Title: The Last Time
Author: Ani's apologist
Summary: On Tatooine, Obi Wan sees Anakin a final time
Obi Wan always knew that the empire would find him one day. But Tatooine was as good a place as any to make a home. He was tired of running. Still blind with pain and destroyed by bitterness and regret, he lived as a hermit by the Dune Sea, counting the days until Darth Vader found him and killed him and freed him from the prison of his daily life.
But the day Darth Vader appeared on his door step, it was not to kill him, and Obi Wan found a new reason to want to live: Hope.
"Tatooine..I never would have guessed." Vader/Anakin smiled at the irony as he stepped inside the small hovel. He was alone and did not appear to be armed, which Obi Wan found unusual.
"That's why I chose it.."Obi Wan said flatly. He turned his back on his former apprentice and walked away from the door way towards the small kitchen, "Tell me, Vader..are you here to kill me?"
Anakin seemed genuinely shocked by the question. As Obi Wan turned around to face him again, his eyes were wide with surprise, "No! Of course not why would you think that?"
Obi Wan laughed humourlessly, "Oh, I don't know-maybe because that's what you do for a living now-kill people. Innocent people. Children.."
"Stop!" Anakin's anger flared before he brought it back under control, "If I were here to kill you, I would have done it already."
Obi Wan smiled sadly and sat down heavily in a chair at his table, "Actually, it would be a..relief if you did.." He sighed.
"I am not here to give you relief, master."
"Don't call me that!" Now it was Obi Wan's turn for anger, "We all know you have a new master now."
Vader smiled knowingly, and stepped closer. Obi Wan felt ill. He could swear that he could smell the stench of death on his old student. Vader's aura glowed a blood red-the blood of all the innocents he had killed in the name of his damned empire.
"You make me sick." Obi Wan confessed, backing away.
He turned to face away from the Sith Lord, expecting to hear the hum of Vader's light saber, but instead he heard footsteps, as Vader closed the distance between them, and stood directly behind his old master-so close, that Obi wan could feel the heated breath on the back of his neck.
"Obi Wan.it's been so long."
Was that desire Obi Wan could hear in Vader's voice?
The sith lord slid his arms around Obi Wan's waist and pulled him roughly against his torso, and then, in contrast to the roughness of the embrace, he bent and tenderly kissed the back of Obi Wan's neck.
It felt good. His lips were as soft as Obi Wan remembered. The Jedi master closed his eyes and just let Vader do it for a moment. He relaxed against Vader's body, and swallowed hard. Then he realised what he was doing and his body went rock rigid again, and he tried to pull away, disgusted by the touch of the sith. Vader held him, and refused to let go.
"What do you want from me, Anakin?" Obi Wan asked sadly, "Are you going to rape me now?"
Anakin stiffened at the question, and stopped kissing him, pulling away slightly," I did not come here to kill you, Obi Wan.. I want you."
Obi Wan laughed humourlessly at the absurdity of the statement, "You want me to have sex with you? You truly are insane."
Again, he attempted to pull away, and again, Vader held him hard against his own torso.
You still.care for me, don't you?" Vader whispered gently against his ear.
"No, I stopped loving you long ago, Anakin."
Even as he said the words, Obi Wan could feel himself responding to Vader's touch-and he hated himself for it. He would have sworn to the Force that he was over Anakin-but now he knew that he wasn't, and never would be.
"Your body betrays you, Master." Anakin replied hoarsely, moving his hand down to cup Obi Wan's erection, "It must get lonely out here in the desert, all alone.. when was the last time you made love to someone, master?"
Obi Wan closed his eyes against the words, trying to hold back tears, but failing. They slipped down his cheeks, and he was grateful to have his back to his old lover, so Anakin wouldn't see his pain. He had not made love to anyone since he'd last made love to Anakin nearly two years ago.
It had been the night before he had left for his solo mission to find and kill Grievous-just before their lives fell apart.
