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Dar avasete tabestan ghadam be khake pake mihanam, iran, nahadam. Dar khanevadeii motavaset zendegiam ra shooroo kardam. Pedar o madaram famil boodand va har do khanevadehaii por jamiat dashtand. Dokhtary 3 sale boodam ke baradaram niz ghadam be zandegiam gozasht. Ba inke dokhtar boodam vali sheytanathaiam mara az hich pesar kamtar nemikard. Pesaran ra hambazian khod midanestam va mashino tofang ra asbab-bazihaye khood mishenakhtam. Dar 4 salegy azeme Italia shodim. Mano dadasho mamano babam. Pedaram dar Italia maamoriati be modate 2 sal gerefte bood va ma niz oo ra hamrahi kardym. Hanooz senam dar hady nabood ke tame ghorbat ra betavanam bechesham. Iran o kharej barayam be yek mana boodand. Ba afzayesh be senam tajrobehaii ziad kasb kardam. Baad az haft sal zendegi dar esfehan bary digar majboor be taghire makan shodim va in bar dar Tehran saken gardidim. Ba shoorooe madares man gami digar be soote marhaleii jaded az zendegiam bar midashtam. Doostani samimi peyda kardam va har che bozorgtar mishodam o ba ejtema ashnatar, akhlagham avaz mishod. Tabdil be adami khejalaty va aram shode boodam. Tooye in modat ke sakene Tehran boodim ba yek dokhtar dar madreseam ashna shodam. Dokhtary ke tabdil be behtarin doostam shod. Oo dokhtary bood az akhnevadeii servatmand, servatman vali khaki. Ma har do daraye yeki khoosoosiat boodim . Har doo be heyvanat eshgh mivarzidim. Oo tedady zid gorbe dashtva man asheghe bazi ba oonha boodam. Rooz be rooz doostie mano Mahtab mohkamtaro samimitar mishod. Oo ra mesle khahar doost midashtam. Be dalile ekhtelafe sathe darsy, man o Mahtab majboor be joda kardane madresehaye khood az ham shodim. Be elate voorood be maghtae rahnamaii man dar yek madrese namoone mardomi ghabool shodam va Mahtab majboor shod be madreseye gheire entefahi beravad. In vaghe-e avalin tarak ra trooye doostie ma be voojood avard. Do sal doosty va hala jodaii baraye har doye ma sakht bood. Man dar madreseye jaded doostani jaded peyda kardam. Mahtab hamchenin doostani jaded peyda karde bood. Zaheran barayash khoshhal boodma vali tahe del oo ra faghat baraye khood mikhastam. Rooz be rooz shahede motelashi shodane doosty boodam ke payeash dar modate 3 sal shekl gerefte bood. Man ghafle az daste taghdir inchenin delam be hale khoodam misookht va narahate az dast dadane doostam boodma bi anke oo ra az dast bedam, cheshmam ra bastam va posht be ayande kardam. Ayandeii ke shayad rooshan vali na chandan khoosh ayand bood.

Roozha separy mishod. Bahse jadidi dar khaneye ma dar hale shekl gereftan bood. Bahsy ke avayel jaleb bood. Modaty nagozasht ke vizaye ma resid va na chandy baad man shahede ashkhaye khodafezy boodam. Albate in ashkha motealegh be man naboodnad choon man khooshhal boodam.

Mahtab rooze akhar ashke khodafezy ra sar dad amma man ghadfel az anche dar entezaram bood khooshhal va bi ehssa khodafezie por mehro ghame anhara ba labkhandy maghroorane javab midadam. Labkhandy ke giooi abre siahi ra rooy saram tashkil dad. Hanoozam cheshmhaye por az ashke Mahtab ra be yad daram. Geryeye famil ke tooye fooroodgah doore ma halghe zade boodand. Hameo hameroo moo be moo be yad daram. Oon lahzehaii bood ke hanooz cheshmo gooshy baste dashtam. Zamani ke hanooz pardeye vagheiiyat bar dashte nashod bood va man hamchenan khooshhal az tarke mihano doostnao famil, maghroorane labkhand be lab dashtam. In eshgh be kharej bood ke mara hasrat be del raha kard. --- hasrate sookoonat dar khake mihanam bary digeh�

Avalin bar nabood ke az Iran kharej mishodim vali in bar be jaye khoorooje movaghaty be Italia, ma baraye zendegie hamihsegy dar Canada Iran ra tark mikardym. Vrood be sarzamimi nashenas va be manaye shooroo az sefr.

