"Ronn Moss is the only soap star I've ever met who has made me go all hot and flustered–and he's 50! He's got a thing about him."  –  Sammy

"Have you noticed how people on the soaps always go missing for long periods of time?"  –  Sue

"We should get into her (Joan Collins) sometime. There's plenty to get into."  –  Sue

"Sheila Carter is a hideous character. She never dies–she's like the woman in the bath in 'Fatal Attraction.'"  –  Sammy

"If they're so paralytic that they don't know what they're are doing, why do they always manage to get [the women] pregnant?"  –  Sammy