
Have you ever been in love, I mean really truely in love? I'm talking about willing to give everything that you have, ever will have, ever dream of having to this one person... Even if you haven't, just imagine you have, or do.
Now imagine that the person that you devoted yourself so totally to, just leaves you. Now what happens to this love that burns so fiercly in your breast. Something different happens to everyone that goes through it, sometimes they simply get over it, sometimes they lose all hope and end who they are. But whatever happens,they are never the same again.
I can talk about this because I've been through it. I was willing to give everything that was "me" to her, but it wasn't enough. It utterly destroyed me... I tried suicide (obviously failed), and then I simply went numb. Since then everything has been a kind of haze for me, I act normal around my friends, but when I'm finally alone, things change. My senses have even dulled, at least my ability to feel pain.
Have you ever had a wound so grievous that it bleed enough to... well... let's just say it was pretty bad. And I didn't even feel it. Well, there was this kind of dull sensation, I knew that I was hurt, but it was not the pain that I was accustomed to. I began cutting myself, and I just didn't care, the pain being gone, I didn't really have a reason to stop. Now I bear the scars for that.
I wonder if things will ever be as they used to. I'm over Misty, I now know that, but I don't know if I will ever really be "me" again. My heart feels like a lump of stone in my chest, and that's about the only thing that I really 'feel' anymore. I wonder what will happen to me in the end. It's the one mystery that I can't wait to see the ending to.