>>>Major Gunns a.k.a Tylene Buck<<<

If I said you guys were happy to see my, would I be right?

~The fans break out in cheers, then Major Gunns continues.~

>>>Major gunns a.k.a Tylene Buck<<<

Well, believe me, the feeling is most definitely mutual. I mean, I can't believe that I've finally made it to a big time Federation, the EWA. I'm really, really, ecited to be here, and can't wait until I step in the ring and kick some EWA Diva butt! Just kidding... Anyways, to get to the point as to why I'm out here, well it's simple. I'm gonna be just like everyone else, come out here and make my opinions of the Superstars that I'll be working with, during my stay in the EWA. I'll tell you what I think of Stephanie McMahon, Trish Stratus, Torrie Wilson, Lita, and Stacy Keibler. I'll talk a lot about the Diva's I'm going to be in the ring with on Monday. I'll tell you wht I think of my match, so basically I'm just out here to give you my point of view on everyhing that deals with muah. Now, if you guys have been watching, you know how I got here, and why I'm here. But, let me tell you you what I think of this place, now that I am here. I think that that interview guy is real nice, but that the EWA majorly needs to hire better Security Guards. I'm just kidding again, there are more important things about my arrival then interviews and getting harrassed by Security Guards. Let me just say, I've never seen a Federation whose fans are more devoted! You guys are awesome.

~The fans break out in cheers once again, even as Tylene continues.~

>>>Major gunns a.k.a Tylene Buck<<<

But with all seriousness, you guys do rock. Also, from hearing about the Roster and everything, I'd say the EWA has a talented Roster on their hands. Fromt he looks of this place, this Federation is going to go far, and I'm just happy to be a part of that. And I'm sure you agree with me when I say that there's no other better Federation then the EWA. But, anyways, let's get down to business, cuz after all, I can't be out here for forever, yah know...

I think the first Diva I'll talk about will be the most deserving one. That obviously is Stephanie McMahon, since she's the Womens Champion. See, the definition of Champion is one who is seen as better than others. Stephanie being the Womens champion, is seen as the best of the Divas. That's quite a Title to hold, and a very honorable one at that. So, I'm not going to go by the saying, save the best for last. I think that the best should get the first of my attention. Stephanie, since I've just arrived, I'm not sure exactly how long you've held onto that Title. All I know, after researching, is that back in the WWE you held onto that Championship for about five months straight! That is, indeed, very impressive, compared to the ladies who have only had the Title for two months, or haven't had the Title at all for that matter. So yeah, Stephanie, you should be proud of yourself, and I'm sure you are. But that Title reign in WWE... Well, you shouldn't be to awfully proud of that. Considering the fact you defended it only a few times. See, Steph, if it had been me, being the Champion, then you could bet your bottom dollar that it would be defended every event! That's simply because I would choose to be an honorable Champion. I'd want people to respect me, and I know that they probably will, if I gave them all fair chances at my Title. But I guess that's the difference between you and me, Steph. I'm fair, and well, you have to admit it, you're not. Also, something else... I've noticed that you complain a lot about being disrespected and things like that... But did you ever think that maybe, if you stopped being disrepsectful to everyone else, then they might respect you... And who knows, you might even make a friend! Though that mighr be saying just a bit too much. Anyways, Stephanie, yeah, I do respect you. And since I haven't actually met you yet, I can't say I hate you, though I'm not even about to say that I like you. You're the Womens Champion, you deserve respect. But, figure it this way... You get as much as you put into it. So far, I haven't seen a whole lot of effort put in by you, to make friends, or get respected. Maybe that's what you're like though, huh? Recieving and not giving? Well, Steph, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but it doesn't work that way. You have to earn respect from the other Divas, including myself, or you might as well expect none. You want respect, Steph? Your daddy should have taught you that you don't always get what you want. I know, I know I know... I came out here saying I wouldn't talk trash because I don't know a whole lot about these ladies... But I do know this... Stephanie, at one point of time you tried to run your daddy out of business. Just like the ungrateful brat you are, you turned on him! But then, you power hungry witch, went crawling back to him, begging for forgiveness. At first, you know, I thought Vince was gonna play the smart guy for the first time in his life. But appearantly not, since it didn't take him long to forgive you, and let you come back. And what amazes me yet, is how Linda put up with all this. You've slapped your mother on more than one occccasion, now tell me what part of that deserves respect? Where I come from you love and you respect your parents. Obviously you've done neither, unless you got something out of it. That's selfish, and undeserving! Vince, he might have forgiven you. He might have re-hired you... But if you were my daughter, Stephanie.... I don't care how old you are. I would have had you over my knee, beating your butt! Cuz after all the stunts you've pulled, a good whippin' is exactly what you have coming to you! However, unfortunately, it looks to me like your poor ole' dad doesn't have the grapefruits to give you what you deserve... So I guess that means, that it'll be me who will put you in your place. I dont know after you face Lita and Trish, who the Womens Champion will be. But whether it's you, or it's Trish, or, I hope, Lita, that doesn't matter. Cuz even if you come out victorious, Stephanie, I know you had a good beating in that ring... But not good enough. After all that you've done, no beating is good enough for you. But, Stephanie, if you do come out victorious, that's all the better. Because then, if I beat Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson, it will be me and you in that ring for the Womens Championship. And, now that I'm finally getting a chance, I'm not going to let that belt slip through my fingers. So, Stephanie, hopefully I'll see you in the ring at Summerslam but if not, I know Summerslam won't be the last time I can get my hands on you. So Stephanie, I'll see you around... Unfortunately! Now who here thinks that's enough of the Billion Dollar Brat?

