike heels, and a jet black wig.

"You look simply fah-bulous, dahling!" Sirius mock-gushed, clasping his hands in delight. "Now let's get going; it's almost a quarter till seven, and we have to beat Snape to that Oak tree!"

The three boys headed out of the common room, ignoring the occasional strange glance they'd get from whomever happened to be watching. They started down the sweeping staircase, but the staircases at Hogwarts were no laughing matter, especially not for someone who'd never worn high-heels before. (Or so Peter vehemently insisted as Sirius nodded patronizingly.)

Eventually, after the second time he fell, Remus grabbed one of his arms under the elbow and Sirius took the other- they were off with Peterella (Sirius had renamed him for the occasion.) dangling between them. By the time they reached the tree on the bank of the lake, they had five minutes to catch their breath and hurry up the tree. Peter stood conspicuously beneath the creaking branches as Sirius and Remus positioned themselves.

Remus leaned down to whisper to his friend, "Remember Peter- not until he's only twenty feet away or so."

"I know." Peter whispered back.

"Shut-up, both of you. Here he comes." Sirius hissed.

The night fell silent, save the gentle sound of water lapping at the lake's edge and the occasional creak of a tree branch.

Hidden behind the leaves and branches, Sirius was seated in the middle of the tree- at the top of the trunk, his wand at the ready, while Remus was perched on a thick limb, clasping and releasing handfuls of his robes out of nerves.

As Snape neared the meeting place he quickened his pace and Peter stiffened. When Snape was about fifteen feet away, he began to call out to "Evilynna", when suddenly "she" disappeared. He gave a startled cry and broke into a run until he reached the spot where "she'd" been standing, now marked only by a black wig, a pair of shoes, and a pile of robes. He looked frantically behind the tree, but saw only a rat scurrying up it onto an outstretched branch.

An outstretched branch?

Suddenly, with an almighty creak the tree began to move. Snape stood, petrified, as one particularly large branch reached down and picked him up clean off the ground the smaller outshoots wrapping around his ribcage like very bony fingers, pinning his arms to his sides. The branch moved up swiftly and then jerked down, causing Snape to feel more than a little nauseous. Then the branch pulled itself back like a catapult and hurled him, screaming, over its top, into the murky waters of the lake beyond.

As Sirius, Remus, and Peter climbed out of the tree they surveyed their handy-work. Snape was perhaps fifty feet out, thrashing about wildly. He seemed convinced that the tree still had a hold of him and was frantically trying to fight it off.

From the bank, Sirius grinned.

"Do you think he'll be alright?" Peter asked, a worried note in his quavering voice.

"Him? Yeah. He'll be fine. Don't you remember when he tried to shove James out of the boat on that first ride across the lake in first year?" Sirius grinned at the memory.

"And then James shoved him out instead." Remus put in.

"I have never seen anyone swim so fast!" Sirius chuckled. "So you see Peter, unfortunately Snape won't drown, but he also won't make the curtain call."

"Speaking of which…" Remus said pointedly, and the three boys headed back up to the school. They arrived in the great hall at a quarter till 8:00 and hurried to the front to get into costume. A stage had been transfigured at one end and as they rushed backstage to get dressed, the torches were blown out so that the only light came from the stars above.

"So, who do you think Romeo'll be?" Sirius whispered.

"Honestly? I have no idea." Remus whispered back.

They got in position and watched the curtain rise…