Here are some old questions that people sent in to Ask Bandwagon Boy:
Here comes a email from someone and it goes Dear Bandwagon Bay I noticed that you seem to be a big fan of Mao Ying, the popular 7'6" rookie from China. I was surprised by this, as a quick check of the internet will show you that Mao is a notorious communist, and was responsible for the deaths of millions of people!
How can you possibly be a fan of this Mao Ying commie bastard!
Concerned, John Birch."
Well John you are right I look into this guy Mao Ying and he is one of the biggest commies EVER! Unreal he is way taller than Lennon or Stalling or Sadmn Husane or Jack Cherouac from France or any of them other commy pinkos! I can't belief that this pinko is allowed to come here to our countary and make millions of dollers from playing basketball it isent fair and he is a Commy and he aught to go back where he came from what a dirty commy I will never cheer for that pinko again! I dont think Shack is commy but I will look into it once Billy Ray hurries up and hackers up my computer so that I can use the googol again! Mao Ying the commy who would of thought it just goes to show you that you never know about some people it just figures! Looser!
Here is a great question from a girl from Kentucky! She goes "Dear Bandwagon Boy I love your website! I was wondering how you feel about ESPN announcer Dick Vitale? Here's a photo showing how Kentucky Wildcat fans feel about dick:
THERE IS NO PITCHER HERE THERE NEVER WAS YOU CANT PROOVE IT SO CRAM IT
Do you also love Dick? Your pal, Louisville Girl."
Dear Loseville Girl I LOVE Dick! I think he is the best and awesomest announcer in the world he is the only one with enough bravery to stick up for the Great Coach Kay and Duke against all the loosers who are against us and take cheapshots against us and call us names and act all JEALOUS! Dick Vital is the BEST and anyone who doesn't like him is a jealous looser! PS I love my Loseviller Cards this year with the awesome coach Rick Patino and Reese Davis the great player we are going all the way this year to the Finale Four and may be you and me can hook up at the big game do you know what I am saying write me back some more massages and you can get with me at the big game and it will be all that because I am a wicked awesome playa and I could rock you world!
p.s. dont tell my ball and chain about this dont call me at home just keep writting me Emails to this address but dont put any tittles on them like "I want you Bandwagon Boy" or else the old ball and chain wont understand! We have what is called a open relationship but I dont need her to find out about it do you know what I am saying piece out aight!
Here is the latest qestion it comes in from some looser and it goes "Dear Bandwagon Boy, I enjoy your site, but I have a question. On your page, you write about your "pole" "check it out and vote in it I will give the Winner a big fabalous prize I rule!" I was just wondering if anyone has won any "fabalous" prizes yet, and if so, who won and how did you choose a winner? What was the prize? Thanks."
Dear looser why don't you cram it! For you infomation there have been many Big Winners of fabalous prizes from voting in my pole! They won for voting the best and most oftenest and won a great prize that is probaly worth a lot of money! But you dident win because you are a looser who trys to come around and start up trouble by aksing a bunch of Nosey qestions why dont you mined you own busyness looser! Your pal, Bandwagon Boy.
Well here is a new question it comes from some guy named Avvelanch and he says "Dear BWB you are awesome! I wonder if you have seen this page: http://www.worldrps.com/ about the world Rock, Paper Scissors championship. Who is your favorite Rock Paper Scissors star? Do you have any commentary or "incite" on the championships?"
Well Avalanch oviously I knew all about this championships long agao and I called it that that guy would win! Maybe next year I will go to the championships myself and win it all because I always win at Rockpaper sissors whenever I play! It is so easy with my champion stratergy I never loose! I dont' know why some loosers shoot out paper or sissors those are looser plays take it from me throw out the ROCK! Rock smashes everthing! Are you telling me that a piece of paper or a pair of sissors could beat a ROCK in a fight! No way Hosea! So that is how I always win that game and I will go and win the big championships next year and become the Champion of the World it is so cool! I wander how big the champion belt is for rockpaper sissors it is probally made of Gold like in wressling it is going to rule to wear that big old belt around I cant wait to see Billy Ray's face when I come in to work with the big gold belt around my waste that will shut him up bigtime! Ha!