~The crowd erupts with cheers. Major Gunns smirks at the fans, satisfied with their answer. She smiles and raises the mic to her lips, to start off on another Diva of the Federation.~

>>>Major gunns a.k.a Tylene Buck<<<

I thought you'd say that. So how about I begin to pick on a fan favorite for a change? Let's see... How about Trish Stratus? Now this is going to be the one time where I don't copy almost everyone else. I'm not out here to mock Trish or point out the similarities between her name and the word "trash". I think that's immature, if you ask me. Like I said earlier, I'm not going to call Trish a silicone stuffed, barbie doll wanna be, trash bag, ho. I don't think she is at all. and as far as the silicone stuffed goes... Well, I don't have any room to talk in that area, I'll admit. Trish, yeah, she's talented. She's also one of the many former WWE Womens Champions. Unlike Stephanie, and some of the other Divas here, she doesn't walk around saying she's the best, though chances are, she probably is. She's blonde, so am I, so is Stacy, and so is Torrie, yet if anyone cares to notice, none of us are as dumb as some of the other Superstars in this Federation... I mean, I do know a brunette Diva, that's not on the smartest side... If you all know who I'm talking about. But you probably do, considering the fact that there is only one brunette in this Company. But, anyways, back to Trish... You were the Womens champion for a little bit, then you lost it to Jazz... But in a re-match three months down the road, you stole back your Title, held it for about a month, then lost it once again, only this time to the pure and innocent Molly Holly. Now, I'm not knocking that loss, I'm sure Molly Holly, is erm... A tough opponent. But I'm surprised that you beat Jazz, yet couldn't get the job done with Molly. Jazz just seems to out-weigh Molly in everything. But, again, I'm not knocking the loss. Trish, you're a spectacular wrestler. Just like me, you were a fitness model before you even thought about wrestling. You and I were both on covers for magazines, see we have more than just being in the EWA together, in common... You've taken major bumps, such as that table you went through, thanks to the Dudley Boyz, I never really got action like that in WCW, no matter how badly I wanted it. But see, I respect every Diva here, whether I like them or not. Each and every one of you deserve respect, just for even daring to get in the ring, when you know you're going to get hurt. Whether some of you agree with me or not, it does take a lot of courage to come in front of thousands of people, knowing there's millions more at home watching your every move. It's really hard to make sure you deliver what they want to see... But that's where Trish comes in... How would she put it? Oh yeah... She delivers one hundred percent Stratusfaction! But, Trish, you did happen to do a little something, that, well... I have strong feelings against. However, I don't know how to put it lightly, so I'll just spit it out. Trish, you not only slept with a fifty something year old man, but you slept with your boss! Now, does that not appear wrong to you? No? Well, how about this... He was married, which means you helped a man cheat on his wife... You stripped down in the ring for his enjoyment, yet trying to get the sympathy from the fans, that you wanted so bad. Well, yah know, I would say that because of this, I want nothing to do with you... But that would be lying. After all, you did make it up to everyone, by helping Linda McMahon get revenge on Vince. And, that was quite nice of you. But the fact remains that you did some sexual stuff with him. I think maybe that's why they call you trash and a slut. I know you can't erase your past, and I'm not going to keep on carrying on about it, cuz mine isn't the best past either. The point is, Trish, you're a hot Diva. And the ones who don't think so... Well either their blind, stupid, weird, bad of judgement, or just plain jealous! Take Stacy Keibler for instance... She stands in this ring bragging about her legs, and how much better she looks then everyone else. But that there... That's pure one hundred percent jealousy! I mean look at you Trish... Yeah, five foot and four inches, with a body Stacy would die to have... The great hair, and an actual chest are two out of the many things that she lacks. But, I'm not on Stacy yet, so I'll go back to Trish. Despite popular belief, I think Trish has more than proven that she's more then just a pretty face. But if any of you disagree, well that's fine. Everyone has their different opinions. That's good though, if anyone thought the same thing, it would be terribly boring. However, whether you like the girl or not, you can't deny the fact that she is talented. And that she's smart. And well, to sum it up, you can't deny that she's a Blonde Bombshell. And a kick ass one at that! See Trish, I don't envy you, I'm not jealous of you. On the looks well, I think you and I could get the same score. and I want you to know that just because you have been the Womens Champion before, and even though you're probably going to be the Womens Champion, come this Monday, I'm still as good a wrestler as you are. People think I'm a ditz in the ring Trish, like people used to think of you. But, let it be known, I am your equal. I can do as good as you in that ring, any time any where. And if I beat torrie and stacy, and if you beat Stephanie and Lita, then I can prove it to you. Trish I respect you, and even when I was just in the XPW, I wanted to go to the WWE and make it big, and be just like you. To tell the truth, you were sort of my role model while I was in wCW and XPW. But now that I'm working among you, you're not my role model anymore. You're my coleague. A great one at that. But, I won't hesitate to waste you, if it means I can get to the top. Trish, you're great, you're awesome, and you kick ass. But someones gonna learn something new, tonight. And that is, Major Gunns... She's a tough lil' competitor. Now as much as I lobe talking about this Bombshell, there's one more great Diva who most definately needs some words spoken about her. How about Lita?

