Title: Shattered Rose
Author: Di-Ana Wolf
Pairing(s): Obi-Wan/Anakin, Anakin/M
Archive/Distribution: CoC, fanfiction.net, O-A archive; fabulae, and M_A if they want it. Anyone else, please ask.
Summary: Companion piece to "Branded by Roses". This one is mostly Obi-Wan's perspective.
Warnings: If you need "c" with your "h" this fic is not for you. Still no happy ending and a rare appearance by NoTears!Obi.
Feedback: Roses are red, violets are blue, a naked Jedi in bed, is what feedback gets you. (*Ahem* Yes, please onlist or offlist, but constructive crit offlist please.)
Disclaimers: Anakin and Obi-Wan belong to George. All hail George. No money being made off this, don't sue.
Thanks: to you for reading it, to angel and Athena for betaing it, and to all of CMW *mwuah* Love you guys.
Authorís Notes: Response to "Angsty Anakin in August" Challenge from the O-A list.
_ denotes italics and Obi-Wan's dream sequence _
* denotes emphasis *
Obi-Wan had gotten out of the Council meeting early, they were in deliberations about sending a team of Jedi to a remote planet that he had visited as an apprentice. He told them what he knew about the planet and left them to their deliberations.
Using a brief flicker of the Force, he located his own Padawan, Anakin, in one of the areas designated for off-duty Padawans. As he walked through the halls of the Temple, he thought about what an early night meant for them. A beautiful candlelight dinner in their quarters and then making love for the rest of the night. Anakin would definitely be excited about that. At 18, Anakin's hormones were right where they should be, impossibly high.
Remembering what his own hormones had been like when he was 18, Obi-Wan smiled to himself. He rounded the corner that lead to the Padawan area when he heard the first voice.
"I dare you to kiss Tir."
Obi-Wan's footsteps slowed down. He could remember the games he had played as a Padawan, and while harmless, that voice unnerved him.
"No way." Anakin's voice.
"It's just a kiss, Ani." A female voice.
"C'mon Ani, it's a *dare*! Are you chicken?" The same speaker as earlier.
More voices chimed in, and then he heard the grumbled reply of, "Alright, but *just* a kiss."
Obi-Wan knew these rooms sometimes doubled as sparring areas when all the salles where reserved, and thus would have a room to the side where Master's could watch and hear the voices clear as day. It was a grievous infraction of his Padawan's privacy, but Obi-Wan had to know. He glanced around quickly and spotted the door that would lead to that private room where he could watch and listen without being seen.
He punched in his code and the door swished open. It was thankfully empty as Obi-Wan touched the small pad next to the window, allowing him to hear all that was going on in the room.
Obi rested his hands against the windows, watching as an attractive blonde boy kissed his Anakin. 'That must be Tir,' he thought to himself. He continued to watch, small amounts of icy dread slipping into his blood while Tir lifted his arms and wrapped them around Anakin, pulling him closer, pulling his love closer. Their bodies were so close now that Obi could hardly determine where one ended and the other began.
When a burly brown-haired boy took Anakin's arms and forced them back, the muscles along Obi-Wan's shoulders tensed. Anakin struggled for a moment before the boy pulled him back against his own body, murmuring, "Shh shhh," into Anakin's ear. ('The original speaker,' Obi realized.) He could see it all in the lines of his Padawan's face, the war going on within him whether to consent to this treatment or fight him off.
Obi shut his eyes tight, hoping that Anakin would fight them off, that his lover would still be his lover, that Anakin felt as strongly about *them* as Obi-Wan did. He forced his eyes open, and knew that his wish had not come true.
Anakin relaxed into the brown-haired boy's arms, their lips finding each other as the blonde boy, 'Tir' his mind supplied, went to quick work on Anakin's tunics. Another boy, appearing to be younger than all of them had fastened his lips onto Anakin's throat.
Some part of his mind dimly realized that the boy held Anakin's arms back to give the illusion that they were doing this against Anakin's will. He knew better, and so did Anakin. He didn't stay in that room that had grown so uncomfortably small any longer. Without turning off the sound, he walked out, the door falling silently shut behind him.
He did not go into the other room and force the boys off his Anakin, 'No longer yours' some vengeful voice in his mind sneered, but drew the cowl of his robes up to cover his face and went towards the Temple Gardens.
Obi-Wan moved silently, his thoughts jumbled over that scene. 'He was too young,' commented a voice that sounded suspiciously like Qui-Gon. 'Needs friends his own age, your padawan does,' Yoda's voice. That awful sneering voice broke through his thoughts again, 'No, you thought that he would like someone like you. His Master. Older and scarred through years of training. Well he doesn't, he wants fresh unscarred bodies for his pleasure.'
'Can you trust him now that you know he's cheating on you?' Mace's voice. All the voices began to tumble and Obi inhaled deeply. They were quieter now as he stepped into the Gardens and made his way towards one of the darker corners, where he could be left alone.
He began to unfreeze the icy chunks in his own veins first, he knew that this could happen. Obi-Wan *knew* nothing was forever, not even his relationship with Anakin. Qui-Gon's death had taught him that much.
As he settled onto his knees, hands resting on his thighs, he released his feelings into the Force and meditated on what to do next.
When Obi came back to their shared quarters, Anakin was still not home. He did not stop to make his usual evening tea, did not check the messages on his comm, did not call Mace or Yoda or Bant. He went straight to his own bed dropping articles of clothing over the floor, uncaring as to where they landed before he crawled between the cool sheets.