Here is qestion from some guy called Steve Blake it goes "Hey Bandwagon Boy, Ah kan't blieve thet you are celling your Tar Heals BBall stuf. Them are the awesomest teem ever - they throw that basketball so so fast, even witout Dean Smith."
Well Steve Blake that is the worst spelling I have ever seen in my life what is wrong with you! You type like a looser dont you even know that you look the fool if you have wrong spelling like that it is a desgrace! Go look up a dictionery or something! Anyways you qestion is allso dumb! I need to make room for all my new Angles World CHAMPS stuff and dont have room for all these old cloths that say Carolina on them! So I am selling them! So if any of you loosers out there still like Carolina tell me and I will sell you a lot of stuff CHEAP! Carolina stinks this year and they are loosers! It is not like in the olden days when we were awesome and won all the Championships but Dean Smith got suspended and so we went right down the toilet after that! But anyways Carolina is looser infootball and probaly basket ball too exept we got this AWESOME new freshmen named Rashad Feltoon and he RULEZ! He is going to score 40 a game and win the MVP of ACC trophy trust me I know these things and I am a expert! So maybe I will keep some of my Carolina stuff and put RASHAD FELTON name all over it to proove that I am not looser because FELTON RULEZ!!!
ps you spelling stink!
Here is a mail from jprichard and he goes "Dear Bandwagon Boy, I am a Tarheel fan. They are the greatest program in college basketball history. They are 10 times better than Dook. Why do all of Dook's senoir babies always cry when they play their last game at Dook? Is it because they know they really have no skills and will never again be as good as they were at Dook when Coach Kay tricked the refs into making every call in Dook's favor? This is why no Dookie ever really succeeds at the next lever. Go TARHEELS!!!"
What a looser you are jprichard! First you type "senoir babies"! What does that mean cant you even spell! Looser! And then you type "dook"! Can't you even spell DUKE! And then you go "the next lever"! What are you talking about next lever! Ha that is stupid they are playing basket ball not playing around with levers! Boy are you dumb and ignorent you cant even spell and you make youself look the fool! And then you try and criticize Duke! Ha what a joke Duke is BEST and you are looser! Looser! Jealous!
This is another email from the biggest moron in the world named Bob Green! His email number is email@example.com so email him and tell him how stupid he is! He is sending me crazzy threatning emails and personal attacks like a crazy jealous stocker! What a looser! He write: "Hey dork! Check out my new website Bucko! www.angelfire.com/ego2/bandwagonboyblows " This man = very stupid and dont worry sportfans you know that I already have my lawyer getting ready to throw this looser into court! Bob Green you are a jealous looser and you crazzy ileagle web site will be put down quick! Dont you even know who I am I am a famous journelest with 30 thousand hits of my websight! You are so stupid you dont even know that hits are when people click to you websight how many hits do you have on you looser web sight hardly NONE because you are looser! What a looser! You are so jealous of me that you spend all that money to make up a web sight against me and it is all full of lies! All I know is that I get my money's worth for my 50 dollers a week that I pay Billy Ray for putting up this web sight you wont be getting anything for all you money oonce I have you closed down you jerk! SO cram that one I cant belief you are so stupid! Anyone who thinks that Bob Green isent stupid write in and stick up for him and I will put you letters right here but I know I wont have to because everone know you are stupidest in the world! Looser! Ha! I WIN AGAIN I ALWAYS WIN GIVE IT UP BOB GREEN STUPIDEST EVER!!!! ps cram it jealous looser!!
This letter is from some idiot named Bob Green! He writes "Wow! Thats all I can really say. You websight is awesome but sense I am so jealous of you I will complain and aks you Do you know how to spell? Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for being such an enormous source of entertainment for all of us here at the looser office where I work for some guy smarter then me! Every so often all 150 of us gather around the computer and be jealous of how you are so awesome. Please don't ever stop being so awesome! it just wouldn't be awesome anymore! Thank you for making my dog feel smart! PS. Wow!"
