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|o| Sparkey's Poems |o|

"A passion so strong overwhelms me, into a sea of dark obsession. Like a black mist sweeping over my body clutching at the inner depths of my soul; banishing me from myself and enslaving my heart far away in a dank musty dungeon of despair. Knives tear at my flesh, with every slice I fall deeper entranced with my prince of death. From my mouth a shrill cry has escaped my lungs, it is too late to turn back now. Enraptured by the very sound of his voice, longing for his sinful kisses to dwell upon my lips, my soul seems unwieldy. I am weak and decrepit, basking in my disgust. Slowly to my grave I creep, the yearnings of the gulfs of my soul, remain melancholy. My desire to seize my dark prince shall remain forbidden, and exiled to the pit of my heart for all eternity...."- just something I wrote (not really a poem)

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~No Regrets~

You promised me you'd always care

But when I turned, you were not there

You said you'll always hurt like me

One day, together, that we'd be free

You had yours, and I had mine

Jealousy and turmoil began to shine

You gave me a reason to fight

To live and love, it seemed so right

As one we clung to straws of life

To fight the pain, and fight the strife

They told us that it was wrong

Two women together..it didn't belong

I let you in, my soul to bare

But easy moments soon were rare

And with the majority you may agree

But in my heart, you'll always be...

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~Epiphany~

I'm gonna pretend that pain's not there

and laugh

and joke

like i don't care.

They'll never see i really do

Too bad i'm not as strong as you.

I need the pain, I need the strife,

I want the courage to end my life.

I cry, and cry, but tears won't help,

I need the strength to save myself.

They laugh and mock, skin raw to the bone,

They make it so I'm all alone.

I take their hate, my smiles so fake,

Their torment haunts me in my wake.

My guard is down, no shield to fend,

Come and make me whole again.

I'm gonna pretend the pain's gone far

And it won't

ever find us

where we are.

They say we won't stay together long,

That we won't last, and we're not strong.

And just like always, We'll prove 'em wrong.

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~Empathy~

I can feel it coming back

That deep pain I know so well

Just when I thought my tears were gone

My eyes slowly start to swell

My life flashed before my eyes

It pasted in just a glance

It seems from the very start of the end

I never had a chance

I dig the gave inside my heart

I wipe the tears that stain my cheek

I let them show no mercy

As I sit here crumpled, I feel so weak

By a world consumed in hate

I feel the indignation

How can so much freedom

End in detestation?

A clamor arises from my throat

To a world shrouded in silence

Let your liberty bell speak truth for once

To end all hate and violence

A thorn ingrained within my side

Is the indolence in your heart

From the very beginning of the end

I knew that endings never start.

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~Used~

You come and go so easily

Leaving tracks wherever you wander

Your whole existence, your reality,

Iím beginning to ponder.

I need to feel that hateful touch

You so carelessly render,

Never caring who you shame,

Youíre my repeated offender.

Someday I know I'll make you pay

You'll hurt deep down like me

Then you'll plead for mercy

I will be set free.

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~Hidden Force~

I am what you lack inside

I am all you try to hide

In their stature you confide

I am the you inside

You change the color of your hair

And what they say is what you wear

When you turn they won't be there

I am the you inside

They put you down with no remorse

Their unrelenting is the source

The newest trends are what they force

I am the you inside

You cry and beg but still they hold

Your cards were dealt and now you fold

Your soul to them has long been sold

I am the you inside

With their smiles your heart must die

Tears are useless so don't you cry

Your hope is gone so here you lie

I am the you inside

You will never forget the day

When they all gathered at your feet to pray

In your coffin you now lay

I was the you inside

The you inside will never perish

I will laugh, and mock in relish

The pain they caused is mine to cherish

I am the you inside

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~Untitled~

I'm scared to fall

Fall into you

I'm scared of what

I just might do

All the faces

I've been through

But none of them

Compare to you

Revived a soul

A heart so blue

Deep down I know

To me you're true

Yes, I gave up

And they did too

But with you here

I'll start anew..

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~Zeal~

Just one touch from you

Runs chills down my spine

Im falling too fast

I just want you mine

It's hard to let go

Move on from the past

I just have to wonder

Could we ever last?

You envoke feelings

I never knew could be

I would stop time forever

For just you and me

You outran my guard

And sauntered right in

Now I leave the door open

So my life can begin

Your love is what I hold on to

So now I can deal

Here you are with me

And together we'll heal..