They had made love, slow and gentle, all night, and Obi Wan hazily recalled that he had chanted, "I love you, Anakin." over and over again softly, as he moved inside the younger man, until he came.
It was only later, after everything, that Obi Wan allowed himself to reflect on his sexual relationship with Anakin. He had grown bitter when he realised that Anakin had married Padme before they had begun to have sex. He realised, when he put all the pieces together later, that Anakin and he had first made love about two months after Anakin's secret marriage. So-the entire relationship had been a lie. Anakin had been lying to him the entire time! And he had been lying to Padme.in addition to his horrible crimes against humanity and the universe, Obi Wan added those lies-and that made him hate Anakin Skywalker more than ever.
"There has been no one since you, Anakin.." he admitted softly, and the realisation made him feel lonely and ashamed, and he shuddered involuntarily.
Anakin began to kiss his neck again, and slowly he began to stroke his old master's erection, slipping his hand into his pants deftly.
Obi Wan heard a small moan escape his lips, "Please." he whispered, "Don't do this.please stop.."
Vader turned Obi Wan around to face him, and kissed him on the lips, licking at his old master's lips, "Are you sure you want me to stop?" he asked seductively, his lips still ghosting against Obi Wan's as he spoke.
"I can't do this." Obi Wan whimpered.
"Yes you can..you need it, and so do I.."
"Isn't it enough that you seduced me when you already had a wife! That you became .I don't even know how to describe what you've become-a monster? A killer? Isn't it enough that you've ruined my life-destroyed me? Do you have to fuck me again too?"
"I'm not going to fuck you, Obi Wan-I'm going to make love to you."
Obi Wan groaned in defeat, unable to fight Vader.
"Do you miss me, master?"
The question nearly tore Obi Wan's heart from his chest. He could hold back no longer. He let out a desperate cry-somewhere between a moan of sexual desire, and a scream of agony-and fell forward against his old student's chest, inconsolable.
"Yes! Yes, I miss you.so much.you have no idea how much! There are nights when I lay in bed and feel as if I am going mad..I loved you! I loved you more than anything! How could you do this? How could you do this to me?"
The intensity of Obi Wan's despair actually frightened Anakin. He had never seen his old master like this. He wondered, briefly, if Obi Wan had ever considered ending it all, and killing himself.
Obi Wan read his thoughts instantly, "Yes, Anakin.many times.but.I don't have the strength..I guess I am too weak to even do that right."
Obi Wan laughed bitterly, "I failed you. I failed the Jedi-and now, I have even failed myself."
They kissed again, deeper now, more intense, until Obi Wan tore himself away, gasping for breath.
"How could you do this-betray the order? Betray the Jedi-betray ME? Did I mean anything to you? All those nights when we made love-all those things we said to each other-was it ALL a lie?"
Anakin listened for a moment, then slowly started to stroke Obi Wan's back, "You meant everything to me, and it wasn't a lie.everything I ever said to you when we were making love.I meant it all."
"THEN WHY?" Obi Wan thundered.
Anakin had no answer for that, and they both knew it. Anakin merely shook his head sadly, as if he were wishing it all away. They were both crying now.
"I loved you..how could you? I loved you.." Obi Wan continued to whimper it like a mantra, even as he reached out and began to gently stroke Anakin's tear stained face, "I have lived a hell for two years.. I drink, I get high-I ldon't allow myself to have friends or lovers. I hate myself-and I hate you! You've ruined my life."
His hands drifted over the familiar features, and then slid down to the chest, opening the black robe and exposing the sculpted chest The tenderness of Obi Wan's touch was in sharp contrast to his words.
The truth was, as angry as he was-at times, he felt he WAS his anger-he was also painfully attracted to Anakin. He wanted him.needed to make love with him. He began to breath quickly as his arousal grew, and he brought his lips to Anakin's chest, kissing it softly, hearing the Sith Lord moan in pleasure. When his fingers brushed against Anakin's belly, he shuddered reflexively, muscles tightening there, and his breathing hitched.