Dear Bob Greene You are a looser Where is YOU famous websight and awards you dont have any! How DARE you to critisize my spelling dont you know who I am! Do you know that there is one word to call to people like you and that one word which fit loosers you so perfect is JEALOUS!!!!!!!!! JEALOUS!!!!
ps check out my internet there is lots of new stuff and awesome features and it is famous and won awards!
Here is a nice message I got in the email from someone called rsterkcingular! It goes "Dear Bandwagonboy, I really enjoyed your website. I am a special education teacher in Maryland and I have showed your website to all of my students and they really liked it! Everyday I try to tell them what they can do when they try! It just goes to show that retarded people can be great productive members of society. Great job!"
Well rsterkcingular Thank you for you complement! It is so true and you make a good point about how you are really giving everone a lesson by being able to teach school like that! I am glad that a retard is able to teach school! I had me some teachers what were retards but you probaly are smarter then them! So keep up the good work! You are setting a great example for other retards by being a "special" educational teacher!
Here is the latest email and it is from some one stupid name "Jonny U Fan' and it say this 'Bandwagon Boy how dare you wrote that horrible message on the Johnny Unitas Online Petition? Johnny Unitas wasa great quarterback and a superstar and a class individual! You are disgusting and offensive! If I ever find out who you are, I'm going to teach you a lesson!" Well Jonny U Fan what in the hell are you talking about I never wrote on any Online Jonny Unites partition that is a lie against me and I demand that you take it back beffore I sue you for slander and lying! And how dare you threaten against me that is a CRIME and you will pay you coward! If I dident have a bad leg I would go find you right now to kick you ass and teach you a lesson but I cant because I am hurt you are so lucky! And anyways I never wrote on any patition what are you talking about what a LIE how dare you dont you know who I am! When my lawyer gets through with you you will be so sorry you ever made up lies against me and threaten me! Jerk! So cram it Bucko!!!!! Jerk!
Here is another email I got the other day from some guy called New Human Growth Hormone what a dumb name! Anyways he write "We offer the Most Potent Oral GH (growth hormone) Formula available, backed up by 7 years of research, to help you achieve all this and more. Not all anti-aging products are created equal. Would you like to look and feel 10-20 years younger? Would you like to experience the following health and appearance benefits? Reduce body fat and build lean muscle without exercise, Lower blood pressure and improve cholesterol profile, Remove wrinkles and cellulite, Improve skin tone and texture? Turn back your body's biological time clock 10-20 years in 6 months of usage?"
Dear New Human Grow Hormoan yes I would! I am already pretty buff and dezel but I would like to be even more so who wouldent! But I am already really strong and can bench almost 200 pounds so dont even think about trying to fight me I will kick any man's ass I am not afraid and I dont take any crap! So there!
Here is the latest poem about Derrick Jeeter I got in the email! It is sent in from a kind of werdo called "Derrick Fan."
"Dear Bandwagon Boy, here is my poem about Derek Jeter. I felt that free verse would best express my innermost feelings.
"i have this recurring
where i meet derek
outside yankee stadium.
we go to the rainbow room
and dance slow and close
and stay out all night
talking of everything and nothing
that don't make me a queer, does it?"
That's it! Hope I'm not too late for the contest!
Derrick fan you are a werdo! What kind of a man dreams about dancing with another Man! And aks if he might be a queer probaly a werdo in my book! Not that theres any thing wrong with it hahahha thats like what they say on the Jerry Sinefeld Show about queers do you get the joke! Because it is a joke and funny! Those queers! Anyways you pome is all werd at the end why do you do that wake up and start likeing the wommen whats wrong with you boy! I should of known that a poem contest would bring out the light in the lofers crowd but what can you do!
Here is a new question it comes in from some jealous looser! It say "Dear Bandwagonboy, I really like your web site. Your article about poems for Derek Jeter was inspirational, and I have written one for your contest. My poem is called "Haiku for Derek Jeter":
The best "switch-hitting" shortstop!
