TULIP
Cult of Calvinism
T U L I P

Spiritually approved insanity in action.

An overview of the big picture of Calvinism in layman's terms.

Calvinism a.k.a. "Reformed doctrine" is perhaps one of the most ridiculous cult systems in Christian circles today right up there with belief systems like Utah Mormonism and the Watchtower of Brooklyn. What a bunch of nuts. Many of their ideas surpass the foolishness of the Watchtower by a country mile. The genius of Calvinism is its own insanity. Of course, just like the JW, every Calvinist is absolutely sure that his beliefs are completely Biblical and anyone who rejects his belief system either hasn't done their Biblical homework and seen the truth of the matter, or, such a person is simply not able to accept this truth because he is not one of the elect who is born again and therefore cannot comprehend the spiritual truth of Calvinism. And of course, Calvinists consider any gospel which teaches anything contrary to their gospel to be a false gospel. They of course teach "the doctrine of grace." Calvinists also avoid reflecting upon the idea that such mindsets as these are the mark of many cult belief systems. Yet, it is fashionable in Christendom to accept just about any foolish group as long as they pass the Christian litmus test - belief in the Trinity - and this approval doesn't help Calvinists to realize they just might be totally dwelling in never, never land. And so Calvinists frolic in the land of Christendom completely unbridled spreading their madness with sanctioned glee.

Calvinism is often called "five point Calvinism" after the five letters of their favorite flower, TULIP. T stands for Total Depravity, the belief that God has to make people born again Christians first so that they can believe the truth. U stands for Unconditional Election, the belief that God chose certain people before creation to become Christians and that decision to choose them had nothing to do with their future behavior. L stands for Limited Atonement which means Jesus only died for those particular individuals God had elected before creation and his death will never be effective to anyone but them. I stands for Irresistable Grace which means that when God calls people to be born again there is nothing they can do about it but comply. And P stands for Perseverance of the saints which means God made sure that he will make sure that his chosen born again saints will stay Christians until they are dead. The word "Sovereignty" is also a key term and this means that if somebody doesn't accept God's gift of grace then God is a weakling God who can't make people do what he would like them to do. Which brings us to another special term "grace" which means God drags people to the gift of grace he has for them and if he didn't grace wouldn't be grace but we would have worked for this gift even if we responded to God's gift of grace by accepting it in faith. And of course "regeneration" means that God makes you able to be moved to being congenial to doing God's will. More importantly, it means you will be able to adopt Calvinism.

John Calvin taught that you can't really know the identity of the elect because only God knows the heart. I am not sure why he would need to know their hearts since he already knew which ones he elected but we will leave that particular idiocy for another time. The reason for this uncertainty among the divinely illuminated elect, who know the deep heavenly truths of Calvinism but can't figure this one out, is that if you thought somebody was elect and then they fell away into grave sin like murder and rape and debauchery for many, many years and then died in the commission of a grave sin then you pretty much have to admit that he was never a Christian in the first place since Christians cannot fall away. Never mind that Jesus taught that you can know them by their fruits. Calvinism prevails over Jesus' teaching. Or maybe you just have to wait til they are dead to decide if you knew them by their fruits. Yeah, that's it. But wait. What if you died first? Would that mean you would never know? Oh no, now that I think about it how would we ever hire a pastor? What if he isn't one of the elect?!

