SHEP

Jaunary 1999 - May 2001

((We adopted him in April 2000 from a woman in North Carolina that my older sister knew. We cared and loved him a little over a year before he left us. If I've learned anything: life isn't fair.))

On Monday, May 28, 2001 my dog Shep died.

He was hit by a car on Oakland Drive by a cream-colored van without windows. He lasted for a few minutes and then he died. My father and brother brought him back and my brother was crying. I didn't know why until my father hugged me and I looked over my shoulder. Shep was lying on his pillow, not moving, unlikely behavior for my dog after he went on a run. My dad told me everything and I lost all my composure. I held my dog and stroked his fur. I stayed with him for an hour before we put him into a box. A sat with him, the box open, his blood on my hands (just a droplet or so) and thought about his life with us and how happy he was. My father and brother dug his burial site out back and I sat with him and cried.

We arranged him the way he would've looked on his pillow. We placed him in the box like a curled up position on his pillow, like he was sleeping. I closed his eyes tenderly and my brother and I placed objects he enjoyed around him. His brush, his bones. I even put a treat on his tounge, like Greek burial. We closed the box up with strong tape and a plastic bag to protect him from the elements. My father and brother played Ashokan Farewell, a piano and violin duet before my father and I acted as Pallbearers while my brother carried the basket that held his things.

We carried him around back, the way he liked to run around and put him into the ground amist crying and a few words about him. I thought about what his life meant to me. He was more than my dog, he was almost my best friend. I remember all the good he did for me and how sad I am that he is gone. I can't believe it. My family can't believe it. I mourn his loss with all I possibly can. I'm all cried out so I decided to tell everyone what happened. If you have a pet, treasure him or her while you can. Take as many pictures as you can and love them with all your heart, even when they do something you wish they hadn't. Because when they're gone ... there's nothing you can do.

He was such a good dog. I will always remember how innocent and sweet he looked. How much I loved him. How sad I was when he died. I will always remember when he used to call upon his old country dog style and run off into our huge yard and beyond. In the beginning we didn't like it, but then it became his nature after he went from Beta to Alpha dog. He'd always imagined it some kind of game, I imagine. We'd try to call him back but he'd continue onward. Only now do I realize how cute that was.

Shep was my dearest friend. He'd sit with me when I was sad or when I was watching television or when I was working on the computer. We would go into the basement or outside or just around the house and run around with eachother, I chasing him or he chasing me. He'd bark and I'd growl and we'd laugh with one another as he jumped on me or I on him. Then we'd lie down and breath deeply in each others company.

Only now I realize how much I need him. I will never be alone as long as I think of him. I will think of all the good he did for me and thank him with all my heart. He will never be replaced. There will always be a place in my heart for him, where he will never die.