"What do you want, Obi Wan?" he asked quietly, a sudden lust creeping into his voice.
Miserable, Obi Wan pitched forward, falling against his old student and sliding his face against Anakin's chest, mouthing mindlessly at a hardening nipple, "You.I want you. I have always wanted you.only you."
His hands rested on the growing hardness between Anakin's legs. Anakin gasped softly; surprised that Obi Wan's despair could turn so quickly to desire.
"You understand that this will change nothing?" Vader said coldly.
"I know, " Obi Wan replied sadly, "I don't care anymore.just.one last time.just fuck me.."
He wanted this, needed this.and force forgive him, he would have it. He would fuck and be fucked and lose himself in the physical release-if only this one time, this last time.
"Then touch me." Anakin begged, and Obi Wan did as he asked, slipping his hand inside Anakin's leggings and grasping his erection, and stroking softly, gently-just enough to drive him wild, and not enough to make him come.
Their mouths came together now in a rough kiss, teeth and tongues slamming together in desperation, and Anakin was stripping his old master, wanting and needing to see him naked, needing to feel his skin against his own.
Vader too, needed this, wanted Obi Wan more then he had ever wanted him at that moment. He felt like was burning with lust, and needed to drench himself in Obi Wan to ease the ache.
"Take me to bed." he begged Obi Wan.
Obi Wan stripped him hungrily, kissing and stroking each new bit of exposed flesh and moaning against the heat of Anakin's body. Anakin merely stood there, pliant and willing, letting Obi Wan take him as he wished.
When they were both naked, Obi Wan lay down on the bed, and Anakin covered his old lover's body with his own. Obi Wan yelped with pleasure as their erections brushed against one another, and their lips met in a bruising, desperate kiss. Obi Wan slid his arms down Anakin's back, and gripped at his muscles, and they writhed together, their bodies arching towards each other in lust and passion.
Then he lay back, and wrapped his legs around the Sith's waist in a wordless invitation. Anakin smiled, and slid inside without any hesitation.
The pain was awful, and Obi Wan felt as if he would split in two. He screamed in agony, and bite Vader's shoulder savagely, drawing blood and not caring.
"Submit to me." Vader growled, and Obi Wan did, relaxing against his body and letting the Sith Lord slide deeper still, despite the pain it caused him.
The white heat of Obi Wan's body nearly made him come instantly. He gritted his teeth and regained control of his body and emotions. He closed his eyes, knowing that if he opened them and looked at Obi Wan, he would come from the beauty of the grey eyes and the pain that was in them. Being inside him again after all this time was like a dream, and Anakin wanted to remain there forever, inside him, and being held close. It had been so long since anyone had held him; since anyone had shown him any affection, and he craved it so much it hurt.
Obi Wan had always known what he needed, always seemed to understand that the affection, the emotion behind the act was always much more important to Anakin then the sex itself.
Obi Wan arched against him, pulling Anakin closer and deeper.
"Oh.." Anakin moaned against his ear as he slid to the hilt.
"Please, Anakin..move in me, take me.." Obi Wan sobbed softly, "Fuck me."
"Oh, Obi Wan."
There were no words then, only breathless pants and moans of pleasure. Feeling Anakin inside of him was like a drug to Obi Wan-it always had been. He was addicted to it. He lost himself in the pleasure every single time. It was the same now-he writhed and arched like a whore, gripping Anakin desperately, drinking in the feel of him, the smell of him, trying to make it last forever.
For someone who was so subdued and controlled in his daily life, Obi Wan was the complete opposite in bed. Anakin had always loved how out of control his old teacher was during sex-how he gave in to his base needs, and gave up the Jedi serenity. He loved being taken, being fucked.but then, with Anakin it had never been fucking; it had always been about making love.and now was no different. Despite everything, they were still making love. Despite the initial pain, Anakin was moving slowly, almost tenderly inside his old master. It was beautiful and Obi Wan could not understand how he could have lived without it for two long years. He closed his eyes against the tears, and moaned, losing control.