Voroody dashtym mamooli amma baraye man be manaye digary bood. Ahsas mikardam kharej chizi be man khahad dad ke Iran hargez tavanaii oan ra nadare� shayad Canada ayanei rooshan baraye man taamin mikard, ammma hargez nemytavanest jaye doostano famil ra por konad. Har gez booye khakash baraye man booye ashenaii nemidad, booye ghorbat midad. Dar mahali ke khane gereftim Iranihaye faravani dasht amma ba in hame sale aval ziad khosh ayand nabood. Ba nadanestane zaban ehsase gharantine boodan ra mikardam. Va natavanestane bayadne ehsasate khood, man ra be shedat miranjand. Doostane ziady peyda kardam va pas az gozashte modaty vatan ra be daste khaterat sepordam. Doost dashtam ba zendegie jaded okht begyram va be ghole maaroof sarmaye Canada kam kam dasht delam ra yakh mikard. Sale aval separy shod. Varede sevome rahnamaii mishodam ke kheily az doostane madreseiim tasmim be jabejaii madrese ya hata mahale zendegie khood kardand. In moozoo ziad be didam khoshayand nayamad. Ba yeki az dokhtarane madres rabeteii samimane bar gharar karde boodan va dar sevome rahnamaii be Bita nazdiktar shodam. Doosty samimaneii beine ma shekl gerft. Dar in do sal akhlaghy sar peyda karde boodam va bitafavotiam nesbat be tedady az doostanam baese moshkelaty shode bood va shayad behtar ast begooyam man baese shodma rabete yeki az doostanam do bar ba do nafar be ham bokhore. Albate in doost yeki az ghadimitarin doostanam va shayad monasebtar bashad begooyam avalin doostam dar Canada bood. Hesadat va khoodkhahihaye man baese in do be ham zaniha shode bood va man bitafavot az anha migozashtam. Sale dovom ham gozasht va man doostano doshmanani jaded peyda kardam. Dar in modat az pesary be name Mr.X khoosham miamad. Avalin eshgham dar sene boloogh bood. Ba ghadam gozashtan be dabirestan masire zendegie mano oon az ham joda shod va man digar oo ra nadidam. Sonia dokhtary bood ke man oo ra dar sevome rahnamaii molaghat karde boodam va oo yeki az hamkelassihaye man bood. Baad az harkate jasooraneye man, mano Sonia do ta doshmane khoonine ham shodim. Oo az man nefrat dasht va man oo ra motenaferane azyat mikardam. Dar in modat mitavan goft be joz telephone gah gahy man rabeteii digar be hich yek az doostan ya famil nadashtam. Hata namehaye mahiyane ham laghv shode bood va man az neveshtane name doory mikardam. Voorood be dabirestan eshgho shore nojavani ra dar man zende kard va be ghole maroof saro gooshe ma ra be jonbesh davat kard. Ba did aval be Mr.Y jaraghehaye eshgh daroonam ra por kard. Oo ra mididam, doost dashtam va bi saro seda miparstydam. Az inke nemytavanestam ehsase oo ra nesbat be khood bedanam zajr mikeshydam. Gahy be khod mifahmandam ke dokhtar bas kon. Akharash ke chi??? Oon rahe khodash ra migire o to rahe khoodat ra. Vali baz vaghty oo ramididam ehasase eshgh daroonam moj mizad.

