darkestdays Darkest Days

Darkest Days

there are times
when I'm just a shell
where I do not feel anything for anyone
all I feel is hollow and bruised
used up and misused
forced to be someone I don't want to be
have I failed somehow or someway
will the weight of today
finally pull me down to drown
in the depths of despair
where I am alone
except for my rage
my rage
my pain
I hate my darkest days



Everything I Touch (I Break)

the more I feel
the more I die
nothing to give
nothing inside
everything I touch
I break
I wanna break you down
I scratch and tear
until it bleeds
I do not want
I only need
everything I touch
I break
I wanna break you down



How Can I Hold On? (Dog Attack)

back when you were in my life
you gave me something that I could live for
now everything's changed
and you're gone
but I'm still here waiting
so how can I hold on
with nothing to hold on to
why should I hold on
when there's nothing to hold on to
sex made me feel alive
but now I'm so bored with mindless passion
drugs were someplace to hide
but theyíve left me feeling cold and empty
so how can I hold on
with nothing to hold on to
why should I hold on
when there's nothing to hold on to
I thought you were my friend
that you were someone that I could turn to
but now I realize
you were a friend when you needed something
so how can I hold on
with nothing to hold on to
why should I hold on
when there's nothing to hold on to



Drugstore

you seduce me
lonely in your hell
naked and hungry
I crawl into your cell
a virtual drugstore is piled on your bed
I can't resist with your tongue inside my head
how can everything be justified by you
you get off on watching me bleed
you get off on feeding my disease
this time will be perfect you explain
but your tongueís as deadly
as a needle through my vein
how can everything be justified by you
how can my demise be justified by you
I'm so tired of living for your touch
I'm so tired of needing you so much
how can everything be justified by you
how can everything be justified by you
how can my demise be justified by you
when did I decide to be crucified by you
how can everything be justified by you
by you



You Complete Me

I am lost
in the darkness
between two worlds
and here I'm struggling
you're the light
I've been seeking
'cause my whole life
there's been something missing
only you
can make me whole
just one touch
you complete me
rescue me from this black hole
thatís sucked me in and left me dying
you're the truth that I've been seeking
'cause my whole life I've been lying
only you
can make me whole
just one touch
you complete me
god, I pray
you find me worthy
of the right to stand beside you
and of your truth
and of your passion
and of the right
to sleep beside you
only you
can make me whole
just one touch
you complete me



Save Yourself

I know your life is empty
and you hate to face this world alone
so youíre searching for an angel
someone who can make you whole
I cannot save you
I can't even save myself
so just save yourself
I know that you've been damaged
your soul has suffered such abuse
I am not your savior
I am just as fucked as you
I cannot save you.
I can't even save myself
so just save yourself
please don't take pity on me
my life has been a nightmare
my soul is fractured to the bone
so if I must be lonely
I think I'd rather be alone
you cannot save me
you can't even save yourself
I cannot save you.
I can't even save myself
save yourself
so just save yourself



Haunting Me

everywhere I go I see your face
and every sound I hear
is the sound of your voice
why are you haunting me
why can't I let you go
why are you haunting me
so everything about me is a lie
at least it seems that way
when I look in your eyes
the truth scares the shit out of me
who ever said love is blood and love is real
has never felt the way that I feel
what does it matter
what's done is done
and I should get on with my life
why are you haunting me
well I don't know what it is
but I can't seem to make myself forget
was it something that you said
or is it all the guilt inside my head
why are you haunting me



Torn Apart

I know I should have told you
but I was so afraid you'd leave
and now there's nothing left to say
well, nothing you'd believe
I never meant to hurt you
with the things I couldn't say
I promised you tomorrow
while denying you today
these lies have torn my world apart
a darkness grows inside me
in fading shades of gray
all the colors of the world
are slowly sucked away
I'm sinking ever deeper
to a place that's cold and black
I can't believe I've lost you
and you're never coming back
these lies have torn my world apart
soon the night will take me
and save me from my pain
cloak me in cold darkness
and help me lose your name
these lies have torn my world apart