Yanquis are loosers!
I have attached a picture of Derek to accompany (and explain) this poem.
I hope I win the contest. Your biggest fan, Jack"
Dear looser you pome was great until you write that Yankees (PS it is spell Y-A-N-K-E-E-S cant you spell anything you look like a fool with the bad spelling] are loosers! How dare you dont you know who has the most championships and won the most world serieieses and is the CHAMP and wins the most games and wins all the time! Yankees! And why do you send me in a dirty picture of some girl in a notty dress and a YANKEES hat it is desgusting and gross! Look here it is everone judge for youself!
What kind of porn-o page do you go to! What is the address of these porn-o pages filled with girls that are in dirty dresses and neglijays and naked and nude for everone to see! I demand that you admit what is the address on the interweb of these pages! Do it now are you jealous!
Here is a new qestion it come from some one name Big Dog of Boston DirtyDogs it goes "You have an unauthorized photo link on your website. Please remove the linked image from your site immediately and reply to this message when this process is completed so we may capture the screen for our affadavit records. In the future, please do not link your website to any graphic or copy content on BostonDirtDogs.com or any redirected domain pointing to our registered URLs." Dear Boston DirtyDog it is not my fault I dident do it the picture was send to me by one of my fans who is name Texas Con Man that is all the info I have on him I will turn over any other info on that criminel if I get it! I am a big famous inter net journelest so I have many fans that send me pictures all the time so you can see it is not my fault it is that otehr guys fault! Everone know I am a BIG fan of the CHAMPION Yankees and so I get sent a lot of pictures of superstars like the great Rodger Clemmens so oviously it is not my fault you aught to sue that Texas Con Man person I will help you if you want just let me know I have a LOT of big high power attorneys and I always win in court so oviously you aught to think about that bucko! You must be a big fan of the Yankees and Dimondbacks too if you have photos of Rodger Clemmens on you web sight so we are probaly a lot alike I would check out you web sight but I do not have time right now because I am so busy and importent but I am sure it is probaly almost as good as my web page which offers the finest coverage of all the Champion teams! So anyways you can oviously see that it is not my fault and I never did anything wrong but if you want me to help you sue that creep Texas Con Man I will help you! If I am not too busy!
Here is a new photo of Rodger Clemmens with his Hero team mate Derrick Jeeter stretching out like they do beffore every big game! This picture was sent in to me by some guy calls himself "Yankme Fan" and so do not try and sue me BigDirty Dog because I did not steal it so cram it! How dare you threaten me do you know who I am! I will put any picture I want to on this web sight because it is MINE!! What are yo uoging to do about it! Nothing! I have a call in to my lawyer right now and you will soon be sorry! PS Yankees RULE! NUMBER #1 World Champs! Cram it!
Here is a new qestion "Dear Bandwagon Boy, Many people feel that the career of Jack Dempsey was better served by his defeat at that hands of Gene Tunney in their legendary 1926 bout. With the controversial "slow count," Dempsey and his supporters could forevermore claim a moral victory of sorts, cementing Dempsey even further in the hearts and minds of the American public. As the Tyson-Lewis fight looms, one can't help but long for the great pugilists of bygone eras rather than the Tweedledee vs. Tweedledum showdowns of our own.
Sighing for the Sweet Science"
Dear Signing for Sweat Scientists what are you talking about! First of all let me tell you that NO ONE gives a flying crap about olden days people from 1926 or whenever! Second of all if this Jack Tunney lost then he is a looser dont give me any of this crap about Mortal victorys there is no such thig you either are a winner like me or a looser like you period that is the bottom line! Second of all Mike Tyson is a great American Hero and he will whup the tar out of Louis Lenocks or Tweedeldee or whoever dares to get in the ring with him Tyson is the champ because he is so bad and tough and crazy and plus he is ripped and deicel and buff and everone is scare of him! So for you infomation everthing is better now than it was in the olden days and everone knows it! Nobody cares about olden times except for old people who are sennile or something! Why don't you get on the winning team and cheer for great champions like Mike Tyson instead of pertending that it is still the 1926 with no airplains or cellphones or TVs or video games or hot water or french frys or all the good stuff we have now! Get with the program and face facts anyone from now would slotter any of those olden days boxxers who couldnt even lift weights or punch hard and had big mustashes and greassy hair! I bet Mike Tyson can bench over 200 pound you old boys didnt even know what a benchpress was they probaly didnt even have steroids or anything either! Ha what a joke face it the olden days sucked and everthing is great now get with the winning team you old geyser!