Calvinist mindsets vary widely and they perceive themselves in a variety of ways. Many of them humbly acknowledge the well-known fact that they are academically the finest theological geniuses Christendom has ever enjoyed. Just ask them. One good thing about the grace of Calvinism is that you don't have to be an elect Calvinist to spiritually discern that particular spiritual truth. Indeed, the Calvinist is way, way smarter than Augustine who was a genius for that one day there when for some strange reason he had some Calvinistic thoughts but unfortunately he also had some terrible, terrible, very, very bad, unfortunate, heinous, blasphemous, works-righteousness false gospel, heretical beliefs concerning baptismal regeneration and unsavory Catholic stuff like that which shows he clearly wasn't anywhere as smart as R.C. Sproul who likes reading Thomas Aquinas when Thomas is right. John Wesley was a real dummy too although he had a few things over Augustine, mostly Catholic related, and Jacob Arminius and Pelagius were downright evil. Luther was not all that bad but he wasn't quite as insightful as John Calvin, especially concerning sacraments. All Calvinists know these absolute truths too. The less learned Calvinist allows his own sense of discovery to conclude that Calvinists must have discovered some predestination stuff in the deep recesses of the Bible that only Calvinists have ever found in that really big book. The intermediate Calvinist knows a bit more and tends to think that if this predestination stuff is not just unknown by others because elect Calvinists haven't told them about it yet, then they must simply deny it because they don't want to believe it because they don't like it. And others yet, the mature Calvinists, know all this and more, knowing for certain that the main reason only Calvinists accept Calvinism is because 1 Corinthians 2:13-14 explains that only the elect can discern the spiritual truths of Calvinism and of course this is a correct interpretation of that particular verse because Calvinists are elect and they can spiritually discern this true interpretation which no one else can. These Calvinists are the elite of the elite elect elite and are also indeed the finest theological geniuses in Christendom which they spiritual discern. These are the ones who have totally captured and embraced the spirit of denial by denying they are in denial and being assured everyone else is in denial, totally comprehending how to nullify Scriptures with their genius philosophy and not even realize they are deliberately doing it, and how to use the words "tension," "you misunderstand Calvinism" (meaning, "you don't know how to think about these crazy ideas in a way pleasing to the mind"), "that's not what I personally believe," "in another sense," "not at all" and "paradox" when those troublesome "apparent" contradictions arise.

Calvinists know it is their divine duty to commission their label makers into active service. They love making "Armenian," "Pelagian," "False Gospel," "Heretic" and "Dispensationalist" labels for themselves to stick on people who say things they don't want to entertain because TULIP gets very, very disgruntled and perturbed with non-Calvinist ideas, especially if they sound right. It's a load of fun playing pin the label on the heretic. These labels are really all you need since any of them will suit any belief system that is not Calvinism. It doesn't matter if a person ascribes to Arminianism or Pelagianism; if he disagrees with Calvinism then he is one and you have to stick that label on them. It is also absolutely true that the only viable argument against Calvinism is Pelagian Arminianism because that is the straw man Calvinists have the most comfort debating. These are the only two options of course. All these labels are for ideas that are not Calvinism and fit into the "very bad things" category because Calvinists say so, or more specifically, because TULIP has told them this is so and of course this is spiritually discerned by those who are the only ones who can spiritually discern these things, the elect, who are Calvinists. They encourage each other that if they they stick these labels on people who disagree with them that this clearly validates their belief system. In other words, they know that approval among men is the way to go and they know they are right because they renmind each other they are right because they are the elect who can spiritually discern these right things because they are Calvinists who know they are the elect who are able to discern they are right to be Calvinists because they are the elect who are able to discern these spiritual truths concerning Calvinism. The firm establishment of this mutual admiration and reaffirmation society ensures Calvinism is definitely right and this is an undeniable spiritual truth which of course is only discernable by Calvinists. Why they then bother to debate anyone is a mystery only God knows. Mind you, it is a good fleshly way to justify yourself and be justified by faith in the things you believe which you have spiritual discerned and convincing yourself to be true.