Obi Wan looked up at his lover. Reaching out, he lightly stroked Anakin's face and neck with his fingertips, brushing over eyelids heavy-lidded, swollen lips, smooth, and sweat slicked neck.. Anakin sighed, and leaned into the touch, his mouth gaping open in a daze of pleasure.
"Oh force.so tight.so hot." he groaned against Obi Wan's neck, moving harder and faster.
With a painful cry, his head thrown back, Anakin came, trying to deny the feelings that were welling up inside of him, and Obi wan felt him flood his insides with warm, wet liquid.
Anakin was so beautiful when he was coming, so beautiful when he was lost in pleasure and lust. Obi Wan rested his hand now on his lover's flushed cheek, and Anakin opened his eyes and looked down at him, his gaze hazy with desire and satisfaction.
Slipping out of his master's body, he slid down the length of his body and took Obi Wan's length into his mouth. Obi Wan groaned-had anything ever felt so good? He arched up off the bed, and buried his hands in the long wavy locks of hair, not guiding Anakin's mouth, simply holding his head there gently. He came with a sigh of relief and whimpered quietly, then relaxed back on the bed while Anakin drank him, and licked him clean.
When he'd finished, Anakin rested his cheek against Obi Wan's thigh, and Obi Wan stroked his hair mindlessly, staring at the ceiling. Neither man seemed to know what to say. After a few moments, Anakin slid back up and looked down at Obi Wan with a mixture of regret and love, and his old master folded Anakin into his arms without a word.
They lay next to each other trembling, holding, caressing, staring into each other's eyes. Obi Wan stroked his lover's chest softly, and Anakin licked and sucked at the hollow of Obi wan's neck.
Obi Wan let Anakin kiss him and caress his chest lightly. He stared at Anakin, unable to believe that he had just allowed this.monster to make love with him. And yet.and yet-he still loved Anakin. Loved the boy and the man he had been before.no! He could not think about that now.that was the past. He closed his mind to Anakin and to himself, and lost himself in the kisses.
The two lovers began to tire, and Anakin drifted slowly to sleep, still entwined in his old master's arms. Obi Wan, however, could not sleep. He stared at the ceiling for a long time, trying to fathom what he had just done-what they had just shared together. It scared him, and yet, it gave me a kind of peace he had not felt in two long years.
Anakin stirred slightly, pressing himself gently against Obi Wan's back. Obi Wan sent a sleep suggestion through the force, and Anakin was easily lulled back to sleep. Obi Wan turned to look at him. Asleep, he looked so serene and at peace. He did not look evil..did not look like the sith he had become.
Obi Wan extracted himself from the bed slowly, while Anakin moaned in his sleep and turned over and away from his old master, lost in a dream of some sort. Obi Wan went to the 'fresher, threw cold water in his face, and then sighed heavily, hanging his head over the sink, and then looking at himself in the mirror. What have I done? He thought. I have betrayed everything I ever believed in for lust-for one night of sex, I have betrayed the Jedi religion. He rubbed at his temples, feeling a migraine coming on. Sleep would not come to him anytime soon. He decided to go outside and mediate, and let Anakin sleep while he decided what they were going to do next.
Obi Wan spent the long night remembering..he recalled the night that he and Anakin first became.involved. Remembered a seventeen year old, far too beautiful for his own good, masturbating on the couch in their shared quarters, thinking that his master would not be back from his council meeting for another hour. He remembered the look of shock and then shame as Obi Wan walked in and discovered him touching himself. Obi Wan had tried to not look shocked as he told Anakin that it was alright, it was normal to self-pleasure, and that, perhaps, in future, he should do it only in the privacy of his own bedroom. Anakin had mumbled something, and fled from the room, avoiding his master's eyes for days afterward.