Here is a new question it comes in from some one name "I Love Kristie Kerr!"
"Dear Bandwagon Boy what do you think of women's golf CHAMPION Kristie Kerr? Here's a great photo of her. She is a winner, so I wonder if you like her as much as I do."
Dear "I Love Womens Golf" I dont have time to follow such looser girly sports as girls golf. That Kerr girl might have tallent or desire or what ever but I dont have time to get into the like of her! Why do I care about girls golf I DON'T thats why! I cant figure out why any MAN would bother following girls golf enough to find a picture on the inter net are you sure you are a REAL man! I will give thsi Krissy girl credit she is a winner and she is hot but I dont know why you are all hot and bothered over her who cares!
This qestion comes in from a person calling themselfs "Loyal Maryland Terrapins Fan": "Dear Bandwagon Boy I notice that you now claim to be a Maryland fan, but you still have those pictures of Coach Kry from Duke on your website. Are you still a Duke fan, even though they choked and lost like loosers? Or are you a real MAryland fan? If you are a real Maryland fan, you would not have pictures of Coach Krybaby on your website. So which is it, BWB? Are you a Maryland fan or a Duke fan?"
Dear Loyal Marryland Terpins Fan shut up jerk!
This qestion comes from some one name Stasy Braukman it says "Hey Bandwagon Boy do you think that Wake Forest can go all the way this year? My team is the UNC Tar Heels but they're having a terrible season. And I hate Duke and Maryland and Virginia and all the other ACC teams except for Clemson, but then I started thinking hey, maybe the Demon Deacons could be college basketball's team of destiny just like the Patriots in football. What do you think? Signed, BigDiggy"
DigBiggy what are you talking about Wake Forrest is no good! They are all right for a looser team but they are no match for my faverite teams Duke Marryland Kansas and Cincinati who all whupped them! So there you go they have no chance NONE! My Patriats were the team of density this year not Wake Forrest they are no good! But how can you like Carolina they STINK! And how can you hate Duke nad Marryland Wow you dont know nothing about college basket ball if you like Carolina and hate Duke and Marryland! You need to read my websight and learn about some basket ball!
Here is a new question: "Bandwagon Boy First of all I just wanted thank you for haveing the best site on the whole World Wide Intranet. I check it every morning for you expert commentary and Incite. I have two question for you if you have time to anwser them. I used to like Micheal Jordan as my favorite player in the NBA. Hes kinda loosing his skills though so I was wondering if you could help me pick a new favoirte player. It would help if its a TarHeeel.
Kris from Chapel Hill"
dear Kris from Chapel Hill that is easy you should love Shack! He is the biggest and badest player EVER and is dominate! He is not a Tarheel because he did not go to college he had no time to waist on that nonsince he went straight ot the pro's and has been dominate for years now! Plus he has alblums and fillms so what more do you need Shack is the Number #1 man of the whole NBA babay!!!!!
This qestion comes in from some one named Teddy Valentine! Here is the question! "Dear Bandwagon Boy I love your "websight" and check it frequently to get the latest "incite" on Duke basketball. Here is a joke for you: Who is Duke's prettiest cheerleader? Answer: Duke Vitale. Check out this picture! Your pal, Teddy Valentine."
