if everybody says it, why isn't it true? i get those looks, and that innocent sounding questionnaire i've got assumptions up to my--never mind i've got about three people a week all indulging in conjectures and livin it up in the conspiracy of smiles hey it's cute and flattering but it ain't the way thangs is, baby and doesn't that piss you off i need to coordinate my reality and my imagination three cheers for confusion and illusion, but happiness truly arises from a cute little place called the real world, just mostly when things go right though i guess i could do something about my situation i'm right there, as we all know but i can't just bring it up in conversation: "hey, yeah, uh, y'know, what people are saying? why can't it just be true?" i did that in high school to a boy as a joke on our friends our buddies thought we were for real ...unfortunately, so did my fellow prankster .... now, these were two different boys, totally different i think one, for instance, was a leprechaun (we'll leave it at that) i seriously doubt the same method would work on him but wouldn't it be nice? if things were the same as everyone thought they were? this would backfire in a few instances: you would die if you didn't send along a chain letter, kentuckians would be shoeless pregnant incest freaks (i mean more so than usual), etc. ah, but who needs that silly categorical imperative make a small exception in my case .... what? me do something? that would destroy my philosophical perch from which i demystify and remystify the situations which make me want to write such demented verse plus that would hurt my feelings if the answer was no and i can't afford to lose friends ...or feel foolish if i don't feel that strongly about it, then maybe it's not worth worrying about but it's obviously worrisome enough to merit a piece of writing maybe just because it's current events and therefore fresh on my mind probably not who am i kidding i think about it more than i would ever admit but you won't tell, will you? you'll keep my secrets, right? good, glad to be understood. how do you feel about this? are you an intended audience? would you go tell him for me? pass him a note in study hall? i'm chicken okay the study hall thing is a lame joke, sorry besides, who passes notes these days? you can't send email without it being read by the government and scanned for revolutionary words notes passed in study hall are often read in transit i hate everyone knowing my secrets that's why i write them down --nobody reads literature anymore everyone talks everyone gossips i wish they'd stop they're making me jealous of my popular image and the more jealous i get, the more apt things are to change to tell the complete truth the more happy i would be though i do enjoy living vicariously through other people's opinions it saves me a lot of explanation