Obi Wan recalled how he had felt when he had seen Anakin's erect cock in his hand that afternoon-he had felt a spike of pleasure.of desire. He tried to deny it for days, but the sight had aroused him. And so, about two weeks later, when Obi Wan heard familiar soft moans of pleasure coming from Anakin's bedroom one night, he had entered the bedroom, and stood at the doorway for a few moments, just watching. Watching as his apprentice made love to himself.it was a truly erotic sight, and he felt himself growing hard as he stared. He knew he should just walk away but he could not. He wanted, needed.it had been so long.
Obi Wan walked over to the bed, and Anakin's eyes opened wide in surprise. Then Ani's eyes grew even larger as he realised what his master was about to do..
Obi Wan lowered himself slowly towards Anakin's cock. He went slow so that Anakin could protest if this was not what he wanted, but the protest did not come, and Obi Wan closed his mouth over his padawan's erection and began to softly suck and lick Anakin in silence.
At first there had been only the sound of Anakin's heavy breathing, and then the boy had begun to moan with pleasure.oh, force-those moans! So loud, and so hot.Obi Wan was sure that the whole temple could hear Anakin, as his student thrust rhythmically into his mouth, and then came, spilling hot inside his master's waiting mouth, and his master swallowed his pleasure, gulps of it, until the boy collapsed, exhausted and sated against his bed, and Obi Wan had placed his head to his student's head and given him a strong force suggestion for sleep, and Anakin had fallen into a deep sleep.
Once he was sure his Ani was sound asleep, Obi Wan hastily removed his own clothes and lay naked with the boy, rubbing himself all over Anakin's gorgeous form, and then he had jerked himself off, staring at Anakin's nude body. He came with a growl, and spilled himself all over Anakin's body, bathing his student in his come.
Disgusted with himself, he fell against Anakin, regained his breath, and then took a cloth from the fresher and wiped his student's body clean until there was no evidence of what he had just done.
With a sigh, he left the room, and tried to forget.
In the morning, there was an awkward silence, but neither man mentioned what had gone on the night before, and Obi Wan was grateful for that.
But the same thing happened again the next evening-and the one after that. In fact every night for nearly a month-until one night, Anakin took his master in his own hand, and-stroking gently, he looked up at his master and asked him not to give him a force suggested sleep.
"I want to be awake when you come, master-I want to watch you.I want to touch you."
Obi Wan nodded and joined his own hand with Anakin's and they masturbated him in silence together until Obi Wan came on Anakin's belly, and then collapsed against his student and told him for the first time that he loved him.
"That was beautiful." Anakin had whispered, "You're beautiful, master."
A few nights after that, they made love for the first time.
Anakin had been willing, but nervous, "I've never been with a man before." he admitted quietly.
Obi Wan merely smiled and kissed him deeply and slowly, "Don't worry, I have."
He taught his apprentice how to make love to a man that night, and Anakin was a quick study in that, as he was in everything else.
When Anakin entered him, he felt complete.safe. And later, when he slid inside the young boy's body, Anakin felt so hot and soft and tight, Obi Wan had thought he would come just from the pure pleasure of the feeling. Anakin was feeling pain though, so Obi Wan pulled out slightly, and smiled down at his lover, "Tell me you love me." Anakin had breathed, "please.just tell me again."
"I love you, Ani.I love you so much."
Anakin relaxed and Obi Wan made slow, gentle love to him and came inside his student's body, trembling with pleasure and love.
Yes, Anakin had always needed that-to be told over and over again that Obi Wan loved him. Every time they made love. Obi Wan had never realised before just how insecure his apprentice was. It made him sad, and he tried to show him how much he loved him, but it was never enough.never enough touches, never enough kisses, never enough caresses.. Anakin was like a bottomless pit that no amount of love could fill. And it only grew worse and worse until the insecurity led to anger and suspicion and..the dark side.
It had all gone so very wrong, and Obi Wan felt so guilty. Defeated, he stood and decided to go for another of his long solitary walks in the desert. He often went for these walks when he was thinking about Anakin and all that had happened. The desert was so quiet, and it helped him clear his mind.