Another great part of Calvinism is the great fun they have together defining Biblical words to suit their belief system. It is truly a very entertaining ball of fun. You have to make sure that Biblical words which do not sound good to Calvinism are defined to make sure they fit Calvinism. The word "will" can mean whatever you like it to mean as long it waters TULIP. The word "world" sometimes means the domain of the devil as you like and at other times such as John 1:20 and John 3:16 it obviously means "the elect" or "the world of the elect" because TULIP deems it to be necessary. This is how to define any Biblical word; it has to be defined so that the idea it expresses in context agrees with TULIP and if it does then that's what it is intended to mean. Never mind looking at the context to see what was intended or doing any exploration of how the author normally uses the word. That won't tell you anything signficant. Eisegetical TULIP interpretation under the banner "Analogy of Faith" is the true and spiritually discerned way. It is also good when you are a Calvinist to be completely ignorant of the dangers of falling prey to distorted perceptions based on a person's preconceptions that he brings to reading the Scriptures. In other words, don't worry about this at all. The first thing that jumps into your head when you read the Bible is what the Bible intends to say, unless of course it conflicts with Calvinism and then you can be absolutely certain that it can't be right, and you must not be listening to the Spirit which helps you spiritually discern the truth of Calvinism. You must always make sure the Holy Spirit reveals these spiritual truths to you when you read your Bible. The way to do this is to just put on your TULIP colored glasses before you read your Bible and to forget to do this is a grave sin of disobeying God's will which is spiritually discerned by the spiritual man. So lay that grid over the Bible before you read it and that way you will ensure that the first thing that jumps into your head when you read your Bible is a Calvinistic idea and you will then know there is absolutely no other way to comprehend Romans 8:28-39, or Romans 9, or Ephesians 1:4, or Acts 13:48 than what Calvinists see through these TULIP colored glasses commonly known as "the Holy Spirit" who prefers to use this method of interpretation as the definition of "the analogy of faith." In other words, "the analogy of faith" does not necessarily mean you make sure all the pieces fit together as intended by the authors but means you have to stick the pieces of the Bible together however it suits TULIP, like putting pieces of a jigsaw puzzle together however makes you happy without regard to what was intended. If a Bible verse presents a picture that is not a TULIP, then you need to look for pieces that will make it so even if it is a bit "fuzzy." Also, if you do this properly you will also notice, for example, that the words "in him" at Ephesians 1:4 and "in Christ Jesus" at Romans 8:39 are completely redundant and don't even need to be there and it is good practice to read those passages as if those words are not there at all since they were uselessly inspired by God and they don't add anything to the intended meaning. Give it a try and you will see exactly how it works. The Holy Spirit must have been a bit drunk with himself there. It is also good to get Calvinistic ideas into the heads of new converts before they read these passages to make sure they have such preconceived notions and make sure they arrive at this spiritually discerned interpretation. Otherwise, they might inadvertently perceive what these passages really intend to say and that could be very troublesome. A wise Calvinist also knows better than to be foolish enough to interpret the Bible and then conform his beliefs to it. It is essential to Calvinism that the words of the Bible are interpreted to conform to the Calvinistic belief system and not the other way around. This is very important. Indeed, this is the most important principle in Calvinism. If you do all this you are on your way to being a good Calvinist, knowing you are elect, and being assured of your salvation and someday you too might become a theological genie.

Calvinism is also steeped in their unique brand of human philosophy, if it be proper to even call it that, and to be a good one you have to know how to play this game of smoke and mirrors too. You pretty much can't discuss Calvinism without getting into some kind of philosophy about their own concepts of free will, foreknowledge, and the like. Philosophic babble is quite handy when you want to weave a tangle web. The chief uses of it are to promote Calvinism, nullify Scripture, and deny the facts, in a very complex way so that most will not notice what you are really up to, including yourself. Of course, Calvinists don't commit logical fallacies but everyone else does. They don't practice eisegesis but everyone else does. They have pondered the ramifications of God's foreknowledge and what all that must mean and everyone else has failed to do so. And most of all, they have perfected the high philosophical art of self deception by laying awake for hours in bed at night and dreaming up confused interpretive contrivances to avoid the implications to Bible passages which they don't like very much. And of course, the fact that Paul sternly warns people not to get into the tangled web of human philosophy does not concern the Calvinist. His philosophy is a "spiritual" philosophy that is spiritually discerned by the elect, that is, them. It does not even occur to these theological geniuses that Paul makes it abundantly clear that the spiritual wisdom he has in mind in his first letter to the Corinthians is not a set of theological concepts about God but knowing the person Jesus Christ relationally, our wisdom from God and the way, truth, and life. But this is not important.