Dear Teddy Valentin you are a looser! What in the world are you doing with a filfthy picture like that one! First of all Duke has teo or three cheer leaders that are prettier then that! Second of all what in the world is Vital doing dressing up as a woman! I use to love him and think he was the best journelist and broad caster on TV but I didnt know he was some kind of a Transylvestite! Thats desgusting! What a sicko! But maybe he was just joking around when he dressed up like that it is funny for a man to dress up like a girl as a joke as long as they dont like it! So thats probly what that desgusting picture is! Third of all why are you passing around sicko pictures like that of a great man Dick Vital! if thats you idea of a joke it is not funny mister! Why dont you tell some funny jokes like the ones about the pollack screwing up a lightbulb! Now that is funny not the sicko picture of a great man dressed up like a transylvestite! Sick! You are desgusting! And you call youself a Duke fan why dont you go cheer for Carolina where you bellong! Sicko looser!
This is a question that came in in the email!
"Dear Bandwagon Boy,
I was looking through the archives of a MLB Web board and came across this post:
"Well, just like I said all allong, the AWESOME Mark Macguire is the AWESOME home run champ of all TIMES!!!!! I new all along he would take out Joe Demageo's record of 56 homeruns in a season!!!! Demageo, "the Scooter" was great back in the olden days but the new AWESOME home run king of ALL TIME is MACGUIRE, babay!!!!!!!!!! Nobody will EVER beat this record!!!!!! You heard it hear first!!!! Demageo is a LOOSER! Macguire RULEZ!!!!!"
So, Bandwagon Boy, do you know anything about this?
I Need to Get A Life!"
Dear "I Need to Get A Life" you do need to get one! A Life! I don't know why you would send me that stupid posting from some mororn who was oviously a looser! You might not know it but Berry Bonds just broke Macguires home run record this season! So there goes this guy's dumb perdiction! And Joe Demageo was not called the Scooter he was called "the Yankee Splinter" because he was so awesome for a player back in the olden days! But those guys back then were no good compare to the superstarz of today! Demageo only hit 56 homers that is nothing he wouldn't even start for the looser Devilrays these days! But he was a great champion and hero back in the olden days when he won the championship about 15 times and was a war hero and married Marlyn Monroe and people say he probaly killed her but no one could ever proove it so he went free! But still he was a great American for those days! But everone has got better so therefore hence the record was shattered by Macguire and then Berry Bonds! So that posting is dumb dont you have anything better to do then dig around in old computer messages that are anonamouse and no one can ever know who really typed that message! No matter what so dont bother trying! What are you a stocker or something! You better not be stocking me boy! I will have my lawyers sue you to the pourhouse if you even think it! So dont! And get a life looser!
Here is a question that I got in the email "Hey B-wagon B-boy, A very smart friend of mine pointed out to me that the Red Sox are losers and I should back the Yankees because they are serious about winning. I thought no way until they got Giambi and announced they were gonna build a new stadium--now I see my friend was right all along because the Red Sox would never do either of those things because they are stupid and dont care. Should I say the hell with the Red Sox and buy a bunch of Yankees stuff? signed, Roto Rooter"
Rotorooeter what kind of question is that why would anyone ever root for the Red Sox they stink they have never won the championship and they are loosers! Of course you should root for the Yankees I love them they are my favorite American League team and they are great and smart and winners not loosers! So yes you aught to go out and buy youself lots of Yankees gear because we are awesome and great and will win it all again and the only ones smart enough to sign up Giambi! PLus they represent all of American now and if you are a patriot like me then you better cheer for the Yankees or else you love Osmama Ben Ladin! So oviously dump the looser Red Sox and start rooting for the Yankees duh! And also the Dimondbacks in the other league! YANKS RULE!!! DIMONDBACKS RULE!! WORLD CHAMPS!!!
This is a question from a person name "Tenis Lover." "Dear Bandwagon Boy I love tennis! Who is your favorite tennis player of all time?"
Dear Tenis Lover tenis is a girly sport that is to wussy for me to waste a lot of my time on! It is for loosers mostly! But I do have a faverite player of all times and that is Anne Cornokover! Wow she is hot! I like to watch her run around on the tenis court because she is so hot! So she is awesome and is my faverite tenis person of all times! Here is her picture you can see how she is so great at tenis!
Here is a question: "Dear Bandw