Thoughtful Day
Mood:  don't ask
Topic: How do you feel?
Last night I talked to a very exciting guy. He's been to at least 11 different countries. The dumb thing is I think meeting people online is making me a little "color" insecure. I've had some bad experiences with people I've chatted with who found out I was black. Like they got all weird on me. I told him ---the guy from last night--that I wasn't his type b/c I was black more or less. He wasn't completly amused, but he was seriously nice about the whole thing.
The odd thing is in person I know I'm incredibly attractive, but my pictures don't always look that great. I never know what some people think when they see them online.
I've had a couple your cute and a your beautiful too--
But like guys I probably would like to hear tha from I barely hear that from. The last guy who was like that turned out to be a complete player. I'd like to meet a guy who can be trusted ya know?
Very few of them around.

Oh well.

I' Aint Saying She's A Gold Digger...
Topic: Hmm
This is purely nonesense, but that new Kanye West song is freakin catchy. At least the Jamie Foxx part. The song itself I don't get, but Jamie Foxx has that thing down. I'm glad the edited version is the only thing my brother hears on the radio. They destroy the best songs with cussing. And the video---stupid---has nothing to do with the song. I could have wrote a video for this song.
I would have had a classy looking chick, and a semi professional looking guy, some nappy kids---her shopping, the restaurant ---them washing the dishes---waking up---then the end where he leaves her for a white girl--down a real mapped out mansion---
It would have been a great video ;)

Good Morning
Topic: Are You Smiling Yet?
So far my day has started out wonderfully!
In all honesty I could barely sleep last night.
I tossed and turned like you wouldn't believe.
That blasted bright light! I tossed until I couldn't stand it anymore and went downstairs at 6:00 am. I have some in house marketing to do today so I may be online periodiclly.

I'm looking forward to this weekend though. We have a few meetings to attend and church. Hopefully I'll catch up on some calls too, I'm feeling pretty good!

I talked to one of my favorite new people like Monday night.
We seem to play phone tag like everytime we end up talking hanging up several times durring the conversation, I sent him that quiz too I listed yesturday. Shoot I have a few more people I need to send it to too, but he was fresh in my mind so I guess that's why I sent it to him first.

This is what I sent him, I'll probably add some of the other's here in a few days too,

1)I hate the way you have to go sometimes when we're
on the phone.
2) I hate the fact that we may never meet here on
earth, when talking to you is heaven.
3) I hate that I can't think of 10 things about you to
hate, but I can think of 3 that I like--the way you
listen, talk and communicate.
4) I hate the way I feel like I've known you forever.
5) I hate it when you don't say God Bless you, it's
something I think you say so cool.
6) I hate it when I think about how godly you are--I
wish I knew more people like you.
7) I hate the fact that I don't know what you're
thinking, but you seem to speak right into my soul.
8) I hate the only time I heard you sing was that
first time on the phone.
9) I hate the fact that you don't tape your sermons
because it would be such a blessing to my spirit.
10) But most of all I hate that you made me smile when
I wanted to cry with one voicemail alone.
I guess the 10 things I hate about you are those
things I really like about you.

They Were Hazel
I remember my first real crush.
He looked liked Kurt Cameron. He had these incredible hazel eyes when I stood up from orientation. I had never seen eyes so magnetic.
He smiled and said hello to me. I'm telling you it was wonderful. I was 14. I liked that same guy for 4 years.

Oddly enough I think the way he treated me while I attended school their totally molded my idea husband. He was what you call incredibly sweet. He would buy me lunch, get stuff for me, talk to me and so forth. Then he had ideas about his future, about working, having a family, and an amazing desire to attend this Christian college.

I guess I came to expect that I would marry a good looking hard working guy who is generous, loving, fun and loves Christ.

I remember this one day I was walking back to class and he was in the chapel playing the below song on the piano. I felt something when he played that song, something so close to heaven.

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longs after Thee.

You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee.

You alone are my strength, my shield,
To You alone may my spirit yield.

You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee.

As the deer panteth after the water brooks,
so panteth my soul after thee, O God.

Relationships Can Make You Fat?
They have this article up on MSN about how being in a relationship kind of fizzles out trying to stay thin. That women generally get so comfortable with their weight that they blow up.

Now personally, I only eat when I'm depressed, not comfortable.
And when I like a guy I generally lose weight really quick because you have to look good. In some cases I've literally lost my appetite because I was full with how I felt about that guy.

Once again I think science is making excuses on why people turn to food. I have never met a sincerely happy over weight female. Since I was over weight my teenage years, I guarantee I didn't eat because I was comfortable, but because food was comforting.

Food doesn't talk back, it's there when you want it and there when you don't. It will hardly ever disappoint you, that's why women gain weight. That's why some guys gain weight---they can rely on food instead of their girlfriend.

As a girl I know when a guy I liked has let me down I do eat, but I try not to over do it because I know being fat isn't pretty on me.

I think just being liked as a friend or even feeling attractive makes one want to look good. Even as silly as my guy friend's are they like me from the inside out even if they aren't attracted to me. That keeps off my weight too.

Right now I'm feeling pretty good--

10 Things I Hate About You
Mood:  hug me
Topic: How Do You Feel About Me?
So today I forwarded this quiz called 10 Things I Hate/Like??? About You based on that movie 10 Things I Hate About You.

I guess I sent it out because the cool thing about quizes is you can be honest like through the whole thing b/c no one takes them that seriously. I did mean what I said in my forwards. There are always those things you never think about until your asked, then you 're are like wow, I didn't know I felt like that.

So in honor of the movie that I thought was pointless till I saw it below is the 10 Things Kat--the main character hated about the guy she liked...


KAT
I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car.
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick.
It even makes me rhyme.

She pauses, then continues.


KAT
(continuing)
I hate it...
I hate the way you're always right.
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh;
Even worse when you make me cry.

She begins to cry as she continues to read.

KAT
(continuing)
I hate it when you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call,
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you;
Not even close;
Not even a little bit;
Not even at all.


It's weird how you feel something one minute and you wish you could change it all the next.