Calvinism is based chiefly on two premises. First, they know for certain that before the creation of the world, God in his wise secret counsel, determined which human beings would become Christians and be eternally saved by relocating them to heaven when they die. No, I am not sure who God was keeping his secrets from at that time. Secondly, since all humans are totally depraved, which means they cannot choose to become a Christian, including the yet uncalled and unsaved elect, and so this pre-creation election is precisely what God knew he had to do to save some of the people he was about to create. In the Calvinist mind, the Biblical words "elect" or "chosen" refer to those people God elected to be saved. A good way to check who might possibly maybe perhaps be elect is to see if a person is a Calvinist but be careful cause it's real tricky.

The favorite words of Calvinism are "predestination," "election," "sovereignty," "grace," and "regeneration." The Calvinist believes God predestined those He elected before creation to become Christians by regenerating them at an appointed time and place and God has to do this because man is in bondage to his own will and cannot choose to do God's will. If God did not do this unilaterally the Calvinist thinks grace would not be grace because of his naive interpretations of Romans 9, never once realizing that a gift is something one chooses to receive or deny and our cooperative acceptance of a gift does not nullify grace. In fact, the Calvinist is sure that if God did not control the salvation of his elect, he would be a pathetic little pansey mommy's boy weakling and not be a powerful Sovereign God at all. Never mind thinking about the fact that these born again chosen people continue to sin and disobey God and the fact that this happens doesn't mean that God is not in control and isn't Sovereign. But if someone chooses to disobey God and not accept his gift of grace then it most certainly does mean God is not in control and not Sovereign. Remember that.

In Calvinism, God's Sovereignty is not measured by his power that he may or may not choose to weild, but by his exacting active control over people when it comes to their new birth salvation events. In other words, God cannot allow men to resist his will at any time or he would perceive himself to be powerless. Just forget about the fact that the elect disobey God and sin after they are born again and this does not make him a powerless Sovereign for some mysterious reason. This is a "paradox" and that can be explored after you become a committed Calvinist. Just let it go. Let it go. Breath in and let it go and let your mind be filled with TULIPS from heaven.

Calvinists do not realize that allowing men to do as they will, and that God still has the power to bring all things to the good even when they do so, is a mark of true Sovereign power. Sovereignty is not thwarted by disobedience to a powerful ruler's will. A Father's sovereignty over his household is not based on how well he controls his wife and children. In fact, it is not even measure of the power, ability, he might employ to change all bad things they might do toward the good in the end. It is a measure of the extent of one's authority, not ability. And even so, God has the ability, the power, to turn all things to the good and so does not need to control anything to be Sovereign. Calvinists are too naive to realize their concept of God's Sovereignty actually makes Him out to be a weakling who would have created in the fear that if he did not control everything by ordaining it to happen, and ensuring it thereafter happens ,then he would be powerless and thus not be Sovereign. A truly Sovereign God does not worry about what happens because he not only knows he has the power to work anything that happens toward perfection but that the extent of his authority is not measured by anyone's disobedience. Of course the Calvinist God does not worry either. He is in complete control because he is a control freak and does not even need to consider what his present power can do because everything that happens is already ordained to happen because he exacted that control when he created to make sure he was Sovereign. Calvinists simply do not even remotely comprehend that such control is the tyranny of bondage rooted in weakness and fear and masquerading as power. What is worse is that they do not realize and cannot comprehend that without free will devoid of external control that real love is not even possible. They don't have the first clue when it comes to these things. But that is their God; the God who has to control to be Sovereign and to them this masquerade is called "power."

