Animated movie "Return of the King" Posted by Mr Fantasimile on ringbearer.org

I have never been more dissapointed with anything in my entire life! The animation was atrocious, the time wasted showing the fantasies of Samwise was ludricrous, and I didn't much like the fact that they took Yoda, made him into a whiny little human and called it Denethor! The music, was passable. (Though, on about the sixteenth chorus of "The Bearer of the Ring, the Wearer of the Ring..." I began to get VERY tired of it. The voice of the Wraith King made him sound like Snidely Whiplash from the Dudley Do-Right cartoons, and the Mouth of Sauron looked uncomfortably like Bob Dole. I expected him to come out and talk to Aragorn about coping with E.D.! Besides this, Eowyn looked way too much like Sailor Moon for comfort, and Gollum closely resembled and sounded like a hairless South American bushbaby with ahsthma(sp?)! I'm afraid I DO NOT recommend this video. Even if you can find it anyplace in your local video store besides the "$.99 Previously Viewed Movie Rack"

Why do the press always get it wrong? Posted by Monkeyman on ringbearer.org

Here is an article from British movie magazine "Total Film": "With most of the $130 million budget reserved for the dillion or so FX needed to realise Tolkien's visionm the trilogy's big names (Ian Mckellen, Elijah Wood, Ian Holm) have already signed up. But late casting decicions reveal that some surprise roles have just been snapped up. In return for a three-week hiatus from Robert Altman's Dr T and The Women, elf-lookalike Liv Tyler has committed to the hefty nine-month shoot playing one of the trilogy's few female characters, fairy queen Arwen. Perhaps even more inspired, however, is the casting of Hammer stalwart Christopher Lee as Gandalf's wizardy ally and eventual traitor Sauron. With Stuart Townsend already confirmed as weather-beaten knight Aragorn, director Peter Jackson will have already begun principal photography by the time you read this." I count at least 4 mistakes in this one small article, and all this from a so-called proffesional magazine. For some reason I find this incredibly annoying.

Queen of The Faeries Posted by Fairy on ringbearer.org

Boy I tell you, every time I think about it, it really gets to me. I mean,just look at what the word means. It is saying that Arwen is a queen and rules a kingdom of pixie fairies! Not men, but fairies! Not the daughter of Elrond, but queen of freaken fairies! Are you telling me, storming Uruk-hai's lost to pixie dust fairies at Helms Deep? Or that the Witch-king was defeated by tiny, naked, firefly winged humans from some gum-drop candyland?Someone get Liv's publicists a copy of the damn book! This is what happens when you read only the cliff notes!

What's it gonna be, then? Posted by Arwen Lune on ringbearer.org

hey, whatever happened to the idea of casting unknown actors? what will we have then? Ben Afflecks' Boromir succeeds in talking Frodo into giving him the Ring - because a 'fallen' Boromir is bad for Afflecks image. surely? Leonardo DiCaprio's Legolas kills his enemies with a laserpistol- because we can't have him bloodspatted and with his hair all messy, can we? That would scare off all the fans.... Surely? Liz Tylers' Arwen sits in front of her mirror putting on her make-up to impress Boromir. She lets a servant make the banner for Aragorn -dusty old beggar- because sewing is not what a hip elven girl does in this age.(oh *come on*, it's the 3rd age we're living in !). She listens to the new single of the CO2Smiths instead, called 'hurry up with becoming a king 'coz I won't wait for you' [which is of course *the* way to include the soundtrack single] surely? Brad Pitts' Eomer falls for Arwen and chops [no, make that *has someone* chop, we don't want to get dirty] Aragorns head off to get her. Arwen doesn't mind, why would she want a bloke that wants her to sew anyway? surely? Cameron Diaz' Eowyn blinks with her eyelashes and the Witchking is so distracted that Pippin can kick him in his invisible witchking balls? When he falls over Eowyn breaks a nail, causing her to get mortally ill? surely? Whereupon Keanu Reeves' Aragorn reacts: "whoa dude, what a nice chick I see. get away everyone, I've got to use my healing skills" ? Surely? - Everyone's hair is always perfectly and neat - no one gets dirty - no one sweats - no one is ever afraid - no one is ever tired - no one despairs [when a character does, it is told by Leolas: "hey, don't worry, it's only a hollywood movie anyway , no one will die because all the actors have in their contracts that their characters can not die"] - no one dies. Denethor is led away by men in white suits and in the battles everyone is taken captive. surely? Wibble. What? oh yes nurse, I will take that pill right now. Yes I know I should have taken it an hour ago... no! I don't want in a white coat with long sleeves!

Journalistic Rant Posted by Hama on ringbearer.org

I have just read that article from the Scottish Daily Record that Joram has placed on the News Board and I find myself getting more and more annoyed at journalists who don't research their subject, but post the first thing that comes into their heads. for example, the synopsis of the LOTR story is presented thus: In the books, Gandalf leads a band of heroes in a quest to destroy the Dark Lord Sauron, whose rings of power threaten the world. What Sauron lacks is the ruling Ring, which is in the possession of a hobbit called Bilbo Baggins - a small creature with big feet who lives in a quiet, leafy place called The Shire. He uses the Ring for magic party tricks - but little else. When Gandalf tells him that Sauron has enlisted the dreaded orcs and is destroying Middle Earth to find the Ring, the hobbit entrusts it to his nephew Frodo who must venture to the distant Cracks of Doom and destroy it for ever. Not exactly wonderful, is it. Then there is this: Other stars considering roles include Kate Winslet as the elf Eowyn. Elf? Well, he read the story then, didn't he! This isn't the first time I've seen this kind of laziness (and it is laziness). The BBC did it on their Web Site (and withdrew it again), and a number of other news paper articles have perpetrated similar gaffs and errors. Which brings me onto the question, why? Why is it that so many of these articles that appear are inaccurate or just plain wrong! OK, rant over!

The Hobbit Cartoon Posted by Niniel on ringbearer.org

Bilbo looks like a Cabbage Patch doll; the dwarves look like troll dolls; the trolls look like genetic crosses between pigs and monkeys; Gandalf looks like some sort of bird; the goblins look like either possesed baked potatos or something out of a Dr. Seuss book...OH NO!!! THAT CURSED SONG IS PLAYING AGAIN! Why oh why do my younger siblings have to watch it right now?! if ever! Without saying anything else, I think you get the impression that this movie is one of the most annoying things that ever happened to me. Thank God I never saw the Lord of the Rings.

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