Inside the small house, Anakin awoke, naked, in his old lover's bed. He reached for Obi Wan, and was surprised to not find him there. For a moment, he forgot that all that other.stuff..had even happened. Maybe it had all been a dream, and he wasn't Darth Vader after all. But then he remembered.it all came crashing back into his mind with the force of a tsunami.
His breathing hitched with the horror of what he had done.what he had become. He lay, frozen, in the bed. He wondered where Obi Wan was, but did not want to venture out of bed to look for him. In fact, he wanted to stay in that bed forever-hiding. Hiding from Palpatine, and the entire universe. He was unable to cope with reality.
Dawn broke as cold as a Hoth sunrise.
Obi Wan returned from his long walk to find Anakin wrapped in one of his old robes and making caf in his kitchen. It was surreal. He smiled warmly when he saw Obi Wan enter. He noted that Obi Wan did not return the smile.
"I made you some caf," Anakin said casually-as if the Jedi purge, the rise of the empire, the death of millions of innocents had not occurred, as if things were the same as they had always been, "Do you still have it with sugar? I can't seem to find any.."
Obi Wan sat heavily at the kitchen table, rubbing his temples slowly, "Black is fine, Ani." he said flatly, avoiding the concerned look on his old apprentice's face, as he handed him the cup of caf.
Anakin knew they needed to talk-about a lot of things. But he wasn't ready too-not yet. He had no idea what he was going to say to Obi Wan's questions.
"Did you sleep at all last night?" he asked, sitting across from Obi Wan at the small table, "I woke up a few times and you weren't in bed."
"Stop, Anakin!" Obi Wan cut him off, suddenly annoyed by Anakin's avoidance tactics, "Stop acting like everything is alright-its not. Last night was ...a mistake."
"No," Anakin whispered painfully, with more emotion then he wanted to show or admit, "Don't say that, master."
"I'm not your master-and it WAS a mistake, Anakin.--one that I won't make again. You need to leave here. The man I once loved is.dead to me. You are Darth Vader, not Anakin Skywalker. I will not lay in bed with a sith!"
"You did last night!" Anakin accused, his voice suddenly angry and full of pain, "And you enjoyed it! I felt your pleasure, master-felt your love.I felt you come inside me and moan.."
"STOP!" Obi Wan covered his face with his hands, as if trying to block out the events of the night before.
Calming himself, he continued, "Don't do this to me. If you ever loved me, if you have ANY feeling for me now-don't make me betray all that I have ever lived for! Not again!"
"Yes-again! When we.slept together before, when we were partners and we would.go to bed together-you know that was against the code! It was forbidden! We never should have done that-I betrayed the code for you!"
Vader smiled sarcastically, "I don't recall having to beg you-you were quite willing, as I recall."
Obi Wan's eyes misted as he remembered their first time together.
"You are right." he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper, "I was willing-I was wrong, but I was willing. I loved you.and then you broke my heart."
His old master was weeping openly now, and his body trembled with the depth of his emotional despair. Anakin rose slowly, and walked over to him, sinking to his knees and resting his hands on Obi wan's knees, looking imploringly into his eyes, "I don't ask you to betray yourself-or what you believe in. I never did. Love is not a betrayal Obi Wan!"
Obi Wan sat silently, crying softly. His mind reeled with confusion and longing.
It was so tempting to do as Anakin suggested-just live in the moment, make love and give each other pleasure, and not worry about the consequences. He had spent his whole life thinking and worrying about consequences, and where had that gotten him? Had it done him any good? Maybe Anakin was right-consequences be damned.
He reached out and stroked Anakin's cheek gently with his thumb, "oh, Ani..so much death.so much destruction.why? I want to understand-I need to understand."
"There is nothing to understand.it is my destiny." Anakin replied.
Obi Wan was looking at him as if he either did not understand or did not believe what Anakin was saying. He continued to sob and stroke his cheek. Anakin did not know what else to say.