Calvinists believe that everything happens is ordained by God and this is also how God is Sovereign. This is clearly stated in their Westminster Confession. After all, they miserably conclude, if something happens outside of God's will he would not be Sovereign would he? Nothing ever happens that God did not will to happen. The fall of Adam was willed by God when he willfully ordained all things but this is entirely Adam's fault even though God created a world in which it could not happen any other way and it was ordained by God for Adam to fall. Every perverted act man has ever committed was God's will since he ordained it to happen by his will, well one of his wills, when he created a world in which he foreknew this would occur. Put another way, God knew it was going to happen and he created this reality knowing it would happen so it is his will that it should happen because he willfully created a world where he knew for certain it would happen and it is in this way he ordained it to happen. Yet, it is not God's fault perverted things happen even though he was the one who made this creation where he knew it would happen when he created it and thus ordained it would happen. So even though it was ordained for Jack the Ripper to savagely butcher several women, and of course he had to do it because God ordained it and decided to create a reality that could not be any other way, this is not God's fault but Jack the Ripper's fault, and boy oh boy is he gonna pay dearly for that mistake which God ordained him to commit.

Now there is a special way to think about this and only Calvinists really know how to do perform this particular act of insanity because they are able to discern these spiritual things. What you have to do is this. You have to allow part of your mind to fog up so you can't see the insanity of the idea in your own mind very well and then let the other part of your mind that likes Calvinism to think clearly like a delightful happy and gleeful clear summer day frolicking through the TULIPS. On one hand you have to kinda pretend God wound up the world when he created it and then sort of just let things go so that God was not thereafter actively participating with man in any acts of sin and hence when man sinned it was all his fault he is going to hell and God was all upset because a man had screwed up his perfectly good utopia he had already made and was simply enjoying up to that point in time. Never mind about God being in Sovereign control of everything here because we aren't talking about that right now and it will screw everything up if we think about it. Okay, now let that fog roll in and cloud up your knowledge that God had ordained this to happen so God got himself into this predicament. Just take a deep breath and forget about it. Okay, now you are ready to remind yourself of the Westminster confession that says God ordained everything that will ever happen and we have to say this because God has foreknowledge of everthing that happens because he indeed foreordained it to happen and that's how he foreknew it would all happen and didn't forget about it. Now, think this in your mind in kind of a foggy confused way where necessary but a clear distinct way where necessary but do not say it aloud when anyone is listening: When God set creation in motion he decided he would later participate in the good things that will happen when they happen which he previously ordained to happen so he could later take credit for it, but all the bad things that happen he will not participate with those things when they happen but just let those things sorta happen by themselves just as he ordained it beforehand to happen and then he can say these bad acts were not his fault because man participated in them alone as God had ordained him to do. So, what God ordained before creation to happen involves both good and evil, although God really didn't like the fact that evil was ordained when he ordained it, but when it comes time for the good things to happen God will jump in and get involved at that time to righteously take credit for it, but he will avoid getting involved with participating in any of the bad things that he willingly preordained men to do and then it won't be his fault because he did not get involved with those events when they were happening and so he can't take credit or be accused for those bad things he had foreordained to happen when they happened because he did not actively do it although he ordained men to do it. Get it? Work on bringing that mental fog a bit more into the right places and it will become clear to you.

