(A studio set.  The set is brilliantly hued in vibrant and bright primary colors - imagine an entire sky of rainbows; now imagine viewing it through a kaleidoscope. Shanks is sitting in a chair with the word 'Dictator' on the back.  He is wearing shades to save his eyes.)

Shanks:  Alright.  Places everyone!

(The Straw Hat Pirates (chibi-ko versions) come out onto the set.  They are all dressed in brightly colored insane costumes - imagine that the 60s exploded.  The outfits aren't matching, but there is definitely a theme.  The pirates' cheeks are rosy and their eyes shimmer brightly.  In other words they are kawaii.)

Shanks: Good morning.

Pirates (in a chorus): O-HAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shanks (beaming): That's my little stars!  Minna, genki?

Pirates (in a chorus): GEN-KI!

Shanks (frowning): Wait a minute - there aren't enough of you.  I'm counting only six here.

Luffy: But there ARE only six of us, Mr. Shanks.

Shanks: We can't have a lucrative pop sensation with only six members!  (turns to Ben, who has been drinking coffee)  Get me more chibi pirates!

(Ben whips out a keitai and talks for a moment. All the members of Baroque Works (chibi-ko versions) come on stage - they too are dressed in insanely bright costumes - imagine a Grateful Dead video; now imagine viewing it on LSD.)

Shanks: Hmm.  Still not enough.

(The Krieg and Arlong pirates come out (chibi-ko versions).  They are dressed in insanely bright costumes - imagine a Ringling Bros. circus performance on crack.)

Shanks: That description reminds me of something.  Send out Buggy!

(The Buggy pirates come out.  They are dressed in insanely bright costumes - imagine the Buggy pirate crew (chibi-ko versions).

The stage is getting crowded, but everyone is SUGOI GENKI!  And KAWAII!  There is plenty of girlish squealing, Print Club Photo trading, and oohing and ahhing over the magazine cover featuring the newest boy band sensation.)

Shanks: Hmm.

Ben: I think we're hitting the weight limit for the stage.  If we bring out any more pirates, they'll fall into the PakuMaku Comedy Special that's filming downstairs.

Shanks (musing): It's kawaii.  It's fashionable.  It's insanely genki.  But…will it make money?

Ben: We're in Japan.  Of course it'll make money.

Shanks: Yes, but I want an enduring J-Pop legacy!  I want my group to last!  I want to create a pop culture force to be reckoned with!  I want immortality! Muwahahahahaha!

Ben: I know you're still smarting over Ayumi's snub, but revenge is not the answer, Shanks.

Shanks (left eye begins to twitch violently): DON'T mention her!  I told you NEVER to mention that - that - that -  I'll NEVER forgive her for what she said to me backstage at the Red and White Show!  (gains control over himself and views his creation.)  But Ayumi has nothing on this.  She is only one person; I have a legion of pop stars.  They will fill their free time by making mall appearances, being on talk shows, doing product endorsements and touring.  They can infiltrate the airwaves as one group or split into different 'cells' - like Mini-Musu, Musuko Ai, and Tanpocky!  We will be a force to be reckoned with! (Shanks steeples his fingers together, a la Gendo Ikari or Mr. Burns, and smiles.)  Yeeessss.  I think we have a winner here.  Cue the music!

(The intro music begins.  The pirates all squeal with joy and happiness and take their places.  The music picks up and the pirates begin to sing!)

(Glasses break, bats drop out of the rafters, cameras and lights begin to explode spontaneously and the video crew members race for the exits screaming in horror and pain.)

Ben (clutching his head): My ears are bleeding!

Shanks (who has completely lost it): Muwahahahahaha!

Ben: They're tone deaf!  They have no talent! 

(Shanks pauses mid-laugh.  Then Ben and Shanks start giggling uncontrollably.)

Shanks: You said 'talent'!  Hahahahahahaha!

Ben: I know! Hahahahahahaha!