The voices in his head were thankfully silent now even when he caught Anakin's scent still drifting off his pillows, and the scent of their mingled bodies and sex drifting off his sheets.
Obi-Wan tossed and turned, trying to forget the scene of Anakin in the midst of all those boys. That sneering part of his mind had happily supplied images of what happened after he quit watching and it was all Obi-Wan could do to keep those images from coming to the surface of his thoughts.
He finally curled onto his side, facing the door and silenced his mind. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jedi Master, finally fell into a restless sleep.
_He was before the council (yet again).
"The Soul Healers will need to examine you both before we can let you continue this relationship, Master Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan glanced to his left, looking at Master Adi Gallia, but his glance was obscured by his apprentice.
"As the Code dictates." He looked to Mace and nodded._
The colors in his dream blurred, darkened, changed.
_The tip of a wet pink tongue slipped out between Anakin's lips. The barest trace of moisture gleamed in the setting sun's light. Obi-Wan leaned forward, barely pressing his lips to Anakin's. They were soft beneath his, pliable; it was like coming home.
Obi-Wan took the lower lip between his, lightly sucking while his tongue flicked out, tasting the barest moisture that covered Anakin's lip. Anakin tasted like... like... 'ripe cherries in cream' his mind supplied. Obi could get addicted to that taste, wanted more, *needed* more.
His tongue slid to the crease between his Padawan's lips, gently insistent as he silently requested permission to enter. Those lips parted for him, a questing tongue meeting his own. And again, that taste, warm and wet, and Obi was hooked._
His eyes flickered open and he quickly shut them again, burrowing under the sheets and curling tight around the warm body that was in his arms.
Obi pressed his face between Anakin's shoulder blades, nuzzling the soft skin that smelled like fresh honeysuckle. He traced the edge of his nose along the sharp protrusion of bone before the memories came back in a wave and he froze.
This would be the last time he would have Anakin in his arms. The last time he would wake to have Anakin's warm body pressed against him, and the last time they would share this bed. He would not, could not, keep Anakin here after what he saw yesterday. Anakin needed someone closer to his own age, someone who was younger and more beautiful than Obi-Wan.
'Not more beautiful,' Obi thought as he began unwinding himself from Anakin. It had been years since he felt so.. imperfect. It was not a habit he needed to pick up again.
He grabbed his leggings and tunic off the back of the chair ('Anakin must have put them there') and made his way to the 'fresher. Normally he would have just stayed in bed until Anakin woke up but he found he could not this morning. He glanced at himself in the mirror and his eyes fell to the character that had been lightly scratched into his chest.
"I've been branded by a rose." he said to his reflection and climbed into the shower.
Anakin was in the small kitchenette when he emerged from the fresher, clean but the water had not washed away the memories as he had hoped.
He sat down at the table while Anakin placed the plate of toast, cheeses, and fruit before him. He barely picked at his food. Anakin seemed to have suffered no loss of appetite and told Obi about his previous day. He omitted what had happened in the padawan rooms'.
"Master are you feeling alright? You've barely touched your food."
"Yes Anakin, I'm fine. Just have other things on my mind." Obi-Wan replied automatically.
Anakin's brows arched, and then came together. "Are you sure Master?"
Obi-Wan nodded and gave him a quick smile that was returned fully. Anakin began to clear off the table and do the dishes, while Obi-Wan checked the messages on his comm. It seemed like an almost normal day.
Obi-Wan sat on the couch, stretching his legs across the cushions. He mentally steeled himself for what he knew would come next, and before he knew it, he had an armful of Padawan that was stretched between his legs.
"So Master, what are we doing today?" Anakin's head nuzzled into the opening of his tunics.
He recounted what they were to do today. Training, classes for Anakin, midday meal, sparring, meditation, more class... The same thing they did every day. But today wouldn't be like the days before. They would not have their meals together, would not meditate together, would not come home in the evening to make love.
Anakin mumbled something in response and Obi-Wan laughed. The laughter sounded false to his ears, forced. He quickly pressed a kiss to the top of his Padawan's head. It would be the last time. His lips lingered, the short spiky hairs tickling his nose, while the smell of Anakin's shampoo wafted up. It would have to ease the pain in his soul.
"We need to talk, Anakin, Padawan." Was his voice that steady, he didn't feel that steady.
Anakin lifted up slowly from his chest. He couldn't look at Anakin now, lest it break his resolve, but he knew he should.
"I saw you last night Anakin. I saw you with them." The blood drained from Anakin's face.
"Master it's not what you think, I didn't mean for it to happen, it was an accident--"
Obi-Wan knew words like these had been spoken countless times before, always falling from the cheater's lips. He waved his hand, stopping Anakin's flow of words, such words meant little to him. "Padawan... as much as I love you I know you need friends your own age. A... A partner your own age. I am sorry I have held you back. I will still train you, but we cannot continue our relationship."
Anakin's mouth fell open. Tears welled up in those eyes; eyes he had seen bright with love, or darkened in the height of passion. He had to get out of here. "I will see you at evening meal."
Obi rose from the couch and walked into his quarters. The door he wasn't paying attention to shut quietly behind him.
He walked up to the large window in his rooms and rested his hands against the sill. He had done it. And "it" had hurt.
Obi-Wan glanced up and gazed out the window to the world surrounding the temple. It was all metal and glass, hard and sharp, and no longer were the edges of his life softened by the love of Anakin.
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