Gods smallest little Angel

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A mothers greatest loss

Angels poem

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My story begins by me being told I was pregnant. Little did I know my world would be tore to shreds In just a few short months.I went to the doctor for a ultra sound in my fourth month.I looked so forward to this appointment.After my ultra sound they sent me up stairs to talk to the doctor. He looked at me and said I am very sorry we found something wrong. I see that your child has a hole in her heart and said were going to send you to another doctor that deals with babies that have problems. When I went to this doctor he wanted to do another ultra sound to see what he could find out.After the ultra sound I got more bad news. The doctor said I see the hole in her heart but I also see water on the brain and that she will be downs.My heart dropped I thought this can not be happening. I listened to more of what the doctor had to say.Now he was telling me that he wanted me to have an abortion explaining to me that if I didn't her head would grow so big during the next few months. When she was born she would be so deformed I would not be able to look at her. He gave me a limited time to let him know what I decided.On the way home that day I was praying."God I cant do this I have always been against abortion but now with what the doctor said what do I do?" As I was driving home and praying for help I felt the baby move for the very first time almost to say mommy please don't let them hurt me. I knew that God had answered my prayer from that day forward I put Angels destiny in Gods hands. I went back to the doctor to tell him that I would not abort my baby. I explained to him only God can take her from me. I don't want to be the taker of ones life. It is wrong. My doctor looked at me as if I had lost my mind but never did he question what I said. Months went by and many ultra sounds were done all of them showing she was getting worse. The water on her brain was enlarging her head. I told the doctor she would not have water on the brain that god was going to heal her.Once again he looked at me like I had lost my mind.The time came for my child to be born. They had me hooked up to monitors. They were telling me that we were going to loose her that she was under distress. I spoke up and said she will not die God won't let that happen. At this point the doctor tells my preacher to go in and tell me that theres a chance she will die that I needed to be prepared. My preacher replied no! God will take care of her. I know my doctor thought this whole bunch has lost it.Well the time came to deliver the baby and as she was being born the look on the doctors face was amazing. Even though I couldn't see her as she was being born I knew the look on his face wasn't because something was wrong. I knew he was seeing a miracle. Angel was born with the prettiest small round head you ever did see. Angel did have a hole in her heart and she was downs but she was a blessing from God above. After she was born they sent me to my room. My doctor came in and sat beside me on my bed and we talked about what happened. I ask my doctor how he could deliver babies every day that had problems. He looked at me and said when I deliver a baby like yours. He told me that he had never in all his years of practice delivered a child that got to go in the regular nursery. Now you have to understand this doctor only delivered problem children. After they are born he is not suppose to have any other contact with the child or parent but he did me and my Angel.She touched him, God showed him what he could do. Every time Angel went back to the hospital for surgery he was there. He kept up with Angels progress all the time. When I couldn't go in I.C.U. he went in to see her and even brought her a stuffed animal to be with her. When the time came for god to take her home the doctor that delivered her had called up to her room to check on her. I had to tell him she was not doing well he told me he would be there to see her after while but Angel had went to heaven a few hours later. The doctor came during the time they were telling me she had passed away. He looked like he was going to burst into tears.I was told many things over her five months she was here. Everything the other doctors said she could not do she did them any way. She blessed many people in the hospital and blessed many people she met out side of the hospital. God gave me five wonderful months with her. I knew he didn't let me down. He honored my faith, He used her to bless people. Angels work on earth was done.She had one lovely older sister [Mandy Langford] and now she has three other sisters, Nicole, Amber and Breanna, all of them miss her as her parents do.