Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!

Title: Shatterpoints.
Author: Erin Maloney
Rating: G
Distribution: The Archive. Force Haven.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. GL does.
Warnings: None from the movies. Refers to the RotS book and a revelation there about his hand in things.
Pairings: possible Obi/Ani.
Summary: Mace's reflections on his decisions regarding Anakin and Obi-Wan's pairing.
Author's Note: Number whatever in the drabbles series, though I guess I can't legally call them that anymore, can I?

Shatterpoints.

They are everywhere.
And it is my personal curse and blessing to see them.

That is why I insisted-yes, insisted-that Obi-Wan be given the rank of Knight.
In addition to the rank, I pushed for him to become a Master.
A Master with an untried and unready Padawan, Anakin Skywalker.

We do not always know the will of the Force but it brought those two together.

Qui-Gon always ran faster than was prudent or wise, yet many times, he saw clearly.
Clearly though many times, he did not see accurately.

The boy was not for him.
I do not think he was for Obi-wan either, but connected they were.
Vividly and brightly, bound by a power that took a path I could not see the end of.

Perhaps it was not wise for me to push Obi-Wan as I did.

Knowing him as I do, I didn't want him to be lenient towards his charge.
He saw, as did I, Qui-Gon in Anakin.

Dangerous similarities that would have kept Obi-Wan as a subordinate to him.
Not the dominate Master as he should be.
Perhaps, I should have let them find their own rhythm.

They are not Master and Padawan as they should be.

No, they are partners.
Partners separated by a vague idea of boundary lines.

Nothing more than that, an idea.
Obi-Wan and Anakin learned from each other, that was true.
But nothing between them was ever as it should've been.

I was prideful, knowing that I was right about this, about their pairing.

I know that Yoda did not feel it was the best solution to our problem with the boy.
He thought Anakin to old, to risky to be trained in our ways.

He didn't want them paired, seeing the unmistakable danger in this.
Danger that we ignored, thinking that we could contain it if it were in our midst.
Would that I had seen so clearly, perhaps the boy wouldn't have sough Palpatine.

Palpatine.

How the very thought of his name curls my stomach with anger, though I quickly release it.
For years, YEARS, he has deceived us all.

And we delivered the Chosen One to him.
We couldn't have been more obvious had we gift wrapped the boy and handed him over.
Over to the Sith who has been controlling the whole situation.

Oh, we expressed our dissatisfaction over Palpatine's continual friendship with Anakin.

But we did nothing to stop it.
Nothing more than speak against it.

We did not tell Obi-Wan to cut them off from each other.
In that, we expected him to take the lead.
A lead he was incapable of taking for we had crippled him.

Crippled him, crippled them, through our mistrust of them.

I did not listen to Obi-Wan's concerns over Anakin.
Never did we of the Council listen to him when he spoke of Anakin, thinking we knew best.

Thinking that we saw it all.
Saw the truth behind his words.
We thought it was a simple matter of not believing in Anakin.

Oh, if only it had been that simple.

Obi-Wan saw what we did not.
He knew that Anakin could not live life by songs or platitudes.

He needed to sing, to live, about something.
Someone.
Anakin Skywalker could not be content with just words and phrases.

He had to be a part of the music of life.

This, we could not perceive with any sympathy.
We could not comprehend why this was so with him.

For it is not the Jedi way to want to play a part in life in such a manner.
To integrate and be a part of something more, this was not something we sought.
In our misunderstanding of them and their example, we ignored what they were becoming.

We withheld from them even as we pushed them to be something more than mere Jedi.

Pushed them to be perfect, which they became together.
Skywalker and Kenobi, the Team all sought after and wanted to see.

Their names became synonymous with safety and rightness.
People knew, they just knew, that things would be all right once they arrived.
The Negotiator and the Hero with No Fear, they were what it was all about.

It was all anyone wanted to see of them, the new faces of the Jedi Order.

No one bothered to probe beneath the surface to see what lay underneath.
What pains, what secrets, their hearts hid from us.

From each other-and from themselves.
None of us wanted to know as long as they did as they were told.
We did not want to deal with it.

Hypocritical of us, perhaps but who isn't at some point in life?

Even the Jedi are not immune to this very human failing.
Why deny it?

Yet in this, we were more hypocritical than in any other case.
Why?
Because they were the New Jedi and we did not want to deal with them.

Instead of learning from them-or letting them learn from each other, we separated them.

It was our intent to catch Darth Sidious, so we asked Obi-Wan to catch Grievous.
Then we asked him to order Anakin to keep an eye on Palpatine and his acquaintances.

The sight of Obi-Wan's sickened and pained expression haunts me even now.
I should've known then that it wasn't the right thing to do.
Yet, what else could we do but this?

The way to peace was to get Sidious, not Grievous.

The way to Sidious was through Palpatine.
And the way to Palpatine was through Skywalker.

If that meant twisting their friendship, then so be it.
We would use any tool to attain the peace we sought after so long.
Twist or break that friendship, we knew that Obi-Wan would do this for us.

Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Jedi, he understands sacrifice.

He has made it his whole life's goal to do what is right.
To do his duty, even if it feels wrong to him.

And many times we have asked that he do so.
That he turn his back on his Master's teachings and follow our lead.
Would that the same could be said of Skywalker.

Loyalty to people, Kenobi said, loyalty to people, not ideas, is what drives the boy.

I watched them part that fateful day, seeing all to clearly what he meant.
It was all too apparent that the only thing physically stopping
Skywalker from going was Kenobi.

And even that didn't seem to be enough for him.
The lines of destiny swirled furiously about them, as though trying to tie them together.
Tie them so tightly together that no amount of distance, of enemies, could rip them asunder.

Not that they needed that binding for they were complete.

The pale, ghostly face of Skywalker at my door was something I had not expected to see.
Nor the desperate plea in his eyes and voice to talk to Obi-Wan.

I refused to even consider it for Obi-Wan had to finish his mission.
Skywalker told me the sickening truth that we should've known instantly.
Palpatine, the Supreme Chancellor and our guide to peace, was Darth Sidious.

How...blindingly obvious and maddening this truth was.

Maddening that we had become so full of ourselves that we did not see it.
Did not see, not feel, how close the Sith was to use.

Living right in our midst, he blinded us so easily.
We had grown to accustomed to acceptance, to luxury, that we never pushed the boundaries.
Never tried to extend our reach and grow farther than our own mandates.

Taking a trusted few Jedi with me, I went to arrest him.

That was my only intent.
Nothing would have been accomplished by his death.

Yet, he saw no reason to hide himself any longer and challenged us.
And in the end, his grip over Skywalker turned the tide of our battle.
He knew something, something that caused Skywalker to turn his back on us at last.

I saw the way he manipulated him.

Skywalker stood uncertain, unbalanced.
Undecided for who he should stand beside.

To late did I see this essential truth, to late to understand what Obi-Wan had meant.
To late to undo the wrongs that had been done to him by our actions.
It was always for Obi-Wan that he obeyed us.

It was never about or for us.

Never us on the Council.
Skywalker had little confidence or trust in us.

That was all Obi-Wan's, no matter what we did to them.
No matter how we pushed them apart, he clung tenaciously to his Master.
His Master was the one who held him on our side and we took that away from him.

As I fall I think, would things have been different had I let him call his Obi-Wan?

The End.

Back to Fiction Index