3 things I plan to accomplish in the next 5 years
Just about a year ago, I thought my life would never it's happy ending. I'd convinced myself that I would be alone for the rest of my life and wouldn't ever have somebody to hug, kiss and love. That all changed on the night of April 16, 2003. I had recently broken up with my boyfriend of 1 1/2 years when I hear a voice from the past. A DIFFERENT ex of mine whom had been searching for me for the past 2 years. I couldn't stand him, but I apreed to give our friendship another chance. After all, I didnt have anything else to do. I drove my 1997 pontiac grand prix over to his house where he was still living. We went out, met with a friend of his whom I'd know the years before. Afterwards, we got something to eat then, went back to his house where we just goofed around. He was showing me all these pictures of girls whom he'd met while we were apart. And he also showed me all of MY pictures that he still had in his "Bella Carmela" folder. I really wasn't surprized, I just wanted to go home. He told me to stay for a little longer, to show me some things online. While I did decide to sit back down, I felt a weird feeling in my tummy when one of his buddies came online and appeared on his buddy list. He casually IMed him and started chatting. I just sat there quietly watching. Pretty soon I became quite anxious and wanted to know a little more about this "Tony Berretta" guy. So he mentioned to him that I was here and showed him a picture or two of me. I couldn't stop smiling. My cheeks were red like a firetruck and I didn't know why. I asked my friend some common questions, like, is he HOT!? He said yes he's goodlooking and showed me a picture and I most certainly agreed. I just wanted to talk with him. Shortly after Tony had seen my pictures he madea cute remark. "Ask her if she'll go to prom with me. ;)" I felt this huge hot bubbly feeling in my stomach. I didnt even knew who he was and I liked him!? Impossible right? WRONG. My friend wasn't too happy with our flirting escapade simply because he was trying to get back with me. I thought, "TOO BAD!!" lol I took over the keyboard and started chatting with this gorgeous guy for a little bit. I showed him a web page of me & more of my pictures. I knew he had found me attracted and was so happy! I was all smiles, at this point my jaw was hurting. I just couldn't stop. I gave him my email address and screen name and told Ron I was going home because I was "tired." :) I hopped in my car after saying goodbye and raced home because all that was on my mind was Tony. When I got home, I ran into the house to the computer that was in my living room. I immediately emailed him saying, "Hi, It's Carmela. We chatted a bit at Ron's house and I want to get to know you better. You seem really nice." I left it short and simple. 2 minutes later I got an IM from him! I had butterflies in my tummy, I felt like I was in first grade developing my first crush. We talked that night for a while, getting to know each other and I gave him my phone number. I told him to call me sometime. Days went by and we talked everyday. Online AND on the phone. He gave me recents pictures of him and I showed him all the 100's+ pics that I had. I noticed I really was starting to like him and I wanted to meet him in person. I never had a problem getting boyfriends, it was finidng the RIGHT one that was difficult. I was almost sure that me and him wouldn't go any further than this. Especially because in July I was moving to Florida with my family. That was too huge a problem to bring into a relationship, considering it would be right in the beginning, to me at least. But, it didn't stop me from talking to him and meeting him one Saturday afternoon. April 26, 2003 I took the 294 highway to go see him. 1 hour drive, on a good day with no traffic. I got lost after getting to his town, but after calling him, he guided me to his house. I finally arrived and was nervous as heck! I added more lip gloss to my lips and made sure my hair was perfect, then i called him to let him know I was here. I started walking to the side door, my heart pounding and those butterflies still fluttering in my tummy. I opened the door and walked. His house was being redone, he came out of the other door across from me at the same time and I greeted him him a flirty "Hi!" and a big smile. I wanted to give him a sweet kiss on his cheek with a hug, but instead, I just gave him a warm hug. I didn't want to let go! But, I did. We went in. I met his mom, dad and 3 brothers. His brothers at the time were 16, 14, and 7. I have 2 brothers that were 7 and 14. Me and Tony were both 18. I thought that was pretty neat. All I was missing was a 16 year old brother. We hung out together that day. We went back to my house then back to his. I think it was the day we played mini golf by me. I don't remember, it was then or the second time, he probably knows. I know we went to