As we go through the different stages of recovery we eventually reach the anger stage, some stay here a while, and some come back to it many times. For those times, I wanted to include some tips for dealing with the anger of a victim/survivor. A lot of these have helped me tremendously in my healing. Anger can be a great leap forward if we express it, and get it OUT, so that we are not constantly fighting to not FEEL these perfectly normal, healthy emotions. I hope these can help you too.

• THROWING:
  
  • Throw nerf balls or rubber balls against a wall.
  • Throw darts (how about an image of the abuser on the board?)
  • Throw water balloons, eggs, pumpkins, sticks or glass (with a tarp) against a fence.
  • Throw pillows against the floor or wall, throw rocks into a river, creek.
  
  
  
• YELLING:
  
  • Scream into a pillow, scream in the shower.
  • Take a drive and roll up the windows, scream with the radio.
  • Scream in the woods.
  
  
  
• WRITING:
  
  • Write a letter to the abuser, don't hold back anything! let it all out, say not why? but" I'm mad at you because..., I hate you because..." then burn the letter or tear it up into tiny pieces.
  • Keep a journal! write down these emotions daily as they hit you. Keep your journal private.
  
  
  
• TALKING/PLAY:
  
  • Daydream or imagine a conversation where you let the abuser have it, tell them everything you feel, your anger, your betrayal feelings, "I want you to know..."
  • Talk to your therapist about your anger, maybe arrange a playrole for them.
  • Put a picture of the abuser up and tell them why you are so angry, and explain all the consequences and damages they've caused you over the years.
  
  
  
• KICKING:
  
  • Kick scissors kicks while swimming, these are very exhaustive.
  • Put a mattress up on a wall, and kick or punch the wall.
  • Stomp empty egg cartons, lots of them.
  
  
  
• PUNCHING:
  
  • Roll up a futon and stand it on it's end, then take a foam or rubber bat and bat away.
  • Hit furniture with a magazine or rolled newspaper.
  • Stack up pillows on your bed and hit them. Or stack up pillows on your headboard/wall, then lie flat and kick them against the wall.
  
  
  
  

  Most of All, RELEASE IT!