Slowly-so slowly that at first, Obi wan did not even realise it was happening-Anakin lowered his head to his old master's lap, and brought his hands to Obi wan's waist, undoing the tie of his heavy robe. He knew Obi wan was naked beneath the robe, and wanted to suck him-to kiss and lick and suck his master's organ until Obi Wan cried out with pleasure, and then he wanted to drink his master's come.
"Anakin, no.please-don't." he begged between sobs, but Anakin was beyond listening now.
Taking the flaccid member into his mouth, he never broke his gaze with Obi Wan. It wasn't until his cock was in his old apprentice's mouth that Obi Wan realised they were about to make love again. Whatever protest he had attempted was gone. He moaned with sadness and resignation as he felt his cock respond to Anakin's warm mouth. He stared into Anakin's eyes as the Sith made love to him with his mouth.
"Ani." he moaned as the pleasure mounted.
Anakin felt the sex grow hard in his mouth, and began to quicken his pace, as he felt his old master's hands fisting in his hair.
"Why can't I ever say no to you?" Obi Wan whimpered.
With that, Obi Wan came with a strangled cry of release and resignation, submitting to Anakin's sexual power over him. Anakin drank him, swallowing all of his seed, and letting the softening organ slip from his mouth, he rose up and captured Obi wan's lips with his own, allowing his master to taste himself in his mouth. The kiss was gentle and slow, and they moaned quietly as they kissed, then pressed their foreheads together, closing their eyes, and sealing their pact.
"I love you." Obi Wan whimpered.
He noted, dully, that Anakin did not return the sentiment. It did not surprise him.
They returned to Obi Wan's bed, and Obi Wan fucked him with all the frustration, anger and pain he had felt for two years. The pain was incredible, but Anakin welcomed it, needed the pain.it was similar to the way Palpatine fucked him, and yet different because he knew that, despite it all, Obi Wan loved him. He grabbed and twisted the sheets as Obi Wan pounded into him angrily, and just let his old master claim him. It was what they both needed.
When Obi Wan came, he screamed like an animal in heat, releasing his semen and his anger into the body of his old lover, clawing at his back and biting him hard on the shoulder again. Blood dripped into the sheets and Obi Wan collapsed against Vader's back, exhausted and sated.
Later, the lovemaking was slow and tender. So gentle, that Obi Wan almost forgot what Anakin was now-was it truly possible for a Sith to make love so tenderly?
Obi Wan took him from behind while kissing and licking his back, and telling him he loved him, and then let his old student take him face to face. It was hard, looking into those blue eyes-so full of fear and pain.Anakin would stop moving inside him, lower himself to his old master's mouth and they would kiss and grind desperately against each other for a while. Then Anakin would begin to move in him again, and it went on for nearly an hour until they were both crazed with lust and needed release too badly to slow down any longer, and they came together, clinging to each other's sweaty bodies and screaming each other's names.
Anakin collapsed against him, and they trembled in each other's arms, each staring into the eyes of the other, shocked by the intensity of the sex, and the love. Tears stained their faces. Obi Wan ghosted Anakin's swollen, full lips with the tips of his fingers.
"Obi Wan." Anakin whispered, trembling against his touch, "Please."
"Please.don't.let this end."
The words-and the emotion behind them-nearly tore Obi Wan's heart out of his chest. He wanted to hold Anakin like this forever, but he knew that was impossible.
With a soft whimper of sad, sullen defeat, he leaned his forehead against Anakin's, and sobbed, "I'm sorry I failed you, Anakin.I am sorry."
They gentled each other with soothing words, and caresses, and then they slept, exhausted from their lovemaking, and emotionally drained by their feelings.
When Obi Wan awoke, he was alone. A note was left on the pillow Anakin-now Vader-had slept upon. It read:
Last night will live in my heart until I die, but you must know I cannot stay. I wish I could.. please know that I loved you, and wish it were otherwise.
Obi Wan wept, then folded the paper up and placed it in a safe place. One day, when he could tell Luke everything, he would give him this note, so he would know what Obi Wan and Anakin had shared, and that there was still good in Darth Vader.
For the first time in a very long time, he had hope.
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