Of course the will to save and not save is only one of God's wills. Although God did not choose to save some people with one of his wills he is rather disappointed about it with his other one. God's wills are in conflict due to a particular psychosis entailing a need to control which he passed on to John Calvin, blessed be his name, so that Johnny could explain to the elect how and what the ever wise God was contemplating in secret before creation, in apparent paranoia that someone else might exist, and how he kinda regrets, in one "sense," some of his previous Sovereign decisions he made then with his other will. This is quite a paradox and there is quite a tension between these two wills and this apparent contradiction. On one hand, God does not will that anyone should suffer the infinitely painful endless torments of hell. On the other hand, this is God's will since he preordained this destiny before creation. In Calvinism, God is schizophrenic and his two wills are at odds with each other. It's kinda like saying that God really doesn't want to torment all these people for eternity because it makes him really, really, REALLY sad this is gonna happen, but gosh darn it he is so holy and righteous he just has to do it, and not only that, he already decided with his other will they must burn because he didn't pick them and he can't go back on his word, even though these people had absolutely no opportunity to behave any other way than to deserve the torture of endless fires of pain. God does not feel real good about this and doesn't will it to happen with his one will but it has to happen according to his other will, which seems to be his dominant personality. The sad God personality seems to be the submissive one. Perhaps this can be explained by the three persons of the Trinity. I would expect that maybe the Father is the mean one and maybe Jesus is the nice one which might explain why the Father did not rescue Jesus and Jesus had a sort of self absusive sadist personality. Maybe that's it. Of course, Calvinists do not use the words "psychosis" and "schizophrenic" because that most certainly would be an explicity confession of their beliefs about God but they make sure to remind us that God has these two wills which are at odds with each other. How do you define schizophrenic?

Put another way, Calvinists find God's ways confusing and hard to understand so why wouldn't he find it this way himself?! After all, he did say that his thoughts were higher than our thoughts. It must be his two personalities that make this possible. Never mind that Isaiah said that under the Law and only now God's mysteries are revealed, that is, Calvinism. Unfortunately, the Galatians and the Hebrews were not on to this Calvinism stuff yet so Paul could dupe them by scaring them to behave like Christians. After all, if they had been Calvinists they would have know that these dire warnings of not being saved if they continue their ways cannot possibly be true since God ensures the elect persevere. One of the ways he does that is to get guys like Paul to scare the less informed into action. It's a bit tougher when they are fully aware of the P petal.

God also controls himself and has foreknowledge of himself. Since God ordained that someone would be born again on a certain day God has to make sure he shows up on that day to make sure it happens according to plan and he zaps those people born again at that time. In fact, he has to be there to regenerate these people because he previously ordained he would be there and so he can't get out of it now. His decisions are irrevocable and he knew he would be there before he got there because he has this foreknowledge. This is also true of course of all God's worldly interventions but not all worldly events because God does not participate in the bad stuff men do, if you recall from earlier - except he does tend to cause hurricanes and tornadoes and perhaps rotten Irish potatoes. Make sure you understand that this is really what Isaiah meant when he said God created evil by the way. As we have clearly and decisively shown before, God is not involved contemporaneously with bad events, just the good ones. So for example, when it comes time to save one of his elect, he must be there since he had already preordained himself to call them to that salvation and in this way he knew he would be there before he got there, according to his will, one of them. And one of God's more important duties is to make sure his elect persevere and are preserved until their deaths. Of course this must happen anyway because God had already ordained it to happen and so that means the elect will not persevere because God will be there to make sure they persevere but because he previously ordained that he would be there to make sure they persevere. Simple. Of course, God can do this because he has "foreknowledge" of the future and has the power to make sure he gets to where he wants to go when he needs to be somewhere which he foreordained. Obvious. And of course he has also the foreknowledge of the future since he designed everything in it and ordained it to be that way and he is not very forgetful about the things he previously ordained to happen in which he will be involved which is why he knows what is going to happen. So God makes sure he fulfills what he ordained for himself to do in his wise counsel of his dominant will personality and indeed it has to happen because he ordained himself to do it. So God controlled himself by previously ordaining himself to be where he is when something must occur and there is nothing he can do about it or he might not be Sovereign. In other words, he does not really need to make sure he shows up at a worldly interventions at all since he does not have the free will to make sure he is there since he ordained he would be there and there is nothing he can do to change his Sovereign will. Elementary.

