Random Nonsense

~Bio~

Scientists are developing new ways to change DNA, so that people can alter what their children would look like before they are even born. Some plusses to this are that the children will not have physical or mental illnesses or inherited diseases. I'm sure that most everyone has a gender preference for his or her child before it is born, and would like to be able to choose beforehand. I, on the other hand, do not agree with this life-altering process.

I don’t think that this should be performed for a variety of reasons. Tampering with life is wrong and not the way it was meant to be. If every person having a child altered the DNA of that child, making him or her smarter, pretty soon, the majority of the population would be smart, and the average intelligence level would go up. The select few, whose parents did not alter their DNA and turned out to be as smart as the average child is now, would be really stupid compared to all of the other very smart kids. In this situation, the people who refrained from DNA alteration would suffer. This would most likely convince those people to do it too. Pretty soon, all the kids would be smart and they would take over the world.

This would not only happen with intelligence, but with other things, such as physical traits. As far as appearance and gender goes, if everyone wanted boys, there would be a shortage of girls. Take a look at what is going on in China. Since there are so many people, all of the girls are killed and only the boys are living. Now, there are WAY more boys than there are girls. Again, I argue, it is best just to leave everything as it is.

~Lamb Purchasing~

Dear Henry Ungerbongle,

My name is Helen Hamrin and I am interested in purchasing a lamb. What do they run for these days? I think one of them in every room in my house will make my house a home. Do they come in different colors? Can I pick the size, shape, height, weight, etc? Can I get one custom made? Can you milk a lamb? I am 8 months pregnant, and the baby’s not due for about a month, and my milk is starting to come. So could I practice breastfeeding the lamb, so when I have my baby, I’ll be more experienced? Would that be lamb abuse? I heard that breastmilk Is pretty yummy. If the lamb did not enjoy the milk the first time, I wouldn’t feed it to him again, I swear. Do you think if I did this, it would waste the baby’s milk? Should I save all my milk for when the baby’s born? If I DID let the lamb suck on my boob, would it hurt? Do lambs have teeth? They MUST have teeth! Would the lamb bite me while I was breastfeeding him? Would he suck too hard? Would he suck me dry? When I was done, would all that’s left of my boob just be sagging skin? I better rethink this whole lamb-purchasing thing. Maybe I'll just get a sheep. I hear sheep are much safer, and now they have “Glow in the dark sheep” and “Mood Sheep”. Well thanks for your time Henry, and please reply soon.

Sincerely,

Helen Hamrin