my park too and played a fun playful game of basketball. He beat me. That first night ended great. I stayed kinda late, we gave each other a hug and I left to go home. By the time I got home I had no gas! lol A LOT of driving. I wrote him an email letting him know I got home safe and got ready for bed. I miss him. I missed him a lot. I wanted to go back to him and hug him again. We were still in highschool trying to finish up our senior year. He finished, I didn't. All during the week we talked on the phone, online and left emails for each other. I couldnt wait to him him the following weekend. I saw him again. We hung out together going to my house and then back to his. To the park, mini golf. One night while I was at his house in late April 2004, we shared our first kiss! It was so great and made me feel so happy. I liked him so much! Soon enough Prom weekend approached and the week before while we were talking on the phone he had asked me if I wanted to go with him. My face felt so hot and those butterflies were back again. I of course said yes! Trying to find a dress was a pain but I soon found a nice black one and planned to wear that. May 2, 2003, Prom Night, I drove to his house. We were going with a group that he knew some people in it. I had entered his house to see his mom to the left of me and his dad slightly further away to my right in the kitchen. I was standing in front of the washing machine when Tony came to me through the kitchen and we had kissed each other on the cheek to say hello. The butterflies were going crazy! Before we left to go to the kids house who was having the pictures taken there me and tony were sitting on the couch while his dad was sitting on the other couch trying to shine up his black shoes really nice and he was making jokes that we were laughing to. I drove me n tony to the group's house and his parents came also in their ford expedition. We took very nice pictures outside in the sun, me and him, and the group. We took nice pictures by the fireplace and in front of the limo. The day was starting off so so great. We climbed in the limo and enjoyed the ride there. I had my hair straight but when I arrived I wanted it back to my natural. (curly) I wanted to look so pretty for tony. We ate and we flirted and laughed and had such a great time. We didnt dance though. I didn't care, I just wanted to be with him for the whole night. We took funny and cute pictures. The night at the banquet hall ended and we went back to the kids house in the limo where we flirted and laughed the whole way. We ended up going to some other kids house and stayed there for a couple of hours. I had changed into my dkny blue jeans and a tshirt. Me and tony played a game of pool and had so so much fun. We got back to his house id say around 1 or so. We stayed up for a long time and I loved every minute of being with him. By 6 am we decided I should go home. I didnt want to leave. We gave our hugs and kisses and I left to go home arriving around 7 am or so. I wrote tony an email telling him i was safe. It was the best night of my life. It was the best senior end of the year ever even though I didnt get to graduate on time. The rest of the month was great. We hung out every week and when school finished I was seeing him every other day or so. We shared our first I love you's during that time. It was wonderful. I REALLY loved him a lot. We made our dating "official" on may 16th at night around 9pm. I had to get my gallbladder taken out on june 6, 2003 He ended up "running" away with me on june 5th to my house to stay for a week or so to keep me company while I recovered. But when his dad found out he wasnt too happy. That was when hell started. But before he called we had gone to walmart where tony bought me 2 lions! (my FAVORITE animal) He bought me a REALLY REALLY big one and a small one. Tony had called ron and david. 2 friends because his dad was being really nasty and making threats. To cut to the point, That night his dad came and brought him back home. It was a bad and sad time. The next morning i went to the hospital with my mom and dad and had the surgery done. When I woke up in the room Only my mom was there. I didnt know where tony was and i was scared and worried and I just wanted him by me. He ended up calling me that morning telling me he ran away again because he couldnt take it there his dad really hurt him. So he asked me to call ron (the guy who i met tony from in the first place) and he ended up picking tony up and they came to visit me at the hospital. When I saw him ..... I was so happy. He stayed by my bedside the whole time he was there holding my hand and kissing my forehead. I loved him so much. He only stayed a couple hours. That night he stayed by ron and the next morning he came with his dad to the hospital where he stayed with me for hours and hours until I had to leave to go home. He walked me down the hall holding my hand and everything.
