Chapter 20

Erik was sleeping on the sofa in the sitting room when the guys finally returned home from the party. Jacob went right to the guesthouse. He hadn’t said a word to anyone during the entire ride home.

"I wonder what the note says," Ashley said softly.

"Man, I hope it doesn’t say what I think it does," Trevor said, sadly, looking at his feet. After a minute, he disappeared upstairs. They heard his bedroom door close.

Erik yawned and woke up. He smiled. "Hey, guys. It’s about time you’re back. It must’ve been a great party, huh?" Dan and Ashley exchanged looks. Erik frowned. "It wasn’t a good party? Why? What happened?" Dan sighed as he sat down next to Erik on the couch.

"You’ll never believe it," he said and proceeded to relate the evening’s activities to Erik.

Jacob put the envelope down on the bed. He looked at it. He didn’t want to read the letter that was inside the envelope. Had Maria really been that upset? Was she so upset that she’d just take off and leave everything behind her…including him?

"Get a grip, Jake. Just read the damn thing," he said. He picked up the envelope. Taking a deep breath, he opened it. He slowly unfolded the sheets of hotel stationary. He began to read:

Jacob closed his eyes tightly. He clenched and unclenched his fist. She was gone. She had just written him aletter and left…maybe for good. The thought of never seeing her again hurt in a way that nothing ever had.

Walking calmly over to the window, Jacob stared down into the dark pool area. The water looked black with no lights on. ‘She can’t be gone,’ Jacob thought. The letter said otherwise. The letter. Maria couldn’t even say ‘goodbye’ to his face.

"I love you, Maria," Jacob said. He then took his left hand, the hand that held the letter, made a fist and punched the window hard, shattering the glass.

"What was that?" Ashley asked. He and Dan were still filling Erik in on what had happened at the party when they heard the sound of breaking glass.

"Jacob," Dan said, jumping up and running to the guesthouse. Ashley and Erik followed close behind him. They saw glass on the ground down below one of Jacob’s bedroom windows. The window had shattered. The three of them ran up the stairs.

"Jake!" Ashley called out. No answer. Dan found the door unlocked and slowly entered Jacob’s room, afraid of what he’d see.

Dan heard Erik gasp. Jacob was sitting on the floor, cradling his left hand in his lap. His shirt was soaked with blood, but Jacob didn’t seem to notice. He was just staring aimlessly straight ahead.

"I’m gonna call Kristi," Erik said as he took off down the stairs again.

"Should we call the Mikes?" Ashley asked. Dan shook his head.

"No. We can’t have a bunch of people around now. It will only make things worse." Dan inched closer to Jacob. He grimaced at the mess that was Jacob’s left hand. The knuckle was bloody and Dan could see where the glass had torn Jacob’s skin. "Jake? Are you okay?" he asked softly.

"She’s gone. She wrote me a ‘Dear Jacob’ letter and just left. Just like that, she’s out of my life. How can she do that to me?" Jacob asked, hurt and confusion showing in his dull, blue eyes.

"Man, I’m sorry," Dan said, putting his arm around his band mate. Ashley had gone across the hall to the bathroom and returned with a wet towel. He handed it to Dan, who gently put it over Jacob’s mangled hand.

Erik ran back into the room, his cell phone in his hand. "I called Kristi. Luckily, she was still up. She’s on her way over now. I’ll go wait for her," he said and once again, he ran out of the room.

"Can we get you anything?" Ashley asked Jacob, who sighed.

"Maria," he said, softly. Ashley looked worriedly at Dan, who shrugged. They didn’t know what Maria’s letter had said. Obviously, it hadn’t been good. There wasn’t anything that they could do about it, though. All they could do was stay with Jacob and make sure that he didn’t hurt himself again.

Emily dragged a half-asleep Sarah into the loft…where she proceeded to drop the younger girl to the floor.

"Shit! What did you do that for?" Sarah asked, her words still slurring slightly.

"Because you deserve it," Emily said, angrily. Sarah frowned.

"I’m going to bed, I feel like shit," she said.

"Not yet. I have a few things to say to you first." Sarah remained sitting on the floor as Emily talked to her. "I can’t believe how immature and stupid you acted tonight. Shit, Sarah. You made a damn fool of yourself!"

"I didn’t mean for anything to happen," Sarah said, holding her head in her hands.

"Oh, really? You got drunk and tried to take advantage of Trevor, but you didn’t mean for anything to happen? Bullshit! You knew exactly what you were doing. Maria was looking for you practically all night. Did you know that? Did you know what Jocelyn had done? She set up this stupid thing honoring Maria and it turned out that she had had doubles made of the photos from the disaster. You know, the ones that had upset Maria so much. On top of that, the twin brother of the cop who was killed in front of Maria was there to meet her! Maria was devastated. Then, she walks in on you and Trevor making out, which ends with you saying that you hate her and wishing that she’d disappear and never come back. Well, I hope you’re happy because it looks like you got your wish! I wouldn’t blame Maria if she didn’t come back. With a sister like you, she should just stay wherever the hell she went. She’s much better off!" With that, Emily walked angrily to their room, slamming the door behind her.

Sarah sat on the floor, tears sliding down her cheeks. She put her hands over her face and started sobbing.

Emily took a deep breath, trying her best to calm down. She didn’t regret anything that she’d just said to Sarah. Sarah deserved it. She had really crossed the line with her behavior tonight. Emily pulled the note from the envelope that Susan had handed her. She sat down on her bed to read it.

Emily wiped tears from her eyes. She was glad that Maria was doing what she needed to in order to feel sane, but Emily would miss her.

The door slowly opened and Sarah appeared. Her face was wet from her tears. She quietly went to get her pajamas and left to go to the bathroom to change. Emily sighed. She stood up and knelt to get the shoebox that was under her bed. She pulled it out and opened it. She put Maria’s note in the box and picked up the picture of Travis. Emily stared at it. ‘If you had just held on a little longer, we could’ve gone away together like we’d planned. Why did you have to die?’ she thought. Emily swallowed hard as tears made their way down her face. She placed the picture back in the box and closed the lid. She felt badly about the way that she’d treated Ashley at the party, but it was just too hard to look at him. His resemblance to Travis was uncanny and it hurt for her to look into his blue eyes…eyes that were so similar to Travis’. Emily sighed as she began to change. Life sucked.

Kathleen was sitting with her back leaning against Kevin. They were on the couch in her apartment. Kathleen was holding Maria’s note in her hand.

"Just read it. You’ll go crazy if you don’t," Kevin told her.

"I know. I just don’t want it to say that she’s gone for good. I mean, she’s my best friend, I can’t stand the thought of her not coming back," Kathleen said, sadly.

"You don’t know if it says that. Just read it and see," Kevin said. Kathleen sighed. She opened the envelope, unfolded the stationary and read.