Sometimes It Hurts

six o'clock in the morning
my head is ready to explode
I can't believe I made it home alive
I don't remember where I went or
what I was drinking
but I know itís made me sick
and I'm not denying that
I get this way
when I try to get over you
I get this way
when I try to get over you
sometimes it hurts so much
to lose the one you love
sometimes it hurts so much
to lose the one you love
I tried so hard to hate you
but it only makes things worse
I only end up hating myself
and as my hatred grows
so do the lies
it's hard to face the truth sometimes
god, I feel so useless
god, I hate myself
when I try to get over you
I hate myself
how will I ever get over you
sometimes it hurts so much
to lose the one you love
and after all this time you'd think
I'd understand the way you feel
but no.
I only think about myself
and itís driving you away
I always knew it would one day
sometimes it hurts so much
to lose the one you love



Drowning

I'm drowning in nothing
nothing real
nothing left
nothing
Iím losing myself
sinking
deeper down
silently
leaving
this behind
nothing left but me
I'm hating myself
hating
everyone hates
me now
everything has changed
everyone has changed
but me
everyone has changed



Desperate Now

I keep breaking all the promises
that I keep making to myself
you'd think, by now that I'd be over this
instead I'm feeling sorry for myself
so why does everything seem so desperate now
I should be feeling so alive
but it feels like something's missing
something's wrong somehow
it feels like something deep inside has died
so why do I feel desperate now
why do I feel like dying
why do I feel desperate now
why do I feel desperate now
I keep breaking all the promises
that I keep making to myself
but the promises mean nothing to me anymore
circling the drain
spiraling to hell
so why do I feel desperate now
why do I feel like dying
why do I feel desperate now
why do I feel desperate now



Goodbye

so this is where I say goodbye
this is where my story ends
and if there's one thing I've learned from life
it's that it gets you in the end
so goodbye my friend
goodbye
so goodbye my friend
goodbye



When I'm Dead

I know the tears youíre crying in your bed at night alone
I've cried those tears a thousand times
but those shallow empty songs about suicide are patronizing
you've got to learn to face your fears
or do you think Iíll be less lonely when I'm dead
it canít silence all the voices in my head
I close my eyes but I can't make it go away
do you think Iíll be less lonely
god I pray that I'm less lonely
when I'm dead
when I'm dead
when I'm dead I won't feel any pain
'cause when I'm dead I won't feel anything
when I'm dead
I know the songs your singing
saying nothing loud and clear
I've heard that song a thousand times
but your noble empty lies about suicide are patronizing
you can never understand what I feel
or do you think I'll be less lonely
when I'm dead
it canít silence the voices in my head
I close my eyes but I can't make it go away
do you think I'll be less lonely
god I pray that Iím less lonely
when I'm dead
when I'm dead



The Thing I Hate (P.O.M.F)

lost in a world of doubt and insecurity
nothing that you hold sacred nothing you believe
your life is a contradiction
while you thrive on manipulation
I fight to just hold on to what I believe
I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become you
youíve treated me like I'm a worthless piece of shit
you think like you're in control but you make me sick
I want to watch you suffer
the way that youíve made me suffer
I want to fuck up everything you've ever loved
but I won't become the thing I hate
I won't become you



On Your Way Down

I hope I see you on your way down
I hope you break every bone
I hope it kills you on your way down
and I hope you die alone
all of your hate and all of your lies
will it be worth it
when all of your friends refuse to be alibis
will it be worth it
I'll see you on your way down
it's kinda sad to watch you break down
you greedy fuck you pissed it all away
so who will catch you on your way down
you've only got yourself to blame
when all your worst fears materialize
will it be worth it
there's nobody left who cares you're alive
was it worth it
I'll see you on your way down



Waking Up Beside You

I've been so alone for so long
forgotten by the world
forgotten to myself
your effervescent eyes have awakened me
and brushed the dust away
but I knew you'd never stay
so I memorized the color of your eyes
as I lost myself inside you
I memorized the way our legs entwined
as I drifted off beside you
I miss...
god I miss
waking up beside you.
at night I cling to you
I'm so afraid...
afraid the day will come
and I'll wake up and find you gone
but you promised that you'd not abandon me
and kissed my fears away
but I woke up to that day
but I had memorized the way our eyes would meet
reflected in the bathroom mirror
and I memorized your naked silhouette
as you slowly brushed your hair
I miss...
god I miss
waking up beside you
I've been so alone for so long
I forgot how much it hurts
to wake up so alone
but Iíd memorized how warm your body felt
as you lay half asleep beside me
and I memorized the way the sunlight filled the room
and played upon your body
I miss...
god I miss
waking up beside you