~The fans errupt, suprroting one of their favorite Divas, the Queen of eXtreme, Lita. Major Gunns continues.~

>>>Major gunns a.k.a Tylene Buck<<<

Lita... Might I just say you most definitely my favorite Diva of all times! I'm not trying to kiss ass or anything, but seriously, you are the greatest! You went from a small time Federation, such as the ECW, and made it big in the WWE! You're an inspiration to everyone, every single one of these fans, who want to become wrestlers. But it's just not only how you got big, it's your wrestling style to. You're the high-flying, Queen of eXtreme! You give off sex appeal, yet everyone knows you're one tough chick, that they shouldn't mess with. At one time you said that it takes a certain breed of people to wrestle, and Lita, I think you're right. And I think you're one of that breed to. You're willing to try any new move, and take any bump that you know will be hard taking. Yet you do it anyways. You're all aboutt he business, ands eeing that the fans here get what they want. I think that's why the fans, and I, and many of the Superstars backstage, like you and respect you so much. But see, some people choose to think that cute, little blondes can't wrestle. That's not true, we can wrestle just as good as the hot red heads that are there. Lita, you're all about the business, and pleasing the fans. But so am I, so is Trish, and Torrie, and heck, even stacy Keibler! And I know you'r enot knocking that. I know you respect all wrestlers here, cuz that's just like you. But if you think that I'm some big chested bimbo, you'd only be right about oen part of that, and no it's not the "bimbo" part. Lita you and I grew into wrestling at about the same time. You were in ECW, while I was in WCW... But then you moved from the ECW to the WWE, while I moved even lower, from the WCW, to the XPW. But one way or another you and I both ended up right here, in the EWA. And I know I'm gonna bust my butt to prove to everyone that even though I'm coming from a smaller Federation, I'm still gonna do just as good as you other Divas here. I think that against any of you, I stand a good chance of beating you, though I'm not even beginning to underestimate you, so don't worry. But I think, if I had to say who I thought my toughest opponent was, well it would have to be Lita. I mean, okay, she looks tough. The wild red hair, the tattoo, the muscles, her attire... But when you get in that ring and face her, you gotta know she's tough. After all those bumps she's taken... An example of that would be back in the WWE, when Trish pushed her off the top of a ladder, and onto a wooden table. Lita refused to stay on the stretcher, and have a neck brace, and the first thing she said was: "I'm gonna get that bitch"... Another example would be her high risk manaveurs that don't always work out. But what really shows it, is she's back here, after that surgery she had to get, back in the WWE. And she's still as tough as ever. I think after crashing onto the table, I probably would have wanted to pack my bags and go home. But not any more, now that she's done it, I'm dying to do it. Lita's the greatest. I could probably be perfetly honest if I said she was the nicest person abckstage. She knows her wrestling stuff, and even though she realizes she has tons of talent, she doesn't brag about it, or say she's the best or anything. Okay, it's true... She probably wouldn't have won the Womens Belt in the first place, without Rocks help, when he delivered a Spine-Buster to Stephanie, allowing Lita to give her a moonsault. But I feel that the only reason she wouldn't have won would be because of Triple H's and Kurt's interferences. So, it could be viewed as a fair exchange... But anyways, Lita did win. And she held onto that Title for a while. But then she lost it to the disgusting ape, Ivory. But, mind you, she wouldn't have lost it, if it wasn't for Edge and Christians little run in, that left her open for a pin, which Ivory got. So therefore, Lita never should have lost that Championship, especially to a woman like Ivory. But things like that happen, you just gotta pick up from where you lef toff, and go on with your life. Which is sometimes easier said then done. Lita, I respect you, I like you, I like your style of wrestling, and your attitude towards people. And I really do hope that you kick some major butt, and win that Womens Title tonight on Raw. Unfortunately though, I have to move on to the women that I'll be competing against tonight... Those of course being Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson...

