2/6/05
they shouldnt tell girls not to drink....they should tell sluts not to fuck
6/5/03
how do you circumcise a hillbilly?...Kick his sister in the jaw.
6/17/03
how many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb?.....Hey do you want to go bike riding??
6/17/03
elephant: why do you have two boobs on your back? camel: thats a pretty dumb question coming from someone with a dick on their face
6/5/03
sex is like air, its not a big deal unless your not getting any
6/5/03
i like porn becuase it doesnt laugh at my dick
6/5/03
when i was born ... the doctor came out to the waiting room and said
to my father ... i'm very sorry .... we did everything we could ...
But he pulled through.
4/30/03
i was so poor growing up ... if i wasn't born a boy .... i'd have
nothing to play with.
4/30/03
i could tell that my parents hated me. my bath toys were a toaster and
a radio
4/30/03
i'm so ugly ... my father carries around the picture of the kid who
came with his wallet
4/30/03
the length of a movie should only last the endurance of a bladder
2/21/03
girls are like trains, you never want to stop riding them
he actually made it up
12/10/02
what is good in pie but not in pussy? the crust and filling
12/10/02
live your life with no regrets, leave everything behind you before you die
12/10/02
you only live once, cherish every moment
12/10/02
you only live once, play as much as u can before u get tired down
12/10/02
if you can't be a kid all your life, then why not be immature your whole life
9/27/02
sex is like poker, if you dont have a good partner than your partner better have a good hand
9/6/02
it's better to let people think you're an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it
9/6/02
excuses are like buttholes, everyone has one, and they all fucking stink
8/23/02
girls are like pianos, when they are not upright, they're grand
8/21/02
"suicide hotline...please hold"
7/15/02
If at first you dont succed, then skydiving isnt for you
7/15/02
If your not living life on the edge, your taking up too much space
7/15/02
a bird in your hand is safer than one above
7/15/02
ethernet:n:something used to catch the ether bunny
7/15/02
Baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS
7/15/02
dain bramaged
7/15/02
Red necks think of a family reunion as a chance to meet girls
7/6/02
puerto ricans are better than amer ricans
4/29/02
but occifer, i swear to drunk im not God
4/29/02
life's a bitch then you die
4/25/02
guys dont like two words "don't" and "stop"; unless they are put together
4/25/02
im threw with guys they all tell lies they break ur heart and make you cry. luvin guys is such a sin, ooohhh look at that guy who just walked in