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~Dear Ana~

Look at what you've done to me,

At what you've put me through

I sit here crying, just to wonder

What I did to you?

You smear my face with make-up

Of a beast I do not know

"Can't eat this, too much fat"...

How's a girl to grow?

"Look at that page", you say

"True beauty is right there.."

Airbrushing, plastic surgery

I have to ask you...Where?

You say "It's not enough yet,

Bones are the way to be.."

Mercifully, I beg you, just..

TAKE A LOOK AT ME

Like a porcelain doll,

You want me made of glass

"Thinner is the winner"?

Yeah? My fucking ass.

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~Dolly Dearest~

Open up my dollhouse

Rearange my face

Slit my wrists

Blood all over the place

Dead green eyes of fear

Cloth emotions everywhere

Silently shrieking as death comes near

My plastic lips are sealed

You've got me teriffied

Afraid to live in my own skin

Torn up, All ragged..I beg you,

Sew my stuffing back in..

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~I am~

I am...

I am from lies and deceit

Yelling and screaming

Liquor and stale pretzels

I am...

I am...

Sick of lying and pretending

Inside I'm mangled beyond repair

Slowly walls crumble

I am...

I am...

Tattered and ragged

Weathered and jaded

Alone to pick up the pieces

I am...

I am...

I am from pride and silence

Broken dishes and angry silverware

Hoping for a better tomorrow

I am.

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~Listless~

Listless

Broken hearts

Will never heal

Life goes on,

So I'll just deal

Yes, it hurts...

But I'll repent

Too many tears,

On you I've spent.

One day you'll see,

That it was fate;

That will be,

One day too late.

You broke me down,

Ignored my cries;

I turned my back,

And closed my eyes.

You want your cake,

And eat it too;

You'll walk away,

And start brand new.

Here, left standing

In the dust,

My limbs of steel,

Have turned to rust.

Of all the things,

I truly miss

None compare,

To your sweet kiss.

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~Remnants~

You promised me forever..

Together hand in hand

You wanted me to be your girl

To wear that sacred band.

One day I felt it crumble

The dust settled where I stood

You watched me writhe in agony

I didn't know you could.

So here I lie in remnants

Of a love forsaken me

You hold the key to my broken heart

Now come and set me free.

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~Get over it~

A love so strong,

or so I thought

Enough for you?

Well, I guess not...

You see these scars?

They're not in vain..

You left me helpless...

See, tears do stain.

Your smiling face,

Your loving eyes,

Your sweet embrace;

All smeared with lies.

But to my heart

I can't be true

It wont let me

Get over you.

Your callous ways

Your attitude

Your vicious words

They seem so crude

But all days end

And I'm still here

So I'll move on

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~Release~

The more you lie,

That hole gets deep

This pile of dirt

Is yours to keep

Further down

You dig my grave

Until there's left

No soul to save

You planted seeds

I watched them reap

And slit my wrist

You watched it seep

A breath too late

You dare be brave

I wretch with fear

Quick death I crave

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~Stolen Innocence~

Another rhymed story;

Sad tale full of spills.

Small, white, knuckles clenched;

On my fist full of pills.

Just you and I left then;

Awake in that bed.

Long asleep was my savior;

I awaited with dread.

I tried to escape it;

My limbs remained numb.

Years later, your torment;

I'm forced to succumb.

To this day I have nightmares;

Of your strong, immense clasp.

I lay frozen in fear;

By the way your breath would rasp.

A life left in shambles;

Young soul filled with fear.

My savior still taunts me;

Breath laden with beer.

Your hands soiled forever;

With the taint of your own sin.

Penetration or not;

You raped me within.

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~The Final Goodbye~

Then when I'm almost done here,

And I don't know where I'm headed,

Remember this as my last goodbye;

The last words on my page embedded.

Hollow soul and broken heart,

Three words were all it took.

I love to hate the empty soul,

That so foolishly I overlook.

And you, not to be mistaken

For a love gone unrequited,

The countless words of degradation,

My bitter tongue has ignited.

He takes the hand of victory,

As if he was worthy of praise.

His repercussions keep me sick,

Predestined to his malevolent ways.

Just remember, I'm almost done here now;

I know these words you've dreaded.

Regard this as my last and final letter,

As I wonder where I'm headed.

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That's all for now. More to come soon...

©Robyn Victoria Sparkes