~The fans give somewhat a mixed reaction at the sound of the two Diva's names. Major Gunns smiles and continues.~

>>>Major gunns a.k.a Tylene Buck<<<

It's not like I want to spend forever and a day out here talking about those two, but ti can't be helped, I'm cutting my first promo, after all... But I guess I could start off with the Long Legged Beauty, Stacy Keibler. Stacy, formerly known as Miss Hancock. Wow. There's so much to say about you. I mean, you and I... We feuded big time until I had to leave the WCW. You and I were always at each others throats. The usual thing you know, you thought you were better than me, and I thought I was better than you. And I proved that in our matches to, by beating you... That is until you pulled off that fake pregnant crap, after I gave you a blow to your stomache. Really, Stacy, you're just as bad as Stephanie! Now, I wouldn't like that if someone pointed that out to me, I'd have a quick attitude adjustment, which I think you should have... See Stacy, you go from boy to boy, never settling down but instead you just keep switching, never satisfied. Now, that does spell out the word "Slut" in my opinion. Or maybe it's not you moving around from different men. Maybe it's the men deciding you're not good enough for them. I can see why. You had two chances at that Womens Title in the WWE, and what did you do? You lost both times! You made a mockery out of WCW's Divas, all on your own, Stacy! Now how pathetic is that? Now that I come to think of it though, that suites you just fine... You've never been the brightest or best out of the bunch... The definition of pathetic suites you just fine, don't you think? Well, I wouldn't want to over-ride your brain, by actually making you to try to think, so I'll tell you... It does fit you perfectly. See Stacy, you go on insulting other beautiful women, such as Torrie, Lita, Trish, and even myself... But why exactly do you do that? To make you feel better about your own self? I don't blame you, I mean you're nothing special... I'm sure you think you are though... With those legs and everything. Well, hun, just because you've got abnormally long legs, does not mean you're something special, in a good sense anyways. You know stacy, back from the WCW, I got a lot of dirt about you... But I don't think any one could have put it better than Chavo Guerrorro! Chavo told the truth about Stacy, everything he said was the truth! Now I'm not saying that I haven't had my past... If anyone, you'd know about that. But, stacy, the past is the past, but the present is right now! And as of the present, I am saying I'm gonna kick your little blonde butt this Monday Night Raw! Stacy, you've never, ever, once beat Trish Stratus, or even Lita. And still now, I doubt you stand a chance against either one of them. I mean, it took you long enough just to beat Torrie Wilson! And stacey... You stand no chance of beating me! And if you think you do, well that just goes to show you that at least one dumb blonde still exists, that being you Stacy... You got your long legs, and your spinning heel kick... Well, you know what I got, Stacy? It's something you've never over comed... You've never once stood a chance against my Bulldog and my Bronco Buster! They're both moves that surpass your stupid kick and bitch slap any time, any where! But, okay, Stacy, I'm gonna focus on our match now, if I can. You still haven't made an appearance here. You haven't showed any signs of getting ready for your match, and I'm trying to figure out why exactly that is... Maybe you can tell me. Is it because you're confident aboutt his match, maybe even too confident that you don't even have to make a promo? Or maybe you think that you don't need to do anything to prepare for this match... Well, I guess if you're thinking that way it's gonna come as a shock to you, when I pin either you or Torie! But don't let it shock you to badly, Stace, cuz it shouldn't... Everyone here knows I'm going to win. It's just how things are. Plus you're already gonna be laid out and going to the hospital for what I do to you in that ring, you don't need to be treated for shock as well... When it's all said and done, Stace, it's gonna be me with my arm raised high in the air, in victory... It's gonne be me that Lillian declares as the winner! And not only that, Stacy, but it's gonna be me who goes on to face the Womens Champion at Summer Slam! Get it?! Got it?! Good! I won't put up with your crap, Stacy, like everyone else does here. I know the mind games you try to pull off on some people, but it's not gonna work for me. I know your strengths and I know your weaknesses and I'm gonna use those against you tonight on Raw. See, it's a good thing to make friends, Stace... But a bad thing to make enemies... Especially if one of those enemies is me! Everyones against you Stacy, so why don't you wake up and realize that? You're not the princess you were in WCW... Here you're what we call fair game... Like I said you're nothing special, and I'm gonna point that out, tonight. I'm gonna teach you who the dominant female is that was originally from WCW. There's something good about this match... You two are both from WCW... That makes it easier for me a whole lot easier. I know both of your strengths and weaknesses, I've been in the ring with both of you before, and I know you like the palm of my hand. You just better watch your back Stacy... Cuz you're gonna be in your most favorite position, when I'm done with you on Raw... Flat on your back! Hm does that position sound familar? Maybe that's because it was the position you were in the most with none other than your boss... Vince McMahon! Hmm... Maybe...

