01*29*2k3
~Insomnia~

so here i am.. cant sleep....... waitin on Habibi.... habibi habibi ya nour el ein.....

i know i havent been on.... been busy.... gettin ready for skoo next week.... spent like 900 dollars on skoo shyt.. and im still not finished shopping... have to buy like 4 more boox.. fuking poli sci is killin me.... each book is like sitty dallaz... and i have to buy 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! shyt sux mad dicc i tell ya.... oh well dont wanna think about it.....

its gettin late anyways.. dont think Hab'z is gonna show... so ama bounce...... gotta wake up early tommorow too... so TTFN (ta ta for now)... xoxoxox Ciao




01*25*2k3
~DAGO~

well tommorow's super bowl.... i can imagine how hectic its going to be... i went to Coronado today and uwwff.. let me tell u.... traffic was BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD..... downtown was bad too.. thousands of ppl were there.... in the gaslamp district... all gettin ready for manana.... its gonna be crazy

i took out my tounge ring....... feels wierd not having it on anymore...

im so tired thooo... had a looooooooooong day... so ama go mimis now...... nity nite




01*24*2k3
~why pamper lifes complexities when the leather runs smooth on the passenger seat?~

why care about me?... why care about my well being? so i can be another one on your long list of discrepancies?

i know about these things...... so much.. about it all....

u should worry about ur others.... ur impersonals.... ur late night encounters... quickies... ur 'but she didnt mean anything to me' hostess'...

i am but a punctured ballon... falling from the sky... injured.. and desolate"




01*22*2k3
~howdee dooo deee~

today was quite lovely... heard from wun of mah old palz... (we both share a popeyes account..lol)... had a few late feez and a few OVERDRAWN account problemz cuz SOMEONE dun over ATE that gumbo soup and chiccen wangz... lol..... but iz all good.... we got it all cleared up....

other than that.... shytz been ok.. jus kinna nvs cuz skool is gonna start next week..... gotta get bacc in2 full time nerd mode again..

oh dear...... tiz 1158......... me-za gotsta go bye bye now........ ciao




01*21*2k3
~weekend~

went to Mideveal Timez...... my love took me there and made wish number 7 come true...lol... we got to see the horse show... then we ate like barbarians while watching the tournament with the king........ it was sooooooooo much fun.... then we went to the museum afterwardz and learned :)...

i want to go to Wizardz again..... maybe we will go sometime soon.. that place is coo too

well.. ama go finish watchin Dayz of our Livez..... gotta catch up on all the juicy stuff..lol




01*16*2k3
~so im living..big fuccing deal~

why am i living in this piece of shyt place called life........... i never asked to b here....... i never asked to go thru complications... i never asked to express those pitiful emotions we call laughter... or to experience the worthless joys that brought them about.. never asked to smile a smile of emptiness... or to cry tears of unfulfiling pleasures... i never asked to be in stupid situations with stupid people... never wanted to be in this shitty fukd up place.. this is so pathetic... its not fair..... never could really understand why we "cant" take our own life... when we never "asked" to be here..... i mean besides religion... blah blah blah....... who the fuk says i cant do shit...... why...... if its a higher being... why does she/he put us in retarded situations that are going to make us want to drift towards the road with a dead end....... is it to make us stronger? to survive and then later perhaps help someone who went through the same thing? or is it mere speculation that we THINK we cant do shyt.. and then when we put up with the bullcrap we THINK we are strong; thus putting ourselves once again in the line of fire for another dumb situation? is that it? if not... what is?

am baaaaaaaaacc........

went to court today and turned in mah shyt.... so am good to go

*watchin Howard Stern*

he got some funky ppl up in there..

i tasted that new chiccen thingy from miccey d'z... it was aight.. but i will stop talkin bout food cuz me-za gonna git hungry...

*still watchin Howard Stern*

well..... am tired so ama go hit the hizead now... k buh bye

life is so retarded @ times....... people have issues...they suspect everything... and then drag u in2 their shyt....accusin & bitching about all your negative characteristics.. u know wuts funny tho... when u know everything they are doing... all the dirty shyt... and they have no clue that you know... u just sit bacc.. relakz... watch & hear all the little lies... all the pathetic blah blah blahs they have to say.....

its funny how those that accuse are those who are the ones ACTUALLY engaging in the so called "back stabbing" actz....

a little psychological displacement for you all

passed my test.... so its off to court i go... hopefully i get my certificate on time tho.. dont want to extend

well the weekend is finally here... wut to do... wut to do

hopefully it rains again.... been in a real sluggish mood lately...... just want to stay @ home

dont really want to deal w/ppl

want to be in peace while i drink mah Godiva hot chocolate (which reminds me.. havta go out and by some more.... and while am doin that... i should get some cheescake too huh..... oreo cookieeeeeeeee or macadamia nut *drools*) w/whipped cream... mmmmmmmm... and watch movies all day looong

ohhh the luxuries of being off of school...

but i must take advantage for in a couple of weeks... the brain torture will begin...

got that dayum song in my head........ blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

foccin kelly osbourne

today wuz boring... as alwayz..... didnt do much.... jus wandered about in this house.... slept... ate... took a shyt.. u know... the routine

tonight am looking foward to Howard Stern..... he got that top 20 or sum shyt.. goin on.. figure ill catch a few laffs b4 i catch them zzz's....

ohm... i dont think me becoming more psycho is possible... but then again..... u never know....

well today wuz an ok day..... didnt do much but sleep... seems like ive become an insomniac once again..... feels like i had 212,214,664,354,546 bottles of starbucks coffee

think i should take some melatonin.... hold on.... k bacc...... just took a pill.. hopefully ill fall asleep right now...

in the meantime... i am going to watch Anna Nicole on her hot date...he bought her some doggy bakery food for sugar pie...lol.... wut a maroon

hmmm.... wut would i do if i were to die tonight... where would i go..... what would i see... what would i smell... who would think about me... would people be glad or would they be sad.... would i be remmembered..... if so as wut.... would i see my dog... would i be able to fly... would i see that bright light that everyone talks about.... who would greet me and lead me down that tunnel... would i be able to finally joke with my spirit guide in person... or shall i say in spirit...... would i see people smoke cigarettes.. would they be prone to getting cancer... if they do... do they die all over again.... where do they go if they die..... would i go there as well...... how would i die in that world.... so does that mean that i reincarnated into another plane..... something astral........ spiritual..... mortal perhaps.... what is life... how is it defined.... is it fully destroyed...... or do we just collect memories and store them somewhere hypnotik...

ya.. i think tonight would be a good night to die..... many questions would be answered