HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY
//At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars.
//Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
//Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
//Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in".
//Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."
//Dont use any punctuation marks
//As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
//Ask people what gender they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
//Sing along at the opera.
//Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
//Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
//Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
//Have your teachers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard Kim.
//When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!", "I won!" "3rd time this week!"
//When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "run for your lives, they're loose!!"
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