~The fans burst out in ear-popping cheers at this comment. Major Gunns snickers before she continues.~

>>>Major gunns a.k.a Tylene Buck<<<

There's just one more little girl I got to talk about... That, of course, is Torrie Wilson. Torrie... What is there to say? If we went by Stacy's words, you're a backstabber... You left her, at one point of time your best friend, and your company, for some Japanese guy, that ended up treating you badly... Then you moved on to greener pastures... Maven the rookie. Well, no, he's not too mcuh of a rookie. He's kinda cool, and kinda cute... But anyways, yeah, back to Miss Torrie Wilson. Tor, you shocked everyone, winning that Golden Thong Award, thing... But you know, I'm tempted to say that's because I wasn't in the competition... But I won't even go there... Tonight, Tor, you, stacy, and I go against each other and not jsut any old match... But a match with two spectacular stipulations. Not only will the winner go on to face the Womens Champion at Summer Slam, but this match is a... Bra and Panties Match! The match that makes the fans say everyone is a winner! Except, unfortunately, I'm not gonna be able to make them all a winner... I'm not gonna be able to give them what they want... See, we all know what they want is to see me in my bra and panties... But, in order for that too happen it would mean I'd have to lose. And that's just not gonna happen. So Torrie, I know you've made a name for yourself in this business now... But I have yet to do that. you saw when I arrived here that the Security Guards didn't know who the heck I was... Michael Cole, the EWA interviewer was told to interview Major Gunns, and he had no idea that Major Gunns would be me! So I have yet to make a name for myself, that has been shown tonight. That's why I'm siezing this oppurtunity on Raw, to beat both of you, and go on to hopefully beat the Womens Champion! I'm determined, Torrie. I'm down right determined to beat you. I know you've got the support of your buddies, Trish and Lita. And that's great, their cool chicks. But even with that, it won't stop me. See I might be weak and I might be little... But you know what they say, sometimes big things come in little packages... This little girl is gonna prove that big time... You better buckle your seat belt, Tor, cuz I'm gonna take you on one Hell of a ride. And you're not gonna wanna take me on again, I can guarantee you that... So, Torrie, get ready to be taken to a whole new level of eXtreme, as the EWA would put it. Cuz you're facing Major gunns, Tylene Buck, former member of the Misfits In Action, and I'll go by the code... I'll show my enemy no mercy! And unfortunately for you, Torrie... This Monday Night Raw, you are my enemy!

Now with that said... I need to get something off my chest... Literally... Hit the music!

~The fans go wild, cheering after her comments, but not sure what she meant by the last thing she said. Suddenly music with a heavy beat begins to blare over the PA System. Major Gunns paces the ring for a minute, soaking in the now silent crows. Suddenly, She stops, dropping her mic. She runs her hands up her body, following her curves, then her neckline. Her hands meet at the center of her shirts colar. Her hands linger there for a moment, then suddenly she rips the shirt, right down the center, and throws it off. Now revealing her camoflouged bra. The fans go crazy, cheering. The music changes to "Feel So Numb" by Rob Zombie. Listening and smiling to the cheers she's getting from the crowd, Major Gunns blows them one last kiss, then exits the ring. The scene fades and goes to a commercial brake, as Major Gunns walks up the ramp and disappears behind the backstage curtain.~

Part 3