Che ghadr esgh saro gooshe adamo mibande� che ghadr esgh adam ra az donya bikhabar negah midare va ceh ghadr esgh adam ra az khood bikhod mikone. Dar avale dabirestan ba dokhtary be name Tahmine ashena shodam. Dokhtare khoobi bood va hamishe aramo bi taraf. Vali hamishe chizi mara az nazdik shodan be in dokhtar ba zmidasht. Az hamoon avayel alagheye oo nesbat be dooste samimi Bita ra moshahede mikardam vali dahan baz nakardam ke mabada bary digar mozahemat ya ijade moshkel konam. Shahede kam shodane samimiate beine mano Bita boodma vali baza ham sookoot ra tarjih dadam va ayandera vbe daste sarnevesht sepordam. Rooz be vaghti ke bita ba man sar mikard jaygozine separy kardane vaght ba Tahmine mishod. Kam kam faghat sayeii kamrang az gozashteye mano Bita be jai mand. Rooz be rooz va hata deighe be deyghe doorio tanhaii ra bishtar o bishtar ehsas mikardam. Dar oon zaman solh ra ba Sonia bar gaharr karde boodam. Amma hamchenan tanhaii ra ba tamame voojood ehsas mikardam. Shayad ham tanhaii nabood balke hese hesadat voojoodam ra miazord� shayad in natijeye karhaye gozashte bood ke hala dashtam sezasho pas midadam� ~>Vaghean rast miganke har kary koni badan saret miad<~ �dar teye in chand modat Internet va chat ra behtarin doostane khood midanestam. Hamchenin ba pesary be name Shahab(ya Mr.Z) ashena shodam. Pesare khoob o ba mohabaty be nazar miresyd va dar Iran zendegy mikard.

Ba etmame madares ma tasmim be raftan be yek safar ra kardym. Mano manao dadasham azeme Iran shodim. Man ziad mayel be anjame in kar naboodam va tarjih midadam tabestanam ra dar Toronto be sar bebaram, amm� Tooli nakeshyd ke cheraghhaye Tehran be did amad va mishod fooroodgahe �Mehrabad� ra did. Khaiabanha, mashinha va khaneha va hata meydane azady. Ba didane Iran mesle inke garmie khasi voohjoodma ra begyre sarshar az ehsas shodam va too delam ghoogha shod. Ahh ke che ghadr Iran ra doost dashtam. Iran ra miparstydam va hamishe arezooe bazdidi digar mikardam vali ghorooram mane eteraf be haghighat bood. Hal ehsasate khood ra mifahmidam va digar az bazagasht nemitarsydam� vay ke che ghadr in boo ra mipasandidam� hata booye doodesho�

Ba didane soorathaye ashena dar fooroodha ahsase ajibi be man dast dad. Bary digar maghroorane be negahhaye sarshar az mohabat javab dadam. Khoodma ra bartar az anha midadidam (che ghadr ahmaghane). Va ghoroor mesle sheytan mara tahrik mikard. Khaneye ghablieman khaterate gozashtera dar zehnam zende kard. Haman maghazeii ke har rooz zobh azash noon migereftim. Haman khiabani ke chaharshanbe sooriha divarhayash khal khal jaye siahe narenjakha ra be khood migereft. Haman kocheii ke gorbeha az daro divarash bala miraftan. Haman khiabani ke koodakiam ra dar an gozarande boodam. Khooshihao talkhiha ra ba oo moshtarak boodam. Khiabani ke bishtare zendegiam ra dar gozarande boodam va hal tamame khaterat bary digar dar zehnam zende shod ebood. Che ghadr oon lahze barayam shirin bood ke mesle bachehaye koochooloo to koochamoon midooiidamo zoogh mikardam. Bitaghat be didare doostam< Mahtab raftam. Ba didane oo sar az pa nemishnakhtam va oo ham daste kami a zman nadasht. Bichare bi khabar az hichi yehoo mano dame dare khoonashoon did. Oo ra ghargeh boose kardam. Az baghal kardanash khaste nemishodam va doost dashtam oon lahze tamame saathaye donya miistad va hargez be harkat nemioftad. Hanooz hich yeki az azaye familemoon ra nadide boodam zira anha dar shiraz zendegi mikardand. Rooze baad bary digar ba khodafezy az Mahtab azeme shiraz shodim. Hame dar anja montazer boodand va yek alame golaye khoshgel khoshgel baramoon ovorde boodand. Hame khoshal boodand. Man be elate kham khabie do shab ghabl cheshmani khab alood o ghiafeii vahshatnak va havasy part dashta. Salamo aleyk kardam vali chizi be yad nemiaram. Az anja be khaneye madar bozorgam raftym. Ba didane madar bozorg kheily khoshhal shodam. Vali chizi daroonam gereft bood. Negahy be doorobar govahy az tafavot midad. Az taghiro tahavol. Hame bozorg shode boodand. Bacheha bozorg, javanha ezdevaj karde va moteahel ha pir shode boodand. Kasi vaghte ezafi nadasht o hame ya dars ya kar ya zendegi vaghteshan ra gerefte bood. Hambazianam hala digar daneshjoo boodand va khood ra digar hambazie man nemidanestand. Hat tarze bayaneshoon taghir karde bood. Khaneye shoolooghe madarbozorg digar sedaye navehaye ghado nimghad ra nemidad va sookoot ra tarjih dade bood. Digar aroosakha be anbary taghire makan dade boodand va jaye anhara ketabo dars gerefte bood. Amma man hanooz haman boodam ke az anja rafte boodam. Haman dokhtare sheytano shooloogh. Be khoda man taghiri nakardam. Amma magar farghy dasht??? Nemishavad ke zaman ra biharkat kard. Taghir kardan jozvi az zendegani ast. Vali nemidanam chera mitarsydam ke nabasham ta shahede taghirat basham. Doost dashtam doorane shooro halo dar kenare anha be sar mibordam.

Iran niz baray avaz shode bood va shayad ham dide man nesbat be donya avaz shode bood. Digar ghanoon anghadar sakhtgyry nemikard. Pesarano dokhtaran khsohtip khoshgel shode boodand. Dar khiabanha eshghe nojavani mooj mizad. Mardome Iran ra dost dashtam. Booye koochehaye Irani be man aramesh midad. Negahaye por az mohabateshan va ink man yeki az anha hastam barayam eftekhar bood. Hala taze tame ghorbat ra daroonam hes mikonam. Ghorbaty ke se sal daroonam bood amma jorate boorooz nadasht. Hala delam Iran ra mikhast. Delam vatan ra mitalabid va az deroon oo ra seda mikard. Delam bazgashte hamishegy ra khastar bood. Roo shab mishodo shab rooz va man dar talahs boodam ke mabada vaghty talaf konam va mabada baz ham pashiman bargardam. Vali che fayede, vaght mesle bargh migozasht va pashimani ham jologyry nadasht. Pashinman az tarke Iran, pashiman az deli sang, pashiman az doorie mihan�..

Ceh ghadr forsatha bood ke az dast dade boodam. Doost nadashtam zamane bazgashte ma be Canada berese. Doa doa mikardam amm belakhare vaght eraftan resyd va ma baraye tarke Iran vbary digar amade mishodim. Mabargashtym o taghiri be voojood nayamade bood. Tanha man boodma ke rooshntar az ghabl bargashte boodam, va shayad ham dorost bar ax.

Hame chizo donyaye man daghighan moghei avaz shod ke man bary digar be khake pake mihanam ghadam gozashtam. Eshghe bargasht sarta payam ra gerefte bood. Vali vaghiat in bood ke ta etmame darsam da Toronto mandegar boodam. Doost darshtam faryad bezanam va eteraz konam vali che fayede maloom bood ke in kar amali nabood va man bayad mimandam. ~>khod karde ra tadbir nist<~