Wise words of the day-Eire mail
- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...
- 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who
can't.
- Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS.
- Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
- Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
- ...Every morning is the dawn of a new error...
- For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.
- I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.
- Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
- I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
- Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
- If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!
- If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to
drown too?
- If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping
me.
- Don't look back, they might be gaining on you.
- Help Wanted: Telepath. You know where to apply.
- Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.
- Do witches run spell checkers?
- Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved.
- Headline: Bear takes over Disneyland in Pooh D'Etat!
- What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.
- Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
- COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key
- Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.
- 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
- Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
- My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
- C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
- BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding
- BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!
- Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!
- C:\> Bad command or filename! Go stand in the corner.
- Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"
- As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
- Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)
- Backups? We don' *NEED* no steenking backups.
- ... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
- Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny
- CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C (Y/n)?
- 24 hours in a day...24 beers in a case...coincidence?
- Windows: Just another pane in the glass.
- SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .
- Press <CTRL>-<ALT>-<DEL> to continue
...
- Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.....
- Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...
- ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!
- Help! I'm modeming... and I can't hang up!!!
- All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
- Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
- "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill
Gates, 1981
- Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS
- Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
- Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
- Hit any user to continue.
- 2400 Baud makes you want to get out and push!!
- Will the information superhighway have any rest stops?
- Disk Full - Press F1 to belch.
- Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic
- (A)bort, (R)etry, (T)ake down entire network?
- (A)bort, (R)etry, (G)et a beer?
- Programmers don't die, they just GOSUB without RETURN.
- Real programmers don't document. If it was hard to write,
it should be hard to understand."
- Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.