In Calvinism, any person's eternal destiny is not determined at a person's new birth salvation event. No, no, no, don't be so silly. It is not determined at his death at a particular judgment either. Don't be so ridiculous. It is not determined by a person's response of faith. No, no, don't be so idiotic. It is not even determined on judgment day when God judges every living soul and then sends them away to eternal life or eternal damnation. How absurdly laughable. No, no, no. A person's eternal destiny was determined by God before that person even existed and before the world was even created. People who go to heaven are going there because God picked them before the creation of the world to go there and that's the end of it. Why is anyone going to heaven? Cuz, God picked them to go to heaven. Technically, a person was saved before he existed and before the world was created because that is when God determined his final destiny although he just won't realize it until the time appointed for him to be born again and then God tells him when he makes sure he is there to call that person to salvation as he previously had ordained himself to do. After that, he knows he is going to heaven for certain no matter what he does between that point in time and his death. The yet unsaved elect sinner was never ever, ever on his way to hell so why Jonathan Edwards used this technique to scare people into accepting Christ does seem a bit deceptive on his part. On the other hand, maybe he was just a moron who didn't realize what he was doing. This pre-creation determination is also true of those who will be damned, that is, their destiny was determined before creation too although these people won't realize what is going to happen to them until a few seconds before God commands his most holy angels to toss these nasty individuals into the tortuous tumultuary of extreme eternal torment. Calvinists call these people, "the reprobate," and they deserve everything they get. God knew these people would exist, and since he didn't pick them they were destined to go to hell and they deserve it too. And of course God would know that since he intended to create them and ordained all that would be, so he also knew that all men after the fall of Adam would be born into the fallen condition of sin, so according to some Calvinists, he chose to "pass over" these people for salvation and created the world and these people knowing full well he would eventually send them to hell because he ordained everything that would come to pass including sending them to hell on judgment day because they deserve to be damned for commiting the sins God had ordained to happen that he had nothing to do with. This view is generally adopted by Calvinists who don't like hearing the idea that God would choose people for eternal torment in hell and so they like to pretend that neglecting to choose these people for salvation was not a decision to choose them for hell. Other Calvinists recognize that the act of rejecting these individuals for salvation is a implicit choice to actively choose them for hell and this is called "double predestination." On judgment day the reprobate will discover they are technically going to hell not because they were bad people and had sinned, since after all the elect did that too, but because they were never elected before creation to be saved and nothing could be done about their destiny once that was decided. Poor fellas. If they too had only been elected by God before creation, Jesus would have died for them too.

In Calvinism, judgment day is not about God determining who will enter heaven and who will enter hell. He already determined that before he created anything and before anyone existed. Calvinists know they are "in" long before judgment day. Just ask them. Unfortunately the reprobate doesn't know what is going to happen to him but he is gonna find out by golly. No, what judgment day is about in Calvinism is to determine how many rewards the elect will get in heaven and how much pain the reprobate will suffer in the pit of hell. Boy, I tell ya, then the elect will be in their glory. Yeah, that'll show 'em. hehehe.

Of course, this brings up the question as to what we are doing here. Since God has already determined everything that will ever occur, why are we here anyway? What is the point of our existence? Well, we have to be as theologically smart as Calvinists to answer this one. God does all these things and they will be done as part of God's good pleasure and will, to save his elect, and to ensure the reprobate he created are tormented forever, and the reason he does this is to display his stupendous glory and holiness. In other words, he had to make some other beings so that he could proudly show them what a great and powerful guy he is. If you can't explain this without sounding good it is wise to just use the old Calvinist standby to explain what we humans are doing here. It's a mystery only God can fathom and we don't have the first clue what we are doing here because God never told us.

Calvinists wouldn't put it this way of course because it does not please itching ears. But these are the facts Jack. So..... ready to join up?

There are intelligent and very understandable answers available to the things Calvinists cannot understand concerning election, predestination and God's foreknowledge which are in complete harmony with the Bible. The Arminian response is certainly not the right answer to these questions either. But at least they have been intelligent enough not to stoop to the utter stupidity of Calvinism.